Title: Sanrio Knights
Author: Acerbic
Time: Post Chosen / NFA
Rating: PG-13 (A swear word or two)
Part 7 – Touchy Feelings
Gary, Indiana
June 2007
Heart racing, I dashed into the dark parking lot after Spike, spinning this way and that trying to figure out where he'd gone. He'd been right in front of me, then POOF!
I didn't understand why he'd been in such a hurry to leave all of the sudden. It'd happened so fast that I hadn't had time to think. He'd just up and said goodbye, and walked off. After a full year of trying to find him, it was terrifying to think that I could lose him again so fast.
Damn, like Xander used to say, someone oughta bell that vampire…
"Spike!" I called his name hushed and quiet-like. No response.
"Spike!"
For about thirty seconds, I thought that I'd fallen victim to a Summers Women curse: losing Spike. I mean, he fought for and won a soul, died in a fiery combustion, and left behind a crater-sized footprint in my sister's heart, and still Buffy hadn't been able to hang onto him.
"SPI-" I turned and walked right into him, colliding with a solid wall of muscle. "-IKE! OoF!"
"What's the matter, Bit?"
"What's the matter!" I grabbed hold of his arm so he couldn't escape again, and then whacked him for good measure. "You come into my life again after four years of nothing – not a word, not a letter, not an email!"
"Don't have a computer," Spike interrupted.
"What, you've never heard of an internet café? Don't interrupt!" My finger waved beneath his nose.
"Yes, mum," he said, wearing an obedient smirk.
"I've been worried and wondering this whole time what could be wrong. What's up with you! How you're doing! It's been four years, Spike! And you want to know 'What's the matter?'!" My voice'd risen steadily in volume as I scolded him soundly.
"That's the question." Oh my, did he sound honestly perplexed.
"Why'd you leave?" I demanded.
"It was time to go?" He had a funny little smile on his lips, both amused and puzzled, like he honestly had no idea why I'd run after him.
In the shadows, Spike's expression was hidden to me. His form was a dark silhouette, and it was only the way his shoulders hunched forward, rounding toward hands shoved into trench coat pockets, that cued me into his emotional state.
"Why? You got someone important waiting for you at home?" I asked boldly. "Friends, a girlfriend, a pet cat?"
"No," he said, and it was a tiny word. A slight shake of his head accompanied the denial. He was alone. Poor Spike. Boisterous, gregarious Spike who'd never really been completely alone in his entire long existence. (Spike's history is required reading for all junior Watchers.)
"Matter of fact, I was thinking 'bout pulling up roots n' moving on," he said. "I've lingered here too long."
"Spike, what're you running from?"
"What makes you say that?" He answered a question with a question, not coming right out and lying to me, but evading.
I put my hands on my hips and gave him the look. You'd think a vampire as old would be made of tougher stuff, but Spike only held out for a few seconds before a hissing sigh of surrender escaped his lips.
"Crossed some powerful demons in LA, Bit," he explained. "A lot o' good people died, Angel's people, trying to accomplish something significant. I can't afford to settle. Gotta keep moving, always looking over my shoulder."
"That's no way to live!" I cried, shocked with the revelation. I mean The Council had known that Spike was on the move, but to hear him explain that he'd literally been running for his life, and that he hadn't come to us for help?
"Why didn't you come to us?" I asked. "I get that you might not trust Watchers-" Giles "-but if not the Council then at least me or Buffy? Willow! There's not a demon in existence that wouldn't think twice about messing with Our Pagan Lady of Light!" Okay, slight exaggeration. But it's damn close to the truth.
"I couldn't put you, or your friends in danger like that," Spike said, and the stupid stupid stupid vampire obviously believed it.
I huffed, imagining Buffy's outrage over being heroically protected – in other words, a guy making sole decisions – for her own good. Hell, it made me mad just hearing it!
"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard!" My finger thumped Spike's breastbone like a tiny stake, delivering emphasis along with anger. Spike glanced down, so I thumped him a few more times for good measure whilst launching into lecture.
"Not only do you have people who care about you, but it just so happens that it's our job to fight evil! What good are you doing anyone knowing the location and nature of a potential enemy, and keeping that knowledge to yourself!"
thump thump thump
My finger started to get sore, so I stuck my hands on my hips. "God! I expect this sort of idiocy from Angel! Not from you!" I exclaimed.
At the same time Spike released a cry of outrage. "Hey! Hittin' below the belt!"
I exhaled. "Okay, yeah, that was a low blow. No more fighting dirty. Sorry."
"You're crediting the Scoobs with a lot more like of me than there ever actually was, Bit," Spike said, sounding immensely weary all of the sudden. "'Cept for you, none of them really wanted to hear from me again."
My mouth fell open, and I stared at Spike slack-jawed. "You broke my sister's heart," I snapped before the unwise words could be stopped. "You were supposed to be the one that'd never leave her, but you did."
Spike flinched. The horrible, awful accusation hung there between the two of us, cast into an irretrievable void of hurtful words. I'd have given anything to call it back, but there was no unmaking of the moment.
"Besides, that's not true," I continued, plowing recklessly onward. Damage done. "It was Xander's idea that we find you, and you can bet that he ran it past the others first. Do you think he'd have had us chasing you for a solid year if people weren't worried about you? Cause no one's chasing Angel. You can take my word on that."
Epic silence.
"Aren't you lonely, Spike?" My tone turned to sympathetic pleading cause I couldn't stop envisioning how terribly lonely he must've been all this time, always running, without friends or companionship. It broke my heart.
"Yeah," Spike admitted with a shrug. But despite the ambiguity, I could read the poignancy in his voice and the slump of his shoulders. "Yeah, I'm lonely."
I reached out and caught his hand, tugged. "Come with us, Spike. Nothing bad will happen. You'll see. Give us a chance. A week. It'll be fun. Besides, I think maybe Peggy's into you."
He hesitated, so obviously tore by indecision, that I found myself holding my breath. "Pleeeeaaaassssseeeee?" I whined, resorting to dirty tactics, wide teary eyes and a trembling lower lip.
Spike caved. An unwilling smile tugged his lips. He'd never been able to resist that look, not when I was 14, and not now. "Okay, yeah, I'll hang around, but just for a week. Alright?"
I squealed and threw my arms around his neck, hugging him so hard that a ridiculous sheepish grin engulfed Spike, and he held me safe.
"As an honorary member of The Sanrio Knights, we already have your code named picked out!" I gushed. "Badtz Maru!"
Spike gazed at me, quizzically quirking his brow. "Badtz Ma-who?"
End Part 7.
