Chapter Nine: Sweet and Tart

I'm so ugly. Honda thought, thinking about the times he had stared in the mirror. That disgusting, disgraceful boy was the farthest thing from manhood; let alone beauty.

Why would anyone fall in love with me?

Ryou remained in his spot on the couch. His body was trembling from head to toe. How did he get the courage to confess something like that to me? Honda asked himself. Seto Kaiba's eyes suddenly glared at Honda with the blazing blue they were. Honda couldn't, he wouldn't, dare to tell Seto the truth of his love. So, how did Ryou? How did the boy who was scared of his own shadow admit to such a thing?

"I'm sorry." Ryou said softly, "I probably sound ridiculous." He hid his eyes behind his bangs.

Honda shook his head, "No, Ryou." He pulled the smaller boy into his arms, "I'm the one whose sorry." He kissed the other boy's forehead, "I can't love you back."

Ryou nodded with a sad smile on his lips. He looked up at Honda and said, "I understand." He felt the familiar feeling of tears in his eyes. He hid it well as he stood from the couch. He raised his arms above his head and stretched his body out.

It didn't matter if Honda was in love with him or not, he couldn't ignore the marvels of his friend. He smiled and said, "Ryou, you're amazing." He shut off the movie and stood from the couch as well, brushing cookie crumbs off of his pants.

Ryou's cheeks flushed as he put his arms down, "What do you mean by that?"

Honda shook his head, "Nothing." He smiled, "Let's just go to sleep." He offered his hand.

That sadness returned onto Ryou's lips. He took the boy's hand and nodded, "Yes, I suppose it's a little late."

They journeyed up the stairs and into Ryou's bedroom. Honda shut the door while Ryou pulled back the sheets.

"Will you need another blanket?" Ryou asked a little too calmly. It was as if the past ten minutes hadn't even happened.

Honda slipped under the covers, "No, I'm fine." He grinned, "Are you planning to sleep in a sweater?"

"I was going to change." Ryou said, sticking out his tongue to tease.

Honda rested his head behind his threaded hands. He sat up in the pillows and watched as Ryou removed the thick sweater. He couldn't help but chuckle as Ryou modestly hid himself as he grabbed a T-shirt from the drawer. "There's no reason to be shy, Ryou."

"That's easy for you to say." Ryou shot back; sitting on the bed, "You're…" he bit his lip, blushing pinker than ever before, "forget it."

Honda smiled, pulling Ryou into his lap, "Come here." He ran a hand down his friend's chest and torso, "See? You're perfectly fine the way you are." He kissed Ryou where his heart would be, "Especially right here."

The smaller boy trembled again. He wrapped his arms around himself and shook his head, "Stop it." he said firmly, before taking the shirt and tugging it on. He didn't sound angry, but he knew that they were going down a path he didn't want to explore.

"Ryou…" Honda frowned, realizing he had hurt his feelings, "I'm sorry."

"I know." Ryou nodded, burying his body under the blankets. He shut the lamp beside him off and said softly, "Good night, Honda." He curled up and turned his back on the one he loved.

Honda stayed sitting up, staring at Ryou's back for the longest time. He was searching for something; except, he didn't really know what he was looking for. It was as if his mind had suddenly gone out for a coffee break and was waiting for the doughnuts to be restocked. He didn't know if he could explain it in words how he suddenly felt. All he knew was that a little part of him had died tonight and he didn't think it would ever revive itself.

Sighing, he laid down on his back, replacing his head on top of his threaded hands. He looked up at the ceiling and said back, "Good night, Ryou."

x-x-x

The corridor was longer than Honda had remembered. The plush carpet that lined the way cushioned his feet as he continued to travel. He found himself in front of the same dark stained doors. With cautious hands, he pushed the doors open.

Seto Kaiba was smirking at Honda from his desk. The silver rimmed glasses rested on his nose while his strong hands supported his chin. He only continued to smirk as he slipped the glasses off and into his pocket, "What can I do for you, Hiroto?" he said the name with the same melody Honda had now fallen in love with.

"Seto…" Honda whispered softly. He couldn't control himself any longer. He was going to burst. He climbed onto Seto's desk, pushing away all of the papers. He grabbed the taller boy by each side of his jacket collar and smashed their lips together.

Seto didn't object. He parted the opening of Honda's lips with his tongue and eagerly traveled inside. Honda played along, running his hands through the chestnut hair that he had fawned over for so long.

A dull thud had caused them to break apart. Honda whipped his head around, his hands still buried in Seto's hair. It was Jou; his knees had become weak and caused him to fall onto the floor.

"H-Honda?" Jou questioned. He couldn't be seeing what he was. He couldn't be sure of the sight before him. Nothing could be so hideous and untrue.

"Jou!" Honda said, standing, "Please don't-"

"No, you don't!" Jou snapped with fury in his heart and showed through his eyes. He shook his head, "How could you, Honda?" he shouted, his body shaking in rage, "I TRUSTED YOU!"

Honda snapped his eyes open; he jumped out of bed and into Ryou's bathroom. No. No! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to! He shut the door to the bathroom quickly and held himself above the sink. His breath had become ragged and a cool sweat layered over his body. He couldn't handle it and leaned over, vomiting into the toilet.

I can't let that happen. Honda said, now on his knees in front of the toilet. He continued to breathe as if he was being strangled. I won't let that happen. He stood back up, staggering slightly. He stared into the mirror and scowled at his reflection. Had he gotten even thinner? He made himself sick just by looking at himself. He fell down to his knees once more, facing the toilet as he let it go again.

Deep down, he knew this wasn't going to be the first time he was going to end up like this.

x-x-x

Honda didn't take long in the bathroom after that. He brushed his teeth and splashed a large amount of water onto his face. He made sure his skin had returned to its normal color and left the small room. The hallway was still dark even though the window in the bathroom had the early morning light shining through it. Honda blamed it on the yami. He hated light in the house.

Ryou was still in his dreams when Honda had returned. The other boy closed to door behind him and watched for awhile with his back pressed against the wood. He was guarding the door, making sure nobody could come in and disrupt the beauty that had blessed the room.

I promised never to let anyone hurt you, Honda smiled sadly. He sighed and climbed back into bed, but nobody could protect me from the pain I give you. He watched Ryou's face smooth over with sleep. There was a certain peace that Honda could never express as he watched the winter morning make the room glow through the white blinds that shaded Ryou's windows. He played with the silver tips of his hair and glided it over the olive of his own cheek. His best friend was nothing more than a Christmas angel; a perfect, glowing, snowy white angel.

The only snow I'll put up with. Honda laughed a little through his nose.

It didn't take long for the fluttering of Ryou's eyelashes to occur. The usually wide brown eyes were half lidded as he smiled at his friend, "Mm Happy Christmas Eve." He yawned a little, covering his mouth in politeness.

Honda smiled, kissing Ryou's forehead, "Same to you." He said softly as to not disturb Ryou's waking up, "Did I wake you?"

"No, I'm normally up this early." Ryou said with a sleepy tone. He didn't sit up yet, enjoying the sight of his adoration. It was better than hot tea. "Yami's always begging for breakfast at this hour."

"Oh." Honda propped himself up with an elbow, "Well, I need to leave for Jou's in a couple hours. You want me to make you breakfast?"

Ryou smiled as he yawned again, "Two eggs and an English muffin with strawberry jam, please? If we've run out of strawberry, grape would be excellent."

Honda tapped Ryou's nose, "You got it. Do you want some tea before that?" he slid out of bed, already used to the chill that greeted him outside of the blankets.

"Green would be lovely, thanks." Ryou replied as he waved lazily at Honda, "Wake me when it's ready." He rolled over and threw the blanket over his head.

Honda laughed, grinning at the ball where his friend laid. He journeyed down the stairs to find Yami no Bakura sitting on the counter. His calloused hand was wrapped around a mug of coffee. It was the appropriate black and somehow smelt a little burnt.

It was normal for Honda to ignore Bakura but, for some reason, the blackness of the coffee was reflecting in the spirit's eyes. Honda couldn't ignore the stare and said firmly, "What?"

Bakura took a few minutes. He took a gulp of the caffeine and said sternly, "Don't play with him."

"What are you talking about?" Honda said, putting the kettle Ryou used for tea on the stove. He wiped off the water droplets with a bit of a scowl on his face.

There was bitterness in the way Bakura dumped the dregs of his coffee into the sink. He took a box of cigarettes from his shirt pocket and held one between his long fingers, "I'm not stupid, Kid." He placed the smoke between his lips and lit the stick. He took a deep inhale, letting the smoke return into the air through his words, "I know what happened last night and I'm just warning you not to take another step towards Ryou."

"Are you protecting him? That's quite nice of you, Bakura." Honda snapped back as he took out a tea bag and mug. He waved the smoke coming towards him away with his hand.

The idea of himself being "nice" disgusted Bakura. "I'm not protecting him." He confessed, shoving a hand in his pocket, "I'm helping you." He took a seat back on the counter and flicked the ashes of his cigarettes into the mug he had just used, "Ryou's not a stable being. He's actually quite broken already. I'm more than surprised that he hasn't drowned himself in the bath tub yet."

"How dare you!" Honda interrupted, angry beyond belief. Nobody was going to speak of his friend that way. He was loyal to all of his friends until the end.

"Relax, Pretty boy. Don't get your panties all in a knot." A sick grin formed on his lips, "Or do you not wear any?" He took another drag from his cigarette and glared at Honda from the corner of his eye, "I'm just telling you like it is. The doll is ripped, don't pull at the thread. Do you understand me? I don't know you, nor care about you. I don't really care about Ryou. I'm just making sure there isn't more shit I got to clean up at the end of the day." He put the cigarette out in the coffee mug and jumped off the counter, scratching the back of his head and yawning, "But hey…" he grinned, looking over his shoulder, "Who would trust someone like me?" he gave the other boy a mock salute and cradled his rear through his back pockets as he went up the stairs and disappeared from sight.

Honda stood in the middle of the kitchen floor. He stared at the spot Bakura had disappeared from. Again, he continued to search, but no results were uncovered. Was he really going to trust the yami's words?

Did Bakura assume Honda was sleeping with Ryou? Yes, Honda cared for the boy, but Seto. Wasn't Honda just in the bathroom this morning praying for freedom from Seto's bindings? Honda was not going to give up on the brunet. Nor… nor did he want to throw Ryou away.

He's actually quite broken already…

Bakura's voice starting to ring in Honda's ears. He wouldn't be surprised if the spirit's words were true. Though, there was something about what he had said. Did Bakura know something Honda didn't?

The tea kettle whistled and grabbed Honda's attention. He turned the stove off and poured the water into the mug with the tea bag floating at the top. The marble from the Ramune bottle came to mind. Honda's body suddenly turned cold; remembering how easily it had sunk to the bottom.

x-x-x

It was somewhat of a filler chapter, I know, but I plan on updating again really soon. I'm quite excited by how this is turning out and new ideas are constantly pouring into my mind. I'm VERY happy with Bakura in this chapter. I love the way I portray him. Or maybe it's just me? Anyways, thanks you for your reading and support. I 3 you guys!