Right so hi to everyone! This story in AU. As in everyone is human and everyone is in college because I say so. This has all kinds of slash. Don't like? Don't read. Enjoy!
(Disclaimer: I own the situation and even some of the dialogue, but the people aren't mine. I promise to be careful and clean them up when I am done playing.)
He watched. It was all he could do. After all, it wouldn't be polite to intervene, and he had to be polite. Manners were a necessity of life. Especially for a Malfoy.
So yes, all he did was watch. He watched his best friend Harry Potter and Harry potter's boyfriend, Cedric Diggory. They were sickening really. Every third word out of Cedric's mouth was baby. As if once wasn't enough.
"I love you baby. So much." Cedric said giving Harry those gooey eyes that made Draco want to gag.
Harry just smiled really big and hugged Cedric. Draco got up suddenly. He couldn't watch this. He'd seen it before at any rate. He'd seen it when Harry had dated Blaise Zambini. He'd seen it when Harry had dated Ron Weasley. He'd seen it when Harry had dated Luna Lovegood. He'd seen them all crash and burn too.
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"I broke up with Blaise Draco. He was creeping me out. He calls at all hours of the night. I can't get him to go away. Draco, you were right. I wish I had listened to you."
"It's ok Harry. I promise it'll be ok. Do you want to spend the night? Just in case you know."
"Could I? I don't know if it's safe to go home."
"I told you not to tell him where you lived."
"I know…."
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Blaise had blamed Draco for the break up. He didn't even yell at Harry, but he had tried to beat Draco into a bloody pulp. That had been interesting. Harry had immediately gotten a new love interest. It seemed that Harry just couldn't keep his hands off the male population.
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"Ron was a jerk."
"He was."
"You said he was didn't you?"
"I did."
"Why do I never listen to you?"
"I really don't know."
"Maybe I should start dating girls."
"Maybe."
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And so Harry had dated girls. When the boy decided he was bisexual Draco didn't know. They hadn't talked for a while after Ron. Harry had done some horrible things in that time. Draco didn't blame him as he himself had been pretty horrible. In fact, that was the first time Harry saw him cry. They yelled at each other for hours after that. And then Harry had gone off. They didn't talk for weeks. Draco didn't know what happened, but when he and Harry finally talked again, Harry was already shacked up with Lovegood.
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"Do you really love her Harry?"
"I don't know."
"I don't like her…she isn't the kind of person I want to see you with."
"There's nothing wrong with her Draco."
"Harry…you said yourself you didn't know if you loved her. Curiosity doesn't make a relationship."
"I don't care about your opinion Draco. Can't you just stay out of my love life!"
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Harry broke it off with Lovegood too. After, of course, Draco and Hermione had had a row over letting Harry make his own decisions.
Couldn't they just understand that Draco was trying to help? Was it his fault he knew that Harry didn't love these people, even if Harry believed he did?
Harry cried after each breakup. Draco hated watching it, but in some sadistic way he liked knowing one more person had failed in keeping Harry Potter.
Harry had apologized. The row about Lovegood had threatened to tear them apart, but somehow they'd gotten back on track.
And Harry settled for staring at Remus Lupin in History class. It seemed Harry had a crush. An unattainable one at that. Draco encouraged it too. What harm could an unattainable crush do after all?
And then Harry fell in love again. With a perfectly attainable boy. His name was Cedric Diggory. Draco tried to convince Harry that Cedric wouldn't be worth it. Wasn't he moving anyway? Didn't he have a bad relationship with his parents? Wasn't there something!
Draco's attempts had failed. School let out with Harry Potter fully in love with one Cedric Diggory. Everyone thought it was cute. They flaunted their relationship with no embarrassment. Draco cringed at the pictures of the two kissing that they kept everywhere in sight.
And now here they were. Harry and Cedric were happy on all accounts. Draco wasn't speaking with Harry. No, Draco was thinking. Thinking of something he never thought possible, and he wasn't sure he was comfortable with it either.
Could it possibly be?
No.
Never….but maybe?
Draco chose to ignore it for the duration of the summer. That he did successfully. Then something struck a nerve. Harry was going to leave school? What?
Hermione was telling him things that didn't make sense. He rushed from his apartment to Harry's flat. His knock on the door was loud and angry.
Harry opened the door slowly.
"What the hell Harry!"
Harry gave him a confused look. "Weren't we not talking Malfoy?"
"What's this I hear about school?" Draco was enraged.
Something sparked in Harry's eyes. "You know what? No. I refuse to talk about this with you. You always yell at me for my mistakes, and I won't take it anymore!" Harry tried to close the door.
Draco stuck his foot between the door and the jam. "Now that's not fair. Don't I get my chance to speak?"
"No. You don't. Why should I let you? I know what you are going to say already, and I don't want to hear it. You are a bastard Draco. I talked to my aunt about us. She told me that you weren't a very good friend. I believe her. You always put me down. I can't take it."
"Well, your aunt is a bitch Harry. You want to know why I yell? You want to know why I rage? It's because I care. Tell your aunt that. I bet you told her every bad thing I've ever done. Did you mention the good stuff? Huh? I admit I am screwed up. I do because I know I am. But so are you Harry fucking Potter. So. Are. You." Draco slammed his fist into the door. His breathing was ragged. Why was Harry doing this to him? He felt the tears coming.
"You can't call my aunt that. You are way too screwed up Draco. Just leave." Harry slammed the door. Draco had forgotten he'd moved his foot.
He laid his forehead against the door and sobbed. He knew Harry was still standing there.
"I can't bear to see you with anyone else Harry. I get too jealous.
I rant and rage because I get scared. I don't want to get too close.
And as fate would have it Harry, I care more than you know.
Because Harry, I love you. Can't that be enough?"
And Draco ran. He ran as fast as he could away from the flat on the outskirts on London. He ran like the hounds of hell were after him. Tears blurred his eyes, and he slipped a few times. Malfoy dignity wouldn't let him stop though. So he didn't.
It hurt to breathe now. He felt like any second he was going to cough up a lung. He couldn't stop though. He couldn't let anyone catch him. He was loathe to explain himself, but there was his apartment building. There was safety. Did he dare?
He felt faint and decided quickly that he needed to rest. So up to his apartment he went. There Hermione still waited for him.
"Harry called. He wants to know what you meant. What you meant by 'I love you.'" She said her voice laced with all kinds of caution.
"Hermione…"
"He said you'd never said it so outright before."
"I can't talk about this now Hermione. I just can't."
And he didn't. He dragged himself to his bedroom, and he fell into bed. He cried silently.
Fate had it out for him. That was the only explanation.
He didn't know what time it was when he woke up. He knew it was night, the windows were dark. He groaned, and stretched out his body. That was the last time he ran like that. He sat up. He could tell he looked like crap. That was never good.
He limped to the bathroom and flipped on the lights witch. The light hurt his eyes. He stood still and blinked his eyes for a moment before he felt safe enough to walk. His glanced in the mirror and cringed. He did look horrible.
He turned on the shower. First things first.
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He had cleaned up and eaten. And he had successfully avoided the blinking light of his answering machine.
He had at least six messages, but be damned if he was going to bother with them now. Life could wait. He had wounds to lick, and pride to rebuild.
But the alluring red light drew him closer. He pressed the button.
"Draco, I hope you are ok. I let myself out last night."
Hermione.
"Draco? Are you there? Honey, I am worried about you. You need to call honey. Your dad and I miss you."
His mother.
"Draco, Harry said to tell you he loves you."
Hermione.
"Draco?"
Hermione's voice again.
"Come on Draco. Pick up the phone for your friend's yeah?"
Pansy Parkinson.
"Draco. We're worried."
Hermione.
"……………"
Who was that? Just breathing…
Draco sighed. How long had he been out? He picked up the phone receiver and dialed Hermione's number.
"Hello?"
"Hermione. It's Draco."
"Oh! Thank god! We were so worried. Draco, we haven't heard from you in three days." She sounded relieved.
"Now, now Hermione, you know better than to worry about me too much. I can take care of myself."
"I know Draco. See you for lunch today? It is Saturday after all."
"Of course."
"Bye!"
He hung the phone up. He looked at the clock. It had been early morning when he had awoken, not night. It was Saturday morning.
And what a bleak Saturday it was too. He ran his hand through his hair and stared at the clock a while longer.
A knock came at the door startling him out of his reverie. He went to answer it, looking through the peep hole first. He froze. Harry. Harry was at the door.
He turned the doorknob slowly. He had to face the world sometime, but did it have to be so soon?
"Draco….I….I meant to call. Well, I did call; I just couldn't get up the nerve to say anything to your damn answering machine. Are you going to let me in?" Harry's green eyes flashed. Draco fought the urge to smile.
"Sure Harry. Just like you let me in?" Draco growled.
"Don't Draco. Don't yell at me. I am sorry ok. I just blew up. There's so much going on, and I couldn't stay clam anymore. I am really sorry."
"You know I hate that word. Sorry. It has no meaning anymore." Draco did smile now before opening the door wide. Harry stepped in and made his way to the couch.
"So you're gay now?" Harry asked. His eyes were big and round now.
"No. I am straight as a line, but even a line can be bent if pushed hard enough." Draco didn't sit by him. He didn't even sit. He paced.
"So has your line been bent?" Harry was rather dense at times.
"Is that not obvious? Shall I come over there and snog you to make it clear?" Draco raised an eyebrow.
"I think you may have to." Harry had a mischievous smile on his face.
"Harry, it's no time to joke. This is a very tense situation for me."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"
"Harry, I hope you understand I can't in all good conscious be your friend anymore. It wouldn't be fair to me, to you, to anyone." Draco gave Harry a deep searching look.
"Why not? Can't you be my friend? I love you Draco. I can't lose you. I want to be your friend." Harry cried.
"But I don't want to be yours Harry. I can't. Not when…..not when these damn emotions fuck everything up." Draco dropped to his knees on the floor.
"….Draco….I love you. Can't that be enough? Isn't that what you said? I can't give you anything else. I love Cedric too." Harry's eyes were starting to well with tears.
"I understand." Draco said, rising from the floor. He went over to the door. you just go?"
Harry nodded. As he walked out the door he grabbed Draco by the shirt and kissed him softly. "I do love you."
Draco pushed him away. "Don't." And then Draco watched as Harry walked away.
So review? Cause there is a second chapter, and it's going to take reviews for me to write it…
