AN/ oh dear. I just realised I made a terrible mistake. I forgot to reply to the reviews for the past chapter AS WELL as the reviews for the last chappie of the first TF&TEND.

Apologies to anyone who was a little scared when I made a bit of a scene telling people that they cant have cameos. Ok, here's the deal, if you asked for one in the first TF&TEND, but you didn't get one, you shall receive one. There are some others that I will give cameos too, mainly as a returned favour cos they put me in their fics. Thanks heaps guys for listening to what I said. (, Sorry if I got a bit scary.

Ok, now time for reviews. hey hey, guess what! TF&TEND no. 1 has 300 reviews! Happy happy happy, I am so happy! Thankyou all! ( As for this fic, the numbers are well on their way!

Ok, now down to business.

Robyn the Pirate: hey dude. Sorry I got a bit scary. I wasn't really talking to you when I went all weird and kind of screamed my message. I did promise you and Norman a cameo, so you shall receive one. Tell Norman that we will have lots of random objects for him to juggle. As for Sam's bath toys, Barbies all the way! Water pistols, hmm, perhaps I should supply the hobbits with a few and see what happens. *Laughs evilly*. Would you mind if Jack Sparrow and Will Turner borrowed your boat? The pink hobbit? Cos it sounds like a way cool boat. erm, I mean ship. Lol. Anywhoosies, thankyou a bazzilion times to you and Norman for the reviews. Enjoy this silly, unhinged chapter! (

Mr Bean: still here eh? You are very welcome. I really love writing, and for someone to say such nice things about it as you do makes me feel very special indeed. ( And the ballet, mwa haa haa! I feel some evil thoughts coming on. perhaps you can sit with Arwen and Leggie. *Laughs evilly* as for the 'so called' sad fic, I'm probably not going to bother putting it up cos its rather dry, plotless and boring. But if you so desperately want to read it, I'll finish it and email it to you. And who says I'm not planning on killing Mr Bean with an Arwen Stunt? Mwa haa haa. Nah, perhaps not. as for the glue, that idea was born out of pure insanity. Also I was almost temped to do it to my sister once. anyway, enjoy this chappie!

Paladin Dragoon: thankyou. ( Very pleased you think I did myself proud. :D tell Loki he's very welcome, your mum will love the frame I'm sure. Hope this fic passes your criteria and you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Saturndragon: moi? A torture genius? Thankyou. (. As for the waitress, I happen to think it would be very cool indeed if she really could speak all those languages. And the ice cube undies. Hehe. My mum told me she did that to a guy at camp once, when he pissed everyone up. The only thing with that was that she was supposedly one of the camp leadery instructor people. Hehe cracks me up when I think about it. XD and seeing as how you asked nicely, in your review in the last chappie of the other fic, I might consider squeezing you in. but only after anyone who didn't get a cameo before has had one. That's only cos you got to come to the party for the entire thing and some people asked to come but didn't get to. Anywho, thanks lots of bunches of yummy bananas.

Aelimir: no, it's not over yet! And guess what, I did get 300 reviews! Yay, which makes me very very happy! Thankyou for your ever-faithful reviews. Enjoy this chapie, hope it's satisfactory. Lol

LotRseer3350: not over! Not by a long shot! You want to be in the sequel? Hmm, I'm only going to say yes cos u asked me before I told everyone no more people; also I'm dying for more chapters of your fic. Hehe. And I don't get what you mean when u said Hex left u behind. *Shrug* I have no idea. Sorry. ( Anywhosies, I'm updating here, you owe me an update! :D

Inweofnargothrond: twins. *sigh* grr, my sis apparently saw the ROTK trailer on telly a few days ago, while I was on the computer writing the next chapter for you guys. She said she saw some dude with long dark hair give Aragorn a sword. *Shrug* could have been Halbarad. Or then again, she could have been an annoying little turn and telling a huge fib. I've seen Ned Kelly! Maybe it's just me, but the only things that really make it watchable are the fact that Orlando and Heath Ledger are in it. But then again, I did kinda learn about stupid Ned Kelly in grade 4. Every Australian knows the story inside out. It was rather dry and kinda lame, but Orli made it ok. Actually, he made me watch it four times. Hehe. POTC was WAY better tho, perhaps even bordering on better than LOTR, only problem with it was that there were no hobbits in it. ( I'm not particularly fond of movie Arwen either. Liv Tyler's cool and all, and Arwen is certainly a kick ass woman, but Glorfindel was better. and the credits. In TTT, Cate Blanchet's name is way before Orlando's and Galadriel got like, three minutes screen time. Oh well, nothing we can do about it. I'm not sure what colour Mark the spatula is, you'll have to ask Laura. but lime green IS very cool. My room is lime green. Hehe. And the underwear ice cube, that idea came about when my mummy was telling me about a time when she was one of the leaders at a summer camp thing and this other camp dude was annoying everyone. So she and some other people stole all his undies and froze them in an ice cream container full of water and served them to him on a silver platter at breakfast. Hehe. And I've never had chocolate chip pancakes. Hmm, usually have em with maple syrup. Yummy. Mmm, even tho people keep telling me not to lick it off the plate when I'm done. Hehe. Oh damn, I always end up rambling and wasting everyone's time when I reply to reviews like this. oh well, such is life. (Watch out for that line in Ned Kelly) enjoy this chappie.

Kawaii Elf Girl: if you don't want TF&TEND to end, than end it shall not. Hah, I will tell Mr Bean that you'll hire Legolas to shoot him. That was he'll be dead and we can go and huggle Legolas. I want to play paintball, say, that gives me an idea. Thanks! And I'm sorry, no more parties, the ballet! And other crazy places. Mwa haa haa. Cya!

Legolas Stalker: I'll take that to mean Mark is pleased with his cameo. ( Birthday hat for Mark, what colour? Green?! Kewel. Go Monty Python, its one of my most favourtist movies too. POTR and LOTR included. Pleased you liked the last chapter. Oh yes, and who said it was Elrohir and Elladan that dyed Leggie's hair red? It could have been someone else. mwa haa haa. But I'm sure Leggie will be glad of the rubbing alcohol. Unless I persuade him to keep his red hair for a while. And you didn't offend me, I speak no Spanish what so ever. But the waitress does! (. And you probably know more German than I do. Hehe. Isn't Leggie clever?

Marissa03: ack! No, alas I do not speak elvish. Not very well anyway, I know a few phrases and I don't know whether they're in Sindarian or Quenya. Heh. and I don't speak much German either. Only really as far as the eighth grade syllabus goes. Glad you're enjoying this pointless piece of silly writing

Lolly: hmm, I wonder what did happen to Bory and Haldir? Hmm, I think I shall need to investigate that. Pleased you liked the last fic, hope you find this one as funny, hopefully. ( And the underwear! Whooo! As long as no one does that to me, I shall be happy. Enjoy this chappie!

Sugaricing: why a teabag, well, to tell the truth, I'm not really sure. And everyone makes Leggie to only sane one. Here, he is sort of sane most of the time and occasionally he goes weird and crazy. :D. strange smart idiotic person. Hehe, sounds like me, if yu get rid of the smart bit. Lol. Pleased you 'luved it to bits' enjoy this strange, unhinged chapter!

Snowmane: you bet! Here is the sequel! Is every body happy? Yay, that's good. Thankies a bazzilion for the reviews, they make me very happy and when I'm very happy, I tend to write chapters quicker. X)

Loud-mouth-of-sauron- or- Katz: hehe, love the pen name chum. And thankies for the advice, I did change the rating; it wasn't really suitable was it? Hehe. Funny, glad you think so. ( Have a laugh at this chappie then tell me what you think.

Banx: who says I'm not going to be able to reply to all those wonderfully goodyish reviews? Mercy peak? What's that? Oh, something with Craig parker in it right? Ooh, I found the cutest piccy of him the other day *dies* hehe, so very very cuteyish. I have no idea what mercy peak is actually about and I have never been to New Zealand. Beats me whether all doctors are like they are on telly. My grandma was a nurse in NZ years ago tho, and she's cool. Feather hat! That might have almost been the best bit in POTC; the sword fight was better tho, that was great. And even tho, as you said, I AM up to my belly button in reviews, I love it, and I WILL reply (will, hehe, will.) and we play hide and seek too. Murder in the dark is just hide and seek in the dark with a strange name. Glad you liked your, erm, lick. Hehe. I'll make sure I tell Haldir that you have a cat bite that needs kissing better. ( Yay all caught up. Simon and Garfunkle are kewel. Haldir is better tho, even tho I'm not sure whether the bootyful elfy can sing. *shrug* ok, enough rambling on my part, get on and read the chapter! And I told you I would reply! ha

Luna-lovegood-fan: no, no not ended. Not by a long shot. Gandalf in his dress. *Shudder* mentally scared now. Happy, happy, happy! Happy you reviewed; hope you are happy with this chapter. As you might have guessed I like the word happy. Toodles

Holly: no, you didn't forget to review; I think I must have just forgotten to reply. Naughty Lamoo. *Smacks head with keyboard* ok, I'm over it. And I agree with you completely, Leggie is not a Wus! Not a wus, no way. I want a will turner badge, NOW! Mwa haa haa, hmm, pointy.and you're not alone, it would be cruel for me to say that in POTC Johnny Depp kinda stole the show, but I think he kinda did. Even tho Orli is still wonderful. Oh yes, guess what! I got 300 reviews! Yay, so very, very happy! Thankyou for YOUR reviews. (

Elfchick123/Elfchick456: sorry, combining your replies here. Saves me from having to type so much when I really want to get on and finish these replies and write this chapter. You like the ballet idea? Oh that's good. *Sigh* my strange sister, you might also have to fight Banx for Haldir. But then again, there's plenty of him to go around. :P and I played rock paper scissors and lost. with the rock. grr. Glue. have been very tempted to do that to my sis on a number of occasions. But then discovered we didn't have any pva glue. *sniff* anywho, enjoy this chappie!

Hex of the Unseelie: somehow, I don't think I'd call this fic beautiful. Somewhat insane really, but I'm glad I made you feel better. And yes, real men do use swords, not gunses. And real elves use bows. *Drool* enjoy!

XHellsFireX: wow, very pleased indeed that you think this fic is so funny. My parents have been certain I'm insane ever since I discovered the wonderful world of Fanfiction. And Leggie's hair should be ok, he's very resilient you see, and he'll probably be back to himself in a day or two. And the evil person who put glue and ink in Leggie's shampoo is yet to be uncovered. Mwa haa haa. And yea, I am Australian. Go Leggie! And for future reference, I don't mind strange reviews. Usually they're more entertaining to read than regular ones. So, enjoy this chapter, and.. Squirrel!

Raven Demon: Ned Kelly huh? Hmm, it's pretty good, but the only reason its worth seeing is cos it has yummy guys in it. Ooh, I want a Legolas standee. Never actually seen one, but meh. Robin Hood? I loved Men in tights, that was great. And thankyou a bazillion times for the cameo in your mushrooms fic. I feel so special. ( will have to return the favour. And no, I have never seen spongebob toothbrush holders. not sure I want to either.but Lego, *drool* red hair, poor ol' Leggie. I haven't actually decided when the fellowship is going to the ballet. They might go and play paint ball first. Love the idea with the hobbits in the car for five days, hmm, I think that's something for Aragorn to do. *laughs evilly* anywho, hope you like this chapter, cos I loved writing it!

Phew, that took a while. If I forgot anyone, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me.. (

Disclaimer: after spending an hour replying to reviews, Lamoo goes and eats a sandwich, which ham and cheese and tomato and chicken and lettuce and tomato sauce and avocado and mustard and mayonnaise and chips and sprinkles on it. She grins happily as she chomps down the sandwich, which she actually owned prior to her eating it. Unfortunately, unlike the sandwich, Lamoo does not own the fellowship or anything vaguely familiar. The only disturbing things Lamoo owns are herself, the waitress at the German restaurant, Gandalf's pocket pack of tissues and the deodorant that Aragorn forgot to put on that morning. All respective reviewers own themselves.

Thanks to those who voted for the new fic name. Voting will close this chapter so if you want to see this fic re named then this is your chance. If no more votes come in, this fic will be called Robin Hood, the person who has no part in this fanfiction.

Ok, enough blabbing. Here is chapter three!

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previously in TF&TEND, the adventures continue, Legolas and Aragorn convnded Gandalf to change, Legolas reminded us all why he no longer has a drivers licence, we discovered that our elf is bilingual and at the place they thought Lamoo would least likely be, she and her cronies appeared.

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"hi there Laura," said Pippin happily. "Legolas is under the table,"

Laura grinned and under the table Legolas bit Pippin on the kneecap. The hobbit yelped earning himself odd glances from the restaurant patrons.

Lamoo grinned and waltzed up. She gave Merry and Pippin a hug and sat down at the table. "what's happening? And why are Frodo and Legolas hiding under the table?"

There was a muffled grunt and then Legolas's red head emerged from under the tablecloth. "We're not hiding, I dropped my fork."

Gimli laughed heartily. "They saw you and your friends and decided to hide." He informed the authoress. "Oh, good, here's the food." He added when sever waiters and waitresses came out of the kitchens carrying plates and trays.

The waiters and waitresses put the food and drinks on the table and left without a word. Lamoo, Anelith, Laura, Nellie and Mr Bean heartily dug into the fellowship's food.

"Oy," exclaimed Legolas. "Back off, those are my pancakes." Mr Bean grinned evilly and continued to eat Legolas's pancakes. "And by the way, I thought I ordered something else."

"You did," replied Aragorn through a mouthful of bacon. "But Lamoo ate your French toast so now you have to eat the pancakes."

"I cant," muttered the elf. "He's eating them." He added, nodding towards Mr Bean, who had just finished Legolas's pancakes and was now tucking into large helping of Merry and Pippin's potato salad.

Lamoo licked maple syrup off her fingers. "Herr Ober!" she called. The waiter came over. Lamoo grinned. "Wir Möchten mehr essen bitte." She said, casting an eye back to the German phrase book lying open in the table.

"What did she say?" whispered Mr Bean to Nellie.

Nellie rolled her eyes. "She said, waiter, we would like more food please."

"Oh," replied Mr Bean.

The waiter nodded as Lamoo went through a list of every food imaginable, much to the delight of the hobbits. The waiter went through the order and Lamoo nodded in confirmation. The waiter disappeared again to place their order.

By now Anelith and Laura had dragged over some extra chairs to the fellowship's table. Lamoo and Nellie were busy talking to Merry and Pippin about mushrooms, Legolas had his head in his hands, moping while Mr Bean laughed at his hair. Laura was glaring at Mr Bean, Anelith was inching closer and closer to Frodo and he hobbit was biting his fingernails and muttering things about crazy people under his breath. As for Aragorn, he and Gandalf were having a competition, seeing which of them could blow the most bubbles through the straw in their milkshakes. Gimli was refereeing and Sam was absent-mindedly playing with his place mat with the little bits of raffia along the side.

Eventually, the food arrived and it wasn't long before it had all been eaten. Pippin belched loudly. Lamoo narrowed her eyes and let go an even bigger burp. Pippin grinned then burped again. From then on it was an all out belching contest.

Soon, everyone was all 'burped out', if it could be said. The hobbits were felling that the next time they burped; they might puke up their breakfast.

Legolas however, as with Aragorn, hadn't taken part in the contest. Legolas was halfway through another cup of lemon tea while Aragorn had a strawberry milkshake. They were discussing in hushed elvish, hunched over a bit of paper.

Anelith glanced at the bit of paper and squealed in delight. Gimli raised his bushy eyebrows. "What?" he asked. "What are you so happy about?"

"Paintball?" yelled out Frodo, reading the piece of paper. "Cool."

Legolas smiled. "Glad you think so. Because you lot are going to play paint ball this afternoon while I go and get my hair done."

"Who's paying?" Merry wanted to know.

"Why does that matter?" Aragorn wanted to know.

"Because," began Merry. "Pip and I were fired before we got our next pay check. Practically broke."

Legolas sighed loudly. "I'll shout it, if you'll all leave me alone this afternoon so I can go shopping."

"Deal," chorused the hobbits. Gandalf grinned happily and Gimli looked pleased.

"Can we come?" asked Nellie. "Paint ball sounds fun."

"Yes, it is," remarked Legolas in a bored, slightly sarcastic voice. "Go ahead. Just make sure Lamoo stays there with you." Lamoo and Nellie nodded happily. "And the rest of you can go too," Legolas informed Mr Bean, Laura and Anelith.

"I'll get the bill," spoke up Lamoo. She called out to a passing waitress and she trotted off to fetch the bill. Lamoo grinned and clicked her fingers. A couple of $20 notes appeared and she put them on the little tray that the bill came on. "Let's get going,"

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The fellowship plus Lamoo and her friends filed out of the restaurant, Legolas very much looking forward to some quality time alone, in peace and quiet, while the others were looking forward to the paintball.

"How are you guys getting to where ever you're going?" asked Sam, noticing that Lamoo was only thirteen and couldn't drive. Somehow it didn't look like any of her friends could either.

Lamoo grinned evilly again, clicked her fingers. Suddenly she, Laura, Nellie, Mr Bean and Anelith were gone.

"Let's pretend that didn't happen shall we?" remarked Aragorn. "Ok, in the car," he pulled out his sword, which he still carried everywhere, and began waving it in the air, trying to hustle the hobbits into Frodo's car and Gimli and Gandalf into Legolas's.

"Whoa, watch the paint," yelled Legolas as the sword came a little to close to the shiny silver paintwork on the Porsche.

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At last the fellowship arrived home, after taking almost twice as long than usual. They had been caught behind a silly old woman riding a donkey. She didn't seem to understand that the green traffic light meant she could move. So, the fellowship arrived home, tempers a little hotter than they had been previously.

Aragorn rummaged around in his pockets for his keys and swore loudly when he discovered he'd taken Gandalf's instead. Any normal person would ask what was wrong with Gandalf's keys. The answer simply was that the only keys on the key ring was a plastic key for the wizard's diary, the mailbox key and a spare key to Elronds's house. Attached were about sixteen key chains, varying from pink and fluffy to a little toaster that sung 'I'm a little tea pot' when you squeezed it. Aragorn continued to swear loudly and was eventually quietened by a whack in the head with a cricket bat that Legolas had found lying on the lawn.

Legolas discovered, after asking around, that none of the other members of the fellowship had their keys with them. So the elf rang the doorbell but then had a turn swearing loudly himself when he remembered he'd disconnected it the day before.

"We can climb through the window," suggested Merry, un-aware of the scene Gimli had made that morning whilst stuck in the window.

Legolas and Gimli glared at the hobbit. Aragorn however, was out cold on the front porch and Legolas was thumping the cricket bat used for the ranger whacking against his shin.

"Don't suggest it," muttered Gimli. "We'll just go through the back door. I think I left it unlocked."

Legolas usually would have screamed his lungs out at the dwarf for leaving the door unlocked. Especially after the behaviour of the party guests the night before, not to mention the pair of loony pirates that lived in their ship floating in the pool. But this time the elf was glad the dwarf had some something stupid.

Gimli led the way around the back of the house. He gasped when he saw the back door was open, muddy footprints on the ground.

All the fellowship minus Aragorn, grabbed something with which to smack the intruders with. Legolas still had his cricket bat, Gimli found a rake. Merry grabbed a loose fence plank from Haldir's side fence while Pippin grabbed a hold of a large inflatable pool toy, which so happened to be a duck. Gandalf picked up a golf club, another off item lying on the ground, and Frodo stole Aragorn's sword. Sam meanwhile was foraging in the garden shed. He nodded determinedly when he found a massive paintbrush and a roller.

Legolas went in first, the bat raised above his head, followed by Merry and Pippin and his duck. Gandalf and Gimli came next and then Frodo, Sam cowering behind him. They left Aragorn unconscious on the deck.

There were suspicious sounds coming from the living room.

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TBC

AN/ mwa haa haa! Anyone willing to guess who the intruder is? Hehe. Thankyou for all the reviews people, they make me fell very loved. Anyway, hope you enjoyed that chapter.

Don't forget to review

Love Lamoo