The Fortune Cookie's Always Right


Disclaimer: I own nothing but my imagination.

Author's Note: Ok, so technically I didn't get the 50 reviews to post tonight, but what the hell, I'm posting anyway! And can I just say that 99 of you guessed that the blonde was Honor, but one reviewer wins for most creative guess: "Right so the leggy blonde is Logan's mother's lesbian girlfriend's decorator that he has hired to seduce Dean. And he and Logan have a confrontation when the two are discovered making out (Dean and the blond not Dean and Logan who is blond but so far from the point right now). Ahem." Great great great! That's what I love to hear, ladies. :) So, without further ado, the next chapter!


CHAPTER 11: YOU ARE IN QUITE A PICKLE, YES SIR


Rory stormed into her dorm, ignoring Paris and going straight to her room, slamming the door behind her.

"Rory, is that you?" Paris called from her room.

"No," Rory called, flopping down on her bed. The last thing she wanted to deal with right now was Paris. She curled up in a ball and tried not to cry. She was unsuccessful.

Paris burst in the door.

"What is it, Paris?" Rory barked.

"Wow. Lovely little Blair Witch thing you've got going on," Paris remarked callously. "Tissue?" she offered.

"Point, Paris. Get to it," Rory said, blowing her nose.

"Nevermind. I can't talk to you when you're like this." Paris stormed out of the room. Rory made a face at her door, knowing full well that Paris couldn't see her. She eased off the bed and bent over to set her overnight bag on her desk chair. When she stood up, she was eye level with her memo board. "Romance comes into your life this year in a very unusual sort of way," she read aloud. Rory laughed humorlessly. "Oh, it's unusual alright." She pulled the fortune off her board and tossed it in the trash, crawling back into bed. Rory sighed and turned off the light.


Rory listlessly picked at her food, finally setting down her fork and leaning her head in her hand, elbow resting on the table.

"Ok, I know you're in some kind of funk, but have you heard anything I've been saying?" Paris asked.

"Yes," Rory said. "You laid down the law, Doyle is now committing, everybody's happy, the end," Rory said.

"Ok, that's it, I have got to know what's wrong with you, otherwise it's going to ruin my lunch, not to mention the rest of my day, so spill," Paris ordered.

Rory sighed. "Ok. So you know how I imposed the no-kissing rule on Logan?"

"Yes, I used the same thing on Doyle and he cracked within the hour."

"Right. Well, apparently Logan couldn't handle it," Rory said bitterly.

"What do you mean?" asked Paris.

"I mean that last night when I went to his room, I caught him with another woman."

"What?" Paris said. "That little weasel!"

"Precisely," Rory said. "I mean, it didn't take very long! A couple of days, and bam! He found himself a hussy."

"Wow. You don't hear the word 'hussy' bandied about much these days," Paris commented.

Rory picked up her fork, nudging the food around her plate before dropping it again. "You wanna know the worst part?" she said.

"What?" Paris asked.

"The weird thing is that she looked like someone we'd be friends with, you know? Not some two-bit floozy. She didn't look like any of those party girls we're used to seeing hang all over him," Rory said.

"It is a puzzlement," Paris said.

Logan walked up to their table, a smile on his face but confusion and hurt in his eyes. "Hey, Ace… I missed you last night. What happened?"

Rory stared resolutely at her lunch tray. Logan tried again.

"Um… I tried to call you, but your phone went straight to voicemail. Are you ok?" he asked.

"Do you hear something?" Rory asked Paris, cocking her head to one side.

"It's all Charlie Brown teacher talk to me," Paris said, not acknowledging his presence.

Rory looked at Logan. "I'm sorry, I don't speak jerk." She grabbed her tray and stood up, depositing it before walking away, leaving Logan standing there, scratching his head.

"I don't get it – what's wrong?" he said.

"Are you kidding me?" Paris asked. "How dumb are you, really?"

"Paris, can you just tell me what's going on?"

"I think you're well aware of what's going on, considering it was going on in your pants," Paris retorted.

"Excuse me?" Logan said incredulously.

"You heard me. You lull Rory into a false sense of security, gain her trust, only to be screwing around behind her back this whole time? You disgust me, and you're damn lucky if she doesn't pull a Lorena Bobbitt on your ass," Paris said.

"Look, I don't know what the hell you're talking about, but-" Logan stopped, the lightbulb going off in his head. "Oh no," he groaned, sitting down in Rory's vacant seat.

"Oh no is right, you bastard. Don't sit down – did I say you could sit down?" Paris said.

"Paris, listen, did Rory come to my room last night?" Logan asked intensely.

"So what if she did? Sad that you got caught?" Paris said, steel in her voice.

"She must have seen Honor. Shit!" Logan said.

"Is there any reason why you're still sitting here?" Paris said, annoyed.

"Paris, Honor is my sister," Logan said.

"Your what?" Paris said.

"My sister! She came over yesterday to tell me that Josh – her boyfriend – finally proposed. She was showing off her engagement ring. Man, I can't believe this!" he said, sitting back and running his fingers through his hair in frustration.

"So you're telling me you made out with your sister?" Paris said dubiously.

"Gross! No way! I gave her a hug, that's it…Rory must have seen her at the door. Shit, shit, shit. What am I going to do?" Logan said.

"Beats me," Paris said, taking a bite and looking very unconcerned. "You are in quite a pickle, yes sir."

Logan thought for a moment. "Ok, so it's Friday, so she's got Friday night dinner with her grandparents, right?" he said.

"Yeah, but there's some festival in Podunk tonight that she was planning on going to, so I don't know when she's having dinner, or if it's even still on," Paris said. Her eyes narrowed. "Why, are you planning some wild apology?"

"I didn't do anything wrong!" Logan pointed out.

Paris just looked at him.

He sighed. "Yes."

"Good," Paris said.

Logan just sat there.

"Well, what are you waiting for?" Paris asked. "Go! Shoo!"

"I'm going, I'm going!" Logan said. "Geez."


Rory pulled her coat tighter around her body. It was really windy out tonight.

"Rory, hi!" Clara called, running up to hug her. Dean followed close behind, shaking his head.

"Oh – ok!" Rory said, startled. She grinned and hugged her back. "Hey Clara, how you been?"

"Great! I've had two boyfriends since you and Dean broke up," she confided.

Rory kept a serious face. "Wow, two boyfriends. Well, they come and they go, huh?"

"Yeah, I had to dump Billy. He smelled funny," Clara explained.

"Well, who wants a smelly boy," Rory said sympathetically.

"Hi, Rory," Dean interjected.

"Hey," she said with an uncomfortable wave.

"Your dress is really pretty," Clara said.

"Oh, thanks. I came straight from dinner with my grandparents, but these are relatively comfortable shoes," Rory said.

"Yeah, you look great," Dean said appreciatively.

"Um…thanks," Rory said, tucking her hair behind her ears. "So… um… what should we do first?"

"I think Dean should win us some stuffed animals, what do you think?" Clara said.

Rory and Dean shared a grin. "I think that's an excellent idea," she said, linking arms with Clara.

"Step right up, knock off all the bottles and win a prize! Step right up, you might be a winner, just a dollar to play!" Kirk said, calling out to the carnival crowd. "Well, hello there, Dean, would you like to play next to this complete stranger whom I have never seen before in my life?"

Rory looked at Kirk like he was crazy until she saw who he was talking about. It seemed completely out of place, but there was Colin tossing one of his three balls. Rory tried to figure out Kirk's act until she remembered that he organized their LDB scavenger hunt a few weeks back.

"Just one dollar will put you in the game with this complete stranger," Kirk said. Dean gave him a weird look but handed him a dollar, tossing the first ball and knocking down five pins. Meanwhile, Colin had finished throwing his and started to walk away, not having won a prize.

"Um, I'll be right back," Rory said. What was Colin doing here? She followed him.

"Well well well, if it isn't Rory Gilmore. How ya doin, Rory?" Colin said.

"Hey Bill, where's Ted?" Rory asked.

"Off having an excellent adventure without me, I suspect," Colin replied easily, stopping and looking around.

"So what are you doing here?" Rory said casually.

"Well, it's Friday night, and since none of us have dates, we decided to come here and participate in this little small town ritual," Colin explained.

"None of you had dates, hm?" Rory said dubiously. She thought about Logan and that girl and felt the heat creep into her face. She started to walk away.

"Hey, what gives?" Colin asked.

"I'm mad at you. I shouldn't be talking to you," Rory said.

"Mad? Why?" Colin asked.

"I'm mad at you by extension," Rory said.

"Oh yeah, Logan told us you saw-"

"Don't even bring it up if you value your life," Rory warned.

"Now listen, if you'd just let him explain," Colin said.

"I'm not letting him explain anything! I know what I saw!" Rory said.

Just then, Dean and Clara came up, Clara holding an oversized stuffed teddy bear.

"Now excuse me, I have to go be told I'm going to be rich and famous. Come on, Clara." She stomped over to the fortune teller's booth. Clara shrugged and followed her.


"I don't know what Hermione's talking about, Professor Trelawney knows her stuff," Rory joked.

Clara giggled. "Ooh, look at that guy, he's really cute!" she gushed.

Rory looked up. "Who?" Her eyes met Logan's. "Yeah, he is," Rory said carefully. "Tell you what, why don't you go find your brother and get us some popcorn, ok?"

"Ok," Clara said. She tugged on Rory's shirt. "But I think he's really cute, so if you don't want him…" she wagged her eyebrows suggestively.

Rory tried to hide her smirk. "Go!"


"Happy talking talking happy talk…" Lorelai sang, complete with hand puppets.

"Don't you know when to cut her off from the fruity drinks?" Luke said, taking a cup of Miss Patty's punch out of Lorelai's hand and dropping it in the trash can. The server at the punch table just shrugged.

"No! No cutting off! I'm thisclose to Bali H'ai," Lorelai whined.

"Ok, Bloody Mary, time to go home," Luke said, taking her arm and leading her away.

"Come on," Luke said crabbily.

"I'm coming to join you, Elizabeth!" Lorelai said in a gravelly voice.

"Geez," Luke said, rolling his eyes. "You're not gonna have a heart attack. Where's your car?"

"I can't drive home like this!" Lorelai protested. "I've been drinking!"

"Ok, well then we can walk you home," Luke said.

Lorelai returned to her normal voice. "Ok, see, I don't think walking's an option either."

"Well we can't go in the truck," Luke said.

"Why not?" Lorelai said, stumbling over to it and leaning on the hood.

"Because it's broken, or at least I think it is – it's been making some odd noises lately, and I don't wanna take the risk of driving it until I figure out what's wrong," he explained.

"Awwwwwww…." Lorelai said, petting the hood. "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, we still love you," she cooed.

"Stop petting the car," Luke said. "Come on, you're staying here tonight."

"Why, Lucas Danes! Are you takin' advantage of me?" Lorelai said, batting her eyelashes as Luke unlocked the diner.

"No," Luke barked.

"Well why not?" she pouted.

"Ok, you're gonna need lots of water," Luke said, pushing her through the door.


"Rory, I've been trying to call you all day," Logan said, walking up to her.

"I turned my phone off," Rory said frostily.

"Please, let me explain," Logan pleaded.

"I don't want to hear any of your explanations. I know what I saw, and I know I don't ever want to see you again!" she said, trying to keep her eyes from welling up with tears.

"Ace, come on, do you really think I would screw this up?" Logan said, gesturing to the space between him and Rory. "You know I wouldn't."

"I don't know what I know anymore," Rory said, defeated.

"You know what? I think you're scared. I think you're scared to trust me," Logan said.

"So what if I am?" she countered. "It's only logical. Now please, just go away," Rory said, pushing past Logan, walking as fast as she could.

"Dammit!" Logan said to noone. He stood there. There was only one way to make Rory understand. He pulled out his cell phone.


"You ok, Rory?" Dean asked as Rory downed another cup of Patty's punch.

"I'm fine," she said with false enthusiasm. "What's next?"

"I bet I know what's wrong with her," Clara said slyly, eating a piece of popcorn. "I bet it was that boy. He made her mad."

"Who wants to get cotton candy, huh?" Rory said, raising her hand.

"What boy?" Dean asked, worrying that it was who he thought it was.

"Nobody," Rory said, putting her hand down. "How about a corn dog?" She raised it again.

"He was really cute," Clara said. "He was all dressed up like Rory and had blond hair, kind of spiky."

"How about a caramel apple? What's a winter festival without a caramel apple?" Rory said desperately.

"Rory," Dean said, taking her by the shoulders. "Was Logan here?" he asked seriously.

Rory shrugged. "Maybe," she said, taking another sip of punch.

"And is that why you're drowning your sorrows in some 100 proof punch? You might as well be drinking kerosene!"

"I'm not drowning my sorrows!" Rory threw away her cup as if to prove a point.

"That guy at the booth… he was one of his rich little friends, wasn't he?" Dean said, suddenly remembering Colin's face.

"Can we not talk about this?" Rory said.

"Hey, I see Amy. Can I go hang out with my friends for awhile?" Clara asked Dean.

"Yeah, sure," Dean said distractedly.

"See you later, Rory," Clara said, skipping over to join her group of friends.

"I knew he would hurt you," Dean said. "What happened?"

"Nothing happened, we're just not together, that's all. Can we drop it?" Rory said vehemently.

"Sure. You know, that's not you. You're not one of them, not really. You're as much a part of this town as I am," Dean insisted.

"Yeah, I guess so," Rory said. Her head was pounding. She sank down onto the nearest bench. Dean sat down next to her.

"You know, I've been thinking," Dean said slowly, gauging her reaction.

"What?" Rory said, putting a hand to her forehead.

"Well," Dean said, "maybe all this happened for a reason. Maybe the universe is just trying to tell us to stop running from each other. We belong together, Rory."

"Dean, I can't do this right now," Rory said tiredly.

"Do what? Rory, don't you see? We're supposed to be together."

Rory just shook her head. "No, Dean. We have a past, but we don't have a present, and I certainly don't think we have a future."

"Well," Dean said, "why don't you at least give it a try, hm?" He leaned closer to kiss her.

Rory turned her head away. "Dean, stop!"

"Come on, Rory," Dean said, kissing her jaw and trying to turn her face toward his. "You know you want to," he said, trying again to kiss her.

"Dean, no!" Rory said, trying to push him off of her. Dean, however, was stronger, and kept pushing.

"Come on, Rory," he mumbled.

"Stop!" she said, bordering on hysteria.

"The lady said stop, mate. Now I kindly suggest you remove yourself from her person," a voice said from above.

"Finn!" Rory cried in relief. Never in her life was she so happy to see him as she was in that moment.

"I don't really think this is any of your business," Dean said threateningly.

"See, that's where you're wrong, mate. Rory is my business."

"Geez, Rory, how many of these guys did you date?" Dean said incredulously.

"Dean!" she said in astonishment.

"Rory's a dear friend of mine; many is the time that she has prescribed excellent hangover food, and she's my best mate's girl, so I suggest you get your bloody hands off of her."

"Oh yeah? Well I don't see him anywhere," Dean said threateningly. "And what exactly are you gonna do about it?"

"What am I going to do? I think you meant to ask 'what are we going to do,'" Finn said. Colin and Robert and Logan stepped up.

"You guys are seriously going to beat me up? What are we, in high school?" Dean sneered, standing up to face them.

"Stay cool, boy," Finn said.

"Um, Finn, now's not the time, unless you wanna involve a real life Officer Krupke," Rory said, slipping off the bench.

"Get behind me, Rory," Logan said.

"Oh please," Rory said, rolling her eyes.

"Guys," Logan said, never taking his eyes off Dean, "take Rory; this is between me and him."

"Are you sure?" Colin asked.

"Yeah, go," Logan said.

"Logan, don't," Rory pleaded as Finn put his arm around her shoulders.

"We're just gonna talk, right Dean?" Logan said.

"Sure. Talk," Dean said sarcastically.

Rory reluctantly let the guys lead her away.

"Look, man, I don't know what you did, but I'm pretty sure you've ruined your chances with Rory, that is, if you ever had any," Dean said. "So you might as well let her come crawling back to me."

"I beg to differ," Logan said. "In fact, I'd say the chances of me and Rory living happily ever after are pretty good right now; at least they would be if you'd leave her alone," he said threateningly.

"Oh, afraid of a little competition, huh? Rory and I have a history, one which you'll never be a part of, and I think you just can't handle it. I mean, you can't mean that much to her if you haven't slept together yet," Dean scoffed.

"You know, I'm getting a little tired of this," Logan said, his blood pressure rising. "I mean, I know it's just sheer delusion on your part, but I gotta wonder why you're so interested in our sex life," he asked pointedly, advancing on Dean.

Dean took a step forward. "Well I would be interested…if you had one," he sneered.

"I've told you once before, and I'll tell you again… what Rory and I do is our business, and nobody else's," Logan said, his face mere inches away from Dean's. "And I'd really appreciate it if you'd stop bothering her."

"Or what?" Dean said.

"Or what?" Logan repeated.

"Yeah, or what? Daddy's gonna pay me off?" Dean said derisively.

"No, you'll be dealing with me personally," Logan said in a low voice.

"You wanna punch me? Go right ahead," Dean goaded.

"Oh, believe me, I really wanna punch you. I'm imagining at least twelve different ways to inflict pain on you," Logan said.

"Only twelve?" Dean growled.

"Fourteen now, but who's counting?" Logan said. "But you know what? I'm not going to."

"Why, you chicken?" Dean taunted.

"No, I'm just going to keep you waiting. Because I can guarantee that something infinitely worse than punching you will occur if you come near her again. You got me, partner?" Logan said quietly.

"Oh, I got you, but this ain't over," Dean said.

"Well if that's the case, don't say I didn't warn you," Logan said. He turned around and walked away.


"Just let me go to the bathroom, please!" Rory said.

"No way! You're gonna run," Colin said.

"I'm not gonna run. Tell him I'm not gonna run, Finn," Rory pleaded.

"Oh, she's gonna run," Finn confirmed.

"Ugh!" Rory said, putting her head in her hands.

"Oh, heads up, here comes Huntz," Colin said. "And he's got backup."

Rory looked up. "No way, I am outta here," she said.

"Just wait a moment, hm?" Finn said gently.

"Guys, I can take it from here," Logan said.

"Alright, we'll catch ya tomorrow. Come on, Finn," Colin said.

"Look, Logan –" Rory started.

"Rory," Logan said, "I'd like to introduce you to my sister and her fiancée."

"Your…your sister!" Rory said.

"Hi, I'm Honor. This is Josh. It's so great to meet you – Logan's told me so much about you," Honor said, shaking Rory's hand.

"Um… funny, Logan's told me nothing about you," Rory said, giving Logan a playful pointed look, relief evident in her eyes.

"Well, we'll let you get back to your carnival… this is so cute! Wanna go play some midway games, Josh?" Honor asked.

"Sure," Josh said warmly. "See you guys later!" he said with a wave. That left Rory and Logan standing there alone.

"So…" Logan said.

"So…" Rory said sheepishly.

"Are we…ok?" Logan asked tentatively.

"Yeah. I'm sorry I jumped to conclusions," Rory said, blushing from embarrassment.

"It's understandable," Logan allowed. They stood there for a moment. "So…" Logan said, tracing circles in the dirt with the toe of his shoe. "We still have two nights left, right?" he said with a smirk.

Rory broke out into a smile. "Yeah, two nights," she said. He opened his arms for a hug, and Rory gladly stepped in.

"You know," Logan said when they pulled away, "I should really add a night or two for pain and suffering."

"For mental anguish?" Rory teased.

"Yeah," Logan laughed. "So, you spending the night tonight?" he asked.

"I have to; I have a bet to fulfill," she said.

"Good. Just so you know, I'm spending the night in Paris," he said, walking away.

"Logan," Rory said. She watched in dismay as he kept walking. "Logan!" she called. "We can't just go to Europe!"

Logan turned around and started walking backwards. "Sure we can, Ace!" He turned around and kept walking.

"No we can't! We have class on Monday, we have homework to do before then…" she said, trailing after him.

"So do you homework on the plane! Personally, I'm going to sleep. I mean, it's seven hours, you know."

"I don't even have my passport!" she cried. "Do you have your passport?" she asked accusingly.

"Yes," he answered calmly. "I keep it with me at all times, you know, just in case. Why, where do you keep yours?" he asked innocently.

"In my bedside drawer," Rory said.

"Well, good thing we're about a block from your house," Logan said.

"Just in case," Rory said under her breath, shaking her head.

Logan stopped a few feet ahead of her. "You comin'?" he asked, holding out his hand.

Rory sighed. "I must be crazy," she said.

"What was that?" Logan asked, putting his hand to his ear.

"Lead the way, Jeeves," she said, placing her hand in his, resigned to her fate.

Logan whooped. "Alright, let's go. You can pack in ten minutes, right?"

"Yeah, right, and Spicoli's a Mensa candidate," Rory said rolling her eyes. She grinned as they hurried to her house.


Alright, so just like "I Love Lucy," our story is goin' to Europe! Let me just say, I have such cute ideas for this weekend trip. But, should you want, in your reviews, suggest places for them to go, or things for them to do. So come on, review already!