(A/N: Well, by popular demand of my friends and the few reviews- I love all my reviewers so much! To FinRox: It's so weird having your little sister review!- I've continued this. I had the one-shot songfic, then the two-shot... Now I'm not sure how far this thing will go. It really has a plot I think, in a vague sort of way... I like sticking with U2 songs because I love the band so much... As if you couldn't tell. But I'm not totally sure which songs I should do always... Whatever, they have a few hundred songs I can pick from! Tell me how long this should be in a review please...)
Disclaimer: I don't own Maximum Ride, isn't that obvious though? And I don't own the song "Kite." I do however own this piece of bubble gum I'm chewing right now... Other than that, I don't own very much!
Did you ever feel like… something isn't right? It's this feeling like you can't help what is gonna happen when you know something is wrong. You hope that things will change, and yet… hope that things will just go so you can see what will happen. You want to see what the effects everything will have on your life.
Something is about to give
I can feel it coming
I think I know what it means
I'm not afraid to die
I'm not afraid to live
and when I'm flat on my back
I hope to feel like I did
I've felt this sort of apprehension for… well, forever I think. But now it's become more menacing. I want to tell the others, but I'm afraid of how they'll react. And there's one more thought: what if telling them quickens how fast whatever is coming occurs? What if not telling them accelerates it? What if we wait for this bad thing forever and it never comes? What if it isn't bad?
I need to know how to stop this because I just know that whenever this thing starts, we're in trouble.
And you know those sudden decisions I make; the ones that are memorable for being incredibly bone-headed or ingenious? I just made one… And that's to talk to Fang about two things. First, I'll go for this fear thing, the apprehension. And while doing that, I'll work up the courage I need for the second: tell him that I like him a lot.
'cause hardness, it sets in
you need some protection
the thinner the skin
You know what he said? Well, I'll tell you I guess. He said I- being Maximum, the ultimate- don't really need anyone. That the white-coats made me to get by on my own… I didn't get a chance to say that I liked him… I said I felt empty and needed someone. He didn't get it obviously. He's so smart, yet so dumb! But maybe he did get what I was saying… Maybe he doesn't like me that way…
Yeah, this is just great… This is just perfect. Then why Fang do I feel so empty? Where's the logic to that one? I thought to myself. Why do I feel like I need you? Didn't he ever feel like he needed someone? Probably not; he was Fang the Loner. He needed no one ever. Well, I needed someone; I wasn't like him. We were opposites.
I want you to know
that you don't need me anymore
I want you to know
you don't need anyone, or anything at all
I don't know what to do anymore. It's like I've hit this roadblock or something and there's nothing I can do to avoid it.
That's my paranoia at work for you. That's what Fang told me about my little apprehension that something was happening. Well, more or less that's what he said. He didn't really say it in so many words.
I just don't know how to choose anymore. I mean, recently all my choices have had results that suck. I think I'll just go with it from now on. You know, not look ahead anymore; do things for today.
Who's to say where the wind will take you
Who's to say what it is will break you
I don't know, which way the wind will blow
Who's to know when the time has come around
Don't want to see you cry
I know that this is not goodbye
I don't know what is gonna happen to the Flock now. I mean… If I sit here and make snap decisions, not caring about the future but about what the immediate consequence will be; what's the effect going to be? Will the Flock suffer? Obviously thinking things out like I've been doing isn't helping, so…
This is so hard and confusing. I'm not sure what to do anymore. I need the Flock, but do they need me? What would happen if I went away? Would they get by? Would they even miss me? That was my most recent thought. It was to run away from them again… but this time it'd be for good.
In summer I can taste the salt in the sea
There's a kite blowing out of control on a breeze
I wonder what's gonna happen to you
You wonder what has happened to me
I can almost picture it. I can see me being all alone in the world because I don't need anyone. No one would care about me, and I would care about no one. I could go back to the School if I really had to. Yeah, I do realize how crazy that sounds, but I don't know. Right now my most logical thoughts are complete nonsense, so if I just let the nonsense guide me… Does that make any sense?
Then I can see the Flock. On one hand they're happy and sitting on a beach. Angel is swimming with the fish, talking to them. Gazzy and Iggy are building this humungous sandcastle and talking about blowing stuff up with some homemade bombs. Nudge is talking her head off to no one in particular as she floats in the cool, clear water; then she starts to sing and splash with Angel. And then Fang is just sitting there… alone and perfectly content.
On the other hand they've broken apart after I left. If Max can go on her own, then so can we, would be their logic. And I can see them struggling to get by… almost dying… Erasers chasing them… white-coats poisoning them, dissecting them-
I cut myself off.
I'm a man; I'm not a child
a man who sees
the shadow behind your eyes
I've figured it out I think, I hope. With another snap decision, I'll stay with them. That way none of us are alone. And we'll save the world eventually. But first I've got this crazy idea to take care of. I'm going to actually tell Fang I like him this time. I won't hint at it, I won't chicken out. This time I will tell him. And that's final. It's yet another one of those crazy decisions that are idiotic or brilliant. And not knowing what is gonna happen is just killing me on the inside.
Who's to say where the wind will take you
Who's to say what it is will break you
I don't know, where the wind will blow
Who's to know when the time has come around
I don't want to see you cry
I know that this is not goodbye
I did it! I wasn't a chicken. I walked up to Fang, sat next to him on this scrawny tree branch and said that I really, really, really liked him. And he smiled. And I was happy inside. I'd told him I liked him finally, and he had smiled. I took that as a good sign, the silence though was kind of awkward.
"Max," he said quietly after what seemed like decades of silence, "I've loved you since… well, forever." My jaw must have dropped. "You'll think that I'm crazy, but I was always afraid to tell you I guess. I was afraid of what you'd say… how you'd react… of rejection." For the first time ever, I think Fang really rambled. I would've let him go on and on, but I had a better idea. I kissed him instead. Yeah, that's no type-o or anything; I actually kissed Fang… on the lips… and he kissed me back… It was better than anything I'd ever experienced.
And to think I actually thought of leaving this behind! What was the thinking behind that idea?
Did I waste it?
Not so much I couldn't taste it
Life should be fragrant
Roof top to the basement
The last of the rocks stars
When hip-hop drove the big cars
In the time when new media
Was the big idea
What was the big idea
