Chapter 31 - Friday Night
Mike and I sat in the car, staring at the house where Byron now lives. It's an old townhouse that's over by Hollis college; we lived around here from when Ella was pregnant with me until we moved after Mike was born. We had agreed that this was probably a good way for us to get some sort of closure from Byron, but I think I'm the one who doesn't have it.
"Why the hell did I agree to this?" Mike asked and I shrugged.
"I was telling Ezra about tonight and he thinks maybe Byron invited us over so his daughter could have siblings." I told him.
"You sure we can't just ditch and go catch a movie?" He tried.
"We don't have to do this Mikey, there's no obligation for us to actually go through with it." I told him.
"Byron didn't want us… but he wanted her? How is that fair?" He muttered.
"I wish I knew how to answer that Mikey. But one way or another I have this feeling, like the little girl in there is going to have an impact on us or something." I said softly.
Sharing one last look with Mike, we both reluctantly got out of the car. With each step closer towards the house, it seemed more and more like a bad idea. Either it's my nerves twisting up my stomach or it's the feeling that his daughter is going to affect us. As we made it up the front steps, Mike quickly knocked on the door and it opened to a little girl. She looks more like a mix between me and Meredith..
"I'm Stella." She said happily.
"That is a very pretty name. I'm Aria and this is my brother Mike." I told her, making her giggle.
"My daddy said I could open the door!" Stella said
"Come on StellaBear, let them inside silly girl." Byron said, appearing.
"Hope you two are okay with chilli Mac." Byron said.
"Yeah, that sounds great." Mike and I said together.
"So, Aria, what are you doing now that you've graduated?" Byron asked as we followed him inside.
"I'm going to be teaching at the high school when the school year begins." I told him.
"Whatever happened with writing?" He questioned.
"I still plan to write, I'm currently working on a manuscript about the stuff my friends and I went through with Alison." I explained.
…
I sat next to Mike as Byron walked back from dumping the rest of Stella's leftovers into the trash. Stella had gone upstairs to play with her dolls because she didn't want to eat anymore. She is literally the sweetest little girl, despite who her father is.
"I want to be a part of Stella's life. She deserves to have a sister, someone she could talk about things that she can't talk to you about." I told Byron.
"Right, because you're the best person to talk about boys with my daughter." Byron snided.
"Umm, where is the restroom?" I asked, needing a small escape before this could turn into an ugly conversation
"Down the hall and the first door on the right." Byron told me.
I quickly stood up and walked out of the kitchen, and glanced around the photos on the walls of Stella growing up and photos of Byron and Meredith. They had a baby here when Mike and I came here. Yet, there had been no traces of a baby… or was I not paying attention to what was in the house? One photo caught my attention, it was a photo of Byron and Meredith at a New Year's Eve party, Byron had on a green windowpane plaid shirt. It was the shirt Ella had gotten him for Christmas, he never wore it except once on a date with her. Apparently, he had worn it twice. It was clearly 2009 in the photo, I can tell from how young Meredith looks and how everyone else is dressed.
"Did you lie when you told me that you ended it with her?" I asked Byron, who had walked up.
"Think this is the appropriate time to ask me that?" Byron hissed, which answered my question.
"Do not walk out of her life, the way you walked out of mine." I whispered.
"Why would you say something like that?" He asked.
"I'm trying to protect that little girl from going through the same heartbreak I had gone through." I snapped, trying to hold back my tears.
Mike appeared and wrapped me in a hug, I'm guessing to help keep me from falling apart. I never should have agreed to come here, when it comes to Byron…. it's always going to hurt me one way or another. Tonight was a huge mistake, I should have agreed with Mike to ditch and see a movie instead.
"Is this why you invited us? To show us how much better off you are without us? You're the one who didn't want us, Byron." Mike snapped and I realized something.
"Oh my god." I whispered.
"Aria, are you okay? What is it?" Mike asked, concerned.
"You KNEW I had been in earshot that day and that I'd tell mom and that she'd choose to have full custody of us and you'd have nothing to do with us." I said angrily.
"He played us… and we fell for it." I choked, looking at Mike.
"I mean it Byron, don't you DARE walk out of her life. It's bad enough Meredith left her, she doesn't deserve to go through what we went through. We didn't deserve it." I told him.
Without saying a word, I got out of Mike's arms and headed towards the door. Mike walked out the door without stopping as I went to grab my purse off the couch. I couldn't dare look over at Byron because if I do, I won't be able to hold back the tears. Mike was right…. it's not fair that he didn't want us but wanted Stella. Just as I went to open my door, I quickly turned around and stormed back to the house. Knocking on the door, I could hold back some of my tears and Byron answered the door.
"I was your daughter too." I cried as the door shut back in my face and I walked back to Mike's car
"Can you just drop me off at Ezra's?" I asked quietly as I got in and he nodded.
Staring out the window, I swallowed back the tears as I Byron watched us leave through his living room window. If Mike sees me crying, I just know he'll do something stupid and the last thing that needs to happen is that he gets arrested. But if there is one thing that's for sure, I want to be a part of Stella's life…. Even if it means dealing with Byron.
…
Ezra's pov
Flipping through the channels looking for anything that could interest me until Aria got here, I heard a car pull into the driveway. It couldn't be her, could it? She said it would probably be at least nine or ten at the latest that she'd be here. Just as I stood up to go see, she walked through the door and by the look on her face she was not happy. I've seen that facial expression so many times, she's trying to hold back tears.
"Aria? Aria, what's the matter?" I asked, rushing over towards her.
"Just… Ho-hold me." She choked out before bursting into tears.
"I got you, I got you baby." I murmured, pulling her into my arms just as she was about to fall.
She sobbed as I walked us over to the couch, gently pulling her onto my lap as I sat us down. This wasn't just her hormones messing with her, Byron had clearly upsetted her once again.
….
Few days later
Ezra wrapped his arm around me as he kissed the top of my head. I had decided to surprise him with a picnic lunch of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. It was helpful since The Brew gets closed for an hour and a half so everyone could have a decent lunch break. Only Ezra usually stays here for lunch, and if anyone shows up, we had a plan to say that we were going over our weeks with the boys.
"I forgot to ask, how was the movie yesterday?" Ezra asked.
"Stella and the boys loved it, Mike and I nearly fell asleep. Still wish you came with us." I said.
"I know, me too. But I probably would have blown our secret by doing this." He told me and brushed his lips against mine.
Giggling into the kiss, I wrapped my arms around his neck. I'm actually surprised that Byron is even letting me have any contact with Stella after how the dinner had ended, of course it came with the condition that she doesn't find out that we're actually sisters. Just as Ezra slipped his tongue into my mouth, the bell on The Brew entrance door went off and we pulled apart.
"Damn it, I thought I locked it." Ezra muttered.
"I'm not going anywhere, go make them a coffee." I said and he brushed his lips against mine once more.
"Be right back." He told me.
He reluctantly stood up and walked out of the office, closing the door behind him. I picked up the plates and quietly put them away into the basket, hopefully the customer doesn't have a complicated order. Pushing the basket aside, I sat on the couch and picked up Ezra's copy of 1984. Just as I opened the book to the first chapter, Ezra walked back in and sat down next to me.
"They just wanted a cup of water. And I managed to swipe you two cookies." He said, handing me two chocolate chip cookies.
"You must really like me." I teased.
"Nope, I just really love you." He whispered.
Something in his voice sounded off, or maybe it's my hormones messing with me. I've been pretty upset more than usual since the ill fated dinner with Byron. What could have clearly put Ezra in a sour mood? Glancing back to Ezra, I saw him watching me as if I could disappear in a second. Without saying another word, I set the cookies down and quickly cupped Ezra's face.
"And I just really love you too." I whispered, resting my forehand against his.
…
Hardy handed me a glass of sweet tea and sat down in the lawn chair next to mine. Caitlyn had taken the kids to the library for story time and ice cream afterwards if they behaved. Something in Hardy's eyes reminded me of Ezra's voice after dealing with a customer earlier.
"Are you sure there isn't another woman?" He asked.
"Why would you even suggest that? Ezra has never cheated on me!" I snapped.
"Because he has hurt you before, Ar, multiple times. First with Simone, then not telling you about Jackie, then it was Alison and the book, and now it was Nicole." Hardy said.
"He had told Simone he had a girlfriend. And telling a girlfriend about an ex - let alone an ex-fiancée is hard. Besides, he never cheated on me with any of them." .I pointed out, unable to mention Alison or the book.
"Did he tell you that he had told her? No. What about Jackie? No, it ended up being Frankie that told you and you weren't just his girlfriend; you were also pregnant with Oliver." Hardy told her.
"Why are you lecturing me as if I'm sixteen? Don't you think I've thought this all over already?" I asked, annoyed.
"I'm just trying to look out for you." He said softly.
"And I appreciate that, but Ezra and I have always worked it out before. This time is no different, we're taking it slow while we work everything out." She told him.
"Hardy, you've been like a big brother to me since forever but you don't need to try to protect me from my heart."
Running a hand through my hair, I silently sighed. He's been protective of me since I found out about Ezra's failed engagement to Jackie. But he's gonna have to realize that I'm a grown woman and have been taking care of myself for quite some time. Hardy is one of the few people that I could have an actual conversation about my history with Ezra without crying, but he needs to trust that Ezra and I know what we're doing.
"What time is it?" I asked.
"Four fifty seven." He responded.
"I better get going, Ezra and I are having a dinner and movie date." I told him.
"Aria, wait." Hardy said, grabbing my hand.
"I'm sorry. There was no reason for me to even suggest that there's another woman. I just don't want to see you get hurt again." He apologized.
"It's okay, I know you meant well. See you later." I said, squeezing his hand before letting go.
Walking through the gate, I saw the house and that Ezra was home from work. Luckily for us, Hardy and Cait are our only friends who live on the same street since Chloe moved out of her dads' house. I walked a bit quicker across the street before slowing my pace again. Ezra had texted me earlier, to say that the door is unlocked whenever I get there. Fish barked from the backyard as I walked up the sidewalk but couldn't hear anything inside. Opening the door, I stepped inside and saw Ezra drinking a beer on the couch and staring at the wall.
"Okay, not liking that look on your face. What's the matter?" I asked.
"I'm an idiot." He said, not taking his eyes off the wall.
I walked over by him as he continued to stare at the wall and internally sighed, sitting down next to him. The last time he talked about himself like that was when he was telling me that he was with Nicole. He wouldn't do that to me again, I know he wouldn't. We sat in silence as Ezra took another sip of his beer. The last time he drank while upset like this was when Mona had me in the shed, I only know because she had shown me the footage to torture me. All of a sudden, Ezra looked over at me and brushed some hair behind my ear and I rested my hand over his before bringing it down and holding it.
"Because I walked away from the best thing in my life." He said and by the look in his eyes, he meant us.
"Ez." I said softly.
"Walked away from you, from us…. all I ever do is hurt you." He said quietly and slowly took his hand back.
"We never said we were done with the separation." I reminded him.
"But we both knew we were done; we didn't need to say it out loud. It was obvious to everyone!" He snapped.
I knew he wasn't directing his attitude towards me, it was clearly to himself. Neither of us said anything as he stared at the wall again, what the hell happened that put him in this bad mood? Just as I leaned back on the couch, he gulped down the last of his beer and before I knew it, he threw it at the wall…. Smashing it to pieces.
Flashback - August 2015
Staring at my beer bottle now shattered on the floor, thoughts about Peter's heart attack ran around my mind. All I know is that he and Mary were at work when it happened, Spencer called me in tears and I got the first flight that I could get for me and Oliver. Ezra was already at the hospital by the time I had dropped Oliver at my parents and got a cab. Spencer refused to leave Peter or Mary when Ezra offered to bring her home since Toby had gone to get some things for Peter.
"Here, let me help." Ezra said.
"I don't need help." I told him and felt a shot of pain in my palm.
"Shit." I muttered as I saw a bit of blood.
"Come on, I'll take a look at it." Ezra said.
Before I could argue, he quickly yet gently pulled me up and led me towards the bathroom by the office. As he flicked on the light, I walked in and leaned against the wall behind him. Ezra turned to face me, he trailed a finger along the small cut.
"Doesn't look bad. There's also a small cut on your arm. One of the pieces must have flown back towards you." He said.
"Just my luck." I muttered, holding back the tears.
"Doesn't seem to be any glass in your hand or arm. Think it's safe to say that you don't need stitches." He said and I bursted out crying.
"Talk to me here Ar, what's running through that mind of yours? The doctors said Peter will make a full recovery, he just has to cut back on work and red meat." Ezra said.
"You're not allowed to ever fucking die on me!" I snapped.
"Aria." He said softly.
"I almost lost you once…. I can't go through that again." I sobbed.
"You won't, at least not until we're in our hundreds." He whispered.
I looked up to see him watching me, his fingers caressing my cheek. He brushed some of my hair behind my ear, not breaking eye contact. His lips were on mine, soft and gentle as he slid his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him. I ran my hands through his hair, my fingers getting caught between locks of his unbrushed hair. This was different from the very few kisses we've had the past few years and especially different from the kiss we shared right when I was leaving for school. He slowly pulled away but brushed his lips against mine once more.
End of flashback
Snapping out; I realized that we were both cleaning up his beer bottle. It wasn't like the bottle I had thrown, his was mostly intact except for the neck - that was broken.
"I got this, you could get hurt." Ezra told me, carefully taking the glass out of my hands.
"Ez... there was still a chance of one of us meeting someone else and getting into a relationship. This was all supposed to be a part of our story and I think it made us stronger in the end." I told him, lifting his face with my finger and making him look at me.
"All I do is hurt you." He repeated and walked into the kitchen.
"Tell me what happened." I said following him.
He sighed as he dumped the broken bottle into the recycling bin. Running a hand through his hair, he turned to face me and I walked towards him when I saw the look in his eyes. Neither of us said anything as I took his hands in mine.
"Ez, you gotta talk to me here." I said softly
"It was Nicole that showed up at The Brew today, trying to convince me not to get back together with you. And then I realized that after all the times I said I never would walk away, that's exactly what I did. I hurt you when it came to Simone, Jackie, especially Alison and that damn book." He told me.
"But you told Simone that you had a girlfriend." I reminded him.
"Not until the stupid dance and then I didn't even tell you that I told her, you just overheard me remind her that I had told her." He muttered.
"You still told her. Ezra, if you had told me that you told Simone we probably wouldn't have Oliver or Malcolm today." I said.
"What about Jackie? I didn't tell you about her either or about Alison, you found out on your own. And if I never got with Nicole then she wouldn't have tried to get me not to get back together with you." He said.
"Well, Josh said he loved me just to keep me from running back to you and look where we're at now. Ezra, every obstacle we had gone through… all of it made us stronger." I pointed out, cupping his face.
"Why couldn't our story just be simple?" He asked as he took my hand in his.
"Could you actually picture us having a simple love story?" I questioned.
"No." He said.
"Exactly, we're not supposed to be simple." I pointed out.
He didn't say anything as he brushed some hair behind my ear and trailed his thumb along my cheek. I wrapped my arms around him as he pulled me into his arms and kissed the top of my head. How could I not see this coming? When he told me that he started dating Nicole, he felt guilty for messing up our plan. Then he had completely punished himself after I found out about Alison and the book about her, even after we got back together he was still punishing himself.
"Stop beating yourself up… that's my job." I told him.
"You're terrible at beating me up though." He pointed out with a small smile.
"Now, why don't we go watch that movie and you can wrap your arms around me." I suggested and he nodded.
"How does Sleepless in Seattle sound? We could also call in some takeout too, whichever you want." Ezra whispered.
Without saying a word, I took his hand in mine and walked towards the living room. He sat me down on the couch before going over towards the tv and grabbed the dvd off the shelf of DVDs. As he started putting the dvd in, I went through the takeout menus. Just as I decided on Chinese, he sat down next to me.
"How am I not surprised? You want your tofu chop suey or something else?" He asked, draping an arm over my shoulders.
"Chop suey and also some egg rolls." I told him, receiving a chuckle.
"Ar, I would be very worried if you didn't want egg rolls." He teased and I jokingly rolled my eyes.
"I'll call in our order in about half an hour, that way we're not eating super early. Unless you'd rather I call now?" He asked.
"Half an hour is fine." I responded.
Resting my head against his chest, I smiled as I felt him kiss the top of my head and wrap his arms around me. Our hands met and I intertwined our fingers together as the movie started.
