As always a huge thanks Ambush99 for betaing the chapter. Amazing job as always.

Chapter 31

It has been two months since Sirius had left and he hadn't heard anything from him, nor had his death been celebrated. So, he guessed it wasn't all bad news. He wondered what his friend was doing and how he was. Sirius was the strongest person he knew, but just how much more trauma could his friend take? Especially considering the sacrifice his friend would have to make at the end of it. He shook his head as he thought of what Sirius had done throughout his life. What he had sacrificed. What he was willing to do in order to defeat Voldemort and he wasn't even going to reap the rewards. The doctrine had been well received by the Order and many of the plans had already been actioned. He knew many more would be actioned before the end of this war. He knew the only reason they would win this war was because of Sirius and the lifetime of work he had put towards it.

Despite everything, despite the worry for his friend which never left him, he could still find a smile. Sirius' idea had been genius. He had known Remus since he was eleven years old and had always helped him but when it came to employment he had felt powerless. But then Sirius, as ballsy as ever, had convinced Dumbledore to offer their friend a job. Remus had been shocked about the job offer, but from what Harry had told him he wondered why Dumbledore hadn't employed Remus before. History of Magic was rapidly becoming one of the favourite lessons amongst Hogwarts students. Something that would never have happened during Binns' time. He had struggled with his decision for a while before he had told Remus. He had wanted Moony to believe it was purely his ability that gained him this job, but Remus was far too intelligent for that. He would figure out what the ulterior motive was and he didn't deserve to find it out from someone else. That person had to be him, he owed both of his friends too much to start betraying them now. It had been hard to tell Remus but he knew it was for the best. He had understood, but couldn't hide the pain, no matter how well intentioned the action had been.

"Any Black sightings?"

Upon hearing Fudge's grating voice, James looked up and glared.

"Not yet, but he's mentally unstable and somewhat lacking in intelligence." Umbridge filled in with her sickly sweet voice.

"Of course, and when we do, there will be a nice cell for him in Azkaban. I'm sure some lawyer will try to convince us he needs treatment in St. Mungo's, but I don't think so," Fudge said with a small laugh. "No, just a one-way ticket for that disruptive individual."

James clenched his fists and took a breath as he tried to calm himself. But his grip on his temper was waning.

Umbridge joined in with Fudge's laughter. "Minister I need to talk to you about a teensy little problem at Hogwarts. I have some concerns…"

"Oh, of course Dolores, I have my own concerns as well," Fudge reassured.

"Well it's to do with his recent appointment of a half breed. A dirty werewolf," Umbridge hissed.

It was as though something snapped inside of him. It had been brewing for weeks. His concern for his friend, combined with the sheer terror he felt when thinking of the prophecy, and then there was the war. He couldn't take some worthless Ministry idiot berating his friends for a moment longer. "What do you know?!"

"I'm sorry?" Umbridge said, turning and flashing a toothy smile.

"How dare you call Remus a half breed when he's ten times the person you'll ever be!" James growled, barely aware the whole foyer had become silent.

"Mr. Potter, it's James isn't?" Umbridge replied in a childlike voice. "Can I call you James?"

"No you bloody can't!" James snapped.

"Mr. Potter I think you need to watch your tone," Fudge tried to add.

"Piss off, you buffoon," James bit back.

"No, it's alright Minister. Mr. Potter here is just a little bit upset about his little friends," Umbridge said in a tone as if she were addressing a child.

"Too right I am. But what pisses me off more than that is two half wits talking about my friends as if they were dirt. Especially when those two people are the strongest, bravest, most intelligent people the wizarding world has. Then there's you…" James trailed off as he looked Umbridge up and down in disgust. "You disgust me, you horrible, bigoted woman."

"Mr. Potter, I think you need to retract those words immediately or there will be consequences," Fudge cut in.

"Oh don't even get me started with you, you half wit," James growled dangerously. "You have been warned and warned about this war and yet you've done nothing! The Ministry has already lost good people because of your continued inaction. How many more will we lose before the war is over?! How much blood will be on your hands?"

"Mr. Potter!"

"Do you think those Muggle deaths are the work of some madman? No, you bloody buffoon, it was Voldemort flexing his muscles," James continued. He watched Fudge flinch at the mention of Voldemort's name. "Yeah that's right, Voldemort. Someone you are so piss-scared of you can't even say his name. I know you will seek appeasement with him and Voldemort will give it to you, but..." James stopped and laughed. "Yeah, he'll break those terms as quickly as he agreed to them. But you'll still seek it all the same because you are weak. If you had only listened to Sirius we wouldn't be in this situation, at least we would be better protected than we are now. If Sirius dies, his blood will be on your hands and I'll never forgive you. Sirius Black is ten times the person you could ever hope to be! He has more guts, more bravery in his little finger, than you do in your whole stinking body. Oh and he's not mad, far fucking from it! He's the strongest, bravest person I've ever met, and I'm honoured to call him my best friend. So why don't you just fuck off and do your job, and quit berating two of the most honourable, brave, intelligent people the wizarding world has?! It may be too late now but there is still a chance we can defeat Voldemort; just take the advice Sirius tried to give you time after time. Then, maybe, we might survive this war."

"Mr. Potter."

James spun around to see his boss standing behind him. Fuck, he thought to himself, I'm so fired. "Yes," he said hesitantly.

"Come with me."

James shot the bewildered looking Umbridge and Fudge a final glare, before stalking off. "Look, if you want me to resign or you want to fire me, I completely understand. But if you think for one moment I am going to rescind those comments then you are sorely mistaken. I'm sorry but I just can't," James said as he entered his boss's office.

"James, please take a seat."

James frowned, in all the time he'd worked for the department, Mr. Temperance had not once called him by his first name. He mentally calculated his finances, wondering how long he could survive without a job. "Mr. Temperance, look I'm-"

"You did what a lot of us have wanted to do for a while," Harold Temperance said simply.

Whatever James had been expecting his boss to say, it wasn't that. "What?" he managed to say.

"Your friend, Mr. Black, I have a lot of time for. He came across as the most balanced, reasonable person in the room. I can only apologise for not supporting him more than I did." Harold sighed and pushed a hand through his thinning hair. "I guess I had become so disillusioned by everything at the Ministry that I had become lost. It was your friend who began to wake us up, but too little, too late. Not that it was his fault at all. A very powerful, strong individual; the Ministry needs more people like him."

"Yeah," James said slowly, as he tried to figure out where his boss was going with this.

"And he was your secret keeper during the last war?'

"Yes," James said nodding, the familiar feeling of guilt returning. If Sirius hadn't been their secret keeper, then he probably wouldn't have been kidnapped by Voldemort. He wouldn't have been tortured for thirteen years. He wouldn't have become a bloody horcrux with a death sentence lying heavily on his shoulders. "Despite everything they did to him, he never broke. He never gave Voldemort our location. Then when he found Harry was in danger he somehow escaped and damn near killed himself to get back and warn us."

"A brave man."

"Yes, I feel..., well, I can never measure up to him. Anything I do for him will never repay the sacrifice he made for us."

"Your other friend you mentioned, Remus..?"

"Remus Lupin," James added, still wondering where his boss was going with this. It was, without doubt, the most personal conversation he had had with his boss.

"He's a werewolf?"

"For one night a month, yes," James added fiercely.

"I guess with my job I find myself again feeling disillusioned. You read so much about the evil werewolves do, but the documents only mention a couple of names. When you consider the number of werewolves," Harold said slowly.

"Not really," James started, as feeling slowly returned to his body. Maybe he wasn't going to be fired. "There are evil werewolves, just as there are evil people."

"Of course," Harold replied distantly. "And I doubt the Ministry's archaic policy helps."

"No it doesn't," James replied with a tight jaw.

"How long has Mr. Lupin had his condition?"

"Since he was five."

"How long have you known?"

"Since I was twelve."

"And you didn't...?"

James exhaled slowly. "Shit at first, hell I don't know. My parents brought me up to believe that everyone was equal, but at the same time I was surrounded by the prejudice in our society. But then there was Remus, he was a mate. We spent our whole time together and we saw the aftermath of a transformation. We couldn't abandoned him like he expected us to, he was our friend."

"That's when you decided to become animagi?"

James raised an eyebrow. "How, how do you know?!" he managed to stutter out.

"I'm head of department, I'm privy to high clearance reports."

"Yes," James started nervously. "Look Mr. Temperance, if you need me to resign or you want to fire me I totally understand."

"No James," Harold said, smiling. "If it was my choice, I'd give you a raise, and it's Harold."

"Of course, Mr. Temp- sorry Harold. Umm but…"

"If you need to take a 'sabbatical' to support Mr. Black, please do. Whatever happens in this war, we will need people like you in the aftermath, whatever that is."

"Mr. T-, Harold…"

"Think it over James," Harold said nodding. "You'll be missed, but I feel you are needed more somewhere else."

"Thank you," James said as he slowly stood. "I'll let you know."


James wandered into the pub and looked around.

"Oi James," Remus said waving wildly. "Mate are you blind?! Seriously mate I was waving at you for ages. You seriously need to get your glasses checked!"

"Piss off, professor," James said with a grin as he collapsed into the chair opposite his friend.

"You alright mate?" Remus said eyeing his friend's obviously conflicted form with concern.

"Yeah," James exhaled, looking down at his hands.

"Pint?"

"Please."

Remus nodded and made his way to the bar. Returning with two pints, he sat opposite his friend. "What's up, mate?"

"How's the job going? Harry says your classes are amazing. He's never spoken about History of Magic apart from to slag it off."

"He's too kind."

"Really?" James said with a raised eyebrow. "Most of the Ministry with kids are talking about you. I think you have single-handedly changed people's opinions on werewolves.'

"As much as I'd like to believe you, I think it's highly doubtful."

"Fine, don't believe me," James said taking a sip from his pint. "But it's true. Anyway, what's the staff room like? I think it was the one place we didn't manage to get into."

Remus tossed his head back and laughed. "Bloody weird to be in there. I keep thinking I'm going to be yelled at to leave."

"Ha! Yeah I can see that!"

Remus eyed his friend for moment. "Mate, what's the matter? I heard what happened at the Ministry."

"You did?"

Remus nodded. "Of course, you did what all of us have wanted to do for a while."

"That's what the boss said."

"So, have you been fired?"

"No. 'Harold' wanted to give me a raise."

"Really?! And since when have you been on a first name basis with the boss?" Remus enquired with raised eyebrows.

"Since my little 'discussion' with Fudge and that Umbridge cow," James replied.

"Well Flitwick declared he had taught you well and McGonagall proudly declared you were a Gryffindor and therefore in her house."

"Wow, I never thought I'd see the day when my old professors were actually proud of me."

"Mate," Remus said slowly. "Do you know where Sirius is?"

"No," James replied, sadly shaking his head. "I wish I did, then at least I'd know he's okay."

"Sirius isn't coming back from this, is he?" Remus asked. He watched his friend's eyes grow bright before he looked away. "I guess, I guess we have to be thankful for the extra two years we got."

"I guess," James replied sadly.

"You have wonder, how someone like Sirius, who is so good, kind and thoughtful, came from utter hell. His childhood with what his blood parents did to him. Then when he was held hostage and tortured for thirteen years, yet all he wanted to do was come back and protect us. He just wanted to protect people he did not even know. How is that possible?"

"I think his Animagus form makes it very apparent."

Remus nodded sadly. "You wonder how we missed Peter then."

"Yeah," James sighed tiredly. "I guess we were all tied up in …, I don't know. We were young, we thought friendship would last forever."

"I know. You guys are the best friends I've ever had. You accepted me without question, you accepted me for who I am," Remus said, taking a sip from his pint and leaning back against the wall.

"Mate, you are a wizard who just-"

Remus sighed. "James, don't be naive. Look at what Sirius did, look what he was afraid of. Everyone is afraid of my kind. But you and Sirius weren't, you always protected me and now I cannot do anything to protect Sirius."

"Yes you can," James said fiercely. "You can fulfil his wish and hopes. You can protect the students. That's why he fought for you. Not because he was afraid the dark side would use you, but he knew you would be a fantastic teacher and you would do anything to protect your students."

Remus closed his eyes and nodded slowly. "And you? What are you going to do?"

"I-I, I don't know. It feels so wrong, yet so right at the same time," James said as he ran a hand through his dishevelled hair.

"The best decisions always do," Remus replied.

James exhaled heavily and let his head fall into his hands. "Mate, if, if." He stopped and bit his lip, looking away for a moment. "If anything happens to me, please-"

"Oh course, you don't need to even ask. I will protect Lily and Harry with my life if I have to."

"You'd think it would be easier the second time around, wouldn't you," James said in a hollow voice.

Remus shook his head sadly. "We were kids the first time around. Naive kids forced to make adult decisions. This generation of kids shouldn't have to live through this; they shouldn't have to make the decisions we had to. That's what Sirius wants. I know I will never see him again, but I want to honour that man. My best friend, who despite everything going against him, despite having every opportunity to join the dark side, didn't. If he had taken that opportunity, his life would probably have been far easier for him. Hell, his parents may not have tried to kill him. But no, he refused to join the injustice of the dark side. I don't know what he is doing and you don't need to tell me, but you need to look after him. Someone needs to look out for him."

James looked up; he tried to blink away the tears. "I guess, I guess mate this is goodbye then."

Remus nodded, his throat suddenly feeling very tight. "Thank you James, thank you for being the best friend anyone could ever ask for. Thank Sirius as well. Just, thank you for seeing me for who I am, not what society thinks I am. You two accepted me and gave me the opportunities I have now. I, I..." He stopped and looked down, tears silently streaking down his face. "Farewell old friend, and good luck."


James paced up and down outside the house. He knew what he was going to do but he didn't know how to tell Lily. He felt as though he was abandoning her, and he basically was. With war escalating was it really the right thing to do, abandoning his wife and child? It wasn't as if he thought Lily needed him to protect her, far from it, he just felt guilty abandoning her. He knew he wasn't going to be skipping off into the sunset for a fun adventure. He was under no illusion finding Sirius was going to be easy, after all the man had evaded capture when he had escaped from whatever hellhole the death eaters had held him in. Then, even if he found Sirius, he was basically going to keep him alive until Voldemort killed him. The option of staying home was so much more appealing, but he couldn't. Not after what Sirius had done for him. Not after what Sirius had sacrificed for him. No, he couldn't abandon his friend in his darkest hour.

"James, are you going to stay there all day or are you actually going to come in?" Lily said from the doorway, her hands on her hips.

"Err, yes," James said sheepishly, as he followed her into the house. "Lily…" he said hesitantly, noting the backpack on the table. "What's…?"

Lily looked between her husband and the bag. "Oh don't be daft, darling. It's for you."

"Me?"

"I assume you're going after Sirius."

"What, l…"

"Darling, it's been brewing for a while, ever since Sirius left. Then today you have a public argument with Fudge and you meet with Remus. It was only a matter of time," Lily said gently.

"But.."

"James, you need to do this."

"But I can't leave you here by yourself. I can't abandon you during a war!" James exclaimed.

"James, I will be fine. You need to go. Sirius is our best chance to end this war."

"Lily," James started again. He ran a hand through his dishevelled hair. "It just feels, I don't know."

"I know," Lily said, as she continued to pack the bag. "I've packed some food, gold and potions. The potions are self replenishing. I hope you don't need them, but you're with Sirius, so…"

"Are you sure?" James asked hesitantly.

"Yes," Lily replied determinedly, fixing a smile in place.

"God, how did I manage to get married to someone as amazing and intelligent as you?" James said, taking her into his arms.

"Well, once you stopped acting like an idiot…" Lily said smiling.

"Yeah."

"When are you going to leave?"

"I guess, well, with everything." James stopped and sighed. "Tomorrow? Probably after nightfall."

Lily nodded. "Just look after yourself and bring Sirius home."

James fixed a smile in place. "Of course." He swallowed. 'Bring Sirius home'. He bit his lip, it was so hard to pretend, especially when he knew Sirius was never coming home.