A/N: Let's get right into it, shall we? Alright. Don't own anything, etc. So on, and so forth.

Chapter 26: Forward Motion

It was difficult to say who was more shocked; James, Sirius, Gretchen, Lilly, or the whole of Hogwarts. The Great Hall was silent as Gretchen sat at Ravenclaw with Peter Davies, his arm possessively around her waist and his eyes drifting somewhere below her neckline and Lilly sat completely on her own. For once, Sirius' hair was far from perfect and James looked ragged from lack of sleep.

What had happened to their golden couple? Lilly looked dreadfully pale, her hair a mess in straggling red tendrils. Everyone stared, the only sound being Peter Pettigrew masticating on a piece of toast.

"There is nothing to see here," Remus stated quietly, voicing resonating through the hall, "Please carry on with your own business."

As the noise slow picked up to its usual dull roar, Tabitha asked softly "What happened?"

"I told her I loved her"

Peter's mangled toast dropped from his hands. Sirius blinked, and looked his friend straight in the eye.

"I take it that it didn't go quite as planned?"

"She said she couldn't. What does that even mean?"

"Eh. Good riddance, I say. Who needs her?" Peter said, ignoring the evils being directed at him from Alice and Tabitha.

"I need her." James said quietly, staring blankly at his eggs while pushing them about dejectedly with his fork.

Lilly stood quietly, walking softly toward the doors, regarding the floor as she went. As she passed him, she looked up, catching James' eye. She stood like a deer in headlights, trapped by his gaze, before looking down and exiting as quickly as her dignity would allow, leaving James to stab moodily at his eggs, as Remus and Tabitha shook their heads sadly.

That night, for the first time in a month, Lilly's restless sleep was shattered by hoarse screams. Sitting bolt upright in bed, she did not think twice before swiftly leaving her room and entering James'.

He thrashed about in bed, his sheets tangled around him. She stood near his bed, watching him pant softly, tears silently slipping down his face. His raven hair stood on end, pulled by his hands away from his pain ravaged face. She danced slightly on the balls of her feet, wondering what she should do. Then, still in his dream world, his arm reached out for her. Grasping his hand, she perched on his bed. Softly kissing away his tears, she murmured quietly, calming him as best she could. His eyes blearily opened for a moment. Gasping softly, she quietly moved away until she was hidden by the shadows just outside his door.

"Lilly?" she heard him groggily whisper.

Denying all her instincts and desires, she slipped back into her own bed, failing to hear his conversation into a mirror as she cried herself to sleep.

"I don't know, Padfoot. It was like she was suddenly there. She came, and I could breathe again."

That Saturday, Sirius sat in the courtyard, stonily staring down as Peter Davies waited for Gretchen. He stood slowly as Gretchen walked past him to Peter. As she was pulled along by the arm towards Hogsmeade, Sirius felt a warm hand clap against his right shoulder, and a sudden warmth behind his left. Looking to his right, he saw James smile reassuringly at him, with Remus looking off into the distance.

"Where's Peter?" he asked quietly, returning his gaze to Gretchen as she walked down the path.

"Who knows, these days?" James replied, shrugging.

Gretchen turned, looking over her shoulder. Sirius stood, flanked by his friends, face cold as he watched her descend. She sighed softly, before being jerked around again by Peter.

He watched her look back at him, sighing, before he began to trudge down the path himself.

The following week was the longest any of the seventh year Gryffindors had ever known. Tension was building up between the Slytherins and Gryffindors due to the Quidditch final coming the next Saturday.

Lilly dragged herself through each class, taking copious notes in preparation for the NEWTS, beginning that Wednesday.

On Tuesday night, she sat in the middle of a mountain of notes, desperately doing every spell she knew. As she felt a bout of hysteria creeping up at her failure to turn a teacup into a mouse, she recognized a calming presence behind her. A large, slightly tanned, calloused hand covered her own white one, the hand holding her wand, as a deep voice said,

"You get all worked up like that; you'll set your notes on fire. It's already sweltering in here. Don't worry, Lilly. You'll be fine. You're the smartest witch I know."

Cool lips brushed the warm skin of her exposed neck and then, as soon as it appeared, the calming presence was gone, leaving her alone with her notes and a racing heart.

As expected, the NEWTS passed without major incident, minus Gretchen's refusal to chart any constellation with the word "Sirius" in it. Finally, Saturday morning dawned bright and early.

Standing at the crest of the hill, Lilly gazed over the Quidditch Pitch. She wanted to go, but she didn't want to watch at the same time. Torn with indecision, she stared out at the horizon and the rising sun.

'One step at a time, Lilly-girl,' she thought, hearing her mother's voice in her head, 'you just need some forward motion, just one step at a time.'

Squaring her shoulders, Lilly tilted her chin up defiantly, tossed her hair, and showed the first sign of spirit in two weeks as she marched down the grassy slope toward the pitch.