Disclaimer: Yugioh isn't mine…neither are the characters.

Chapter Warning: Contains violence, drinking and more RANDOMNESS! You have been warned…

"What are you doing here?" asked Pharaoh Atem, who'd been waiting in the Helicopter for Tristan and Joey to return.

"Pharaoh!" hissed Bakura.

"Tomb robber!" seethed Pharaoh suddenly standing up.

"Its time to Duel!" they said together, and activated their Duel discs. (A/N: Yeah, I finally figured out what they're called…)

"Mind if we take this to the shadow realm!" asked Bakura, "We haven't been there for quite some time now have we?"

"Oh, go ahead." Said Pharaoh, good naturedly. "And I think the last time we dueled in the shadow realm was…gosh…" he scratched the back of his neck as he racked his brain. "Last…Wednesday?"

"Hmm…I think it was Thursday…" said Bakura. "But no matter, the point is I think its about time we revisited it."

"NO!" gasped Pharaoh, dropping to his knees.

"What?" asked Bakura. "But I thought you just agreed to do it?"

"I did," huffed the Pharaoh. "But even you should know that its customary for me to say 'no' before we duel. Its tradition."

"Its stupid." Replied Bakura, crossing his arms. "It makes no sense. If you want to duel then just SAY you want to duel."

"But…tradition…" Pharaoh began.

"To hell with tradition!"

"NO!" Shouted Pharaoh,

"What?"

"Oh…don't mind me, its just another tradition." Bakura raised his eyebrows, nonplussed. "Its just something I have to say when you tell me not to do something…" Pharaoh explained.

"But IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE!" Bakura said, gritting his teeth. "And since when did you start acting accordingly to the formalities of the show!"

"Since forever!" said Pharaoh, sticking out his tongue.

"But you killed your companions quickly enough! And that's not supposed to happen!"

"I didn't kill Joey!" Pharaoh snapped, "But he's lucky. I was going to do it that last time we were at Kaiba's house, but it just slipped my mind."

"So, what's up with this tradition stuff?"

"Well maybe I LIKE IT!" Said the Pharaoh, turning and looking dramatic. Its time for a vision into the past!

We see Pharaoh, he's eight years old…he's doing something very important… its-

"What are you freaks doing?" Kaiba asked. He'd been trying to take Alistair away from the Helicopter's controls but the attempt(s) had been unsuccessful. Alistair insisted that he was going to Teach Mikey how to fly and had apparently created an imaginary Mikey in Pharaoh's absence. Right now Mikey was steering. "We're all going to die," Kaiba muttered.

"What?" Asked Ryou, Bakura had disappeared into his millennium item when Pharaoh had grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and threatened to stab him with the millennium puzzle.

Pharaoh instantly let go of Ryou, who fell to the floor (Don't worry, he laughed it off) "I'm too GODLY to die!" Pharaoh exclaimed woefully.

Kaiba had been about to explain that he had been exaggerating but this was more entertaining. He smiled as Pharaoh burst into Tears. Seeing Pharaoh cry Ryou knelt beside him and said, "Well it could be worse, at least we're dieing with our friends. And that's all that matters."

"But…but my kingliness, no, I think I'm going to let Yugi come back and HE can die and then I will take over his body again and-"

"Yugi's already dead you moron." Said Kaiba.

"What? He can't be! Yugi! YUGI! It should've been me, NOT HIM!" Pharaoh angrily pounded his fists on the floor, as Tears came streaming from his eyes. "Why? WHY?"

"Because you killed him." Said Kaiba blankly, he was beginning to feel a little creeped out.

"You…killed him?" asked Ryou, growing pale.

"Yeah? So what!" demanded the Pharaoh, defensively. "Its not MY fault he pissed off the great and powerful Pharaoh!"

Back on the ground:

"Crap!" Tristan exclaimed as he, Joey and Rex watched the Helicopter fly off into the distance.

"Tristan!" Joey scolded, "You know you're not supposed to swear!"

"Oops, I mean- THOSE JERKS!" Tristan yelled.

"Won't they notice that you guys are gone?" Rex asked, "You are the Main character's cheerleaders,"

"No," Tristan sighed, "Now that Yugi's dead nobody cares about us…"

"I'm right here you guys!" Said Yugi's zombie, "I'll never forget about you. As long as we have the heart of the cards we'll always be friends."

There was a pause as everybody struggled with the stupidity of this statement. Finally Tristan said "You're not Yugi, you're a zombie!" But he did look an awful lot like Yugi. Yugi gave a giggle and said "Zombies? Oh Tristan, we're not zombies! To be zombies we'd have to die and we can't die because we're important to this G rated show!"

"But what about Tea?" Asked Joey, pointing to the smelly bag of flesh that used to be Tea. Tea gave a giggle almost as dorky as Yugi's.

"I'm not a zombie!" She laughed. To everybody's surprise a zipper appeared on her forehead, slowly it unzipped and what climbed out of it was something so horrible and vulgar that its almost to gruesome to put into words- It was Tea….alive and healthy.

"But how the hell did you do that?" Asked Joey, "You fell off of a cliff, we melted your face, you probably got shot more than once-"

"Oh Joey," Tea laughed, "The power of friendship helped me, silly goose! But more importantly I was wearing a blow up Tea Suit!"

Tristan's scalp had become a lumberjack. "This-" Bam, "is," Bam, "So," Bam, "CONFUSING!" Another tree fell down and then Tristan politely returned to the group and asked "So what are all these other people who yell 'Uuuugar'?"

"Mostly fans," Yugi explained, "I think you might even have one, Tristan."

"UUUUUUUUGAR!" The crowd yelled.

"Why are they shouting Ugar?" Joey asked.

"Ugar?" Yugi said, "Oh Joey, its not Ugar, its Sugar! You of all people should have understood THAT!"

Everybody, except for Joey, laughed.

"Huh," Said Rex, "So we're safe? No more running from zombies?"

"Yeah," Said Tristan, "And what about Kaiba's parents? How is it that they were eating dinner with Kaiba when they're dead?"

Yugi and Tea both giggled obnoxiously, "Is your head on straight, Tristan? We never saw Kaiba's parents!"

"Valon saw his dad!" Joey pointed out, "And Pharaoh killed him,"

"Yeah," Said Tea, "But that was Kaiba's STEP DAD!"

Tristan was exasperated, "His step dad is dead too,"

"But that was Kaiba's NEW step dad," Yugi said, "Didn't you know? Kaiba got himself adopted again!"

"But he's eighteen already! He owns a company!" Rex put in.

"He got sick of taking care of Mokuba," Yugi said, frowning.

"That's so mean!" Said Tea.

"And it still doesn't explain why he had HIMSELF adopted!" Tristan sighed.

"You lost me," Yugi said.

"Huh?" Put in Tea.

"ARGGH!" Tristan yelled and ran over to his therapy trees.

Meanwhile Mokuba was still at Pegasus's house along with Valon, Raphael, Mai, Weevil and Dartz.

"Oh Dartzy-boy…" Pegasus said, pouring Dartz a cup of purply perfumy Tea. "Its just lovely to see you again, how have things been going?"

Dartz stared at his cup of tea, obviously remembering his Ming Dynasty tea pot, and cursed under his breath.

"What was that Dartzy?" Asked Pegasus, "Did I just hear a naughty word?"

"None of your business, you cartoon bunny obsessed maniac. What is this stuff anyhow! It looks revolting!" Said Dartz bitterly.

"Its tea!" Pegasus snapped. "And I don't see why you're so moody. I thought you liked tea!"

"What's up with them?" asked Mokuba, referring to the arguing villains. Valon sighed.

"Oh them, they go way back. Used to be childhood pals, didn't you know?"

"Really?" asked Mokuba, his eyes widening as they usually do when we reach an important part of a story.

"No, but it would make a good story wouldn't it?" said Valon. "The truth is, Dartz hates Pegasus's guts because of a duel they had a couple weeks ago. Noth'n too serious, plus Pharaoh broke Dartz's tea pot and he'd rather not think about it."

"Oh…" said Mokuba. "Where is the Pharaoh anyhow? Niisama's gonna be mad if anything happens to his coat. And trust me when I say that you've never seen my brother mad until you've ruined one of his coats." Mokuba gulped, it did bring back memories.

"Oh please," said Mai, rolling her eyes. "What's the worst he could do?" Well this is our cue to check up on what's happening on the helicopter, where the Pharaoh has just torn a fairly big hole in one of Kaiba's favorite coats.

"Ahhh, no, I didn't mean to! I just…it kind of…no! I promise I'll fix it!" Squealed the Pharaoh, who was dangling out of the helicopter's door.

"I'd like to see you try!" said Kaiba, flames rising in his eyes, as he firmly gripped the Pharaoh's ankle. "That coat was tailor made in a remote village in the Himilayas by the only person who knows haw to accomplish anti- gravitational force in fabric substances!"

"But I'm the all powerful Pharaoh!" Pharaoh scoffed, he wasn't feeling to all-powerful though, because the blood was rushing to his head and he was feeling a little dizzy. "Uh Kaiba," He said, "I don't feel so good."

"What was that, nerd?" Asked Kaiba, he decided to pull Pharaoh back into the helicopter and unfortunately that's when Pharaoh's nausea hit it's peak.

There were disgusting gagging noises and then Kaiba saw his coat.

"MY COAT! YOU FREAK! YOU HORRIBLE, SICK, LITTLE FREAK!" (Alright, so maybe freak wasn't exactly his wording, but come on, this is a kid's show.)

"I'm going to stick you out of this helicopter again," Kaiba said, grabbing for Pharaoh's ankle, "And this time I'm going to let go,"

But Pharaoh was too fast for Kaiba this time and ran away…straight out of the helicopter…Yes I know that all of you yu-gi-oh super fans are in agony at this point, but lets remember the wisdom of Yugi, shall we? (Big awkward silence) …alright then, lets just remember what he told Tristan, Nobody important dies in yu-gi-oh. So this is where the ever heroic Ryou saves the day.

This was it, Pharaoh, despite his godliness, was going to die! It was all in anime' slow motion as Pharaoh fell, which gave him plenty of time to think.

I'm sorry for being evil, I'm sorry that I killed Yugi, I'm sorry that I ruined Kaiba's coat- His thoughts were interrupted when a hand grabbed the chain around his neck and caught him by the throat.

"Don't worry!" Came Ryou's sing song voice, "Its me, Ryou, and I won't let you fall!"

"Ryou!" Gagged Pharaoh, "Pull me up!"

"What was that?" Asked Ryou, giggling, "You look awfully funny just dangling there with you face turning blue! Kaiba should get a picture!"

"What ever Dork," Kaiba muttered from inside of the helicopter.

Suddenly someone yelled "MIKEY! What are you doing outside of the Helicopter? I thought you were driving!"

"Crap," Kaiba muttered and quickly ran into the cockpit.

"Don't swear In front of Mikey!" Yelled Alistair. He shoved Ryou out of the way and pulled Pharaoh up. Once they were inside the helicopter Alister cradled Pharaoh in his arms, "Its alright Mikey, You're safe now."

Pharaoh had passed out so, on the whole, everybody was happy…except for Kaiba, but when is he actually happy? Well, actually Kaiba was feeling even less happier than usual. He was feeling down right crappy because not only had Alistair left the driving of the helicopter to an imaginary brother, the imaginary brother had managed to aim the helicopter into the direction of Dartz's building and had then gotten it jammed into autopilot. "Double Crap," Kaiba shouted as the helicopter slammed into the 'secret' lair of Dartz's.

To be continued….

Perky Perkinson: Heeeellllllooooooo to a Gal-orious morning! The clouds are dark, the rain is wet and listen to that thunder! Any who, this program is brought to you by Cute but Vicious Marshmallow Rum Bunnies from the creators of peeps, eat with caution!

Narrator (aka Atem): Previously on Yugioh! I- cough I mean – Pharaoh was rescued by Alistair from falling to his doom after he angered Kaiba by destroying a Kaiba anti-gravitational coat. Tristan, Joey and Rex were deserted by Bakura and found out that there were no zombies while Mikey flew the helicopter right into the super secret lair belonging to Dartz. Here, watch an intro!

Intro plays, it's really cool and the super yu-gi-oh fans applaud its nerdiness

Back at the Purple Pegasus Palace Mokuba sighed, "I sure hope Setos alright, he didn't even say goodbye…or blow me a kiss…not even a pat on the shoulder…" Mokuba was close to Tears and Valon was writing this all up onto a Kaiba gossip site. "He didn't even sing the good bye song!" Mokuba wailed, "He always sings the goodbye song!" Mokuba began to sing, "Bye little brother, I'll be back soon. I'll miss you dear brother, maybe 'round noon. I love you Moku', you're my little bro, and I'm so sorry that I have to goooooooo!"

"er," Coughed Valon, trying to sound casual while he typed, "So what else does Kaiba do?"

"Well," Said Mokuba as Tears welled up into the corners of his eyes, "He always carries a picture of me and I carry one of him. See?" He showed Valon the card locket that he wore around his neck, "It's a picture of him when we were still living in the orphanage."

"Lets have a look!" Valon said. He took the picture from Mokuba and quickly scanned it on to the web page. "Thanks," He said when he was done, "Its been a real help,"

"With what?" Asked Mokuba.

Valon slammed the laptop computer shut when Mokuba tried to look over his shoulder and said, "Oh, just understanding Seto Kaiba, that's all."

At that moment Kaiba burst into the room, using one hand to drag Alistair by the ankle, and his other hand to drag Pharaoh. They were followed by Ryou and Mikey, but because Mikey is imaginary he wasn't there.

"Nii Sama!" Mokuba exclaimed, "What happened?"

"This idiot," Kaiba held up a struggling Pharaoh, "Ruined by coat, this idiot," He held up Alistair, "Crashed the Helicopter into a sky scraper,"

"I didn't do it!" Alistair yelled, "Mikey did!"

Kaiba ignored Alistair and narrowed his eyes at Valon, "What are you doing with my laptop?" He asked. Valon looked down at the computer as if in surprise.

"Well now how do you suppose that got there?" Valon exclaimed.

Kaiba's frown deepened but he was too absorbed in holding onto the two 'idiots' to be too suspicious. "Mokuba," He said. Mokuba's eyes widened, that was Kaiba's 'its time you learned your lesson' voice.

"Yes nii sama?" Mokuba squeaked.

"My coat is un-repairable, its either your fault or," He kicked at Pharaoh, "His,"

Mokuba swallowed loudly. Kaiba continued, "So its time to choose. Who's going to get punished?"

Instantly Mokuba pointed to Pharaoh.

"Hey! You're the one who told me I could WEAR the coat." Said the Pharaoh, "You've betrayed me, Mokuba, BETRAYED ME!"

"Oh great," Kaiba said as Mokuba gave a squeal and ran away, "He's going to be waking me up with nightmares for weeks after this," But he didn't sound at all unhappy. "Hey Valon?" asked Kaiba. "You're good at this torturing stuff, why don't you do it?" Valon smirked.

"Sure thing," he said, "Just let me put your computer away and-"

"Which reminds me," Kaiba snapped, "What were you doing on my computer?"

"Me?" Asked Valon, innocently, "I was just hold'n it for safe keeping, Mokuba wanted to play games on it,"

In truth Mokuba HAD played games on it, that was how Valon had gotten passed the password problem. Mokuba had even excitedly said it aloud while he typed it in, "kittensarekute-with a 'k' in cute!" he had giggled.

"So," Said Valon, returning to the present, "I told him 'no Mokuba, your brother does important business on the computer,' and when he insisted- well, I had to take it from him, and that's when you came in here dragging these two," He pointed to Alistair and then to Pharaoh who was squirming, wormlike, trying to get out of Kaiba's grip.

"Oh," Said Kaiba, "That…that sounded like a lie, Valon, but I'll let you off for now because someone here needs to be punished."

Pharaoh was indignant, "HOW DARE YOU PUNISH THE ALMIGHTY-"

"Stuff it, Loser," Kaiba said, putting his shoe in Pharaoh's mouth.

"Well that's not very nice," Came Ryou's voice, "Why don't we all sit down and talk this through,"

Pharaoh spit out the shoe, "Yes, yes," He gasped, "Lets just talk this through,"

"We're finished with talking, remember?" Kaiba said coldly, "You opened your mouth but all I heard was retching!"

Everybody made a face at this visual, except for Ryou who said "Well then, maybe it was just a misunderstanding!"

"Misunderstanding my-" Began Kaiba but was cutoff by-

"Let him down you big meanie!" Came a voice that sounded completely identical to Tea's. That's because it was Tea's voice. Tea, Tristan, Joey, Rex, Rebecca, Duke and Yugi had just entered the large purple room.

Kaiba dropped Pharaoh and Alistair in disbelief, and Pharaoh fell safely into Alistair's arms. Then Tea fought Alistair for Pharaoh and Tristan beat up Ryou.

For no apparent reason Valon decided to join the fray and beat up Joey. Then, when Yugi and Ryou tried to end it by preaching the heart of the cards (Tristan had run off to save Joey) Kaiba and Raphael challenged them both to a duel.

So there was a duel, Raphael (who was dueling Yugi) played the seal of Oricalkose, made a few great moves and Yugi lost his soul (When will he learn?). Kaiba went easy on Ryou by NOT playing the seal of Oricalkose, which was lucky for Ryou who lost by a long shot. He kept on playing cards that included the words peace, friendship, and Tea Original (which was just a note card that Tea had scribbled on).

It took hours but, by the end of the day, everybody was too tired to hate each other. Pharaoh was so tired that he didn't even attempt to 'mourn' Yugi's unfortunate loss of his soul.

"What the hell am I doing in this Apron again?" asked Kaiba, looking down at himself. They were all lounging in Pegasus's large living room.

"Getting us drinks." Said Bakura.

"Ah yes," said Pharaoh Atem, who was lazily trying to beat Bakura in a video game. "My Godly thirst must be quenched."

"Ooh! I'll do it!" exclaimed Alistair , jumping to his feet and also putting on an apron.

"Yay! Friendship drinks!" shouted Tea.

"No, These drinks are for Mikey!" Alistair said, putting his hands on his hips. "Isn't that right Mikey?" He looked to Pharaoh for an answer. Pharaoh nodded.

"And me, right Seto?" said Mokuba, who had appeared just seconds before. He frowned as he saw Kaiba throw his Apron to the floor, stomp on it a few times, and then walk away. "But Niisama!" whined Mokuba, "I'm really REALLY thirsty!"

"Get it yourself," muttered Kaiba, "You're what, ten now?"

"I'm 11!" Mokuba said indignantly.

"Right, so get it yourself!"

"But I want you to get it Seto," Said Mokuba, annoyingly. "You make the best drinks! You know, the ones with the vodka, and the bananas-" Mokuba stopped as Kaiba quickly turned and put a hand over his mouth.

"How do you know about that!" He asked, turning red. The rest of the room broke into laughter…well, except for Pharaoh who quickly demanded that Alistair make him one, without delay. Kaiba scowled at them, and led his brother out into the hallway. Mokuba looked scared, and Kaiba withdrew his hand so that he could speak. "Mokuba?" He said, sounding less and less big brotherly every second (or more so, depending on who you ask…)

"Know about it?" said Mokuba, innocently. "I have them all the time."

"WHAT?" Growled Kaiba. "I've never made you anything like that before!"

"Well of course you haven't Niisama," said Mokuba, starting to giggle…which halted abruptly as he saw the look on his brother's face. "Er… well, I guess I just kind of…stole them when you turned around…or when you were on the phone. You just never seemed to notice."

Kaiba paused, did this mean that he was a bad older brother? (Wow, this is a super genius techie, CEO of Kaiba corp. who's wondering this. You expect this sort of thing from Joey or Tristan,)

"Seto?" Mokuba asked, there was only a faint smile on his face now, "You're getting that moral dilemma look on your face,"

"I didn't know I had a look for that," Remarked Seto in surprise.

"Yeah," Said Mokuba, "Its sort of a screwed up grimace. Like you're only struggling to comprehend it,"

"Hmmm," Said Kaiba as he thought this over (He preferred thinking about this rather than thinking about intoxicating his brother) "Uh…does it look good on me?"

"What?" Asked Mokuba.

Kaiba sighed in exasperation, "All of my looks must look good on me, like my deep thought scowling, my angry scowling, my selfish scowling-"

"You wear that one a lot," Mokuba broke in.

"-and my stressed businessman pose," Kaiba finished.

"Sometimes you smile triumphantly," Mokuba added.

"I do?" Asked Kaiba, "I'll have to fix that,"

"WHERES MY DRINK!" Pharaoh Atem was heard yelling from the living room. Something fragile and probably belonging to Dartz was heard breaking and Alistair started scolding him.

"ALRIGHT MIKEY! That enough! Its time for a time out!" Alistair said.

"A time what?" Pharaoh snapped.

"Oh, I'm sorry Mikey," Alistair apologized immediately, "I lost my temper, I hope you still love me!"

"NEVER!" Pharaoh screamed.

"No YOU'RE the best brother!" Alistair replied, and began repeating it over and over. Kaiba and Mokuba watched as the broken schizophrenic passed by them, still muttering to himself.

"He has issues," Kaiba said, wondering if he ought to be shielding Mokuba from this or something.

"He's just jealous!" Mokuba said, with absolutely no basis for the statement, "He knows that you're the better brother."

Kaiba smiled.

"There it is!" Mokuba said, holding a pocket mirror up to Kaiba's face, "See? Its Triumphant!"

Kaiba slapped the mirror away and put on his deep thought scowl, "Why do you carry a pocket mirror, anyways?" He asked, trying to change the subject. Mokuba blushed as he picked it up off of the floor.

"sometimesineeditforapplyingmymakeup," He said very quickly and quietly.

"I won't ask…" said Kaiba, but was distracted from…uh…not asking when two arguing men suddenly bumped into him and Mokuba. "Watch it!" exclaimed Kaiba, seeing that his Jacket had wrinkled slightly. The two men were Pegasus, and Dartz. They appeared to have not even noticed the Kaiba brothers.

"Oh Dartzy-boy! Why do you have to be so disagreeable!" Asked Pegasus, shoving past Seto.

"I'm not being disagreeable! I'm being reasonable! I don't think there's a person here, other than yourself of course, that wants to have cartoon bunnies painted on his face!" He said, practically stepping over Mokuba.

From the living room could be heard Yugi and co. shouting something about Joey and food. Right after that Joey came fuming straight into Mokuba.

"OW!" Mokuba said as he was squished onto the floor. Joey was standing right on top of him and appeared not to have noticed.

"HEY!" Seto Kaiba yelled "Mutt! Get off of my brother!"

"I WANNA YELL TOO!" Was all Joey said, "You're all insane! All of you! I don't remember any of you people being like this before we met those fan fic writers! Now the only ones who're the same are Tea, Me and-"

"I said get off of my brother!" Kaiba growled, and then punched Joey who collapsed onto the floor, either unconscious from the attack or how extremely drunk he was on Banana & Vodka fresh from the blender… Mokuba crawled out from underneath him.

"Thanks Nii-Sama," He said, "You're the best!"

Sadly enough Kaiba had only used Mokuba as an excuse to hit Joey, he'd been meaning to beat that mutt up for a while now. Mokuba, who had expected a hug, just got his hair ruffled while Seto handed him a wad of cash. Ah, brotherly love.

(A/N: fanfic writers stand for the genius writers of this master piece, Sorry, we are not responsible for any trauma that this fanfic has caused upon extreme fans of Yu-gi-oh or Anti-gravitational Coats) Remember to review… well, you don't have to really. But it would be nice. I've already got the next 100 pages to put on here and the more you review the faster I'll put it up.