CAPTAIN DUSIS

By: oONekomataOo

Disclaimer: I don't own anything

Warnings: uh…a little shonen-ai later, maybe. And OOCness. Mwa ha ha!

Neko: I'll be the first person to admit that my memory sucks, so I did some research on the Captain Planet series. 20 minutes on Wikipedia later, I found a ton of data to totally corrupt. After I got off the floor from laughing so hard. Some encyclopedia authors really like to read into things a bit too much…XD

-------Response to Reviewers-------

Neko: Holy flaming possums, people actually reviewed this thing! Whoa…

xxDKGurlxx – I laughed my ass off just writing this stupid thing! I knew from the start Rath would have to play Captain Dusis. You'll get a better description of his lovely leotard in this chappie.

Hiranieas – I'm glad you liked it! I've got a couple other chapters already sketched out, so I hope to continue with this freakshow of a fic.

Azure-chan – Thanks for the double review! A "bishi" (or the plural "bishis") is just another way of saying "bishounen" (Jap. "Pretty-boy"). Although it's more 'Japanglish' than anything. I tend to sprinkle a few foreign languages in my writing, so from now on I'll translate them either right after I use them or at the bottom of the fic. Sorry for the confusion!

Dragon of Eternal – Alright! Somebody else remembers Captain Planet! Ha ha, I think that "Hokey" was being kind, D.O.E. And I used 'Rezzy cause I wanted to have somebody with an unrequited love interest within the Dragonteers, like the original Planeteers. Well, that and I like Bierrez.

Keiko – You remember the craziness that was Captain Planet too? Awesome!

Sango The Demon Exterminator – Thanks! You okay from that fall? I've done that too.

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Spandex and Moodrings: Part I

It was a typical day in the crowded marketplace of Chantel: fruit vendors selling freshly plucked apples, merchants selling beautifully spun silk shirts and apparel, blacksmiths pounding away on red hot iron weapons, scraggly-faced farmers prepping their prized poultry for the day's latest cockfight bloodbath…Yep. A typical day for the residents of Chantel.

Renowned for its beauty at towards the heart of the Dragoon continent, Chantel enjoyed pleasantly warm summers and mild winters. Always a popular vacation spot, Chantel came to life in the springtime when a wide assortment of flora bloomed all over the town. From its outskirts to innermost cobbled alleyways, violets, daisies, and azaleas sprung up to flood the town in color. Chantel also had one more claim to fame—liquor.

Yes, beneath its flowery streets filled with the ever-smiling Happy Folk, Chantel ran one of the largest underground brewing systems in Dusis. Nearly five dozen metallic vats of alcohol lined the town's lower levels, so needless to say their drunks never went thirsty. Word had spread quickly about Chantel's newest enterprise, reaching even Dusis' duo of planet deities on the elusive Hope Island.

"I can't believe we actually have to do this…" came an annoyed voice from a group of five brightly colored teeny-bopper heroes. "Stupid mission, stupid pink shirt, stupid ring-thingy, stupid lame excuse for a power, stupid monkey sidekick, stupid…"

However nobody really paid attention to what poor, disgruntled Bierrez was saying. By now they were all used to the Heart-wielding Dragonteer's rants. Well, nobody except for Pedro.

"Ooouuuaaah! Ah! Ah! OuuuouuAHHH!" snarled the enraged chimp. Pedro was a proud chimpanzee for crissakes, not some inferior little monkey subspecies. He immediately began pounding on Bierrez's from his convenient location on the angry dragon's shoulder to remind him that.

"OWW!" cried Bierrez "#$&#$# MONKEY!"

As the two broke into yet another argument, Rune, the Water Dragonteer, turned to face his other companions.

"It's close. I can sense Evil nearby," he stated. "What do you guys—Hey, are you listening to me?"

Wind-wielding Cesia was too busy scoping out potential boy-toys in the crowds to be paying any attention to where she was walking, much less what her teammates were saying. Gil the Fire master was walking a little ways behind the group as if he was a part of the team, yet not connecting with them somehow. A permanent cloud of angst and sorrow drifted above his head. He was currently in the middle of reminiscing about his torturous childhood filled with poverty, abusive parents, wicked chipmunks, and far too much catnip. Only the fifth Dragonteer, glutton and Earth elemental extraordinaire, Thatz responded.

"Eh? Did you say something?" he asked, biting into an apple. "I wasn't really listening."

Rune smacked his forehead and wondered how the hell he got stuck with these freaks to save the world.

"In case you've forgotten, we were sent here by the Great Kai-stern on an important mission."

"Going to Chantel, beating up bad guys, and bringing back several cases of Lefury is hardly a 'mission,' Rune."

Just before Rune could bludgeon Thatz's brain for insulting everything from their honor as Dragonteers to their under-the-influence mission giver, Cesia let out a shout. After running into a wooden pole that is.

"Omigawd! Did you guys see that!" squealed the obviously flustered Cesia.

"Er…see what?" Thatz asked, looking around.

"An evil-doer?" offered Rune.

"What? NO! That uber-hot guy over there!" pointed the Wind master. "He was totally checking me out!" she beamed.

"You sure? Last time that happened, the dude turned out to be eyeing Rune-chi," grinned the brunette.

"THATZ!" erupted two very angry voices, as their owners simultaneously smacked him upside his pretty little head.

"I…Itai…" Thatz managed to utter from the ground.

"As I was saying," glared Cesia. "He reminds me of the time I got my Wind ring here…" she cooed, stroking the silver gem lovingly.

Without warning, the background started to get hazy. People and buildings seemed to spiral together before becoming lost in a purplish fog. As the boys quickly glanced around in uncertainty, they noticed a large beam of light fall upon Cesia. The shock quickly set in, but before they could escape, they too were sucked into violet haze… The flashback sequence had already begun.

------Flashback: Cesia

A young girl with dark, wavy hair was walking across a beautiful field filled with dark red blooms. She brushed the hair out of her eyes, as she enjoyed the cool breeze. Once she had allowed the peaceful wind to brush against her features a little longer, Cesia continued on her way.

Moments later, the girl arrived at her secret place. Deep within the hilly landscape of Misty Valley, stood a lone oak tree. Perched underneath the giant oak, Cesia playfully tugged at the ribbons binding her hair into long spiraling braids of ebony drifting behind her in the breeze. This girl really likes her wind, huh?

High above her in the mighty oaks branches, Cesia could hear her bird friends singing away. A smile tugged the future Dragonteer's lips as she decided to join them in song…

"Jeeesus take the WHEEEEEEEEEL, take it from my HAAAAAANDS, 'cause I can't do this OOOOON MY OOOOWN!"

The birds promptly flew away in fear.

"Hey!" yelled Cesia as she spat out a curse under her breath. Reaching into her pocket, she pulled out some sandwich bags filled with birdseed. Birdseed that Cesia had laced with a little LSD, y'know just to give it a little kick. "I brought you guys a snaaaack…" the temptress beamed.

The feather-brained flock immediately screeched to a halt, turned around, and dive-bombed out of the sky towards their briber.

"Eeek!" shrieked Cesia, throwing the illegal seed away from her.

The birds immediately tore the bags to shreds, squaking with glee amongst themselves in a particularly disturbing manner. Soon after the LSD-ridden birdseed had been devoured by the aviary addicts, they could feel the buzz humming throughout their tiny bodies. They wobbled and staggered about, lost in their birdie hallucinations of gold plated birdfeeders, boxes of supped-up seed, a catless world, and Big Bird.

"Tee-hee! You guys only listen to me sing after I give you your Special Seed!"

Luckily, fate intervened before the birds were forced to listen to another ear-splitting rendition of Jesus Take the Wheel. One brave little sparrow hopped over to Cesia, and painfully extended its broken wing towards her, hoping that his dealer, er, friend could help.

"Aww, did da poo wittle birdie get a wittle boo boo?" Cesia cooed.

The injured sparrow only clucked in confusion.

"Don't worry! I'll fix ya!"

And with that, Cesia painfully wrenched the poor bird's broken wing behind its back and untied a ribbon from her hair, completely ignoring its cries of protest as it struggle to escape the clutches of the insane woman. Not one to let a little thing like malpractice stop her, Cesia tightly fastened a pink ribbon to the sparrow's broken wing. Twirling the excess strands into a bow with flourish, she smiled.

"There you go! All better!"

The tiny sparrow quickly hobbled off in pain, chirping curses as it went. Taking it as a thank you, Cesia smiled again happily. As she looked down however, she noticed a beautiful silver ring glimmering in the sunlight. She also noticed a pigeon eying it.

"MINE!" she screamed, making a dive for it.

However the pigeon had the same idea, and a fight ensued. Although the valiant pigeon pecked, bit, and clawed with all its strength, it proved to be no match for the much larger Cesia. The girl grabbed the ring from its beak, knocked the bird to the ground, and kicked it before it could swoop around her head and get stuck again.

"Ha! Ha! I win!" cried Cesia as the purplish mist reemerged from the background, returning everything to its normal state.

-------------End of Flashback

"And that's how I got my Wind ring," stated Cesia with pride. "Bloody bird never stood a chance."

"Uh…I think that's animal abuse," said Rune.

"Nah, pigeons are practically demons so they don't count," Thatz answered. "But there's one thing I would like to know, Cesia…"

"Hmm?"

"What the hell does that have to do with a hot guy?"

"Psh. C'mon Thatz!" laughed the wind mistress "Just look at the way he carries his prized warrior!" she grinned, pointing to a particularly hairy cockfighter owner as he dragged along his chicken by the neck. Both appeared to have flecks of blood covering them as well. "That chicken kinda reminds me of that one evil pigeon…"

Cesia drooled. The men immediately turned several shades of green.

"That…That's just wrong…" Thatz managed to choke out.

Rune was only able to nod in agreement while Cesia fumed.

"It is NOT!" she yelled. "Who cares what you two morons think anyway, right Bierrez!"

When no answer came, the group turned around to find Bierrez on the ground unconscious. Above his scratched up face was Pedro hopping about in a victory dance of some kind. Apparently, Pedro had managed to get the upper hand during Cesia's flashback, by biting Bierrez's nose while he was intently listening to her. Once he was done, Pedro rested on the Dragonteer of Heart's back, pulled out a carton of cigs from his tattered chimpy vest, and lit up with the lighter he kept safely tucked away in his hat. Taking a few drags, Pedro gave a happy little primate sigh before continuing.

"…Right. So how'd you get your ring, Thatz-chan?" Cesia asked, quickly changing the subject.

"Well…" started Thatz, as the familiar spotlight and fog appeared once more.

---------Flashback: Thatz

A young boy was passing through a desert on the edge of Lya, a small village located in the Kuulta kingdom, just off the coast of Dragoon. Using the darkness as his cover, the stealthy brunette made his way to a group of six mud and straw huts. The pale moonlight outlined the sly grin fixed on his face and enhanced the glimmer in his emerald eyes. A final glance for any guards or civilians, and Thatz closed in on the nearest hut.

"No security?" Thatz murmured to himself. "I am going to rob these people blind."

The crafty thief crouched beneath the window that had been cut into the side of the small hovel and listened for voices inside. No sound at all. Carefully peeking into the window showed no signs of life either. As there wasn't any glass to covering the gap in the wall, Thatz quickly jumped through the windowpane. The boy grinned as he landed without a sound.

'Too easy…' thought Thatz.

He pulled out his Lootin' Sack and went to work on the first unlocked chest.

"Junk, junk, bills, hammer, teddy bear, legal rights to Dragon Knights, junk, junk," listed the thief as he tossed the items over his shoulder. "Junk, junk, large conspicuous rodent, junk, DNAngel vol. 8, eye of newt, junk, junk…Ooh, Yams!"

He pocketed the treat for later and moved onto a nearby jar filled with a strange, orange liquid. Curious, Thatz stuck his finger in for a taste. Bringing it up to his nose first, he decided that it smelled normal enough, and stuck his finger in his mouth. Two seconds later he felt his tastebuds explode.

"Whoa…" gasped the wide-eyed Thatz "I will definitely not be stealing this stuff!"

The future Dragonteer wisely made his way away from the pot of overly sugar-nated orange beverage and towards the chest of drawers. Opening them quietly, the thief pulled apart the contents of each drawer. A trashy array of the strangest clothes he had ever seen awaited Thatz. Canary yellows clashed with neon pinks on fur coats, bright green and orange polka-dots met deep red and blue plaids on a rather lacy men's shirt, several form-fitting tee-shirts that had been dyed so many colors, that they appeared to be a grimy brown…

"Ugh, who would wear this stuff?" muttered a disgusted Thatz while inspecting a tag closer "'Made in China'… Where the hell's China!"

He grabbed some of the least offensive garments and stuffed it into the sack in hopes of selling it off to some drag queen on the streets. Sighing in annoyance, he shut the last drawer of the bureau that had 'Nadil' engraved in fancy letters. This hut proved to be a dud, so our daring thief headed over to the next murky looking hut.

This hut yielded similar results, although not as psychologically scarring as the first hut's questionable clothing. Two hovels later, Thatz was about ready to leave.

"What's going on? I know I heard that there was supposed to be some real treasure out here!" growled the brown-haired bishounen. "There's not even any sign of life out here!"

Thatz angrily kicked a stone on his way to the last two huts. Luck finally seemed to be on his side as he found five bucks, some gum, and a bouncy ball. Evil grin back in place, Thatz prepared to go to the last hut, when a noise startled him.

"Wark."

Thatz looked around.

"Wark."

'The hell?" he thought.

"Wark. Wark."

Then he saw it—a baby blue penquin. Thatz came over to see it better.

"Wark."

Thatz blinked.

"Eh, sure, why not?" he shrugged as he carefully stuffed the penguin inside his Lootin' Sack.

Outside again, Thatz started over to the final hut. He had long since given up sneaking around after not seeing a soul anywhere on or near the settlement. Thatz figured some giant scorpion had probably done them in. Probably better that way too, those clothes back in the first little hut were glaring enough to cause blindness. Or ugly enough to make people want to gouge out their own eyes if it meant not having to see them anymore.

Once inside the last hut, Thatz's jaw went slack and his eyes started to glitter. There, placed on top of a ceremonial alter was a beautiful, burgundy staff. Thatz wasted no time racing over to it. He traced his trembling fingertips over the intricate designs that flawlessly wrapped themselves around the base of the staff. Looking it over, his eyes finally rested upon the gorgeous jade gems imbedded into the top of the ornate staff. Each one would be worth about the price of a large village. Insert Homer Simpson style drooling here.

"Sweeeeeeet…"

Visions of castles, riches, and banquets for every meal danced around Thatz's head while he wrapped up his newfound treasure with care. Just as the chibi-dragons has started blowing their little horns announcing the arrival of Thatz the King of Thieves in his mind, he caught a glimpse of the rising sun in the distance.

"And now the Great Thatz makes his escape!" the brunette smirked as he dashed out the doorway.

Typically, Thatz likes to take things easy, but he can also get swept up in the moment just like others; especially when food or treasure was involved. This was one of those times.

"I…huff, huff,…can't believe I…weeze…ran…cough, cough,…twelve whole miles…!" stuttered the exhausted thief.

Completely exhausted, Thatz had collapsed under a palm tree on a cliff overlooking Lya. He opened his canteen and greedily drank the water.

'It was worth it though,' thought the thief as he unwrapped the staff that was about to make him a millionaire. 'This thing is pimp.'

"Wark," came a muffled voice from within Thatz's Lootin' Sack.

Figuring that the strangely colored penguin probably wanted some air, Thatz reached into the Lootin' Sack and pulled it out.

"There ya go, little guy," said the thief. "Now you can get some fresh…what are you doing?"

The blue penguin chirped and started to waddle off near the edge of the rocky cliff. Next, it turned its head slowly to face its kidnapper, eyes glowing red.

"Um…"

"WARK!"

And with that, the bird vanished into a sphere of golden light. Thatz stood speechless as a figure emerged from the glow. A short, aging man in grass skirt and painted symbols covering his tan body now stood before him.

"Ooonga Boonga Slabu SHLET!" screeched the Voodoo dude

"HOLY SHIT!" screamed the shocked brunette. "I've angered the Penguin King!"

Turning away from the horrific sight, Thatz quickly grabbed his prized staff and took off like a bat outta hell.

Unfortunately for our hero, the magic munchkin foresaw this, whipped out his enchanted ketchup bottle, and flew after Thatz. Equally unfortunate was the fact that the little magician crashed right into the back of Thatz's head, splurting ketchup everywhere and causing the future Dragonteer to drop the staff…snapping it in two.

From the ground, Thatz looked up in horror at the tragic event that now seemed to be happening in slow motion.

"Noooooooooooooo!" Thatz cried as he stretched out an arm in vain.

Tears in his eyes, the thief pounded the ground in frustrated agony. The Voodoo dude however managed to hold back the waterworks long enough to waddle over to the bejeweled portion to the broken artifact.

"Unga glef," he said mysteriously as he picked it up. Then turning to the sobbing criminal, the man muttered a solemn "Glabu glakt," and disappeared into a cloud of smoke along with the priceless jewels.

Slowly climbing to his feet, Thatz made his way over to the bottom section of his beloved staff. It was half buried in the ground, so the sad boy pulled it out. And there, nestled among the mud and earthworms was a golden ring with a green stone shining with a mix of grief and snail slime.

"You…You wanted me to have this…" gasped out the young man to his dying treasure. "Yes, yes, I understand now…"

Thatz placed the mucky ring on his trembling index finger and then collected the staff in his arms. He carried the staff over to the cliff overlooking Lya and somberly buried it. When he was finished, he took one last look at his dearest treasure before dramatically turning to walk away. Thatz's eyes now burned with renewed hope and determination that he hadn't felt in years.

"I will avenge you…Josephine…"

-----------------End Flashback

"…And that's how I got my ring."

Cesia sniffled a bit before grabbing her handkerchief and blew her nose loudly

"That…that was so beautiful, Thatz!" she choked out between sobs.

Gil and Rune gaped at their two tearful teammates, at each other, and then back at Thatz and Cesia.

"…That was the stupidest thing I've ever heard."

The Earth and Wind masters quickly turned to glare at Bierrez.

"What'd you say!" growled Thatz.

"What? Did you not understand the 'stupid' part or the 'stupidest thing ever' part?" quipped the Heart Dragonteer, smirk back in place.

"Go back to being unconscious!" Cesia snarled back.

"Wait…How'd you recover so fast?" asked Rune gesturing to Bierrez's now scratch and bite mark-free face.

"It's a parody of a freaking kid's show. If I wasn't instantly restored to health, there'd be problems with the storyline," Bierrez answered.

"Since when does the authoress know how to follow a storyline?" laughed Thatz. "She can't even remember where she leaves her shoes every night!"

Without warning Cesia whacks the three of them on the back of the head with a conveniently placed folding fan.

"Stop breaking the fourth wall, you idiots!"

The three boys grumbled a bit, but complied.

"Right, now where were we?" asked Bierrez. "Oh, yeah, I was about to regale you all with the tragic tale of how I received my dumb ring…"

"What? No you weren't—"

Rune was immediately silenced by the reoccurance of the cheap flashbacky special effects, as the purple fog and spotlight returned.

------------ Flashback: Bierrez

Deep within a tropical rainforest on a small, unnamed island off the tip of the Dragoon territory lived a young man loved by all. Or at least loved by his village, anyway. He was the only hottie within the island's limits, and these people didn't get out much.

For Bierrez this was both a blessing and a curse. On the plus side, he got all the attention from the cute girls that inhabited the island, but most of them had warped into obsessive Bierrez fangirls over the years, and now liked to stalk him. At first, Bierrez enjoyed the delicious treats and strawberry scented shampoos that they had brought him, yet grew wary of his little fan following once they had started living in the bushes outside his home and chanting 'Rezzy I love you!' from his window every night.

This was one of those days when Bierrez decided that he needed to take a little break from the lovestruck ladies by hiking through the rainforest in search of true love and a conditioner that wouldn't leave his hair all frizzy and unmanageable.

"Yes, Anna I'm sure I'll be fine. Of course I won't get lost, Sara, I've lived here my whole life. No, Maria I won't be needing your company today. I'll be back before tomorrow, Jean. Oh, Tanya…why don't you hang onto your own bottle of 'lucky rabbit brains' for me…"

It's a miracle that he's lived this long. Fake smile plastered in place, Bierrez said goodbye to his fan club and headed off to the more dangerous part of the jungle. The much-admired native knew that he would be safe from his hordes of fangirls for the moment, because yet another had recently been eaten by a jaguar when she went searching for raspberries in the forest to make a new fragrance in the shampoo line for the object of her affections.

"No skin off my nose," muttered Bierrez. "I hate raspberries…"

The future Dragonteer continued down the old path overgrowing with plants lost in his thoughts. It wasn't that he hated the lovely ladies that drooled in his wake, the spiky-headed youth just didn't possess any romantic feelings towards any of them. He was looking for his true love, his Queen, his Someone Just For Him, and none of them fit the bill.

Bierrez often imagined what his beloved would look like. Unsuccessfully, usually. At first, he wanted someone that looked just like his sexy self, but with big tits. When he told his late mother, she frowned and belayed to her son the story of Narcissus, the beautiful mortal that looked in the water and fell in love with himself. Bierrez's mother had made sure to emphasize how Narcissus pined away at his reflection until he wasted away and died. Terrified by her words, Bierrez settled for the stereotypical tall, mysterious woman with long dark and wavy hair.

So on days like this, Bierrez enjoyed having imaginary conversations with the girl of his dreams.

"So then I says 'That's no rabid gorilla with mange, that's your aunt!'"

Doubling up with laughter, the pathetic comedian turned to his illusionary date between his little spasms, and told her not to laugh as hard or she might get stomach cramps. Apparently she thought he was hilarious too.

After about fifteen more minutes of this, the laughter suddenly stopped. Off in a clearing, a frightened chimpanzee was caught in a snare trap left by a hunter. Closing in on him was a large jaguar with a sweet tooth for primates. Bierrez was content to leave the two alone so that nature could take its natural course and he could walk away with both legs still intact, but his dream girl wasn't having any of that.

"I have to…what?" Bierrez asked her in disbelief. "Baby, you know I don't do that whole hero thing."

Cesia's forerunner clearly must have given Bierrez quite the verbal slap to the face, because the pointy-haired player winced slightly at her 'words.'

"Yeah, Yeah, you're right," apologized Bierrez. "I'm sorry, Baby. I'll take care of that mean ol' kitty cat."

Next thing Bierrez knew, he was walking over to the vicious kitty and its trapped target.

"Hey, you! Yeah, you the jag!" called out the dedicated boyfriend. "Get the hell away from the monkey!" He concluded this with an offensive hand gesture.

Five narrowly dodged paw swipes later, Bierrez had a change of heart.

"W, Wait a sec…can't we just talk about this and—Gah!"

The jaguar had pinned him to the ground. Bringing its frothing jaws closer to its prey's strawberry-scented head, the feline could practically taste Bierrez. Luckily for our hero, a great idea came to him as he saw his life flash before his eyes.

"Hang on Jaguar-sama, you really don't want to eat me or there'll be…consequences."

The beast had paused for a moment, so the future Dragonteer continued to nervously hide his fear and went on with his plan.

"That's right, big guy. You know that village not too far from here? Well it's swarming full of crazy hormonal girls that worship one incredibly handsome stud like a god—me."

The big cat seemed to be buying it, so Bierrez went on with his plan.

"If they were to find out that I was eaten by a jaguar, they would be very, very upset. In fact, I'd give them about two hours after my funeral to turn into an angry mob full of psycho femme fatales out for blood." Bierrez nodded. "Yep, while I'm sure this would normally be no problem for such a powerful creature like yourself, there's one more thing I should tell you about these girls………They're otaku."

Immediately the jaguar leapt off Bierrez, gave him an apologetic little bow with its head, and ran like hell.

Standing up to brush the dirt off his clothes, Bierrez flashed a million dollar smile towards his dream girl. However, before he could say anything witty he noticed his smoochy-woochy with a slight frown on her face and a hand pointing towards the trapped animal. Bierrez sighed and reluctantly made his way over to the spastic chimp.

"Ok, here you go…" he sighed again, cutting the rope that bound the chimp with his pocket knife. "Now get lost."

The freed chimp had other ideas. He hopped onto his savior's shoulder and presented him with a simple silver ring with a pink jewel in the center.

"The hell?" Bierrez spat. "Oh well, I'll figure this out later. I'm missing lunch by now…"

As the two started off for the Bierrez's village, the purple mist appeared once more to put a violet veil on the past.

------------------End Flashback

: A/N :

Neko: Ok, this thing is almost too long! In order to make things easier to read, I'm cutting this first Mission in half. I don't expect to do this with many of the other chapters; I just didn't expect the flashbacks to take this long. I didn't even get to Rune's and Gil's! Those will be included in Part II, along with Rath's dramatic appearance, and the villain of the day.

Thanks for reading!

--------Translation Corner-------

Neko: As promised, here's the English translation of the foreign words I used. If I ever get any of these wrong PLEASE CORRECT ME. I love learning new languages, but I'm prone to slip-ups too.

Shounen Ai (Jap.) 'Boy love', malexmale pairing

Itai (Jap.) 'Ow', 'ouch', an expression of pain, etc.

Bishounen (Jap.) 'Pretty-boy', a good-looking guy, Half the cast of Dragon Knights

Chibi (Jap.) 'Little', 'tiny', sometimes used to describe super-deformed characters

Otaku (Jap.) An obsessed fan of something, usually anime/manga