Chapter 6: I Don't Want to be Alone Right Now
They made it to the motel and walked up to the front desk to get their keys. Hotch was lucky enough to get everyone their own room for the night. Emily and Reid made their way to their rooms. Their rooms were right across from one another. For the two of them, that was a good thing. They wished each other a good night before going their separate ways.
Emily opened her go bag and got out her comfortable clothes to sleep in. After changing, she sat on the bed with her book in hand. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't take her mind off of the events that had occurred recently. What scared her the most was that Doyle was still out there. She feared for her family and herself. She remembered him telling her that he was going to take something that meant everything to her. Trembling, she got up and made her way across the hall and knocked on the door.
"Emily," Spencer said as he opened the door. He motioned for her to come in. She apologized for disturbing him, which he insisted that she didn't. "What brings you here? You couldn't sleep either?" He asked as she walked in and closed the door behind them.
"I don't want to be alone right now." She admitted as she sat down on the couch next to him. She felt a dull ache in her abdomen but thought nothing of it at the moment. Reid put an arm around her bringing her closer to him. She buried her head into his shoulder and just stayed like that for a few minutes before looking up at him.
"If you want to talk about it, I'm here." He looked down into her eyes. She looked up into his and nodded. Emily felt safe with him, so she decided to open up to him.
"Spense, I'm scared." Her voice trembled as she tried not to break down in front of him. He didn't even have to ask why because he already knew. Reid knew that Ian Doyle was still out there, and what he was capable of.
"He won't come near you ever again." He promised her. "I won't let him." He added. Emily knew he meant it too. Spencer Reid was much tougher than most people thought, especially when it came to protecting those he loves. He would do anything to make sure Emily was out of harm's way.
"I don't want him to hurt you to get back at me." Emily made known that it wasn't just her life that was in danger. She couldn't hold it back any longer and broke down. She apologized for him having to see her like that.
"Em, look at me." He said getting her attention. She looked at him with tears falling. "You don't need to apologize for this." He told her as he wiped her tears away. He knew that she was still in shock from what had happened.
"I can't lose you." She told him how much he meant to her. Spencer placed a gently kiss on her forehead and just held her as she calmed down.
"You won't." He promised her that they would get through this together. He yawned and pointed towards the bed. "How about we try to get a good night's sleep." He suggested as he got up from the couch. He crawled in bed and waited for Emily to join him.
It didn't take them long to fall asleep. Sleep for Emily, however, was short lived. The abdominal pain that she was experiencing earlier had not gone away. She figured it was just cramps and she was about to get her period. She tried her hardest to fall back asleep. It was an unsuccessful attempt because her abdominal pain started to intensify. Emily rolled over on her side and curled up into the fetal position with her arms around her abdomen hoping to ease the pain.
Spencer woke up to a feint noise coming from right next to him. He turned on the lamp on the nightstand next to him and looked around. His heart sank when he realized that the whimper like sounds were coming from Emily. At first he thought she was having a nightmare, but that wasn't the case at all.
"Emily, what's wrong?" Spencer asked as he sat up in the bed.
"It's nothing, I'm fine, it will go away." She snapped at him before she winced in pain. He knew better than to believe that.
"Emily." He replied hoping that she would stop being stubborn and tell him what was causing her discomfort. It was obvious that she was in pain. Emily hated when people saw her like this, even her lover.
"Don't Emily me." She snapped as she wrapped her arms around her abdomen and clenched her jaw to stop herself from making a sound. Reid noticed the beads of sweat dotting her forehead and that she was paler than usual. Emily regretted snapping at him and apologized "I'm sorry." She apologized as she took a deep breath to try and breathe through the pain.
"What are you expecting to go away?" He asked calmly hoping he didn't upset her more. He knew that she didn't mean to snap at him, so he brushed it off. Finding out what was wrong with her was way more important to him. Spencer remembered the paramedic telling him, and also Emily herself, that she could potentially have internal bleeding. The thought of that terrified him.
"Abdominal pain. It feels like really, really bad cramps." She whimpered as she tried to curl tighter around herself. Usually Reid would blush and walk away at the mention of female problems, but he had a gut feeling that this was something serious.
"Em, get dressed. We're going to the hospital." Reid urged her to get out of bed. He gave her a pair of his sweatpants since they were right there. It hurt for her to stand up as well. Emily knew most of the pain was from the nasty beating and torture from Doyle.
"Spense, I'm fi…" She was about to protest but winced in pain. Reid wasn't about to take no for an answer.
"Em, the paramedics said that the beating and torture could have possibly caused internal bleeding." He countered her protest. She hadn't argued with him about it yet. It was now his turn to let her know how much she meant to him. "I can't lose you." He hoped that she would go now. If Spencer couldn't convince her to go, he would have to get Hotch to force her to go.
She only agreed to go because it was Spencer asking her to go. He was the only one that could convince Emily Prentiss to change her mind once it was made up. She ended up needing something out of her room, so he offered to go get it for her. He grabbed her bag with her belongings just in case it was needed.
"Please promise me you won't call the team unless it's a life-or-death diagnosis." She bargained with him. He agreed not to call them unless it was something serious. He knew she was close to all of them, but he respected her wishes. She would have done the same thing for him.
"Of course." He answered back as he helped her into the SUV. Her pain was intensifying as they spoke. He was driving as fast as he could without getting pulled over.
Once there, they took Emily to the back rather quickly because Reid mentioned she was an FBI agent injured in the field. They told Reid that only a significant other or family member was allowed back with her. He told them that they were together, and Emily vouched for him. Even if they weren't actually together, Emily still would have done the same, especially after what she just went through. She didn't want to be alone. Emily wanted the pain to go away.
After she was settled in and changed into a gown, a nurse came in and took her vitals. Then after that she started asking Emily questions about her symptoms. A doctor came in and an ultrasound was done to confirm what they thought was causing Emily's pain. Reid held her hand through it all.
"Agent Prentiss, did you know that you were pregnant?" The doctor asked. Emily shook her head, she couldn't believe it. She actually was pregnant and didn't know it.
"My cycles have been irregular for a while now. I guess I didn't think anything of it. I've been stressed lately too." She said calmly. "I honestly thought I was about to get my period." She added as the doctor prepared to break the news to them.
"You were about ten weeks along, but trauma to your abdomen triggered a miscarriage." The doctor had informed Emily and Spencer what was wrong. After hearing that he squeezed her hand reminding her that he was there for her and was not going anywhere. "Once it starts there's no stopping it." She added and mentioned that they would monitor her to make sure there were no complications due to her injuries. The doctor then went over the next steps with her. She then explained the different options for treatment. Emily didn't want anything invasive due to her traumatic experience when she was a teen. The doctor walked out to give them some privacy and said that she would be back to check on Emily later.
"I guess I'm not meant to be a mother." Emily gave a bitter laugh. She was now thinking about the child that she aborted when she was fifteen, and now this one that she was losing now. This time she was ready to be a mother.
"Don't give up hope on it just yet, Em." He reminded her that this was not her fault. She knew that she still had time left to have a child but was distraught that she lost another chance at being a mother.
"I would have had a twenty-three your old son or daughter had I not gotten an abortion years ago." She opened up to Reid about her past. "I got pregnant at fifteen, Spense. I was so scared." She went on about how she couldn't go to her mother about anything. Her mother was physically and emotionally unavailable, and she really didn't know too many people since she moved often. Emily also opened up to him about her friend Matthew, and how he helped her through the whole traumatic event. The child wasn't even his, and his life went downhill because he helped her. Reid remembered that case very well, and now understood why she was so torn over the whole thing.
"Emily, listen to me. You cannot blame yourself for having a miscarriage, Matthews death, or the choices you had to make in the past that were necessary." He pleaded with her to not blame herself for things that were out of her control. Emily didn't respond right away due to the wave of pain that struck her, but she was listening. After the pain subsided, she spoke.
"I'm sorry you had to find out like this." She apologized yet again. Emily couldn't hold back the tears anymore, so she just let them fall. She told him how she had negative pregnancy tests when she first had her suspicions. Then she went on about how she bought more not long before she left to find Doyle because she still hadn't had her period by then. Emily told him that she never got to see the results of those pregnancy test because someone had invaded her home while she was in it. "I wish I could have told you in some cute, creative way." She sobbed at the thought and braced herself for more painful cramping.
"Emily we are going to get through this together." Spencer promised as he tried his best to comfort her. He felt bad that there wasn't more that he could do for her. He hated seeing his Emily hurt like this and wished he could take away her pain. He got closer to her so he could do his best just to be there for her.
"I'm so sorry, Spencer." She managed to choke out before her eyes closed tightly and her face scrunched up. Emily cried out in agony as the worst pain yet ripped through her lower abdomen. The second she felt it, she knew what this was, what it meant. Reid tightened his grip knowing this as well. She couldn't see it, but he too was crying. Seeing her curl her body up tight broke his heart.
Even after the worst of the pain subsided, she remained curled up. She didn't need the doctor to tell her what just happened. She tried to curl up tighter while hiding her face in the sheets as she sobbed. Spencer Reid was at a loss for words. He knew that nothing he could say to her would change the outcome. She still had a tight grip on one of his hands. He wasn't about to let go of her. He situated himself next to her and put his free arm around her, and just held her as she cried. They stayed like that until the doctor came back hours later.
He tapped Emily gently and let her know that the doctor had returned. She uncurled herself and laid flat so the doctor could do an ultrasound to confirm that everything had passed. Emily was no longer pregnant.
"Agent Prentiss, I don't see any evidence of complications." She informed Emily that everything seemed normal. She prescribed Emily with some painkillers to ease the pain from the miscarriage and the injuries from Doyle's attack. "You should be able to go back to work the next day as well, but please take it easy." She cautioned Emily knowing what her work involved.
"Is she free to go now?" Reid asked as he looked down at his watch. It had been five and a half hours since they rushed Emily to the back. The doctor was now giving them aftercare instructions.
"Doctor Reid, Agent Prentiss is now free to go." The doctor replied as she gave them the discharge papers and the prescription to get filled. Emily was thankful that Spencer had grabbed her a comfortable set of clothes to go home in. After she had changed, they made their way out of the hospital. Much to Reid's surprise, Emily did not fight the wheelchair. Once they were at the SUV, Reid helped an exhausted Emily get in. He got in on the driver's side and they left for the pharmacy to fill Emily's prescription and to pick up a few things.
