"Come on Kisame let's you and I start slicing the fruit. People are going to start showing up at 6:30 tonight." Sasori and Kisame started digging through the fridge. Kisame had haphazardly piled a watermelon, a cantaloupe, bananas plums, grapes, cherries, oranges, kiwis, blueberries, strawberries, a honey dew, apples and pears into his arms and were taking them to the kitchen counter to have a slicing fest. Kisame loved to slice things.

"Hey Kisame, if you put that pile of fruit on your head, you'd be like one of those tropical ladies that wear the bright clothes and walk around saying 'yah mahn', yeah." Deidara couldn't see it but Kisame was glaring at him.

"Deidara, don't you have shit you're supposed to be doing?"

"You're no fun Kisame, you must have corn shoved up your ass and fruit piled up to your neck, yeah." Deidara said and he left to help Itachi in their room.

"Deidara, check it out, the new Hotel Collection sheets I got online. Touch them! 800 thread count combed Egyptian cotton…in slate gray." Itachi was thrilled.

"Ooooh, it is combed cotton, yeah. Wow Itachi I may just have to get in bed with you tonight, yeah." Deidara laughed preciously, he loved making comments like this. Itachi's eyes started burning, the rage pill wouldn't hold back what was about to happen.

"GET THE HELL ON YOUR SIDE OF THE BAMBOO DIVIDER! DON'T YOU EVER SAY ANYTHING LIKE THAT TO ME AGAIN YOU STUPID ASS! DO YOU HEAR ME? GOD! I HATE YOU! YOU ARE SUCH A BASTARD FUCKING DUMB ASS! Hey, will you come help me put this fitted sheet on?" Itachi screamed in his fit of rage. Of course, he always needed help with the fitted sheet.

"Hey morons! Quit screaming and get to the store!" Sasori yelled from the kitchen.

"Dannaaaaaa! We can't pick anything up until 4:30 and we're cleaning, yeah!" Deidara yelled back. And so Itachi and Deidara resumed their cleaning peacefully.

"Kakuzu, you're doing it wrong, really! You don't call people and say 'hey are you coming to the super cool Akatsuki football party tonight'!" Hidan rolled his eyes at Kakuzu.

"Oh whatever! At least I'm not saying stupid shit like, 'this is Hidan of Akatsuki and I'm calling to confirm your presence at our football party and may I wish you my holy blessing'. God, Hidan as if!" Kakuzu combated him.

"Shut-up! Seriously, you obviously don't have any phone skills, you would have made a shitty receptionist had you gotten that job you applied for before we joined Akatsuki!."

"Oh take that back! You pray before you do ANYTHING and you do your Jassin ritual stuff like ever 12 minutes." And their arguing continued until Kakuzu had to leave an answering machine message.

"Wow! Zetsu I'm so excited you and I get to fill the ice coolers together, that has got to be a pretty important job. I want to be the best Akatsuki there ever was and if it means helping you do this so we throw a great party tonight well then I can't wait and I really hope that we find all the ice we need and I'm just so excited that…" Zetsu cut Tobi off.

"Um Tobi, be glad we got ice, it's an easy job, but don't forget, we have to do a kitchen makeover and turn our place into a football loving paradise." Zetsu told him. Tobi glowed all over, we he glowed as much as a swirly faced guy could glow.

"Oh, I can't wait to work in the kitchen! Zetsu! We are going to have the best party kitchen ever! And you know what I watch the Home and Garden Network like all the time! I have some terrific sports themed decorating ideas. Hey! Maybe we could start now! Oh my! I should teach you hold to fold napkins into swans and…" Tobi continued to ramble happily as Zetsu tried his best to ignore him.

In the kitchen there were rinds of fruit flying all over the place as Kisame and Sasori sliced and diced the hell out of fruit. The next step would be to arrange it all cosmetically according to color on Sasori's fruit plates he picked out at Pottery Barn.

"Itachi, what are you wearing tonight, yeah?" Deidara asked putting the finishing touches on his side of the room.

"What turns Dana on the most, jeans, these nice fitting loose cotton pants which accent my hips, these Nike pants which I have to say my ass looks so good in these, or something else?" Itachi wanted to know. Deidara was not amused.

"You stay away from Dana, yeah. Dana is MY sister and my favorite girl in the whole world, yeah. You aren't going to break her heart, yeah!" Deidara argued.

"You're right! I'm not going to break her heart because I'm genuinely in to your sister and if you would let me make out with her you'd see that! Now tell me which pants to wear!" Itachi demanded. Deidara sighed.

"Wear jeans because I'm wearing my Nike pants tonight and that long sleeved shirt with the t-shirt over it and you can't have that look, yeah." Deidara told him. Itachi agreed that the jeans would be okay and the fitted Calvin Klein green V neck shirt would be perfect as well, Besides they had to look good when they went to the store…