Chapter 5

The small white aircraft was spiraling out of control and Don knew he had to push the pedal that controlled the rudder with his left foot, but he couldn't move. He heard his father's voice coming from the passenger's seat. "Damn it, Don, just push that pedal! What is wrong with you?" He turned to look at his father who dissolved into Professor Robinson commanding "Just do it, Don!"

"Don? Don!"

Two strong hands held his shoulders in place. Don's eyes flew open and he stared at a concerned face floating above him. He was disconcerted for a moment, because he wasn't sure if he was looking at John or his own father.

He heard John's voice, which helped to reorient him. "You were having a nightmare. Are you okay?"

Don shook the sleep from his head and muttered, "Yeah."

John pulled a chair next to the bed and Don sighed. He saw that John had his "let's talk" expression and he was in no mood to comply.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"About what?"

"Your nightmare."

"No."

"Okay. We do have to talk about your condition."

"My condition?" Don gave a rueful laugh. "I'm paralyzed. What else is there to talk about?"

Determined to hold onto his patience, John continued. "You have spinal damage, but your spinal cord wasn't severed. That means the paralysis might not be permanent."

"So, what, are we talking a few weeks, months?"

"We'll know in twelve to eighteen months."

"A year and a half?"

"Maybe less with some luck."

"Luck?" Don couldn't keep the sarcasm from his voice. "Somehow, John, I don't feel so lucky."

"Don, you might recover some if not all of your functions within a year."

"My 'functions'?" Hearing that word caused Don to lose the tentative hold he had on his emotions.

"Yes, your bodily functions below your waist."

"So I tell Judy to just wait and be patient until I can walk, shit, and fuck again?"

John's face reddened in anger and he whispered through clenched teeth, "Don't you ever use that word in my presence again, Major. You are referring to my daughter. I'll not tolerate you disrespecting her… ever!"

Don's face paled when he realized how John had taken his comment. He had no intention of disrespecting Judy. "I'm, I'm sorry, John. I didn't mean to… I just…" His eyes filled with tears and he turned away.

John's demeanor softened. "You asked her to marry you and she said 'yes'. That should be enough to keep you going."

"It's not that simple."

"Yes, it is that simple. I know. I married the love of my life, and she has been the one thing that I could always depend upon when everything else was falling apart."

Don turned back to him and stared. "No, John. You can't know. You've made love to Maureen for over 20 years. Judy and I haven't even had one chance to…"

A knock on the door interrupted their conversation. Maureen entered with a tray of food. She could feel tension in the room and wished she had more to offer than just food. "Come on, Don, time to get some nourishment."

"No, thanks, Maureen, I'm not hungry."

"Hungry or not, you need to eat something. I won't take 'no' for an answer."

Don knew when he couldn't win. She pushed the button to raise the upper part of the bed. He accepted the tray, but mostly played with the food as he did his best to keep his emotions under control.

Maureen delivered a message for him. "Judy wants to see you, Don,"

He stabbed at his food and didn't reply.

"What should I tell her?"

His face clouded as he struggled to maintain a grip on his feelings.

"Don?"

"I don't know, Maureen. Tell her… Tell her I'll let her know when I'm ready."

"You know she loves you. She needs to be with you."

He was barely holding onto his sanity. He so wanted to throw the tray against the wall and tell them all to go "f-" themselves. Instead, he only threw his fork and exclaimed, "I know!" He rubbed his eyes and apologized, "I'm sorry... I just can't be with her right now."

Maureen sighed and caught John's eye. They were both unhappy, but had no other choice than to accept his pronouncement.

"Alright, Don. If that's what you want, I'll let it go for now."


The tray had been cleared and John performed the necessary procedures so that Don could sleep comfortably through the night. John stated, "I'll check on you later," as he left the room.

Don had been turned on his side, facing away from the door, and he felt even more vulnerable than he had earlier in the day. He drifted in and out of sleep and thought he heard comings and goings and whisperings in the room, but he was never awake enough to know what was happening. He guessed that he had been given a sedative in his IV and told himself to make sure that wasn't done again.

He felt as if he were drifting in a sea of blackness, his mind never settling on a coherent thought. At one point he felt a light touch on his cheek and warm pressure on his arm, but he couldn't tell if it was real or his imagination.

The air was warm and a delicate breeze caressed their bodies. They were lying in a field of soft blue grass, surrounded by tall fragrant flowers. Her golden hair billowed like a halo around her face. Her clear blue eyes looked deeply into his and he felt as if a tether was holding her to his soul. His eyes asked for permission and she nodded. He moved his body closer and her warmth welcomed him as she whispered his name. They clung together until gasps of pleasure left their lips. Embraced in love, they truly had become one.


The rustling of movement in the doorway and whispered voices greeted him as he slowly came to wakefulness. "Judy?" he called, but it was Maureen who was standing nearby.

She could see that he wore a contented smile, and she hoped that today would be the start of his recovery. "It's me, Don. Should I get Judy for you?"

He opened his eyes and tried to turn onto his back, but his smile faded as reality returned. "No. I, I guess I was just dreaming." A haunted look settled over his face as Maureen helped him get into position to eat the breakfast she had brought him.

"It must have been a good dream. You had such a wonderful smile on your face."

He nibbled at the toast and avoided her eyes.

Accepting his avoidance as a change of topic, Maureen ventured, "Don, we've come up with a rehabilitation plan. Dr. Smith and John will be in soon to go over it with you."

"Will rehabilitation restore my, uh, bodily functions?"

"Well, there's no guarantee, but the sooner you start, the better your chances. The children even want to help."

He cringed at the idea of Will and Penny being involved. The last thing he wanted was anyone seeing him helpless. "I don't think I'll need any help."

"Oh, Don. It would be so good for them. It might help them get over their guilt about what happened to you."

'Great, another thing to feel bad about.'

"Well, think about it. They don't need to help out right away. See how it goes. I'm going to check on Judy. Is there anything you want me to tell her?"

'Tell her I love her,' he wanted to say, but he simply shook his head.

Maureen was disappointed that he still wasn't ready to face her daughter. "You can't keep her away forever, Don. I'll come back later for the tray."

'You're a coward, West,' he thought to himself as he watched Maureen close the door behind her.