Alexis stood in front of Carth's door, trying to remember the code that would grant her access to his apartment. She'd only used it once and there were several digits to it. She could hack it, of course, like she had done before, but that would take time. Perhaps she could open the lock with the Force…
She contemplated knocking, but she ruled that out almost immediately. It would be far better to wait for him to leave for work or to head back over to the Ebon Hawk to sleep for the day. He might be awake, however, so maybe knocking wouldn't be such a bad idea.
Finally, she remembered the code. It was the numeric equivalent of Dustil's birth date. She entered it rapidly and the door slid open. She wasn't prepared for the sight that greeted her.
Carth was sitting on the edge of his couch, apparently startled awake by the sound of the opening door. Seré was curled against his chest. Her eyes popped open only seconds after his did and they both simply stared.
Alexis couldn't stop staring either. What was going on? Why were Seré and Carth on the couch together this early in the morning? Well, they were both fully clothed, if that made any difference, Alexis noted, surveying the scene rapidly. She felt a slight frown crease her face and made an effort to straighten her features.
There is no emotion, there is peace.
Alexis closed her eyes and quickly centered herself. There was obviously a logical explanation, even if it was, in fact, the explanation that was obvious. That didn't matter. Alexis calmly informed herself that she had no real claim on Carth.
Finally, with an effort borne of pure willpower, Alexis shut the door behind them and forced a friendly smile. "Good morning all."
"How did you- I didn't know you were back." Carth finally said lamely, sitting up and pushing Seré off of his chest in the process.
"I got in very late last night," Alexis replied. She was still utterly emotionless. Her ability to control her own mind often amazed even her.
"What are you wearing?" He asked suddenly.
"Ah. This. Well, I'm supposed to look like a bounty hunter. It's a rather nice disguise when you're visiting a cantina in the early morning. Sort of goes with the pazaak and the juma juice."
"You were in a cantina all night? Didn't it ever occur to you that someone might recognize you?" Carth sounded angry.
Alexis shrugged idly. "Well, not really. It's a fairly good disguise. I don't look much like a Jedi or a Sith, you see. I look like a bounty hunter." Her responses would have seemed sarcastic if her tone hadn't been so flat. Nothing could penetrate her shell.
"Revan, are you drunk?" Seré asked. She was still leaning on Carth, even though they were both sitting up. Alexis didn't even notice.
Alexis was startled. Drunk? Her? She almost lost control, she was so surprised, but her calm dropped quickly back into its place. "No. I'm not drunk. I've never actually had any alcohol so I really wouldn't know what being drunk was like."
"What are you doing back?" Carth asked. He was till wearing his red and gold Republic uniform.
"Do you mind if I use your shower? I suppose I could go and use the one on the Ebon Hawk but I'd rather have a real shower. The refresher on that ship is pitiful, really," Alexis said, avoiding the subject. She just wanted to bathe and meditate. This conversation was taxing her energy.
It was Carth's turn to look startled. "Don't you want to know… I mean, isn't this a bit-"
"No. I'd just like a shower," Alexis replied when he trailed off.
Seré was looking back and forth between them with a glowing expression on her face. She appeared extremely pleased with herself for some reason.
Carth didn't say anything so Alexis narrowed her eyes and lifted her eyebrows slightly. "Well? May I use your shower?"
"Of course. Go ahead." Carth said weakly.
Alexis lowered her head. "Thank you." She turned on her heel and stalked off, removing weapons and holsters as she went."
Carth watched Revan leaving. She wasn't even curious as to why Seré was in the apartment? Did she not care? Had the "intensive retraining" at the academy really severed all of her emotions that way? Where was the girl he knew?
Carth stood up, shoving Seré off of him. Why hadn't he even been given the chance to explain? Should he have forced her to hear him out? No. That probably would have made things much worse.
Carth turned and glared at Seré, whose face bore the ghost of a smile. If he didn't know it were impossible, he'd say that the girl had planned the entire incident.
The night before, after Carth had arrived back at his apartment, Seré had called him, sobbing into the comlink. She kept repeating that someone had tried to break into her apartment just after Carth had left and she was frightened. Could he please come over and sit with her?
When he arrived back at her apartment, Carth saw no signs of tampering on her door. She didn't look scared at all. In fact, she'd looked rather smug. She told Carth immediately that she was nervous staying in her apartment. Could they head over to his? She'd feel much safer there.
Carth, feeling dubious about the whole thing, had reluctantly agreed. What would it hurt to let her sleep in his bed for the night? He had a perfectly good couch. He could have a tech come and take a look at her locks in the morning and everything would be fine.
Back at his apartment, however, his plan had backfired. He'd sent her off to his room to get some sleep and he'd settled down onto the couch to do some work. He had been having a hard time sleeping lately and having Seré in his apartment hadn't made things any easier.
She'd had other plans. It hadn't been ten minutes when she ran from his room, sobbing hysterically, and threw herself onto his chest. He'd held her while she cried, not knowing what else to do, and tried his best to comfort her. Eventually, she'd settled down, but she had refused point blank to go back to his bed to try to get some sleep. So she had remained, huddled against Carth's chest, until she had gone to sleep. It had taken Carth much longer, but eventually he had drifted off as well.
He hadn't awoken until Revan arrived. He certainly hadn't expected her back so soon. Their last communication hadn't even hinted that she was getting ready to return. He especially hadn't expected her back when the sun had just risen.
And why had Revan been in a cantina the night before dressed as a bounty hunter? Had she gone alone, or had she gone with friends? She seemed to have been spending an extraordinary amount of time with that scoundrel Atton Rand lately. Perhaps he had taken her into the bar. But that didn't seem quite right… Atton and Revan seemed close; but- then again, maybe they had gone as friends. Nothing fit together the way it should.
Carth sighed and looked over at Seré once again. "Can I take you back to your apartment so you can get ready for work?"
"I don't want to be alone," Seré whispered in a small voice.
Carth frowned. "I'll find a TSF officer to stand outside of your door. I have to get ready for work, too. The officer can bring you into the office whenever you're ready. In fact, I think I'll call on officer to escort you back to your apartment. There are things I need to do here." Carth started to head towards his bedroom to call for an officer on the com.
"Oh, can't you take me back? I'd feel so much better," She practically cooed. Carth hadn't ever realized how truly annoying his secretary was. Could he fire her on the grounds that she grated at his nerves?
"No can do. I'll call on officer. I'm sure that a TSF agent will be able to keep you as safe as I would. More so, in fact. I'm getting old," Carth said absently, continuing to walk away. He thought he heard Seré huff in frustration, but it might have only been his imagination.
Alexis felt the warm water sluice over her cold body and shut her eyes, enjoying the sensation. It was funny how such warmth could penetrate the spirit as well as the body. Everything this morning had been so tense. The shower was a good way for her to get things back into perspective.
Nothing too bad had happened, really. Kalen and Mira were drunk. That wasn't her problem. She used the Force to manipulate the mind of another… that was her problem, but it wasn't particularly dangerous, at least not in this case.
What else?
Kalen and Atton were still having difficulties. That was something she could help with. They just needed a push in the right direction. All that was left was Carth. And Seré. Together.
Alexis pulled her mind away from that thought quickly. Jealousy was an emotion that led to the dark side. That was something she could not afford. Carth was angry with her. That she could deal with. He just needed to know how slight the risk that she would be recognized had truly been.
Alexis scrubbed at her hair idly with her hands. The soapy lather ran down into her face and she shut her eyes quickly. She could still easily picture Carth and Seré on the sofa…
Alexis reined her mind in once again. She forced open her eyes to dispel the image and soap ran into her eyes. She immediately erupted into a long trail of curses as the soap burned her eyes.
This was not going to be her day.
Alexis emerged from the shower shortly thereafter, dressed in some of the clothing Carth had purchased for her a couple of weeks before. It fit her a bit better now. She no longer looked as if she were a child dressed in her mother's clothing. She almost looked healthy. She was toweling her damp hair when she ran into Carth in the hall. "Excuse me," she said in a friendly tone, stepping out of the way.
Carth reached out, as if to grab her wrist, but dropped his hand slowly. "We need to talk."
"You should probably go get a shower. Don't you have to be at work soon?" Alexis asked. She hated how formal she sounded, but there was nothing she could do about it if she wanted to remain in control.
"Revan," he began, but he stopped and looked at her helplessly, apparently at a loss for words.
"We can talk some other time. I'll be ready to get out of your apartment whenever you're ready to leave, I promise."
"You don't have to do that. Stay here. We'll talk when I get off of work," Carth said, a pleading look in his eyes.
Alexis felt her defenses melting. Those brown eyes of his would probably be her downfall. "Fine. Thanks for letting me stay, then."
"Revan…" He started one more time. Alexis shook her head and started to walk away. "Wait."
Alexis turned back slowly. Oh no, what was he going to do? "Nothing happened," he whispered before he disappeared into the bathroom to take his shower.
Alexis had been careful to avoid Carth when he was leaving for work. She wasn't ready to talk to him again. Even if nothing had happened. Even if she wasn't jealous. Or scared. At all.
Alexis settled down in the middle of Carth's living room floor and collapsed into a seated position. She crossed her legs, closed her eyes, and tried to empty her mind… but to no avail. She couldn't get Carth out of her head: his voice, his smile, his eyes, that stupid orange jacket…
Why was nothing working? Alexis heard a soft noise and stood up quickly. What was that? She eased her way into the kitchen, her back to the wall, grasping her lightsaber.
The noise was soft and scratchy, like a tree branch brushing against a window. She stiffened and started to switch on her lightsaber. Wait- assassins didn't make any sound. She took a few more steps, straining to hear exactly where the sound was coming from.
The gizka stepped out of the doorway leading to the hall, his nails raking against the ground as he moved. Alexis was unable to stop herself from igniting her lightsaber, which frightened the silly beast to no end. With a look of comical fear, the little creature slammed backwards into the wall and shut his eyes. He seemed to believe that is he couldn't see her, she couldn't see him.
Alexis lowered her lightsaber and switched it back off with a frustrated sigh. She was cracking up. She couldn't even sense the difference between gizka and assassins. She'd finally gone mad.
Alexis slid down the wall and onto the floor, pulling her knees up to her chest. That gizka was going to give her a heart attack. That was, of course, is she didn't give it one first.
The gizka must have forgotten how scary she had been a moment before because he ambled over to her and put his head on her calf. She smiled faintly at him. "It's not your fault I've lost my mind, is it? You just wanted someone to pet you."
The gizka was encouraged by her words and leapt up onto her raised knees. She lowered her knees slowly and scooped the gizka up and held him against her chest. He made a sort of purring noise and shut his eyes while Alexis scratched him.
"Why did Carth keep you? You aren't the best pet. You're kind of frightening. You've almost made a former Sith Lord pee her pants twice. But she's off her rocker, so I suppose that's not really saying anything. Force, I'm even talking to a gizka," Alexis groaned.
The little gizka blinked at her. "Why is it that I never see you until I least expect it?" Alexis asked him. "All of these questions are rhetorical, of course. If you answer, I'll know I'm a nutcase."
Alexis heard the com go off in Carth's bedroom. She lowered the gizka to the floor and headed towards the sound, wondering whether or not it was someone she could answer.
When she arrived, Dustil Onasi's voice was echoing loudly through the empty room. "Dad! I know you haven't left for work yet. Why aren't you picking up?" He sounded a lot like Carth.
Alexis thought for a moment. Should she answer? It might be important and Dustil was certainly entitled to know that she had returned. Carth might not want him to know, however. It wasn't really her place.
"Dad?"
Oh well. Might as well go for it. "Dustil?" Alexis said, switching on the com to answer the call. The boy's face immediately sprung up on the screen.
"Revan?" Dustil said incredulously. "What are you doing there?"
"I guess I've come back to do what I should have in the first place," Alexis began hesitantly.
Dustil was frowning at her. "What, like marry my dad?"
Alexis was shocked. Did Dustil want her to marry Carth? "No… to help rebuild the Republic."
Dustil made a disgusted sound in the back of his throat. "Haven't you tortured him enough?"
"Torture? I-"
"He's been pining after you for four years. You finally come back and you say all you returned for was the Republic?" Dustil even got angry like Carth did.
"Dustil, I really don't know why I came back. I hadn't even been planning on helping the Republic. At least not originally. I didn't have any kind of plan, I just… showed up," Alexis trailed off. Why had she returned from the Unknown Regions? The sad truth was, even she didn't know.
"I-" Dustil began, but he didn't finish. "All right. I'm sorry I attacked you. I just- He's been in pain for so long, Revan. He's like a ghost without you. I've been watching him for the last four years. I know."
Alexis was speechless. What could she say to that? It wasn't as if she were purposely hurting Carth. She loved him! She didn't want to see him in pain any more than Dustil did.
"Just- forget it." Dustil said, shaking his head. "I called to tell Dad that I was coming to visit in about a week. Could you let him know for me? I hate to bother him if he's already left for work."
"I'll tell him." She started to reach up to turn off the com.
"Hey Revan?"
"Yeah?"
"Will you be there when I get back?"
"I'll be here. I promise."
"Good. I intend to make you my stepmother, even if you are only seven years older than me." He turned off the com before she could respond.
Carth sat in his office again, still trying to make sense on the report from the Ithorians. It was too bad that things with Revan were a bit rocky. She could have easily made sense of this.
He was angry with her, to be sure, but he wasn't sure how much of that anger he should have directed back at himself. Revan wasn't really at fault. Did he really have any right to be mad at her for going out for one night? She really hadn't looked like herself at all. It had been a very good disguise.
Revan was absolutely stunning. Her features were exquisite: high cheekbones, a delicate nose, smooth, pale skin, and a lovely bow-shaped mouth. Revan had always been the very definition of beauty. And those eyes: her emerald eyes were captivating. He could stare into them for days…
Ah, there was the heart of the matter. Carth was angry with himself for seeing her dressed that way and immediately having the urge to drag her off to his bed. Revan certainly didn't need a horny old man added to her list of problems. In fact, she really didn't need him at all. She never had.
Carth had always hoped that one day, Revan might come to rely upon him, to need him as much as he needed her. But she didn't. She was too independent. This morning was proof of that. If he had discovered her asleep in the arms of another man, he probably would have exploded. She had calmly asked to use his shower. The shower! As if that had mattered!
Carth had been thinking of taking her in his arms and… And all she did was calmly ask to use his shower, ignoring the woman practically lying in his lap! She hadn't so much as asked why Seré was there. She was the most frustrating woman he had ever met. Could she have at least had the decency to be a little jealous?
Jealousy leads to the dark side, an annoying little voice whispered in the back of his head. Carth sighed and felt the anger drain out of him. He didn't really want her to be jealous… Well, not really. He'd just wanted some sort of reaction, some sign that she might have cared. He hadn't gotten it. All he'd gotten had been a cold shower.
