Sometimes it's just easier not to care.

I don't let myself get bogged down by what could have been. There's no sense in it. What happened, happened. If I don't like it, I learn from it. Dwelling on the past isn't exactly helpful.

It also lets me ignore the guilt.

I hate having to think back and tell myself, "if only you had done this, if only you had realized that..." It makes me realize that my mistakes affect others. Drastically.

I don't want anyone to die. If I become a better leader, they'll survive.

It's so troublesome, though...