Chapter 4: Cell vs. Naraku

"What! How will this work? We're on the same side?" was the incredulous cry Cell gave out when he was matched against Naraku. Naraku faced Cell readily in the opposite corner of the ring, his diguise flawless. No-one who wasn't in on the plan could only see a boy no older than 18, whose crew cut glistened in what little light there was in the indoor arena, and who was wearing those special pants that Buu wears (cut me some slack, I don't know what they're called!) facing off against Cell. Naraku, or Ukaran as he is being called by the announcer, gave his reply. "I didn't know this was going to happen. Oh, well. Surrender now, and we can achieve our objective later." Cell, who isn't a complete idiot, then said, "Won't that be suspicious? We gotta at least fake a fight! Someone might catch on!" Naraku chuckled, and punched Cell squarely in the nose, sending him flying into, then through, the back wall. The announcer then stepped into the ring. "Has he hit the ground yet?" As if in response, Cell flew back into the ring and began to make a barrage of attacks against Naraku. Naraku blocked and corresponded with a few hits of his own. "What the hell are you doing?" Cell, in a voice only Naraku could hear, replied "I don't want to look weak!" Naraku stepped back and pointed into the crowd, saying "Hey, is that Goku over there?" Cell looked in that direction, only to find himself on his back outside of the ring 5 seconds later. "There. Now you don't look weak, just stupid." Cell growled at Naraku's comment, then slinked into the shadows in true villain style. This match was done.

Now, if you've watched the Dragonball series, you'll know that preliminary matches go on simultaneously. In another arena, Miroku was desperately trying to fend off Kid Buu's attacks. He repositioned Buu's hands and feet only to find them returning to their original paths. In his heart, Miroku could not keep this up for long. Then, one of Buu's blows connected, and a three-fingered imprint was left on Miroku's face. The monk was surprised to find that it didn't hurt. He let his guard down. Kid Buu let loose 50 consecutive punches and kicks to Miroku's head, only to find that his target did not even flinch. "Aha! I guess years of being smacked by Sango have paid off! Woohoo! I'm invincible!" As Miroku was making similar remarks with seemingly no end in sight, Buu looked at his opponent in desparation. His eyes searched for a weak point... Aha! One kick in the groin, coming up! "Thanks Lady Sango! I'm invincib-OOH!" Miroku fell to the ground, clutching his unborn children in pain. "Not the monk's staff! How is Sango supposed to bear my child now?" cried Miroku. Kid Buu then tossed the writhing holyman out of bounds and beat his chest in ape-like triumph. Under his breath, Miroku vowed that Kid Buu would face the Wind Tunnel later. Unfortunately, he got kicked in the back by Sango. "I'm not supposed to bear your child, that's how!" yelled one bitchy demon slayer. If one focused their ears at that moment, they could hear Shippo say, "Oh, brother. When is that perv gonna learn?"

Also going on at that moment, Inuyasha was fighting Frieza. Or rather, dicing Frieza. Between Blades of Blood and Iron Reaver Soul Stealers, Frieza kept yelling his classic "Darnit!" until Inuyasha bitch-slapped him and said, "It's dammit, dammit!" Then, Inuyasha flung Frieza out of the ring, yawned, and said, "Okay, I'm gonna take a nap. Someone aughta take a look at that poor bastard though... Good night!" Inuyasha then jumped out of the arena, crawled in circles on the floor near Kagome's feet, and slept. As Kagome blushed, Myoga (who ended up there somehow) said, "Aaaawww... Kagome's widdle puppy..." You know who's gonna get squished now, right? You should. Of course, this is the D.B.Z. universe, so no-one really noticed that a dogman was curled up near a woman who just squished a talking flea.

As Goku was laughing at Inuyasha's antics, a voice from the shadows nervously said, "Can we make a deal, Goku?"

Stay tuned for Chapter 5: This is gonna be good! (Yes, that's the title of the chapter!)

From Flesheater777: I wrote this entire chapter. Since Justin can't do squat right now, I'm taking over temporarily. Besides, the poor kid barely knows what's going on in his own story. Let us pray the kid learns to write stories for himself...