A/N: Hey! I'm here again! YAY! Here is the new chapter you all asked for!
Disclaimer: You know what I mean…I don't own HP, Teletubbies, Barney, General Hospital or any other show I mention.
Chapter 5: Damn Muggle Box!
"How the hell does this work!" Hermione groaned, she was in the middle of grading a student's work online and she couldn't concentrate with her guest hanging around. She got up and headed towards the living room.
"What did you break? "
"I don't think I broke anything! You said this candy bar shaped thing makes this box work! It's not working!" Hermione rolled her eyes and took the remote from him and turned on the TV.
"These two buttons control how loud it is and these two switch channels, so you can browse and watch what you like. Have fun, now I have a student's assignment to grade." Hermione walked out of the room leaving Draco nothing to do but sit in a chair and flip through the channels.
"Holy crap!" He nearly fell out of his chair, when he got to a channel. He could not believe it, there were four creatures on the screen – he had never seen anything like it. There was a Purple tall creature with a triangle on his head singing 'Tinkle – winkle – tinky- winky' carrying a purse and a Green one wearing a hat that had black and white spots, and a yellow creature with an orange ball and a tiny read one riding a weird muggle device that you pushed with your feet. They talked in a weird language saying 'Eh – oh!' all the time! Who are these muggles? They're mentally insane! He continued watching it- insane muggles are funny.
Hermione noticed things were getting quiet. Oh crap she thought, He could be dead or something! She got out of her chair and ran to the living room. Draco was staring at the TV, now the show that's on has a big purple dinosaur in it with lots of kid muggles singing and playing.
"Draco, what are you doing?"
"These shows are insane but pretty good. See, first I was watching a show called Telebubbies, there is Dinky- Finky who is gay, and apparently has a bathroom problem- he keeps saying he has to tinkle- but he never does! Stitsy is the green one, who thinks he's a drum and apparently has a crush on BaBa, who is the yellow one and plays with a ball, and then Poop is the red one who rides this thing and is mentally insane! And all of them don't speak English! Quite entertaining though. Then the next show was about this purple dinosaur named Horney, and he sings songs and stuff to kids to teach them to be safe and minding their manners and stuff… What Muggles comes up with these ideas! They're good! Granger?" Hermione was rolling on the floor laughing so hard she's hugging her sides!
"Granger what has gotten into you?"
"…Malfoy… Those shows… Are Kid Shows!"
"Say what?"
"They are for little kids." Said Hermione regaining her composure " That first show is called Teletubbies, and Tinky- Winky is not gay- just gender confused, and Dipsy is not a drum, LaLa, -well you are right with her, and Po – NOT POOP, rides a scooter – which is the thingy that you see her riding. You are right about the language though, and the next show is called Barney,"
"Oh, well these shows don't seem like they're for kids…. Dinky- Finky is still gay…" Hermione rolled her eyes,
"Look, if you wanna watch something watch this," Hermione changed the channel to ABC where General Hospital was just starting.
"What's this,"
"It's a soap,"
"Ok… Granger, I think you're losing it, this is not a bathroom supply…"
"No, it's a Soap Opera, long story, just a long time ago… When women couldn't work, they cleaned the house and stuff, they were bored, and they had these shows and all the commercial breaks were for soap products for cleaning, see so it's a show women watch – and men too these days, it's al about drama, see you can tell what's gonna happen next, and every one is getting murdered or divorced, or married, or pregnant. All kinds of drama I think you'll like this."
"Ok… What ever," Hermione left Draco to watch the soap, within minutes Draco was really into it,
"NO SONNY DON'T DO THAT! HE'S GONNA TRY TO KILL YOU! IDIOT!"
"COURTNEY…. NO DON'T DIE! #Sniff# NOOOOOO!" Hermione really couldn't concentrate now, (I don't watch soaps, my parents do… and I over hear a lot of stuff in the shows – but my parents don't act like Draco – thank heavens)
"At least he was quiet watching those kid shows." She told herself, and trudged back to the living room.
"I think I'll put Comfy Couch on instead,"
"But… It was getting good – well ok, go ahead, it's over anyway… bloody cliffhangers…" Hermione left Draco to his kiddy shows then she looked at the clock, dinner… Great. She walked to the kitchen, opened the fridge, nothing. Hermione, you were at a store today and you didn't get any FOOD? I'll just have to think of something else.'
'Draco, there isn't any food in the kitchen, so what kind of food are you interested in? We could get pizza, or go to Olive Garden or something."
"What's pizza?"
"You don't know what pizza is? Have you ever eaten Italian?"
"All the time – but it's mainly pasta and salad."
"We're getting Pizza then, I'm calling Little Caesars," Hermione left the room, grabbed the phone, and dialed the number.
"I'd like to order 2 large Big and Greasy's and a 2 liter of Coke, please." (I LOVE little Caesars, I don't think they have any in London, but it's my fic and I want a little Caesars there – so don't bug me about it!) "Thank you, I'll be there in 20 minutes," Hermione hung up.
"Come on Draco, we have pizza to pick up."
"Do I have to ride in the car again?"
"Yes, I'm not going to leave you home alone when you still can't use any thing in here! Some of this stuff is expensive! Come on!"
"But I'll get sick again!"
"Oh for Pete's sake! You ride a bloody broom you can't get car -sick! Now come on!" She grabbed the collar of his shirt and dragged him out side. Soon they picked up the order and went back into the house.
"Doesn't it smell good?" asked Hermione taking the boxes of pizza in,
"Yeah, this doesn't look appetizing though," said Draco carrying the coke.
"Don't worry it's better than it looks," said Hermione, she took the food to the living room, got some cups and poured some coke into each.
"How about we watch a movie?"
"A what?"
"On the TV, Pride and Prejudice is on in five minutes – perfect timing."
"I still don't know what a movie is!"
"A long show on TV,"
"Oh,"
"Try your first slice of Pizza," Hermione handed a glass of coke to him, flipped to the channel that the movie was going to be on.
"This is delicious!"
"Isn't it? It's my favorite food ever!"
"I think I'll have to agree with you there." Said Draco taking another slice.
"Have some coke with it."
"Ok…Hey, it's pretty good too…"
"Shh! The movie is starting,"
4 hours later… The movie was finally over, the pizza and coke was gone to the last crumb/drop and Draco and Hermione were stuffed.
"I love that movie," said Hermione, "I just love that Lizzie and Mr. Darcy hated each other, then they fell in love, so sweet."
"It was ok, a little long but ok."
"I can't eat another bite,"
"Well technically that's good, cause there isn't any more pizza,"
"Good point,"
"I call first shower," (both of them showered at night)
"No fair, I introduced you to pizza and –" she stood up regretting it "On second thought, you shower first, my stomach needs to settle – just don't take all the hot water."
"Ok," said Draco getting up. When he left she cleaned everything with her wand and read a book.
A/N: Like it? Review! If you review you get a cookie!
Shelb
