Very happy...Chris has powers...and that was a damn good episode.
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Alright then, on with the story.

Wyatt Haliwell-Wyatt is a weird name...and other random thoughts
by me.


"So..." A very awkward silence filled the air. And it wasn't one of those awkward silences right before a kiss or after some damn great...well, you get it. It was a very uncomfortable, awkward, look-theres-a-demon-at-the-table kind of silence...

And there wasn't even a demon at the table...

"Peter...Leo tells me so much about you." Piper tried.

"Wait, I thought that stuff was supposed to be confidential." Peter said, all of a sudden sitting up a little straighter.

"It is..." Leo said, glaring at his wife.

"Oh yeah...well...I mean, he hasn't said much. Just...you know...um...never mind..." Piper looked at her food with great interest...

"Peter..." Chris said out loud. "Your name starts with a P."

"No duh, Dummy!" Wyatt replied, giving his brother a shove off his chair. As Chris orbed back into his seat, he gave his brother a smouldery look of death.

"Aunt Paige thinks you look like a fish." Chris said instantly, but when Paige sharply turned her head and glared at her nephew, he slapped a hand over his mouth. "I mean, she never said it. I just know it. Why do you look like a fish?" Chris said, and Piper immediately sent her son to his room.

"I'm sorry about him..." Piper apologized profusely, but Peter just laughed.

"It's alright. I know I look like a fish. Comes with smoking...I think. My mother told me I was cute when I was little..." Peter said.

"Yeah, but she's your mother, right?" Wyatt said, noticing the horrified looks on his parents faces. It was the only way to get out of these dinners..."I mean, she's gotta say that stuff."

"Wyatt! Room! Now!" Piper said, and put her head in her hands. At the same time, she dunked her elbows into the mashed potatoes on the table.

"Piper..." Phoebe said, when Piper didn't even raise her head.

"I know, Phoebe. I'm just trying to figure out a way to end the night where I don't jump off the Golden Gate Bridge. I'll be right back..." Piper replied, got up, and went to wash that mashed potatoes off her elbow.

Oddly enough, it turned out to be quitethemoisturizer...maybe it's all that butter and milk...

Back in the dining room, things were progressing very rapidly from bad to horrific.

"So, Leo..." Peter tried, but Leo wasn't even sure if this was legal...having dinner with his charges...as if marrying one weren't bad enough...

"I think I'm going to help Piper with her..uh...elbow." He quickly remarked, leaving as quickly as humanly possible...which meant orbing, of course.

"And then there were three..." Paige said, staring at Phoebe with a pleading look if there ever was one.

"No. Four!" Melinda knew she didn't want to be here, but she also knew that she needed her mother to send her off.

"Oh, Melinda. You're being such a good little girl, I had almost forgotten that you were there." Phoebe said, turning to her daughter and hugging her tightly. "Thank Heavens for you, my little Melly-Doll."

"Mommy...can I be escuzed?" Melinda said through the hug.

"I'd rather you stay with Mommy."

"Pwease? I'm weally bored..." Melinda said, hoping that she was being bad enough to be sent to her room.

"No, Melinda. You can't." Phoebe said, letting go and going back to her plate.

"But..." Melinda tried once more, but it was useless. Chris and Wyatt knew how to be rude and mean to everyone, but she couldn't ever be mean like them. She tried once, to this boy who was being really really mean to her, and telling her she had spiders in her hair...but she just couldn't get angry. She just felt really bad about the boys...

"No." Phoebe stated once more and the conversation was over.

Paige knew this was not going to redeem itself anytme soon, and for some reason, she really, really wanted Peter at the moment...

"Peter...let's get out of here..." Paige said, and Peter immediately got up. "Phoebe, we're just going to go back to Peter's apartment...get really drunk and forget tonight ever happened...or something...I'll see you tomorrow!"

"Drunk? What, Paige? PAIGE!" Phoebe shrieked as her younger sister orbed out with her fairly unattractive boyfriend.

"Oh, did Paige leave?" Piper asked, walking back into the dining room with her husband and a new bowl of mashed potatoes. And mighty soft elbows, if we may say so.

"Yeah..." Phoebe said, and noticed her daughter trying to figure out what the word 'drunk' meant...

"Mommy...what does-"

"Melinda, you're excused." Phoebe said, allowing the girl to hop off her chair and go running up to hang out with her cousins.

"What's going on here?" Piper asked her sister.

"Paige left here with Peter...to get drunk..." Phoebe replied.

"Drunk...oh no, Melinda...did she?" Piper said, realizing what must have happened.

"Yeah...I think Paige needs a break from the kids..." Phoebe replied, standing up and setting her napkin down. "Piper, I think I'm going to take a nice bath."

"What about Melinda?" Piper asked, but by 'Melinda', she meant 'her lovely dinner'.

"She's already upstairs with Wyatt and Chris..." Phoebe said, throwing her hands up and walking up the stairs.

"What?" Piper was about to go upstairs, but Leo stopped her.

"Piper...what's the worst that can happen. It's a word." Leo soothed her, and she decided to let her children sort this one out. She hoped it wouldn't end in disaster.

"I'm seriously not cooking for you people anymore..." And she went back to wash the dishes...


"Drunk...a verb...it means 'to imbibe alcoholic liquors'..." Wyatt read from his dictionary. It was an Adult's Dictionary, too! It wasn't really his though. He orbed it off of this bully at his school. Apparently, the kid was being real mean to Melinda. And she was a girl! It was the one thing he liked about being back at Magic School permenantly. It meant he could use magic freely. Oh, by the way, you should probably know that Wyatt was back at Magic School permanantly. It was his punishment for the Hogwarts thing...sorry, most likely, you should have been informed sooner, but hey...we've got lives...sometimes, you gotta figure out stuff on your own!

"Now...we just hafta know what imbibe alcoholic...lickers...means..." Chris said, grabbing his children's dictionary. Much prettier than the Adult's one... "Drunk. Past tense of drink. There. Nothin' fancy...imbibe..." He was annoyed...or rather..he wasn't...maybe he was...he wasn't sure.

"Yous a dummy, Cwis. Dwunk is not just ta dwink...or Mommy would'nt not been so mad when Auntie Paige told it ta her." Melinda told her cousin.

"Don't call me a dummy, Melinda!" Chris replied. He needed to tell off someone...he just wasn't sure why.

"I call you whatever I want! So there!" Melinda said, grinning at how mean she was! And she even stuck out her tongue! So, boo ya!

"Well...You're a poopyhead!" Chris replied. Greatest insult ever, right there. Poopyhead.

"Ewwww!" Melinda scrunched up her nose and swatted Chris away.

"Chris. Leave her alone. She's only five!" Wyatt said.

"So what? You were mean when I was five!" Chris told his brother.

"Well that was different." Wyatt replied.

"Why?"

"Becuase you were really annoying, that's why." With this, Chris felt a new wave of anger...he had to say something...to do something.

"You're mean!"

"Well, so are you." Wyatt was getting angry again. His brother always got on his last nerve lately.

"Am not!" Chris just wanted to push Wyatt's buttons...in fact, he just wanted Wyatt to fight him...so he pushed. Wyatt hated to repeat himself over and over.

"Are too!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!" Wyatt was giving Chris one more chance before he-

"Am-OW!" Chris shrieked as Wyatt tackled his brother to the ground. Melinda started crying as she saw her two cousins begin to fight-or rather, Wyatt try to beat up Chris. But Chris was abnormally good at Orbing, so Wyatt could never actually punch something solid.

"Chris, become real like a man so I can fight you!" Wyatt called out to his brother.

"Alright." Chris said, and Wyatt watched as his brother rematerialized on the top of the bookcase.

"Stop..." Melinda said, getting more upset.

"Come down here, you freak!" Wyatt screamed and Telekenetically grabbed his brother across the room. This was kind of fun...

"Stop!" Melinda said again, but no one listened.

Chris immediately orbed again, but Wyatt was too fast for him. He grabbed him again, and prepared to get him back on the ground.

"STOP!" Melinda shrieked, and well...a few things happened. First of all, Wyatt lost control of Chris. As a result, Chris slammed into a wall, crunch sound and all. At the exact same time, Phoebe came shooting into the bedroom wearing simply a towel and a rather lot of soap, while Piper and Leo came orbing in with dish gloves on.

"What the...WHAT IS GOING ON HERE!" Piper shrieked and heard the most rediculous phrase ever said by man.

"HE STARTED IT!"


So...that's the end of that chapter...I have the idea all set...I just needed certain things to happen...alright...I'm out!

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Sincerely,
Geneseo-Bound Leora