Disclaimer: Weiss isn't mine. Shocker, I know.

Heart's Truth

Chapter 5

Yohji stared at the bottle in his hand, barely aware of his surroundings. The past two weeks had become a blur. When he left Sai's apartment, he'd gone straight home and gotten so drunk it took him a full day's recovery. But that didn't stop him from drinking the next day. Or the next. Or the next. As a matter of fact, Yohji wasn't sure if he'd put anything in his body that wasn't alcoholic or laced with nicotine. He vaguely recalled someone giving him a sandwich, but he couldn't be certain.

Knowing he couldn't stay at his apartment the whole time, he'd gone to his office during one of his semi-sober moments and made a few calls, rescheduling appointments and such. Then he'd found a bar in a neighborhood that he hoped no one would consider checking. "No one" being a certain head of a certain covert organization of assassins. Damn that kid has a talent for knowing when I'm like this though. I wonder if he's psychic and just hasn't told me?

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It was taking Schuldig longer to find Yohji than he had anticipated. He hadn't come back to the bar, and much to his worry and fear, he wasn't spending a lot of time at his apartment or his office. He knew Yohji was visiting these places because he could see things had been moved around. But he couldn't pin the man down.

Two weeks. It had been two weeks since Yohji left his apartment after confessing his love. Schuldig let him go, thinking he was doing the right thing for both of them. After all, he was still watching his back for Esset and it wouldn't be fair to drag Yohji into his messed up life.

But all his righteous reasoning was overpowered by his need to be with Yohji. He was physically hurting from the separation. He couldn't sleep or eat. He needed Yohji.

I have to find him. I'm falling apart.

Schuldig was wandering through the lively streets of the city, the nightlife in full swing. He walked with his head down, not knowing where he was going and only looking up to cross streets. He was reaching out with his mind, just in case Yohji would be around here, but he'd lost hope. He was doing it more to keep from feeling lonely at this point.

He looks too much like him.

Schuldig's head came up and he looked around, scanning the people walking by. I swear that was his voice.

Why did he let me go?

He picked up his pace as he headed in the direction he sensed the anguished thoughts.

I have to get out of here. Maybe I'll just go away for awhile.

Schuldig was in a full run now, pushing people aside as he closed in on the voice in his head. As he prayed that he wouldn't be too late he saw a figure emerge from a bar, sandy blonde hair tied back, leather jacket, sunglasses and a cigarette hanging from his lips.

"Yohji! Don't go!"

Yohji turned at the sound of the voice and he saw Sai come to a stop just a few feet from the entrance, chest heaving.

"Sai. What are you doing here?"

"I've….been looking…for you." Schuldig took a few moments to get his breathing back to normal then he stepped in closer and lowered his voice. "I need to tell you something. Can we go someplace and talk?"

"No. Tell me what you have to say right here."

Two sets of green eyes faced off in determined stares. Normally, Schuldig would be more than willing to go toe-to-toe in a test of wills, but this mess was his fault to begin with so he deferred to Yohji's request.

"Fine. I was a coward. When you said you were falling in love with me I should have told you the truth right then and there."

"Which is?"

"I love you, Yohji. I can't stand being away from you. I-it feels like I can't breathe. I'm sorry I was so stupid and I know I hurt you…." Schuldig reached out and clasped Yohji's hand within his own. "….I'll do anything to make it up to you."

"Anything?" Yohji pulled his hand out of Schuldig's grasp and turned his back to the man. "Let me think about it."

Yohji didn't look back to see Sai's reaction. He just kept walking and disappeared down the first safe-looking alley he could find and waited. He was confident he managed to present a calm and indifferent posture on the outside even though his heart was pounding within his chest.

Schuldig just stood there for several moments. He was fighting every instinct he had to run after Yohji and beg him to choose anything but this. Anything but being separated from him. He would submit to torture of any kind as long as he could be with Yohji.

"Hey there, handsome. Want to join me in the club?"

The slurred voice and the stench of alcohol brought Schuldig back to reality and he just walked away. He eventually got tired of holding his body up and hailed a cab for home.

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Schuldig made his way up the three flights of stairs to his apartment. He was so despondent that he didn't notice the figure leaning against the wall a few doors down, smoking a cigarette.

"So I've thought about what you said."

Schuldig's head whipped around to see Yohji approaching him, his face betraying none of his thoughts. But his eyes…his eyes were glistening, holding all of Schuldig's hope within them.

"And I have a question. Why were you scared?"

Yohji stopped within a foot of Schuldig and green eyes bore into him. He couldn't hold the gaze so he looked to the side, his cheeks warm from the scrutiny. He hated to lie to Yohji about his true reason for being scared, but he had no choice. He spoke the truth when he said he was willing to do anything to get Yohji back.

"I was….shocked by what you said. No one has ever said that to me before. I was scared that if I said it too….maybe I didn't hear you right, or maybe it was just a cruel dream."

Yohji guided Schuldig to face him and his fingertips brushed a rosy, warm cheek. He allowed a small smile to show before he reached in and kissed Schuldig tenderly.

"I am real, Sai. And I do love you."

"Yohji…"

"Shhh…." A whisper of a kiss between them and Yohji spoke again. "So are you still willing to do anything I ask, Sai?" Schuldig nodded his head. "Good. Because the only way I will take you back is if you promise to love me until I tell you to stop."

He swallowed hard as he gazed into the mesmerizing green eyes that had captured him the first night they met at the bar. He had no choice. He was at the mercy of his heart which he had unknowingly given to the former assassin.

"I promise, Yohji." His voice was a whisper in the quiet hallway. "I will love you and be yours for as long as you will have me."

Yohji kissed the trembling lips, but this time it wasn't tender. It was a passionate and fierce kiss to seal the promise Schuldig had made. They fumbled their way into the apartment, never losing contact with one another. And as Yohji laid Schuldig on the bed and buried him with his own body, he recognized a warm feeling within his chest. He had found something to be part of again.

To be continued…