Jeesh! This is one of my longest chapters, I think! I went through this quickly when I first wrote it, wanting to get to the end. Now, I'm re-wrote it and added more detail and junk! Hope you enjoy
NOTE: This is a doublely long chapter! There may be NO second update today because of the fact that I have to edit it to change a few things. I have 18 days left until school starts and have barely started my homework...that comes before fanfiction. I will try and set aside half an hour to do this, but my homework comes first, understand?
Chapter 20: Are you…sure?
Last time: "Colonel," she gasped out, her blue eyes enlarging as she took another step back, a corner of her mind triumphently yelling, told you!
"Sam," he said softly, stepping forward and grabbing her arm, pulling her from her corner and seating her at the table. Sam found herself powerless against his actions, lost in the brilliant sight of his swimming brown eyes. She stared at him dumbly as she folded her dress out so she could sit on the chair properly. "Glad you could join me."
The spell broke as he talk. Air rushed into Sam's lungs as she realized that she had been holding her breath, and had only just let it go. Her head was swimming. So it was Jack. Her mind yelled at her happily, screaming fits of I knew it, I knew it, I knew it! But the more rational, scientific side of her brain told her that she was still dreaming. Stepping carefully about what she said, she chose the safe side as she spoke. "Sir?" Sam asked, watching breathlessly, her heart beating wildly as she watched O'Neill open the covered plate and place tenderly cooked chicken, corn, and mashed potatoes on her plate.
"Perfect choice for the dress, by the way," he said, flicking his eyes up to her once to give her a small, nervous smile. His heart fluttered against his chest as he took in her sight. A few days ago, when she was still in the infirmary, O'Neill had asked for permission from General Hammond to contact the Tok'ra. Upon doing so, he had immediately sought out Jacob's help.
"Colonel?" her tone of voice, meant to be stern, was betrayed by a trace of fear. Of course I have every right to be scared! she reminded herself. This was not a normal occurrence after all.
"I figured you wouldn't mind a dinner, Sam," O'Neill said. Her name in his voice sent shivers down her spine. "Was I wrong?" There was no concern at all in his voice, no doubts and all the while he was dishing out his own dinner. He knew her too well.
Her breath caught in her throat. Forcing herself to breathe evenly, Sam said, "No, sir." Until she got answers there would be nothing on a personal level from her. She felt her back stiffen at the thought.
"Jack," O'Neill said, looking up sharply from his plate and catching her gaze, commanding her eyes with his own. "Leave sir at the base, Sam," he said, using her first name again for emphasis.
Sam reached up and fingered her temples, with her forefinger, hoping warding off a headache she prayed wasn't going to come. "But regulations…"
"Can be bent, Sam," O'Neill said, grinning as he sat down across the table from her, picking up his utensils. He waggled his eyebrows playfully at her, and her breathing quickened. "Especially when Hammond owes you a favor."
Sam blinked and looked at him quizzically, forcing the smile off of her face. If she was wrong she didn't want her hopes crushed…but not matter how well she could control her mouth, she couldn't control her heart. The muscle was beating wildly in the cage made by her ribs. Was he really serious? "So…"
Though his face stayed void of emotions, his eyes betrayed his thoughts. Gazing into his brown orbs, Sam saw the one emotion that the Colonel always hid or covered up. The emotion that he let slip into his gaze only rarely when he looked at her. Love. He lifted his eyebrows and tilted his head, forcing her to continue on her own.
"This is perfectly okay with the president…" She breathed out the statement, unable to say the words evenly, her breath un-even out of sheer excitement.
"One-hundred percent," he said, smiling warmly at her. In his mind he was thinking, I traded my soul for you.
The smile that she had forced away earlier slipped gracefully onto Sam's face, gracing her visage with a radiant beauty, sending Jack head over heals in love again. The corners of his own lips twitched into a deeper smile. He had defiently made the right choice.
Sam, thinking of no better way to accept Jack's offer, picked up her knife and fork, sliding the fork into the chicken and dragging the knife in-between the tongs until a slice was cut from the bird. Delicately, she picked the sliver up with her fork, raised it to her lips, and, tilting it slightly in O'Neill's direction with a small nod of her head, dropped the morsel into her mouth. She smiled at Jack as she swallowed.
The Colonel smiled back, the leathery lines in his face showing the relief he felt from her actions, and he too began sawing away at the meat in-front of him.
xxx
Dinner was eaten in complete silence, with small, reassuring glances exchanged between the pair as they continued. A smile, a wink, a nod of the head, a batter of the eyes, all signs to keep the atmosphere comfortable. The un-spoken emotion in the air wrapped around Sam's shoulders like a blanket, engulfing her and winding it's way into the deepest corners of her heart.
"Dinner was great," she said, beaming at Jack as she placed her utensils down on the plate with a small tink from silver on silver. She picked up the napkin and dabbed it over her lips before folding it neatly on top of the plate as well.
"Good," O'Neill said. "I made it myself." He adjusted his position to sit up against the chair proudly. With a small snort of dis-belief, Sam raised her eyebrows and he smiled innocently. "From a freezer bag…of course."
Sam grinned, and found herself fiddling with the linen napkin on her plate. Her mind wandered, searching for something to say. When she finally landed on her choice, she looked up at Jack, biting her lower lip, unsure.
Jack sighed, seeing the question in her eyes, knowing he wouldn't like what followed. "Go ahead," he said softly. He waved his hand at her with a grin, "Permission to speak freely."
The woman smiled a tight smile, feeling the constriction around her heart lessen a little. Dipping her head for a moment, she looked back up. "I want to talk about the baby," she whispered softly.
Jack grimaced, he had known he wasn't going to like this, and he was right. Standing up, he grasped Sam's hand from her and pulled her up, placing his right hand on her right shoulder as he led her into the living-room and sat her down on the couch next to him, turned so that they were facing each-other. He nodded at her to continue.
"I…should have told you," she whispered, her voice wavering as she looked to the floor. "But I figured…after Charlie, you wouldn't…"
Shaking his head in a sort of grim amusement, Jack lifted her chin so he was looking her in the eyes. "I'll tell you something I told Kawalksy once," he said, pausing as she gazed back at him, her sapphire eyes gleaming with un-shed tears, forced back from years of training. "Sara forgave me for what happened to Charlie, but could never forget. On the other hand, I could never forgive myself, but always forget."
Sam kept her gaze at him steady, but he felt her jaw twitch under his fingers. Obviously she wasn't taking this the right way. He sighed. "I'll never make the same mistake twice," he said, stroking her cheek with his thumb.
"But if I hadn't gone on the mission," Sam continued, her voice small and strained as she spoke.
O'Neill cut her off. "If I hadn't sent you to dial home…"
"If I had told you!" Sam snapped, yanking her chin away from his fingers, and burrowing her head into his hands. "God, Jack," she said. "I would still be pregnant!"
Sliding over on the couch, Jack pulled her into him, letting her rest her head against his shoulders. "I don't blame you for not telling me," he told her softly. "After all, I wasn't to gung-ho happy when I found out we were married." Which, he thought grimly. Had been the entire downfall from the start. He nudged her shoulder lightly. "Which was shock, by the way," he whispered into her ear.
Sam nodded into his head, but didn't take his words in depth. He continued, floundering for the right words to say, to cheer her up, to continue with his master plan. "Besides," he said. "If you had told me, and I hadn't sent you to the DHD, and you hadn't blacked out, you wouldn't have remembered, and we would have your word against no-ones. For any matter, you'd be walking around pregnant with a horrible rumor saying the child was Teal'c's."
Sam's head shot up as she drew in a ragged breath of air in a strangled laugh. "Teal'c?" she said, wiping away a stray tear and letting a smile slink back on her face, like a dog with its tail in-between its legs, asking its master if it was okay to be happy again.
Jack, glad his ruse worked, sat up stiffly against the couch, squared his shoulders, steeled his face and quirked a single eyebrow, turning his head slowly to look at Carter. "Indeed," he said, dropping the face after a second to waggle his eyebrows.
Sam laughed softly, letting the happiness creep back into her corners as the dogs tail raised when his master patted him on the head. "So we're okay?" she asked quietly.
"Of course."
xxx
For a few minutes, they sat together on the couch in silence. Sam was lost in quiet thoughts when Jack slipped away from the couch. She followed him for a moment with her eyes before returning to watching her hands. That was when she heard the music strike up again. Looking up, she saw Jack standing in front of her, his hand outstretched. "Dance with me?" he asked her.
Sam slid her hand into his, and he pulled her up from her sofa, drawing her close to him. He twined his arm around her waist, placing his hand in the small of her back, and she snaked her arm behind his back, resting her hand closer to the base of his neck. With his simple touch, all her problems and dark thoughts from moments before drifted away as she lost herself in his embrace.
As they spun softly around the room, Sam found her heart thudding with emotion, and shuddered slightly at the enticing touch of the Colonel. Her dreams were finally real. Tentatively, she closed the few inches gap between them and rested her head on his chest, breathing in his one-of-a-kind scent.
Jack smiled and readjusted his grip, glad to pull her in softly so that it seemed that ever part of their body touched. The last time he had danced with a woman like this was when he and Sara were still together…(There hadn't been much music at their wedding in the other planet. Customs were...different there.)
The music slowed to a stop and so did the dance. Sam looked up Jack and gazed into his entrancing eyes. He lowered his head to kiss her and…
"Ready for desert?" he breathed softly, his breath whipping Sam's hair lightly out of her eyes.
Masking her disappointment, Carter nodded. O'Neill smiled and slipped out of her grasp and slid into the kitchen. Sitting back down on the chair at the table, Sam looked at the settings again to calm her racing heart.
A single object, hidden near the bouquet of roses tugged at the corner of her vision. Sam leaned over and picked it up, turning it in her fingers.
"Sir…"
"Sam…" the voice warned, making sure she understood their un-spoken agreement.
"Jack…," Sam said, changing her statement, flipping the object around still. "Where did you get this?"
xx
Jeesh. Okay, well, now JACK went out of character, but you all said "they need to discuss the baaaaaby" and were all asking me about that so don't go complaining to me saying they were out of character in that part (other parts, before and after the discussion are fine.) because I wrote it for you.
