Dinner was a rowdy affair. People ended up in other's laps and stole food from one another's plates. A few gooey globs were thrown and Mira ended up covered in Canderous's drink. After they ate, they all helped clean up before retiring to the living room.

Afterwards, they stood in the living room and sparred and played pazaak. Mira danced on a table, fully clothed of course, and Kalen ran through the living room, randomly hugging and kissing people, male and female alike. The most visibly affected by this was Atton, who hung between bemusement by the kiss she'd given him and jealousy when she touched anyone else.

After all was said and done, it was well into the night. Carth looked exhausted, so Alexis shuffled him off to bed. He probably wouldn't stay there for long, but she needed to talk to Kalen. They met in the living room, both of them with mussed clothes and hair and brilliant smiles.

"You wanted to talk to me?" Kalen asked, dropping onto the couch.

"Yeah. I've got a couple of things I wanted to talk about."

"Okay," Kalen said with a shrug.

"So, the first thing I wanted to say was, did you see the way Mira was looking at Dustil? Do you think I should be worried about him?"

"Are you his mother?"

"Well- no…"

"Then let the boy be. Mira won't hurt him. I think she actually likes this one. He might not just be another conquest."

Alexis relaxed a little. "You're right. It's his choice."

"So what next?"

"How are things with you and Atton? Other than the obvious, of course."

"He's a really great guy. I just need to get myself under control. He's beating me at this game hands down. He's got my head spinning. The thing with the shower? That's utter brilliance, my friend. And he left. He didn't try to take advantage of the situation. I could barely contain myself and he just walked out."

Alexis smiled. "I think that you can get him off balance, too. It shouldn't be too hard."

"What about you?"

Alexis shook her head. "Not yet. I still don't know. I'm so indecisive. One minute I've decided I'm going to throw myself at him and the next I realize that I should leave before I hurt him any more. For the moment, I'm not going to do anything."

Kalen nodded. "I'll agree with the indecisive factor. But you and I both know what you should do."

"It seems so selfish," Alexis said uncertainly.

"But is it?"

"You and your barbed questions."

"They are only barbed because you let them be."

Alexis sighed and ran a weary hand through her hair. "Tell me this. Where do you see you and Atton going? Marriage? A family? Children? Does Atton want those things? Do you?"

"I do. As for Atton, I don't know. I think that he does, though. Maybe it's just wishful thinking on my part? Maybe, when we're finally comfortable with one another, I'll ask him. It's something you and Carth could try."

Alexis sighed. "I want to, but I'm afraid."

"He isn't going to hurt you, Lexi. The man loves you. Give him a chance. I'm getting very tired of you standing back and letting life pass you by. Yes, you made a mistake. Yes, it hurt a lot of people. But you're not that girl anymore. I think that you're hurting Carth far more than you ever hurt anyone when you were Darth Revan. Do you know why? Because Carth knows you. He knows that you're not like that. And when you're like that to him, it cuts him to the quick. Can't you see it, Lexi? Where are you? You've got your emotions locked up so tight that you might fall because of your indifference. Let go!"

Alexis bit her lip and stared at Kalen helplessly. Why did she have to be so… right? Defeated, Alexis let her shoulders slump. "Kalen… every time I feel something, I feel as if I'm betraying the Jedi. I have tried to convince myself that I can't live that way but it's so hard to break a habit that has been mine since the day I was born. Even as a Sith, I was indifferent to any real emotion. Surface emotions, yes, but anything deeper than that couldn't touch me. And now they're… swarming me like mynocks. Hurt, jealousy, fear, love, joy, sadness… Look at me! I'm an emotional cripple. And it's my own fault."

Kalen took Alexis by the hand, gently, but firmly. "You can't do it by yourself. You have to let go enough to let others in before we can help you. We want to help you, Lexi. Give us the chance."

Alexis nodded. "I want to. I want to so bad that it hurts."

Kalen squeezed her hand and Alexis stared at their intertwined fingers, hoping that she could do what Kalen asked. They sat there together for a long time. Finally, Kalen broke the silence. "I don't think that you kept me here to talk about how you were feeling. I don't believe it for a minute. So, what am I here for?"

Alexis smiled faintly. "Two more things. Do you think that Dustil would make a decent Jedi?"

"I think that he would be a very good Jedi. Carth would have too for that matter. Dustil's a powerful young man. His heart is good and his mind is sharp. I think that we can train him. Hasn't he already had basic Force training?"

Alexis nodded. "He was in training to be a Sith on Korriban."

"So he'll just need a little retraining. I'll bet he's pretty sharp with a lightsaber. Maybe you should give him to me," Kalen said hopefully.

"I have to get him to agree to become a Jedi first. He's been going to school to be an engineer, I believe. What if he sees the Jedi as a waste of his time?"

"With Carth as his father? I doubt that."

Alexis lowered her eyes. That was certainly true. "Alright. One last question. What are you going to do about Mical?"

"What do you mean?"

Alexis looked into Kalen's eyes. She truly didn't know how Mical felt about her. Alexis knew that she'd promised the Disciple that she wouldn't tell Kalen, so how could she hint at it without betraying him? "I think that he seems very upset. Closed off. I wasn't aware that he was such a recluse."

"He's not. And you're right. I've been too preoccupied with Atton lately to even consider Mical. He doesn't seem well, does he? Perhaps I will speak with him." Kalen looked thoughtful.

"That's all I ask. I know that he is a quiet man by nature, but I worry about him sometimes." Alexis was relieved. Kalen would look into it and eventually come to understand. Afterwards, they could speak freely about it.

Kalen turned her eyes until Alexis had to look straight into them. Not many people did this on purpose and Alexis was a bit startled. "Lexi, I want to ask you something," her gaze was piercing. "How do you feel right now?" She gave Alexis a wry smile. She was kidding, and yet she wasn't.

"Confused. And afraid."

Kalen nodded. "I think that that will do, for now. So, are you through interrogating me? May I return to my ship to torment my man?"

Alexis smiled. "Yes. Pull a rug out from beneath him for me too, will you?"

Kalen smiled. "You got it."

Alexis slid into the bedroom where Carth and Dustil were, her shoes in her hand. They glanced up at her, but neither spoke. It was clear that they had been speaking, before she arrived, and Alexis felt a twinge of guilt. She should have knocked before entering so that they could have had the opportunity to tell her to go away.

"Hi guys," Alexis said weakly, making her way to Carth's closet to deposit her boots and find something to wear to bed. When she emerged with one of Carth's t-shirts clamped tightly in her fist, Dustil made a strangling noise and looked over at Carth.

"She wears your shirts? And sleeps in your bed? And you two…" he trailed off, remembering himself. Ah, to be young and impulsive again, Alexis thought. Without the ability to control one's tongue.

"I can go into the living room if you two are still busy," Alexis said. "I still have to brush my teeth anyway. I'll go ahead and go. You two have a lot of catching up to do, I'm sure."

"Please, stay. Dad says you have something you want to talk to me about," Dustil said quickly.

Alexis shook her head. "It's late. Anything I have to say can wait until morning. It is better that the pair of you talk for a while. Besides, Carth needs to go to bed soon. If he does not rest, his cold won't go away."

"Stay," Carth said softly, and Alexis wavered until his gentle command. She wanted to stay, quite badly in fact, but it wasn't her place. Maybe Carth was trying to tell her that he wanted it to be.

"I'll go ahead and change clothes and brush my teeth. I'll be back," she said reassuringly, walking out of the room.

Dustil turned to his father incredulously as soon as Alexis left. Carth waited patiently as his son fought for words. "That… that gorgeous creature is sleeping in your bed in nothing but a t-shirt? And you haven't… She isn't…" Dustil was in shock.

Carth watched his son closely. The boy didn't really understand. Sometimes didn't think that he himself understood the problem. "No," Carth replied simply.

"Are you…" Dustil began. He flushed and Carth began to laugh.

"I'm not that old, Dustil."

"I didn't quite mean it that way. It just seems like you'd have to be crazy," Dustil finally said. He was back in control.

Carth studied his son once more. Carth knew that he'd been crazy ever since he met the woman. Now was no exception. "I think I might be crazy. So what? I've been waiting this long. What's a few more months? At least she's finally back here."

"You never loved Mother this much," Dustil said softly. Carth glanced quickly at the boy. There was no reproach in his eyes, only pain.

"I know," Carth replied sadly. "Maybe if I had…"

Dustil took a deep breath and shook his head. "No. Things were meant to happen this way. The Force united the two of you. I wouldn't have it any other way."

So his son was becoming wiser as well. Carth nodded. "Thank you, son."

Dustil lowered his gaze, a frown creasing his brow. "I hope things work out for the pair of you. Alexis is a good girl."

"But still only a girl. Sith Lord or no, she's as innocent as a child in some respects. The Jedi didn't do her any favors."

Dustil looked back up. "I don't think that they did anyone any favors. Perhaps Alexis can begin to rectify that."

"I'm sure she can."

Alexis slid into the room in the silence that followed. She was wearing a bright green t-shirt this time that hung to her knees. Her long hair hung down her back and her bare feet made no sound as she moved with a dancer's grace across the carpeted floor.

She stopped next to the bed and glanced over at Dustil, who sat in the room's only chair. Alexis clamored into bed with Carth and sat a good distance from him. She pooled the sheets around her waist and nestled herself up against a pillow, all in an uneasy silence. When she was done, she turned to them, her chin up and her eyes bright.

Carth gave her a reassuring smile and she allowed herself to smile back, if only a little. She was so hard on herself sometimes. Carth wished idly that she'd loosen up a bit. "So, what did you want to talk to us about?"

Alexis cleared her throat. "You guys have heard that I'm going to attempt to rebuild the Jedi Order, right?"

So, Carth had been correct. Alexis wanted Dustil to become a Jedi. Well, Carth had no objections. He'd often thought that Dustil would have been perfect for exactly that. Especially now that his anger from four years previous had worn away.

"Alexis, you don't have to ask. I'd be happy to serve the Jedi," Dustil said with certainty. Dustil was certainly a sharp young man. Carth was quite proud of him.

"Are you sure that that's what you want?" Carth asked carefully.

Alexis turned to look at him. She looked as if she thought he disapproved. "You don't think that it's a good idea?" she asked.

"Of course it's a good idea," Dustil said firmly.

Carth smiled at her. "I just wanted to make sure that Dustil really meant it. I think that he'll make an excellent Jedi."

Carth watched as his son turned a proud smile towards him. Carth nodded. "Thanks," the boy said.

Alexis watched them both with that soft, loving expression that she wiped away so quickly when she realized that it was there. Carth had to resist the urge to sigh. If only she'd openly turn that expression on him, he would feel complete again.

Dustil noticed her expression as well and looked away from the raw emotion on her face as if it pained him. "Kalen would like to be your Master," Alexis said finally, her eyes cooling once more and her expression hardening.

Dustil smiled at her. "I'd be happy to have her."

"Are you sure that you won't regret abandoning your career in engineering?" She asked him gently. Carth knew that she didn't want Dustil to feel trapped.

"Listen," Dustil said finally, wiping her hands across his eyes, "I know you won't believe me until I have slept on it. I'll go to bed and in the morning, I'll return to you with the same answer. Then will you believe me?"

Alexis nodded. "If you still feel this way in the morning, I promise that I'll leave you alone."

"Great. Now, go to sleep. You both need the rest," he said, standing. He left the room in an instant. Alexis leveled her uneasy gaze on Carth.

"So, are you staying here or going elsewhere to sleep?" Carth asked. He hoped that his tone masked how much he wanted her to stay. If she left, he wouldn't sleep a wink.

Without a word, Alexis made her way to his side and lowered her head onto his chest. She shut her eyes tightly and lay her palm on his chest, directly above his heart. Carth was so startled that he nearly pulled away. Voluntary dependence on another human being, hhmm? This was very out of character.

"Lexi?" He said gently, touching her face. She didn't open her eyes or speak, she just titled her face a little bit into his hand. Why was she behaving so strangely?

Carth slid down the bed until his head was resting on his pillow, pulling Alexis with him as he moved. She opened her eyes slowly when they were nestled down on the bed. He pulled the blankets up and gently began to rub at her back and her hair. Knowing she was skittish, he moved carefully, his caresses light.

Alexis let out a deep breath and slowly, her body relaxed completely against his. He could feel every tiny curve of her. She looked up at him, her eyes wide. He tilted his head forward and tenderly kissed each eyelid and the tip of her nose. She smiled and Carth pulled back, unwilling to go any farther. The next step was hers, no matter how long it took.

Alexis shut her eyes again and Carth continued his gentle ministrations. Her breathing relaxed into the deep, slow patterns of rest. He smiled contentedly down at her and kissed the top of her head. She smiled slightly, even in her sleep.