AN/ again, sorry about the last chapter, all the spaces between paragraphs
disappeared and made it a pain in the arse to read. Sorry. I did reload
the chapter though.
Also terribly sorry this chapter took so long. School has started again, groan, so I don't have as much free time on my hands with the horrible onset of maths homework... shudder I know I am never much good at updating regularly anyway, but please bear with me if I neglect this a little. I will try my level best not to, but if you don't hear from me for a while, you will know that I have probably been eaten by my maths textbook.
Tremendous Thankies to Nellie (nomad6) again for beta-ing this chapter. Because the elf is busy teaching Pippin to tie his shoelaces, (even though hobbits don't tend to wear shoes) Jack Sparrow and Will Turner are hers for the day.
Disclaimer: Lamoo bangs head on wall before she proceeds to explain that she owns nothing in this fanfiction, apart from some of the ideas. Ah yes, she also wishes to tell people that if they want to use elements of this story in their own stuff, that is perfectly fine with her, as long as you give her the link so she can have a read of it once its done. (
Replies to reviews at the end of this chapter as usual.
Has anyone else noticed my author notes at the beginning of this chapter seem unusually short? Hmm, never mind, maybe it's just me.
Wait, one more thing about temperatures... 40 degrees Celsius is very hot, sweaty and horrible. 30 F is about 6 C (I think it could be less)
Ok, I'll get on with it now.
Chapter 11
In the previous Chapter of TF&TEND: the adventures continue, Percy had a bit of an accident, Legolas and Aragorn discovered that Eomer can get quite irked when he doesn't get a car park, Aragorn became stuck in a new pair of pants and the ranger's car was spied for the first time in at least 25 chapters.
Legolas and Aragorn were striding briskly through the shopping centre, bags swinging wildly. The ranger had to walk very fast to keep up with the elf's long strides, but his legs were somewhat restricted by his skin-tight pants.
"Keep up Estel," Legolas called over his shoulder as he stepped onto the escalator.
Legolas looked over his shoulder to make sure that Aragorn was following but stopped in his tracks as soon as he saw that the ranger was not tagging along behind him. "Estel?" called Legolas, scanning the area. He called out Aragorn's name again before he caught sight of the ranger gawking at something shiny and black in a shop window.
The elf strode briskly over to Aragorn and found himself rolling his eyes at what the ranger was gazing at. A mannequin dressed in a large, shiny, black trench coat stood in the window. Aragorn was gazing at it with glassy eyes and Legolas could swear he saw drool dribbling out the corner of Aragorn's gawping mouth. "Aragorn?" the elf said, not sure if the ranger could hear him, being pretty sure that Aragorn was off in his own little world filled with Matrix trench coats and monopoly money. Legolas waved his hand in front of his friend's face and Aragorn snapped back to reality.
"What are you doing?" Legolas asked the ranger.
"Looking," came the simple reply. Aragorn turned his attention back on the beloved matrix trench coat in the shop window and the glassy, glazed looked appeared in his eyes again. It reminded Legolas strangely of Elrond on the verge of a temper tantrum. "Come on," said the elf. "We have to go."
"Why?" whined Aragorn, pressing his nose up to the glass.
Legolas suddenly became aware of the people sending shifty glances his way. He didn't even bother wondering why, for he was pretty sure that a grown man pressing his face up against a shop window and a blonde elf trying to persuade him patiently to follow along like a little child wouldn't be one that happened in the mall everyday. But then Legolas noticed the marks on the glass caused by people putting their noses on the glass. Many of them were too high up to have been made by little kids, and Legolas thought grimly that perhaps other grown men tended to gawk in front of the shop with the matrix coat on a fairly regular basis. However, the elf really wanted to get home so he grabbed Aragorn by the sleeve.
"Come along," he said firmly. "Or we'll be late for Haldir's dinner party," he explained slowly, as if he was talking to a foreign five year old that hadn't quite got the whole concept of the English language.
"Can I get that?" Aragorn asked, pointing to the coat in the window.
Legolas shook his head. "No Estel," he replied. "We don't have time."
"Why not!" whinged Aragorn. He saw the fleeting look of annoyance and frustration that passed over Legolas's face. "Please Legolas? Maybe it can be an early birthday present?" he suggested, using the softer, more persuasive approach to get what he wanted.
"Fine," said the elf, grabbing the ranger's arm and strutting into the store. He looked around for the sales clerk to ask if they had any of the big black coats for Aragorn to try on.
He glanced over to the counter and spied a young lady with a chestnut bob wearing a pale blue blouse and a short black mini skirt. Legolas strode over, about to speak to the clerk before she looked up and Legolas nearly had a heart attack.
"What does the nasty elf want with us preciousss?" asked the girl, and it occurred to Legolas all of a sudden that the sales girl was not a girl at all, but rather Smeagol trying a new look.
Legolas hurriedly sought to regain his composure and as soon as he got over the shock, he let his smooth, suave side come in while he politely asked Smeagol about Aragorn's beloved coat. However, he couldn't quite help not mentioning the fact that last time he saw Smeagol at work, work was at the supermarket.
"The tricksy, fat store manager saids they had to let us go," Smeagol explained, hopping up from the stool behind the counter and striding over to a rack near the change rooms. "In other words, we was fired preciouss," he exclaimed, rifting through the various sizes of black trench coat for Aragorn's size. "So we applies for the new jobs here and we gets it, oh yes we does my love."
Legolas simply nodded not sure what to say. He really wanted to know exactly why Smeagol was fired but his logical, polite side told him that he probably shouldn't ask. Then he realised that perhaps he didn't want to know.
"Get the stupid human to try these ones on," Smeagol said, handing the tall blonde elf several sizes of the same, in Legolas' opinion ghastly, coat. The elf in turn, tossed them into Aragorn's waiting arms and ushered him into the change rooms. Much to Legolas's relief, it took barley seconds for the ranger to leap out of the change room with the correct size coat.
Legolas handed Smeagol his credit card, wanting to be done with the whole trench coat business and go home. The transaction was completed in no time, and only a few minutes later, Aragorn came skipping wearing his new coat, which matched his clinging pants perfectly. Out of the store Legolas followed behind, not quite sure what to think now that he knew that he'd just spent $400 on a coat for Aragorn, who would probably get bored of it within a week.
Aragorn ran ahead to the car and waited there for a few minutes before the elf arrived. Legolas opened the door and slid into the drivers' seat. He was very tempted to just pull out of the parking space and drive away without the ranger, but his common sense told him that if he did, Lamoo would be on his tail faster than he could say his fathers full name. Mind you, that could take a while, especially with all the tricky pronunciation. The point is, that Legolas allowed Aragorn to clambour into the car BEFORE he started the engine and began driving towards home.
Meanwhile, back at the fellowship's house, the hobbits had given up on Percy, leaving the parsnip to the mercy of the pool chemicals and the thing that vacuumed up the leaves on the bottom.
Gimli was debating with himself about who could have possibly taken his yellow wool and Gandalf was in his bedroom STILL trying to decide what to wear to Haldir's dinner party. Haldir of course was going through the final stages of his makeover and Lamoo would like to assure her readers that Haldir now wishes that he had warning before the fab 5 were set loose on him.
At that precise moment, Merry and Pippin were parked in front of the TV, as usual, watching Monty Python: The Life of Brian. They had a peculiar habit of watching the endings of movies before they went back and watched the whole thing again, they were currently singing along with 'the bright side of life'.
"Always look on the bright side of death. Right before you draw your terminal breath Life's a piece of shit When you look at it Life's a laugh, deaths a joke its true You'll see its all a show Keep em laughing as you go Just remember that the last laugh is on you," sung the pair, swaying backwards and forwards to the music.
Then Pippin tried to whistle and just ended up spitting all over the TV screen, which he was sitting merely inches away from, Merry snickered and found himself being smacked over the head. Pippin giggled a bit and the other hobbit was quite surprised to see that he was over Percy the parsnip already. But then, thought Merry, Monty Python always makes everyone feel better, even Elrond during a particular time of the month.
Sam was in the kitchen, cooking, as usual. This time he was trying to follow a recipe for a weird fancy desert from a Jamie Oliver cookbook. As he cooked, he did a running commentary for anyone who might care, and even threw in a few little "Lovely Jubbleys" for effect. However, no one was listening, and no one did care, not even Frodo, for he was sitting in the study browsing the Internet. After checking each of his fifteen email accounts, he was looking for the most luxurious, most expensive hotel in Bali. Seeing as how the trip Legolas had won was all expenses paid, Frodo figured they might as well take advantage and indulge in every single thing they could get away with. After a bit of searching he found a lovely hotel on Sanur beach, actually right ON the beach with wonderful ocean views and deluxe honeymoon suites. He chose to ignore the fact that the rooms he had choses were honeymoon rooms, and only had one bed, but he didn't see why each member of the fellowship couldn't have their own room.
The hobbit grinned to himself, spun around a few times on the spinning chair before he clicked onto the msn messenger conversation that had just popped up. He made himself comfortable and found that the person on msn was Bilbo.
They discussed several things that afternoon, including Legolas's mood swings, potatoes and the collection of home movies belonging to Pippin, which currently resided at Elrond's house. Neither hobbit knew exactly what Elrond would want/or need the videos for and they were both sure that they didn't really want to find out.
Frodo heard a car pull into the drive way and said good-bye to Bilbo before he signed off MSN. He left the study and wandered out into the lounge room, just in case Legolas caught him on the Internet talking about him. Frodo told Merry and Pippin that if anyone asked, he had been in front of Monty Python the whole afternoon.
The latch on the door clicked and in sauntered Aragorn in a very happy mood. Frodo had to look twice to make sure that the black leather clad figure waltzing around the living room was actually the dark haired ranger. Legolas strode in behind, flashed a very un-interesting smile at the hobbits before he marched off to the bathroom to have a shower before Haldir's dinner party.
Just as the elf disappeared around the corner there was a crash and several swear words, some in elvish uttered by Legolas and others in some other tongue that sounded like they were being spoken by someone who had just swallowed a whole porcupine and had no throat lozenges at their disposal.
"What the !#$ do you think you were doing?!" yelled the elf, storming back into view.
Gandalf sidled around the corner behind him, red in the face, but with a blue beard. "I was walking to the kitchen to tip my paint down the sink!" he bellowed. The hobbits had all turned around and were watching the argument with interest. Aragorn ignored the arguing pair, quite used to Legolas getting pissed off at various people. The ranger pounced on the couch and quickly turned off Monty Python so he could watch cartoons.
Legolas yelled a few pieces of incomprehensible elvish at Gandalf, which none of the other fellowship members could understand. Obviously the wizard did understand parts of the very rude, very loud, very abusive sentence and reddened in the face further. The hobbits saw his hands shaking, which in turn made more blue paint slop onto his beard.
How did this happen you ask? Well, Gandalf had decided that if he wasn't allowed to wear his red cocktail dress to Haldir's party, then he would wear a blue one. The only problem was of course that he didn't own a blue silk cocktail dress. So, he did the only thing an intelligent cough cough individual would do... He painted his red dress blue.
He had just finished and had been carrying the container of blue paint into the kitchen to clean up when Legolas had strode briskly around the corner at that precise moment. The elf and the wizard bashed into each other, sending blue paint all down the front of Legolas's shirt, which was blue already, and Gandalf's beard.
Legolas didn't even bother to wait for a reply after he screamed a bit more at Gandalf until he himself was red in the face and could hear the blood pounding in his ears. He stormed off to his bedroom and as he slammed the door, several tacky ornaments toppled forwards off the shelves in the living room and smashed on the floor.
Gandalf muttered curses under his breath and stomped off to the kitchen to try and work out how to get the blue paint out of his beard.
"I think Lamoo has an unhealthy obsession with putting various coloured things through people's hair and beards," commented Merry knowledgeably. Frodo and Pip nodded in agreement before they turned back to the TV, only to find that Aragorn had turned off their precious Monty Python and was now glued to the powerpuff girls.
Two hours later, the powerpuff girls marathon ended and by them, the whole fellowship, including Legolas and Gandalf, were all crowded around the TV. In fact, the antics of the cartoon characters had somewhat of a hypnotizing effect on the group.
The last episode ended and Aragorn leapt to his feet, glancing to the clock on the wall.
"What time is Haldir's party thing?" he asked anyone who might answer.
The hobbits shrugged and Aragorn wondered why he bothered asking when he knew the hobbits never knew anything useful. Gandalf also shrugged, as did Legolas. Both elf and wizard were perfectly chummy now. Legolas taking advantage of the blue paint all over him and giving himself bright blue streaks in his hair before the paint on his shirt dried. Gandalf meanwhile, still had his bright blue beard, but had his arm slung over the elf's in a particularly friendly manner.
Gimli spoke up just as Aragorn was about to give up hope that anyone knew the answer to his question. It didn't occur to him that to find out what time Haldir's dinner party started, all he had to do was to glance at the invitation which was stuck to the fridge with a particularly ghastly magnet in the shape of pair of flippers.
"Starts in about three minutes," said the dwarf matter-of-factly.
Aragorn saw Legolas's eyes bulge when he found out that he did not have a whole two hours to get dressed. The hobbits also looked surprised, wondering how on earth they could have stayed still for two hours without noticing. Suddenly Sam leapt up in alarm and sprinted to the kitchen.
A minute later, smoke came gushing out of the doorway and the rest of the fellowship saw Sam come trudging out holding his burnt desert mournfully.
"Don't worry Sam," said Legolas. "There's some ice cream in the freezer that I bought to take to Haldir's."
Merry and Pippin exchanged worried looks, only just figuring out then what the ice cream had been for before they had eaten it. They did not want to think about how Legolas would react when he found out that the ice cream that he thought was in the freezer wasn't actually there at all. Pippin made a quick decision to tell Legolas what happened to the ice cream, because he knew that if the elf found out on his own there would be even more strife.
However, Pippin came up with a clever lie that would be believable but that would also prevent Legolas from beating the snot out of anyone. "Legolas?"
The elf turned to the hobbit and raised his eyebrows in question. "Hmm?"
Pippin nibbled on his fingernail, trying to find the best way the phrase his fib. He took a deep breath and began. "Well, I saw Jack Sparrow and Will Turner sitting on the deck of their ship eating ice cream."
"So?"
"I checked in the freezer a few hours ago for some those frozen slices of pizza from three months ago, and I didn't see any ice cream in there."
Legolas laughed. "Oh, I see, its been eaten," he said, remarkably good spirited about it all. "The pirates must have eaten it. I suspected you hobbits would actually, which is why I bought a spare tub."
Pippin sighed with relief but saw Frodo and Sam tense beside him. He didn't need to ask to know that they had eaten Legolas's spare tub of butterscotch swirl ice cream. The elf also saw the reactions of the hobbits and sighed audibly. "And it's been eaten too hasn't it?"
The hobbits all nodded guiltily.
"I hope Haldir has plenty of desert," mused Aragorn. Suddenly he noticed the clock and saw that they all had under twenty five seconds to be ready, dressed and over at Haldir's. "Will he mind if we're late?"
Legolas shrugged. "He'd better not," he replied before in a flurry of strawberry blonde hair with blue streaks, which had previously been red, the elf was gone.
The rest of the fellowship all went their separate ways and in a little under ten minutes they were all gathered in the living room, clean, dressed and pressed.
Legolas hadn't bothered to make Gandalf change from the blue dress, which was still dripping with sapphire paint. The elf himself was dressed smartly in dark trousers and the purple paisley shirt he had bought that day. Over the top he wore a smart black suit jacket and looked very snappy indeed. Aragorn had refused point blank to wear anything other than his new matrix trench coat. And the good news now was that he and Legolas didn't have to bother trying to get him out of the tight pants. Of course the ranger could have just worn some other trousers over the top, but he thought that his new, butt hugging, leg hugging, everything else hugging pants matched his coat. He had even managed to find a pair of sunnies in his bedroom, which was a miracle in itself that he had found ANYTHING in the mess he called 'creative clutter'.
The hobbits all looked radically different. Merry wore a suit of bright green velvet with a spotty yellow tie and shoes so shiny he could see his face in them. He had dragged a brush through his hair, quite a difficult task. But he had accidentally gotten the brush stuck, so now he had a brush stuck in his hair, hanging down at the back of his head.
Pippin meanwhile was garbed in a ghastly pink Hawaiian shirt and purple pants. He wasn't wearing shoes, as usual, for the hobbit held a firm belief that no matter what the circumstance, hobbit feet should be free. Sam wore a red suit with a white lacy cravat, Austin Powers style. It hurt Frodo's eyes to look at the hobbit in red. He himself was wearing the most boring, most conservative suit he could find. A brown tie matched the brown suit, which matched his brown shoes and brown shirt.
Gimli liked the colour brown, but had refused to wear it after Frodo announced that brown was his new favourite colour. Gimli wore a tuxedo, a little formal perhaps, but at least he was making an effort.
So, all dressed, pressed and pretty the fellowship marched out the door, across the lawn, was amazed by the number of cars parked in Haldir's drive way and along the street, before they, four hobbits, human, elf, dwarf and wizard, stood at Haldir's front door and rang the doorbell...
TBC
AN/ mwa haa. I have only just noticed that I often end my chapter with something to do with a doorbell. I am weird.
Anyway, sorry for the extreme un-funniness of this chapter. I hope you liked it anyway, even though it was a bit on the weird side.
Ok, now for the best bit... reviews. Grins I love them guys, keep em coming. ( It's you guys who keep this story afloat. On the other hand, they also make the hobbits and Legolas very happy. And in the moods Legolas has been in lately, keeping him happy is a very good thing.
Yoshi: Hey there. I don't recall hearing from you before, but that might have been one of those times where ff.net was all weird and deleted all my reviews... or maybe it was just me being an idiot and not remembering. I am very pleased indeedy that you liked the first TF&TEND and what has happened so far in this one. Thankyou so, so much for your review, it made my day. =) I hope you liked this chapter as much as the last ones. Oh yeah, and only one more chapter to wait until everyone finds out exactly what the fab 5 did to poor Hal-dear. Oh yes, and Legolas can take me for a massage any day. Lol. Righto, again, thanks for your review, you rock!
Banx: arg, I know! The last chapter was so screweyed up. And the problem is, I DON'T KNOW WHY!!! Which makes things very frustrating. However, I will try and re-upload it so that it is actually a little more than just a jumble of mixed up words. Sorry about that. But I am, on the other hand, VERY pleased t hear you refer to chapter 9 as 'freaking awesome'. That made me giggle and go all smiley and happy. Which is a good thing by the way... lol. And another thing, you reviews are NEVER pointless. And Long is good, the longer the better. Lol. Oh yeah, before I forget, before I write the next chapter I need to know if you don't mind battling it out with my sister for Haldir again. In other words, a cameo at Haldir's dinner party? Please say yes, but its ok if you don't, I might be able to bribe Sam into kissing Haldir.... evil laugh anyway, thankies so much for reviewing, made me veddy veddy happy it did, reading your review. But then again, reading yours always do.
Kawaii elf girl: ello ello. How's life? I am really sorry about the 'giant chapter', all the words got mushed up, and even after I re-loaded the chapter about five times I could do nothing about it but get myself all flustered and annoyed. So sorry again. Now it's my turn, thankyou for de reviewsies. Your travel-agent cameo will be coming up pretty soon...
Anelith Wood: what? Dirty mind? I don't have a dirty mind... not very often anyway. Cough cough heh. But personally I didn't think Frodo topless in ROTK was anything that special. Ok, ok, I admit to being busy thinking about Legolas at the time, but he was just a pale little skinny guy who is in need of a haircut. Sorry about that. You are however, still very welcome to smooch, attack, hug, so whatever to Frodo if you manage to catch him. Lol. Leggsie and the twins will only be too happy to oblige to your every command however, well, that's if I can convince them that anyone who's a fan and female is not evil. (Silly idiots still think I want to eat them... hang on a second... I do... ok, forget that thought). Anyway, in the case of Aragorn's tight pants, I think if the butter doesn't work to get them off then someone might have to do some vveeeeerrryyyyy careful cutting... ah yes, teachers... we have that thing in out library too. You know, where the teachers watch everything you're doing. Freaky. I wont tell the whole story, but I was doing something once and got kicked out of the library cos they thought I was doing something that I wasn't. I don't like librarians... shudder alrighty, I will get to the point now. Thanks veddy veddy much for de review, made me happy happy it did. And when I'm happy happy, I tend to update this fanfiction quicker. Lol.
Aelimir: Hope that there were not too many sick jokes in this chapter, but I have to admit that I am quite prone to them. Especially the very lame ones. Ah yes, you are very welcome to post a story similar to this. Take all the cat-food posters, rifles, light bulbs and pool toys you need. You're also very welcome to use anything else you find amusing. I am actually really flattered that you think anything in this story is good enough for you to use in your own. One thing though, you HAVE to give me the URL once it's written cos now I'm dying to see how it turns out. Hopefully your cameo should be in the next chapter, cos that's the dinner party chapter, and be prepared for some extreme Sam strangling. Lol. Don't blame you really; Sam is a bit odd, although he was better in ROTK than the other two movies. And Boromir, how on earth could I forget him? And now that the fellowship are going on vacation, they need to make sure they all look good in their swimming costumes. Grins Boromir...yay. This will be good, I love your ideas, they totally rock. And another thing, I strongly caution you NOT to try and get out of a pair of pants using butter for I have the sneaking suspicion that it probably wouldn't work too well. Perhaps some careful cutting may well be the answer. Sorry that there were also no pirated in this chapter. They will be in the next though, cos I already have that one all planned out. Evil laugh. Anyway, thankies so much for the very long and wonderfully wonderful review. You rock!
ChicagoGoth: sorry, I forgot to explain how hot 40 degrees Celsius is. Two words for it really. VERY HOT. In fact, just like it was at school today. All the classrooms and the bus on the way home all felt like saunas. Horrible. Good luck in your finals, although by the time I post this chapter up you probably will have finished. And the Aragorn pants scenario... that just struck me as a very Aragorn-ish thing to do. Wait, that is more like just something I would do... yeah. Right then, I always manage to write really long replies to reviews and all I ever do is rant and rant and rant. Quite pointless really, so I will cut the ranting and get to the point, thanking yu for your reviews and telling you that I hope you liked this chapter.
Inweofnargothrond: Because I am feeling especially nice today, you can have a cameo AND rice crackers. Which flavour would you like? I rather like BBQ, but sometimes I have strange taste. Anyway, Haldir is strange and he is pretty hard to explain, but if anything does explain him, that does. And don't worry, just because Percy is sitting forgotten at the bottom of the pool doesn't mean that his part in this story is over. Way more Percy to come yet. Mwa haa haa. Hehe, I like being evil... all right, not exactly evil, but unhinged at least. Anyway, as I have been doing a lot today, I will thank you so much for your reviews, cos they always make me smile. Grins see? Hope you liked this chapter, despite the lack of Percy the Parsnip.
Paladin Dragoon: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! Well, I am probably a little bit late by now. Sorry about the last chapter, it went all screwy and no matter how hard I tried, I simply could no get it to work properly. Glad you managed to read it cos it gave me a headache just looking at it. Glad you like the hyperness. I like hyperness too, hyperness is almost as good as the effect you get when you feed Legolas lots and lots of sugar. In that case, hyperness is an understatement. Lol. Hope you liked this chapter. Say hi to Loki and CF for me. Thankies for reviewing, just in time for MY birthday! (Even though it was actually a week ago... oh well, we can just pretend.) lol. So thankies, you rock.
Leggie: Hello there. Which evil thingy is this that we're talking about? I don't know, I have a lot of evil ideas for this fic and cant really tell them all apart as a result of my muddle brain. I NEED RP... cough cough yeah, anyway. By the time this is up the new site will probably be up and running, but as I write this, I am suffering severe RP withdrawal symptoms. As I have said to about seven other people, I am so sorry about how the last chapter went all weird. When I wrote it, it was all normal, like I would write anything else, but ff.net was being a pain in the arse and screwed it up. That day there was a lot of kicking of computers and swearing loudly at ff.net. Anyway. I am all happy now and I hope you are too. Matrix trench coat was for you so I hope it's ok. Besides, if it's not, I'm not going to be changing anything... hehe, see how lazy I am? Anyway, for the final time, DO NOT THANK ME!! I should be thanking you. Ah, I can see this will go on in a never ending cycle... anyway, thankies for reviewsies. Make me giggle like a hyperactive hobbit when I read them. So, again I managed to write a reply to your review longer than the actually review itself. I WIN!! AGAIN!!! Mwa haa haa. Alrighty, hope you didn't find this chapter to disturbing and that you enjoyed it to some extent. Righto, Cya then. Amin Mela lle. Thanks again.
Marissa03: Hello!! I have borrowed Eomer today to help me here. He is spinning around on the computer chair at the moment while I kneel on the floor and type this. We both would like to know how long it will be until I receive a lovely little chapter of Estel in my inbox. Eomer has had the pleasure of reading it and is eagerly awaiting more. Ah yes, one thing, being shoved into blenders, in terms of this fic, that isn't that harsh. Lol. It can get worse. Lol. Right, Eomer is looking a bit green in the face from spinning around so if he could talk without feeling like he is going to throw up I'm sure he will thank you for reviewing. You also get a thankyou from me as well. You rock. (
Nomad6: Hi Nellie the elf, hobbit, rider of Rohan, maiden of Gondor, whatever you feel like being today. Today I am a hobbit... lol. I still cannot thank you enough for still finding the time, or making the time, whatever, to go through this silly fanfiction and correcting all my screw ups. I know there are a lot of them, so a really cant thank you enough.
Haven't got my letter yet? Hmm, I sent it a while ago; I shall just have to write you a new one. Anyway, second term of school is kinda dodgy so far, maths teachers are evil, but you knew that already. I have Mrs Campbell again for science... she still smiles too much, rather scary.
You still have to let me know when you get your horse. Hehe, you probably already have it, and I am so out of date that I don't realise yet. Well, thankyou again, another chapter should be coming along some time in the very near future.
Lots of hugs and hobbits
Lauren
Thankyou everyone, you really made my day. Don't forget to review this chapter, I know you all will. Grins.
Ah yes, thanks again to Nellie (Nomad6) for beta-ing this chapter. All mistakes are of my doing, so sorry about that, but I'm not the world's best speller.
Righto, review please!!
Love Lamoo.
Also terribly sorry this chapter took so long. School has started again, groan, so I don't have as much free time on my hands with the horrible onset of maths homework... shudder I know I am never much good at updating regularly anyway, but please bear with me if I neglect this a little. I will try my level best not to, but if you don't hear from me for a while, you will know that I have probably been eaten by my maths textbook.
Tremendous Thankies to Nellie (nomad6) again for beta-ing this chapter. Because the elf is busy teaching Pippin to tie his shoelaces, (even though hobbits don't tend to wear shoes) Jack Sparrow and Will Turner are hers for the day.
Disclaimer: Lamoo bangs head on wall before she proceeds to explain that she owns nothing in this fanfiction, apart from some of the ideas. Ah yes, she also wishes to tell people that if they want to use elements of this story in their own stuff, that is perfectly fine with her, as long as you give her the link so she can have a read of it once its done. (
Replies to reviews at the end of this chapter as usual.
Has anyone else noticed my author notes at the beginning of this chapter seem unusually short? Hmm, never mind, maybe it's just me.
Wait, one more thing about temperatures... 40 degrees Celsius is very hot, sweaty and horrible. 30 F is about 6 C (I think it could be less)
Ok, I'll get on with it now.
Chapter 11
In the previous Chapter of TF&TEND: the adventures continue, Percy had a bit of an accident, Legolas and Aragorn discovered that Eomer can get quite irked when he doesn't get a car park, Aragorn became stuck in a new pair of pants and the ranger's car was spied for the first time in at least 25 chapters.
Legolas and Aragorn were striding briskly through the shopping centre, bags swinging wildly. The ranger had to walk very fast to keep up with the elf's long strides, but his legs were somewhat restricted by his skin-tight pants.
"Keep up Estel," Legolas called over his shoulder as he stepped onto the escalator.
Legolas looked over his shoulder to make sure that Aragorn was following but stopped in his tracks as soon as he saw that the ranger was not tagging along behind him. "Estel?" called Legolas, scanning the area. He called out Aragorn's name again before he caught sight of the ranger gawking at something shiny and black in a shop window.
The elf strode briskly over to Aragorn and found himself rolling his eyes at what the ranger was gazing at. A mannequin dressed in a large, shiny, black trench coat stood in the window. Aragorn was gazing at it with glassy eyes and Legolas could swear he saw drool dribbling out the corner of Aragorn's gawping mouth. "Aragorn?" the elf said, not sure if the ranger could hear him, being pretty sure that Aragorn was off in his own little world filled with Matrix trench coats and monopoly money. Legolas waved his hand in front of his friend's face and Aragorn snapped back to reality.
"What are you doing?" Legolas asked the ranger.
"Looking," came the simple reply. Aragorn turned his attention back on the beloved matrix trench coat in the shop window and the glassy, glazed looked appeared in his eyes again. It reminded Legolas strangely of Elrond on the verge of a temper tantrum. "Come on," said the elf. "We have to go."
"Why?" whined Aragorn, pressing his nose up to the glass.
Legolas suddenly became aware of the people sending shifty glances his way. He didn't even bother wondering why, for he was pretty sure that a grown man pressing his face up against a shop window and a blonde elf trying to persuade him patiently to follow along like a little child wouldn't be one that happened in the mall everyday. But then Legolas noticed the marks on the glass caused by people putting their noses on the glass. Many of them were too high up to have been made by little kids, and Legolas thought grimly that perhaps other grown men tended to gawk in front of the shop with the matrix coat on a fairly regular basis. However, the elf really wanted to get home so he grabbed Aragorn by the sleeve.
"Come along," he said firmly. "Or we'll be late for Haldir's dinner party," he explained slowly, as if he was talking to a foreign five year old that hadn't quite got the whole concept of the English language.
"Can I get that?" Aragorn asked, pointing to the coat in the window.
Legolas shook his head. "No Estel," he replied. "We don't have time."
"Why not!" whinged Aragorn. He saw the fleeting look of annoyance and frustration that passed over Legolas's face. "Please Legolas? Maybe it can be an early birthday present?" he suggested, using the softer, more persuasive approach to get what he wanted.
"Fine," said the elf, grabbing the ranger's arm and strutting into the store. He looked around for the sales clerk to ask if they had any of the big black coats for Aragorn to try on.
He glanced over to the counter and spied a young lady with a chestnut bob wearing a pale blue blouse and a short black mini skirt. Legolas strode over, about to speak to the clerk before she looked up and Legolas nearly had a heart attack.
"What does the nasty elf want with us preciousss?" asked the girl, and it occurred to Legolas all of a sudden that the sales girl was not a girl at all, but rather Smeagol trying a new look.
Legolas hurriedly sought to regain his composure and as soon as he got over the shock, he let his smooth, suave side come in while he politely asked Smeagol about Aragorn's beloved coat. However, he couldn't quite help not mentioning the fact that last time he saw Smeagol at work, work was at the supermarket.
"The tricksy, fat store manager saids they had to let us go," Smeagol explained, hopping up from the stool behind the counter and striding over to a rack near the change rooms. "In other words, we was fired preciouss," he exclaimed, rifting through the various sizes of black trench coat for Aragorn's size. "So we applies for the new jobs here and we gets it, oh yes we does my love."
Legolas simply nodded not sure what to say. He really wanted to know exactly why Smeagol was fired but his logical, polite side told him that he probably shouldn't ask. Then he realised that perhaps he didn't want to know.
"Get the stupid human to try these ones on," Smeagol said, handing the tall blonde elf several sizes of the same, in Legolas' opinion ghastly, coat. The elf in turn, tossed them into Aragorn's waiting arms and ushered him into the change rooms. Much to Legolas's relief, it took barley seconds for the ranger to leap out of the change room with the correct size coat.
Legolas handed Smeagol his credit card, wanting to be done with the whole trench coat business and go home. The transaction was completed in no time, and only a few minutes later, Aragorn came skipping wearing his new coat, which matched his clinging pants perfectly. Out of the store Legolas followed behind, not quite sure what to think now that he knew that he'd just spent $400 on a coat for Aragorn, who would probably get bored of it within a week.
Aragorn ran ahead to the car and waited there for a few minutes before the elf arrived. Legolas opened the door and slid into the drivers' seat. He was very tempted to just pull out of the parking space and drive away without the ranger, but his common sense told him that if he did, Lamoo would be on his tail faster than he could say his fathers full name. Mind you, that could take a while, especially with all the tricky pronunciation. The point is, that Legolas allowed Aragorn to clambour into the car BEFORE he started the engine and began driving towards home.
Meanwhile, back at the fellowship's house, the hobbits had given up on Percy, leaving the parsnip to the mercy of the pool chemicals and the thing that vacuumed up the leaves on the bottom.
Gimli was debating with himself about who could have possibly taken his yellow wool and Gandalf was in his bedroom STILL trying to decide what to wear to Haldir's dinner party. Haldir of course was going through the final stages of his makeover and Lamoo would like to assure her readers that Haldir now wishes that he had warning before the fab 5 were set loose on him.
At that precise moment, Merry and Pippin were parked in front of the TV, as usual, watching Monty Python: The Life of Brian. They had a peculiar habit of watching the endings of movies before they went back and watched the whole thing again, they were currently singing along with 'the bright side of life'.
"Always look on the bright side of death. Right before you draw your terminal breath Life's a piece of shit When you look at it Life's a laugh, deaths a joke its true You'll see its all a show Keep em laughing as you go Just remember that the last laugh is on you," sung the pair, swaying backwards and forwards to the music.
Then Pippin tried to whistle and just ended up spitting all over the TV screen, which he was sitting merely inches away from, Merry snickered and found himself being smacked over the head. Pippin giggled a bit and the other hobbit was quite surprised to see that he was over Percy the parsnip already. But then, thought Merry, Monty Python always makes everyone feel better, even Elrond during a particular time of the month.
Sam was in the kitchen, cooking, as usual. This time he was trying to follow a recipe for a weird fancy desert from a Jamie Oliver cookbook. As he cooked, he did a running commentary for anyone who might care, and even threw in a few little "Lovely Jubbleys" for effect. However, no one was listening, and no one did care, not even Frodo, for he was sitting in the study browsing the Internet. After checking each of his fifteen email accounts, he was looking for the most luxurious, most expensive hotel in Bali. Seeing as how the trip Legolas had won was all expenses paid, Frodo figured they might as well take advantage and indulge in every single thing they could get away with. After a bit of searching he found a lovely hotel on Sanur beach, actually right ON the beach with wonderful ocean views and deluxe honeymoon suites. He chose to ignore the fact that the rooms he had choses were honeymoon rooms, and only had one bed, but he didn't see why each member of the fellowship couldn't have their own room.
The hobbit grinned to himself, spun around a few times on the spinning chair before he clicked onto the msn messenger conversation that had just popped up. He made himself comfortable and found that the person on msn was Bilbo.
They discussed several things that afternoon, including Legolas's mood swings, potatoes and the collection of home movies belonging to Pippin, which currently resided at Elrond's house. Neither hobbit knew exactly what Elrond would want/or need the videos for and they were both sure that they didn't really want to find out.
Frodo heard a car pull into the drive way and said good-bye to Bilbo before he signed off MSN. He left the study and wandered out into the lounge room, just in case Legolas caught him on the Internet talking about him. Frodo told Merry and Pippin that if anyone asked, he had been in front of Monty Python the whole afternoon.
The latch on the door clicked and in sauntered Aragorn in a very happy mood. Frodo had to look twice to make sure that the black leather clad figure waltzing around the living room was actually the dark haired ranger. Legolas strode in behind, flashed a very un-interesting smile at the hobbits before he marched off to the bathroom to have a shower before Haldir's dinner party.
Just as the elf disappeared around the corner there was a crash and several swear words, some in elvish uttered by Legolas and others in some other tongue that sounded like they were being spoken by someone who had just swallowed a whole porcupine and had no throat lozenges at their disposal.
"What the !#$ do you think you were doing?!" yelled the elf, storming back into view.
Gandalf sidled around the corner behind him, red in the face, but with a blue beard. "I was walking to the kitchen to tip my paint down the sink!" he bellowed. The hobbits had all turned around and were watching the argument with interest. Aragorn ignored the arguing pair, quite used to Legolas getting pissed off at various people. The ranger pounced on the couch and quickly turned off Monty Python so he could watch cartoons.
Legolas yelled a few pieces of incomprehensible elvish at Gandalf, which none of the other fellowship members could understand. Obviously the wizard did understand parts of the very rude, very loud, very abusive sentence and reddened in the face further. The hobbits saw his hands shaking, which in turn made more blue paint slop onto his beard.
How did this happen you ask? Well, Gandalf had decided that if he wasn't allowed to wear his red cocktail dress to Haldir's party, then he would wear a blue one. The only problem was of course that he didn't own a blue silk cocktail dress. So, he did the only thing an intelligent cough cough individual would do... He painted his red dress blue.
He had just finished and had been carrying the container of blue paint into the kitchen to clean up when Legolas had strode briskly around the corner at that precise moment. The elf and the wizard bashed into each other, sending blue paint all down the front of Legolas's shirt, which was blue already, and Gandalf's beard.
Legolas didn't even bother to wait for a reply after he screamed a bit more at Gandalf until he himself was red in the face and could hear the blood pounding in his ears. He stormed off to his bedroom and as he slammed the door, several tacky ornaments toppled forwards off the shelves in the living room and smashed on the floor.
Gandalf muttered curses under his breath and stomped off to the kitchen to try and work out how to get the blue paint out of his beard.
"I think Lamoo has an unhealthy obsession with putting various coloured things through people's hair and beards," commented Merry knowledgeably. Frodo and Pip nodded in agreement before they turned back to the TV, only to find that Aragorn had turned off their precious Monty Python and was now glued to the powerpuff girls.
Two hours later, the powerpuff girls marathon ended and by them, the whole fellowship, including Legolas and Gandalf, were all crowded around the TV. In fact, the antics of the cartoon characters had somewhat of a hypnotizing effect on the group.
The last episode ended and Aragorn leapt to his feet, glancing to the clock on the wall.
"What time is Haldir's party thing?" he asked anyone who might answer.
The hobbits shrugged and Aragorn wondered why he bothered asking when he knew the hobbits never knew anything useful. Gandalf also shrugged, as did Legolas. Both elf and wizard were perfectly chummy now. Legolas taking advantage of the blue paint all over him and giving himself bright blue streaks in his hair before the paint on his shirt dried. Gandalf meanwhile, still had his bright blue beard, but had his arm slung over the elf's in a particularly friendly manner.
Gimli spoke up just as Aragorn was about to give up hope that anyone knew the answer to his question. It didn't occur to him that to find out what time Haldir's dinner party started, all he had to do was to glance at the invitation which was stuck to the fridge with a particularly ghastly magnet in the shape of pair of flippers.
"Starts in about three minutes," said the dwarf matter-of-factly.
Aragorn saw Legolas's eyes bulge when he found out that he did not have a whole two hours to get dressed. The hobbits also looked surprised, wondering how on earth they could have stayed still for two hours without noticing. Suddenly Sam leapt up in alarm and sprinted to the kitchen.
A minute later, smoke came gushing out of the doorway and the rest of the fellowship saw Sam come trudging out holding his burnt desert mournfully.
"Don't worry Sam," said Legolas. "There's some ice cream in the freezer that I bought to take to Haldir's."
Merry and Pippin exchanged worried looks, only just figuring out then what the ice cream had been for before they had eaten it. They did not want to think about how Legolas would react when he found out that the ice cream that he thought was in the freezer wasn't actually there at all. Pippin made a quick decision to tell Legolas what happened to the ice cream, because he knew that if the elf found out on his own there would be even more strife.
However, Pippin came up with a clever lie that would be believable but that would also prevent Legolas from beating the snot out of anyone. "Legolas?"
The elf turned to the hobbit and raised his eyebrows in question. "Hmm?"
Pippin nibbled on his fingernail, trying to find the best way the phrase his fib. He took a deep breath and began. "Well, I saw Jack Sparrow and Will Turner sitting on the deck of their ship eating ice cream."
"So?"
"I checked in the freezer a few hours ago for some those frozen slices of pizza from three months ago, and I didn't see any ice cream in there."
Legolas laughed. "Oh, I see, its been eaten," he said, remarkably good spirited about it all. "The pirates must have eaten it. I suspected you hobbits would actually, which is why I bought a spare tub."
Pippin sighed with relief but saw Frodo and Sam tense beside him. He didn't need to ask to know that they had eaten Legolas's spare tub of butterscotch swirl ice cream. The elf also saw the reactions of the hobbits and sighed audibly. "And it's been eaten too hasn't it?"
The hobbits all nodded guiltily.
"I hope Haldir has plenty of desert," mused Aragorn. Suddenly he noticed the clock and saw that they all had under twenty five seconds to be ready, dressed and over at Haldir's. "Will he mind if we're late?"
Legolas shrugged. "He'd better not," he replied before in a flurry of strawberry blonde hair with blue streaks, which had previously been red, the elf was gone.
The rest of the fellowship all went their separate ways and in a little under ten minutes they were all gathered in the living room, clean, dressed and pressed.
Legolas hadn't bothered to make Gandalf change from the blue dress, which was still dripping with sapphire paint. The elf himself was dressed smartly in dark trousers and the purple paisley shirt he had bought that day. Over the top he wore a smart black suit jacket and looked very snappy indeed. Aragorn had refused point blank to wear anything other than his new matrix trench coat. And the good news now was that he and Legolas didn't have to bother trying to get him out of the tight pants. Of course the ranger could have just worn some other trousers over the top, but he thought that his new, butt hugging, leg hugging, everything else hugging pants matched his coat. He had even managed to find a pair of sunnies in his bedroom, which was a miracle in itself that he had found ANYTHING in the mess he called 'creative clutter'.
The hobbits all looked radically different. Merry wore a suit of bright green velvet with a spotty yellow tie and shoes so shiny he could see his face in them. He had dragged a brush through his hair, quite a difficult task. But he had accidentally gotten the brush stuck, so now he had a brush stuck in his hair, hanging down at the back of his head.
Pippin meanwhile was garbed in a ghastly pink Hawaiian shirt and purple pants. He wasn't wearing shoes, as usual, for the hobbit held a firm belief that no matter what the circumstance, hobbit feet should be free. Sam wore a red suit with a white lacy cravat, Austin Powers style. It hurt Frodo's eyes to look at the hobbit in red. He himself was wearing the most boring, most conservative suit he could find. A brown tie matched the brown suit, which matched his brown shoes and brown shirt.
Gimli liked the colour brown, but had refused to wear it after Frodo announced that brown was his new favourite colour. Gimli wore a tuxedo, a little formal perhaps, but at least he was making an effort.
So, all dressed, pressed and pretty the fellowship marched out the door, across the lawn, was amazed by the number of cars parked in Haldir's drive way and along the street, before they, four hobbits, human, elf, dwarf and wizard, stood at Haldir's front door and rang the doorbell...
TBC
AN/ mwa haa. I have only just noticed that I often end my chapter with something to do with a doorbell. I am weird.
Anyway, sorry for the extreme un-funniness of this chapter. I hope you liked it anyway, even though it was a bit on the weird side.
Ok, now for the best bit... reviews. Grins I love them guys, keep em coming. ( It's you guys who keep this story afloat. On the other hand, they also make the hobbits and Legolas very happy. And in the moods Legolas has been in lately, keeping him happy is a very good thing.
Yoshi: Hey there. I don't recall hearing from you before, but that might have been one of those times where ff.net was all weird and deleted all my reviews... or maybe it was just me being an idiot and not remembering. I am very pleased indeedy that you liked the first TF&TEND and what has happened so far in this one. Thankyou so, so much for your review, it made my day. =) I hope you liked this chapter as much as the last ones. Oh yeah, and only one more chapter to wait until everyone finds out exactly what the fab 5 did to poor Hal-dear. Oh yes, and Legolas can take me for a massage any day. Lol. Righto, again, thanks for your review, you rock!
Banx: arg, I know! The last chapter was so screweyed up. And the problem is, I DON'T KNOW WHY!!! Which makes things very frustrating. However, I will try and re-upload it so that it is actually a little more than just a jumble of mixed up words. Sorry about that. But I am, on the other hand, VERY pleased t hear you refer to chapter 9 as 'freaking awesome'. That made me giggle and go all smiley and happy. Which is a good thing by the way... lol. And another thing, you reviews are NEVER pointless. And Long is good, the longer the better. Lol. Oh yeah, before I forget, before I write the next chapter I need to know if you don't mind battling it out with my sister for Haldir again. In other words, a cameo at Haldir's dinner party? Please say yes, but its ok if you don't, I might be able to bribe Sam into kissing Haldir.... evil laugh anyway, thankies so much for reviewing, made me veddy veddy happy it did, reading your review. But then again, reading yours always do.
Kawaii elf girl: ello ello. How's life? I am really sorry about the 'giant chapter', all the words got mushed up, and even after I re-loaded the chapter about five times I could do nothing about it but get myself all flustered and annoyed. So sorry again. Now it's my turn, thankyou for de reviewsies. Your travel-agent cameo will be coming up pretty soon...
Anelith Wood: what? Dirty mind? I don't have a dirty mind... not very often anyway. Cough cough heh. But personally I didn't think Frodo topless in ROTK was anything that special. Ok, ok, I admit to being busy thinking about Legolas at the time, but he was just a pale little skinny guy who is in need of a haircut. Sorry about that. You are however, still very welcome to smooch, attack, hug, so whatever to Frodo if you manage to catch him. Lol. Leggsie and the twins will only be too happy to oblige to your every command however, well, that's if I can convince them that anyone who's a fan and female is not evil. (Silly idiots still think I want to eat them... hang on a second... I do... ok, forget that thought). Anyway, in the case of Aragorn's tight pants, I think if the butter doesn't work to get them off then someone might have to do some vveeeeerrryyyyy careful cutting... ah yes, teachers... we have that thing in out library too. You know, where the teachers watch everything you're doing. Freaky. I wont tell the whole story, but I was doing something once and got kicked out of the library cos they thought I was doing something that I wasn't. I don't like librarians... shudder alrighty, I will get to the point now. Thanks veddy veddy much for de review, made me happy happy it did. And when I'm happy happy, I tend to update this fanfiction quicker. Lol.
Aelimir: Hope that there were not too many sick jokes in this chapter, but I have to admit that I am quite prone to them. Especially the very lame ones. Ah yes, you are very welcome to post a story similar to this. Take all the cat-food posters, rifles, light bulbs and pool toys you need. You're also very welcome to use anything else you find amusing. I am actually really flattered that you think anything in this story is good enough for you to use in your own. One thing though, you HAVE to give me the URL once it's written cos now I'm dying to see how it turns out. Hopefully your cameo should be in the next chapter, cos that's the dinner party chapter, and be prepared for some extreme Sam strangling. Lol. Don't blame you really; Sam is a bit odd, although he was better in ROTK than the other two movies. And Boromir, how on earth could I forget him? And now that the fellowship are going on vacation, they need to make sure they all look good in their swimming costumes. Grins Boromir...yay. This will be good, I love your ideas, they totally rock. And another thing, I strongly caution you NOT to try and get out of a pair of pants using butter for I have the sneaking suspicion that it probably wouldn't work too well. Perhaps some careful cutting may well be the answer. Sorry that there were also no pirated in this chapter. They will be in the next though, cos I already have that one all planned out. Evil laugh. Anyway, thankies so much for the very long and wonderfully wonderful review. You rock!
ChicagoGoth: sorry, I forgot to explain how hot 40 degrees Celsius is. Two words for it really. VERY HOT. In fact, just like it was at school today. All the classrooms and the bus on the way home all felt like saunas. Horrible. Good luck in your finals, although by the time I post this chapter up you probably will have finished. And the Aragorn pants scenario... that just struck me as a very Aragorn-ish thing to do. Wait, that is more like just something I would do... yeah. Right then, I always manage to write really long replies to reviews and all I ever do is rant and rant and rant. Quite pointless really, so I will cut the ranting and get to the point, thanking yu for your reviews and telling you that I hope you liked this chapter.
Inweofnargothrond: Because I am feeling especially nice today, you can have a cameo AND rice crackers. Which flavour would you like? I rather like BBQ, but sometimes I have strange taste. Anyway, Haldir is strange and he is pretty hard to explain, but if anything does explain him, that does. And don't worry, just because Percy is sitting forgotten at the bottom of the pool doesn't mean that his part in this story is over. Way more Percy to come yet. Mwa haa haa. Hehe, I like being evil... all right, not exactly evil, but unhinged at least. Anyway, as I have been doing a lot today, I will thank you so much for your reviews, cos they always make me smile. Grins see? Hope you liked this chapter, despite the lack of Percy the Parsnip.
Paladin Dragoon: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! Well, I am probably a little bit late by now. Sorry about the last chapter, it went all screwy and no matter how hard I tried, I simply could no get it to work properly. Glad you managed to read it cos it gave me a headache just looking at it. Glad you like the hyperness. I like hyperness too, hyperness is almost as good as the effect you get when you feed Legolas lots and lots of sugar. In that case, hyperness is an understatement. Lol. Hope you liked this chapter. Say hi to Loki and CF for me. Thankies for reviewing, just in time for MY birthday! (Even though it was actually a week ago... oh well, we can just pretend.) lol. So thankies, you rock.
Leggie: Hello there. Which evil thingy is this that we're talking about? I don't know, I have a lot of evil ideas for this fic and cant really tell them all apart as a result of my muddle brain. I NEED RP... cough cough yeah, anyway. By the time this is up the new site will probably be up and running, but as I write this, I am suffering severe RP withdrawal symptoms. As I have said to about seven other people, I am so sorry about how the last chapter went all weird. When I wrote it, it was all normal, like I would write anything else, but ff.net was being a pain in the arse and screwed it up. That day there was a lot of kicking of computers and swearing loudly at ff.net. Anyway. I am all happy now and I hope you are too. Matrix trench coat was for you so I hope it's ok. Besides, if it's not, I'm not going to be changing anything... hehe, see how lazy I am? Anyway, for the final time, DO NOT THANK ME!! I should be thanking you. Ah, I can see this will go on in a never ending cycle... anyway, thankies for reviewsies. Make me giggle like a hyperactive hobbit when I read them. So, again I managed to write a reply to your review longer than the actually review itself. I WIN!! AGAIN!!! Mwa haa haa. Alrighty, hope you didn't find this chapter to disturbing and that you enjoyed it to some extent. Righto, Cya then. Amin Mela lle. Thanks again.
Marissa03: Hello!! I have borrowed Eomer today to help me here. He is spinning around on the computer chair at the moment while I kneel on the floor and type this. We both would like to know how long it will be until I receive a lovely little chapter of Estel in my inbox. Eomer has had the pleasure of reading it and is eagerly awaiting more. Ah yes, one thing, being shoved into blenders, in terms of this fic, that isn't that harsh. Lol. It can get worse. Lol. Right, Eomer is looking a bit green in the face from spinning around so if he could talk without feeling like he is going to throw up I'm sure he will thank you for reviewing. You also get a thankyou from me as well. You rock. (
Nomad6: Hi Nellie the elf, hobbit, rider of Rohan, maiden of Gondor, whatever you feel like being today. Today I am a hobbit... lol. I still cannot thank you enough for still finding the time, or making the time, whatever, to go through this silly fanfiction and correcting all my screw ups. I know there are a lot of them, so a really cant thank you enough.
Haven't got my letter yet? Hmm, I sent it a while ago; I shall just have to write you a new one. Anyway, second term of school is kinda dodgy so far, maths teachers are evil, but you knew that already. I have Mrs Campbell again for science... she still smiles too much, rather scary.
You still have to let me know when you get your horse. Hehe, you probably already have it, and I am so out of date that I don't realise yet. Well, thankyou again, another chapter should be coming along some time in the very near future.
Lots of hugs and hobbits
Lauren
Thankyou everyone, you really made my day. Don't forget to review this chapter, I know you all will. Grins.
Ah yes, thanks again to Nellie (Nomad6) for beta-ing this chapter. All mistakes are of my doing, so sorry about that, but I'm not the world's best speller.
Righto, review please!!
Love Lamoo.
