"The Adventures of Professor Proton, Jr: The Proton Express…"
Summary: In my first longer Proton Jr tale, can Prof Proton Jr. aka mild-mannered Sheldon Cooper and Dr. Amy aka Amy F. Fowler save the world at Christmas…And can Proton Jr. keep that blond sob of an engineering genius Tom Swift, Jr. away from his girl?
Equally important…Should Cameragirl Penny allow this thing to appear on her acting credits or just accept that all hope of a professional career is gone and just enjoy while peddling her drugs?
[For those curious about the Tom Swift adventures, of course much of this is taken from "Tom Swift and His Diving Seacopter", one of the best books in the series which got me into science long, long, long ago.]
Disclaimer: All is Chuck's…
Part XXVI…
"So splashdown in eight hours?" Bernadette asked Bud as they sat in the Arturo control cabin.
"According to the space prober and Proton's estimates via his dark matter detector, yeah." Bud nodded, eyeing controls.
"And we'll get there with at least five hours to spare…Probably six." she frowned at the controls.
"Less, we go down in about an hour…I'd say at full underwater speed we'll have about three hours. But in any case we'll want to be in position, you know. Tom can't be sure Wyckliffe's new coordinates put the ship at the old alien site precisely, it's just his best guess."
"I suppose." She sighed.
"Eager for a crack at the contents are we?" he grinned.
"You know it…" she smiled. "Bud, this could make my career…The first alien life studied by Humanity."
"Or end it…And all Humanity if we don't get this right." He noted. "Not meaning you, sweetie." To her look.
All the Swift girls at least take after their dad in that respect…They've all got a bit of his terrifying glare down pat. Sandy's the same way, he thought.
"I know you're as ready as anyone can be…" he concluded, a bit lamely.
"That's just it…" she shrugged. "Who can be…? Bud, you're right. If we screw this…"
"Well, Tom will have the UN team right in…"
"But if Wyckcliffe gets the chance to crack the thing open…"
"She wouldn't do that…She can't be that crazy. She wants it intact."
"She may…I dunno about her crazy brother." Bernadette shook head. "I know we all thought he was just out for money and maybe he is but…He murdered poor Dr. Hofstadter."
"Maybe he just is…Out for money here…The doc just got in his way. In any case, we're still hoping to reach it first."
"I know…I'm just worried. Plus…" wry smile. "This is the first time Tom's put a big chunk of one of his expeditions on me. I'm used to just reviewing the stuff he brings back…"
"And listening to us go on about our latest adventure…I know." Bud smiled. "But I'm glad you got to go on this one. Probably the best of all."
"Glad to be here…Though make sure you get me home safe. You know Dad."
"I know." Mock panic. "And that look of panic isn't entirely kidding."
"It shouldn't be."
"But Tom's robot won't let us down…The earlier boys never have."
"Yeah…Though I kinda wish."
"No way." Bud sternly. "You are not going in…Sermek is the man…Person…Er bot…For this job."
"We can't be sure even Sermek can handle what's in there. It may take a human." She noted.
"Tom and I are agreed that no one is going in, not even the UN, unless we can confirm it's safe." He frowned. "Above all, I specified you."
"Bud." Frown. "Have I ever stopped you from going into danger?"
"You try every time." He noted, firmly.
"And I never succeed. It's my turn…Play fair. Or I'll tell Dad." Grin.
"He'll be with me on this one."
Damn, he will…She thought.
"But if Sermek fails or can't cope…"
"Then we seal the thing and wait for Tom to come up with something."
"But if I could…"
"Bernadette, no way…I don't care if Tom invents the ultimate repelatron biosuit. You are not going inside. You'll win your Nobel from the outside looking via video."
"I was thinkin' more a Fat Man suit." She smiled.
He leaned over…Shaking head. "If Tom decides a human has to go in, it'll be me or him…"
"I'm the micro- and exo- biologist here." She glared. "My expertise could be crucial."
"And you can guide me every step of the way…Though preferably you'll be guiding Sermek. C'mon, Bernie. I've no desire to play hero here, nor does Tom. You shouldn't either."
"Tom already approved me to go." She eyed him.
"What?!" he rose suddenly.
"It's the logical choice, Bud. But only if Sermek fails."
"Tom! Get in here!" he pressed microphone of the main intercom. "Tom?!"
"What's up? I'm with Proton…" Swift's voice on intercom.
That alone is startling news…Bernadette thought, smiling a bit.
"Did you approve Bernie to go into the ship? If Sermek fails?"
Pause…
Long pause…
"Tom…" Bernadette, sternly.
"Bud…She is our sole micro- and exo-biologist." Tom's voice, apologetic.
"Because the other one we had was murdered!" Bud noted, grimly.
"Bernadette is the best person to analyze the stuff. From her lab if Sermek manages it. From inside if he can't."
"If your giant, radiation proof robot that can function inside an atomic pile…"
"It might be something else, maybe just a matter of judgment, Bud." Tom's voice as Bernadette took Bud's hand in hers.
"C'mon Bud…I probably won't have to go and it'll be a Swift piece of cake if I do." She smiled, squeezing his hand.
"I'll only let her go in if we're sure her suit can handle it and there's a real need." Tom noted.
"Maureen Robinson I am not." Bernadette smiled. "I've no intention of sitting around cleaning the ship or cooking, you know." She eyed Bud. "It's my job, Bud. Like you have yours."
"You might have told me you discussed this with that idiot pal of mine…Barclay out, by the way…." Bud cut off the intercom…As an annoyed Bernadette began "We're discuss…"
"Guess I should've mentioned it to Bud…" Tom to Proton as they reviewed dark matter data in the opposing Suboro cabin.
"I certainly would've…" Proton, rather smugly. "Right, Amy?" to the sour Amy beside him.
"Are you joking?" she eyed him with frown. "And I want in if Bernadette's going. I'm a biologist too."
"Neuro…Hardly matters which biologist, I know but…" Proton noted.
"Arthur." Cold tone.
("Scares me when she calls me 'Arthur' like that." Sheldon noted to Leonard. "Exactly." Leonard beamed.)
"Hey, Bernadette." Dr. Amy clicked microphone. "You've got a partner for the probe into the ship…!"
"Only if Sermek fails!" Bud's desperate cry.
"Sermek? Who's Sermek?" Proton stared. Amy still on intercom but curious.
"Oh, right…You haven't met." Tom nodded. "I just brought him out of the cargo bay in the rotor section and left him in the spare cabin. Hey, Sermek!" He went to the cabin door, opening.
"Two steps forward, my mechanical friend." He called. Proton eyeing Amy. Both eyeing the eight foot tall…Somewhat humanoid…Robot emerging from the cabin.
"It's a B-9…" Proton gasped.
"A fully functional B-9." Swift grinned. "Obviously I had help from Irwin Allen in the design but the B-9 design turned out to be perfect for…"
"All systems now active, Tom." The robot swung to face Proton.
"Warning! Warning!" flail of arms. "Proton in the building!"
"Very funny." Dark look from Proton. "And your sister's voice?"
(Howard, arch look to Raj…Bernadette grinning.
"This means we spend the rest of the afternoon playing with your new toy, doesn't it?" Penny in Commander Putinsky's uniform eyeing Leonard.
"No, I already did last night with Howard when we tested his model…" Leonard smiled. "It means while the others…" eyeing Wil Wheaton gasping as he played with the working B-9 arms. "…play with Sermek, I see if I can seduce a stern Russian subcommander."
"Uh-huh…" Penny frowned. "Ok, you had me at 'I already did…', comrade. Come on before you start playing…" The two hurrying off…
"Hey, be careful with that unif…" Howard tried as they raced off… "I'll cover the dry cleaning and I'll probably buy it anyway…" Penny called.
"You built this? This is so cool…" Wil, to Howard as he regarded the blinking, swiveling robot. "I suggested Data be a B-9 back on Trek and then I tried to get a B-9 on 'Eureka' but both times the writers looked at me like I was nuts."
"Oh, my God…" Voice of God emanating… "Is that the Lost in Space B-9? I loved that thing." Mr. Jones stepping over from where he'd just entered the set, to see.
"Tell me it keels over when you pull the power pack?" Wil, eagerly.
"Of course…" Howard, pulling power pack, the B-9 keeling…Unnnnhhh…Arms drooping.
"Does it have to sound like Mrs. Wolowitz when it does that?" Sheldon frowned.
"What?" Bernadette stared.
"Wolowitz? You got it going?" Lesley, entering the set area from the rear storage area she'd gone to, to find…Uh…Something…Fumbling a bit at hair and clothes…Barry in tow.
"Oh, cool…" Barry beaming happily.)
