By: Prodigus Feldspar

Two chapters already completed! I feel so special! But I'm not sure how long I'll be to make this fic. Oh well!

Also, I'm sorry for not writing for a while. My cousins are moving and they had to sleep at my house. I had no time to go on the computer. Also, I'll be going on vacation for a week, so I'll write when I can.

Thanks so much for the reviews! 3 (I got called prodigus feldspar-sama! SQUEE!)

I'm glad you all like it. I'm hoping to reveal the stalker in this chapter….hopefully…shifty eyes

Note: I felt like adding more characters…and I needed a full moon pun (So "Flex" (Taisa) would read it huggles Richard plushie MUAAHHA.).Neji and Tenten had to come into the story, if only briefly. Btw, THE FMWS DUB CAN DIE!

Also…In case all you sane people out there are wondering "The noodle dance" Was from some kids show I can't quite remember. The main characters are three otters, one named Peanut, one named Butter, and one named Jelly (who was purple…) I just randomly thought of it. (Gimme a break it's midnight!) Yeah…enjoy.

000

Temari searched the house.

"Gaara! Are you here?" She yelled.

Where could he be? Kankuro is off somewhere training and it's not like he has any friends to go hang out with. Well, there is that scary kid with the freaky hair, but Gaara never hangs out with him.

She heard the door open.

000

Gaara opened the door slowly and peered inside, hoping Temari wasn't awake yet.

"GAARA! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?"

Oh, no…

Temari flew through the doorway to the living room and froze at the sight of Gaara standing in the doorway to the house.

"Gaara…What…?" Temari stood in the living room, gawking at Gaara's appearance.

"Looks like we have a lot of explaining to do!" Lee chimed in and stood next to Gaara.

"Gaara…" Temari said slowly,"WHY THE HELL IS YOUR FREAKY LITTLE FRIEND WEARING MY CLOTHES!"

"Huh?" Gaara said, dumbfounded.

"I am NOT freaky!" Lee protested.

Gaara stepped in front of Lee. "Temari! Haven't you realized I've turned into a woman?"

Temari looked at him, "I know, but my clothes are more important than your sex change!" She began advancing towards Lee threateningly.

"I DIDN'T GET A SEX CHANGE!" Gaara shouted.

Temari stared at him. "So how did that happen?"

"He just woke up like that." Lee said matter-of-factly and was shot a glare from Temari.

"So," Temari said, looking Gaara up and down, "You didn't do anything to make anyone want revenge did you?"

"I don't think so…" Gaara said thoughtfully. "And if I did piss someone off, who could be able to do this?"

They all looked at the ceiling thoughtfully for a moment.

"How about-"Lee began. "No." Gaara said. "NOT the noodle dance."

Lee sighed.

Ding dong!

Temari and Lee looked at Gaara.

"Fine," He huffed, "I'll get it."

Gaara opened the door to a blonde postman with a small cardboard box.

"I have a package for Mrs. Nagasaki. Is she home?" said the postman.

"Ummmm…I think you, like, have the wrong house…" Gaara said.

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry!" said the man, bowing. "I'll look in a different neighborhood," and with that, he trotted off.

Odd, Gaara thought he didn't have a delivery truck or anything…Gaara shrugged it off and turned around. Temari and Lee's faces were inches from his.

"Did you just say "like"!" Lee asked.

"This is getting serious!" Temari said. "It looks as if Gaara is turning more and more into a girl as time goes by!"

Gaara gasped.

Dingo dong!

Gaara opened the door for the third time that day.

"Yo, Lee!" shouted Neji. "Want to come cosplaying with us?"

Only then had Gaara realized that Neji was wearing a white hat with cat ears, a funky jacket, a belly shirt, and blue jeans.

"Sorry, Neji," Lee said, "I'm kind of busy."

Tenten, who was wearing a top hat with bunny ears, popped her head in the door. "But we need a Mitsuki!"

Temari gawked at them. "What are you two supposed to be?" She said incredulously.

Neji and Tenten nodded to each other.

"I am Takuto" Neji said twirling around.

"And I am Meroko" Tenten said tipping her hat.

"And we are…" They said in unison. "THE NEJI RAMEN!" They finished striking a pose.

Now it was Gaara's turn to gawk.

Temari giggled.

"Now do your part Lee!" Neji and Tenten said in unison.

Lee fell on the ground and began laughing. "You…laugh…Said…Laugh…Neji Ramen! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Yay for Lee-Mitsuki!" Tenten said. Neji just stood there and blinked slowly.

"Well," Tenten said, "I guess the drugs I gave Neji are wearing off…I guess I'd better bring him back to my place and rape him while I still can!"

Everyone stared.

"What do you mean, Tenten?" Neji said, still under the influence of drugs, "I haven't even gotten to sing yet!"

Tenten began dragging a very confused Neji away "Later taters!" She said, off to her house.

Gaara closed the door and locked it.

They all leaned their backs against the door, terrified.

"Lee…I can't believe you have to hang out with those people…" Gaara choked out.

"Yeah…" Lee replied.

Silence.

Temari broke the silence. "Hee-hee, they said Neji ramen."

"What?" Gaara said.

"Don't you watch Full Moon Wo Sagashite?" Temari said.

"No." Gaara said slowly.

"What a shame," Temari sighed, "It's an amazing series. I laughed, I cried, I said, "What the hell is Jonathan supposed to be! A blob with a top hat!" but the ending was way to open."

"I know!" Lee said. "I mean, Takuto could've been like, "Do I know you?" Or he could have said, "OMG! MITSUKI! I LOVE YOU!"

Gaara's head was spinning.

So…so…much…random gibberish.

Gaara rubbed his temples.

Ding dong!

Lee and Temari were interrupted in the middle of a heated debate over who was hotter, Gaara or Takuto?

Gaara opened the door cautiously.

A familiar blonde, spikey-haired ninja stood in the doorway.

Naruto gasped, "Gaara? Is that you? I can't believe it! You've turned into a girl!"

Think, Gaara thought, think!

"Uh, I'm Gaara's cousin…Ringo…" Gaara said, trying to devise a plan.

"Whatever," Naruto said, "Is Gaara home?"

"No, he's not." Gaara said irritably.

First, rabid cosplayers and now this! Gaara thought.

Lee, seeing Gaara's annoyance, said,"We're umm…Kinda busy right now… Could you maybe come back later? Gaara should be home in a day or two."

"Oh, ok. Later!" And then, He left.

Naruto, the ipidimy of the word blonde. Gaara thought. Wait a minute…blonde…

Gaara watched Naruto walk away.

"Is something the matter?" Lee said.

"Yeah," Gaara said, a smile growing on his face,"I think we've found our culprit!"

To Be Continued…

Sorry, I had to cut it a little short… I'll try and make the next chapter funnier. I wrote most of this at 2 in the morning so I wasn't quite…there.

I'll try to write when I can but it might be in about a week.

Thank you!