A/N. Hey! This is my 1st f.f, but I'm writing it with thetorstir. O for all the Kikyou lovers,this is a Kikyou bashing f.f!

Disclaimer: Inuyasha and co don't belong to me, and neither does Desperate Housewives, or The Little Mermaid for that matter.

Life on Dorragu Kouhi Lane is far from straight forward. Every family had its problems, big and small. For the Mashin family, consisting of five people, had very serious problems. The main money maker, and husband and father, was Naraku. He was as ugly as hell, and botox had made his face resemble a fish's. Kikyou was the mother, wife, homemaker, and slut of the family. She used to be beautiful, until she experimented with blonde hair dye, and now she looked like a green version of Ariel from The Little Mermaid. Their daughter, Denbu,who is 16, had the most problems. She was going through sexual confusion, and tried to jump the school's principal, who was a woman. Their son, who is 12 years old, and is going through puberty, is called Saseko. Let's just say he was a little strange.

"Saseko!" called Kikyou, with that terrible screech she used.

"Yes, mother?" he called.

Kikyou walked into the front lawn, only to find her son straddling the family dog, Freddie.

"SASEKO!WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO FREDDIE?" she screeched extra loudly.

"I'm doing what I learnt in sex ed, mother," he replied calmly.

"Well, didn't your teacher tell you to use a condom?"

Saseko mentally laughed to himself. ' Didn't she even notice that I'm doing a dog?' he asked himself. Just then, Denbu came into the lawn. She was holding a slip of paper, that came from Shikon no Tama High School.

"Give me that," screeched Kikyou softly, if that is possible.

Dear Mrs. Mashin,

With deepest regrets I have to inform you that your daughter, Denbu, tried to rape her gym teacher. We have to take action, and the only thing to do it to suspend Denbu until her lesbian streak has ended. If you have any questions or concerns, please feel free to come in and talk to me.

Yours truly

Taisho Kagome,

Principal,

Shikon no Tama Girls School.

After reading the letter, Kikyou stepped away from her daughter.

"O gosh! Disgusting mother! That would be incest!"