A/N - Hi everyone! Thanks for the reviews. Here's a tip for you: buy stock in tissue companies! There's going to be a run at the stores, if last chapter was any indication. For some of you more highly excitable readers, a tranquilizer may be good, too.
Disclaimer: I do not own the Dukes, and no infringements intended.
BLOOD BROTHERS
CHAPTER 10
LETTING GO
Jesse got Luke settled into his bed after helping him in from the barn. He was exhausted and needed his rest, and Jesse prayed that he might finally get some. He knew about the nightmares. Sometimes Luke talked, cried, or screamed in his sleep. He'd told them not to wake him, but Jesse wasn't about to let Luke suffer in the clutches of a dream. Before he ever had to disturb him, though, his nephew either quieted down or woke himself. Jesse hoped tonight he would just sleep.
The house had been full all day long with relatives and friends. Despite the fact that some had just been there for Christmas, they were back again. The parade had started a couple days ago, but this time only Luke and Bo were sleeping in their room. The others had been forced to bunk in the other rooms, and Coy, Vance, and Jeb were staying in the barn. They assured everyone they were quite comfortable between the hayloft and the sleeping bags. They weren't there for a vacation; they were there to help and offer support. It just seemed like that day there was more people than ever.
Everyone wanted to see Bo, and he had long ago given up his modesty. He just didn't have the strength to worry about it anymore. He slept through a few of the visits, wishing he could have slept through a few others.
Lulu Hogg was practically hysterical. She had always liked the Dukes, and whenever she was around she made sure that her husband and brother treated them nicely. She respected Jesse, and she and Daisy had gotten friendly through church activities. She didn't know the boys that well, but what she knew, she liked. They'd always been polite young men, and had helped her out on a few occasions. She was known for her dramatics, though no one questioned her sincerity. They did, however, not want her upsetting Bo, so she was not allowed to go any further than the door for a quick peek. The same was true of Boss and Rosco. Though they didn't quite mirror Lulu's grief, they were respectful.
Enos
and Cooter were allowed to spend a few minutes with Bo, and he spoke
with each of them. He told Enos to get off his duff and go after
Daisy, or he'd regret it forever. Cooter he made promise to look
after the family, especially Luke.
While their guests were bustling around, the Dukes each spent some private time with Bo. Daisy went first. He told her what he had told Enos, reminding her that he was a good man that really loved her. Then he told her to follow her own heart and make her own decisions. He thanked her for being there for him, acting as substitute mother and sister, and that he couldn't have asked for a better one. He told her that he loved her, and she told him that she loved him, too.
Uncle Jesse went next. Bo didn't know how to properly thank someone for taking them into their home, then raising and loving them as if they were their own. He tried, but he knew that he could never find the words to convey his gratitude. He told his uncle that he didn't remember his parents, and that to him, he and Aunt Lavinia were his mom and dad. He couldn't have asked for a better family if he'd hand picked them himself. Jesse confessed that because he'd been a baby when they got him, and they didn't have kids of their own, they'd always thought of him as theirs. He told Bo that he'd always been his baby and he always would be. Bo made him promise to look after Daisy and Luke, though he knew he didn't have to. He'd been doing that almost their whole lives.
Finally, Luke got to go. He and Bo had been joined at the hip since they were tots, so no one found it out of the ordinary.
"Luke?" Bo asked, as his cousin approached the bed.
"I'm here, Bo," he told him. taking his left hand in both of his.
Bo smiled, and lightly squeezed Luke's hand. Swallowing, he paused a minute. "Luke. Race, get married, have kids. I need you to be ok. Okay?"
"Sure. I'll name one after you. What do you think of Beauregard?"
"Ah, don't do that to the poor kid," Bo chuckled.
"How bout just Bo then?"
"You don't have to do that Luke," Bo told him.
"I know, but I will...If I ever have one."
"You will. Just don't make him be me."
"No one could ever be you," Luke choked, feeling he'd never spoken truer words.
"You know what I mean."
"Yeah. Okay," Luke whispered. He was only going along with Bo to make him happy. Luke didn't see much of a future for himself past the next few hours. He was agreeing with Bo verbally, but his mind had already decided that he'd be joining his cousin shortly. He couldn't tell Bo, though, cause he knew it would only upset him.
Whatever Luke had said or Bo was thinking, it caused the young man to grin. There wasn't anything funny or happy taking place, but Luke couldn't stop the small smile that it caused on his own face. Then he saw Bo turn serious, and for a minute, it really scared him.
"Bo?"
"I love ya, Luke."
"I love ya, too, little cousin."
"Would you do something for me?"
"Anything, Bo."
"Hold me?" Bo asked, reaching out his other arm.
Luke grabbed it in mid-air. He knew he'd done it a little too forcefully, but he wanted Bo to really be able to feel it. "Sure," he said, nodding as he felt the lump in his throat getting bigger. Climbing into the bed, he situated himself against the wall. When he was ready, he reached over and maneuvered Bo into place so that he was cradled in his arms. When he sure that his cousin was comfortable, he ripped the bed apart, grabbing the blankets and wrapping them around his shivering cousin.
"Thanks, Luke," Bo whispered, smiling again as he looked up at his cousin with his big blue eyes. "I love ya, always remember that."
"I will. I love you, too," Luke told him, leaning down and kissing his forehead.
Telling Luke that he loved him and to remember were the last words Bo said before drifting into unconsciousness a few minutes later.
Jesse and Daisy entered the room after a few more went by, taking in the scene before them. Luke was sitting there with his back against the wall and Bo in his arms. The tears were running down his face. He raised his eyes to his uncle, begging him to do something that he knew couldn't be done.
Daisy crawled onto the bed, back against the wall, sitting next to Luke. She rested her hand on Bo's shoulder, then leaned over to kiss his forehead. "I love you, Bo."
Jesse perched at the corner of the bed, also leaning over and kissing Bo's forehead. "I love you, too, Bo."
For possibly the first time in his life, Luke didn't even try to stop the waterworks. His cheeks were wet, and he couldn't believe that his tear ducts were even capable of producing that much liquid. He normally didn't cry in front of anyone. The few times he had, it had always been Bo, so it wasn't exactly inappropriate or terribly odd that Bo would be the one to elicit such a response. Under the circumstances, he didn't care. He doubted that anyone in the room would even notice. Jesse and Daisy had tears running down their faces, too.
They didn't know how long they sat that way. Time had no meaning. They could hear people in the other rooms, and knew that the house was full. It didn't matter to them. As far as they were concerned, they were the only ones in the house, just like they were the only ones in that room. For many years, they'd lived together. Since their aunt had died, it had just been the four of them. It was only right that they be together, alone, at this time, for whatever amount of time they had left.
Luke could remember that when Bo had been a baby, sometimes when he was sleeping, if someone stroked his cheek, he would smile. He'd forgotten all about it until he inadvertently did it and got the exact same reaction he'd seen eighteen years earlier. He didn't know whether to smile or to sob harder. He ended up doing both. Jesse and Daisy saw it, too, and responded with the same reaction; first a chuckle, then a whimper.
Luke tore his eyes away from his cousin's face and scanned the room for a second. He thought about all the years he and Bo had shared this room, and the few times that he had secretly wished for his own. He regretted thinking that way now, not even wanting to think about having the bedroom all to himself. Memories danced through his brain as he recalled things he hadn't thought about in years. He'd forgotten so many things, just like the way he forgot that his cousin smiled in his sleep if you caressed his cheek. He tried it again, just to see if the same thing would happen; it did. He silently cursed for allowing himself to forget all those wonderful times, fearful that eventually he might forget Bo all together. Setting his resolve, he told himself that would never happen. He wouldn't be around long enough to allow it. Over the past few weeks, he'd come to the realization that he couldn't or wouldn't go on without his cousin. He didn't want to, and didn't think he could, even if he tried. He suddenly understood what Bo had been feeling after reading the letter that made him believe Luke didn't love him, and never had. In his mind, he'd lost Luke, and that was what drove him to Widow's Peak. Luke couldn't think of a more appropriate place to join his cousin in eternity.
Bringing himself back to the present, Luke hugged Bo tighter. He studied his face as he saw the little color it had left draining. He felt Bo's breaths become deeper and fewer in between, and he squeezed even harder. Luke kept his eyes focussed on Bo, while Daisy looked to her uncle. Jesse put his hand on Bo's arm and Daisy followed suit. Then came the breath they were all dreading. It was a deep inhale, followed by a long exhale, then nothing.
Daisy broke down right there, leaning heavily against Luke as the sobs racked her body. "No," she kept repeating.
Jesse just stared at his boy, looking lost.
Luke hugged him closer, his sobs mimicking Daisy's.
No one knew how long they stayed that way, but Jesse came to his senses first. He still had two kids to take care of, and this wasn't going to do them any good. Saying goodbye was one thing, but this would do more harm if he let it get out of control. "We need to let him go," he whispered.
Daisy, always the obedient one, crawled off the bed like her uncle asked her. Taking one last, long look, she opened the door and went out into the living room. In the background, Jesse could hear the condolences already starting, along with the crying.
"Come on, Luke. You gotta let him go," he told his eldest to no avail. He tried reasoning with him, but Luke wasn't giving any indication that he was ready to give Bo up. "Son, please," he begged, before reaching out for his youngest. Luke instinctively strengthened his hold, struggling to get both he and Bo away from Jesse's outstretched arms. "Luke, come on," he said in a more demanding voice that didn't get any better results than the gentle one he'd tried.
Jesse slid off the bed, knowing he was going to need help. He couldn't let Luke sit there like that any longer. It wasn't healthy for him, and there were things that needed to be tended to. He returned a few minutes later with Cooter, Coy, and Vance. Doc Appleby was following close behind. He didn't know whether he'd be tending to Bo, Luke, or both, but Jesse seemed frantic when he asked for help.
It took all three of them to pry Bo's body away from his older cousin. Coy and Vance took care of Bo, letting the doctor do a quick check before taking him out to the vehicle that had been on stand-by. Bo would be taken to the local mortuary where he'd be prepared, then returned for the traditional style wake. Jesse was beginning to regret the decision to continue that tradition. This was Bo's home, and he deserved to be able to spend his last moments in the house he'd grown up in and loved. Jesse had always felt that way after someone passed on. However, he hadn't given any thought to Luke, and seeing him now, he didn't know if Luke would be able to handle seeing Bo lying in state for two entire days. He owed his youngest nephew the chance, but he still had a responsibility to his eldest. For now, all he could do was to go along with what he'd planned. If it got too much for Luke, he'd have to think of something else.
Cooter crawled on to the bed. It felt odd to even be on it, knowing that Bo had slept in it his entire life. Yet, Luke was his immediate concern. Sliding his arm around his friend, he tried to coax him off the bed. "C'mon on buddyroe," he said, easing him to the edge as he helped him to stand.
Doc Appleby and Jesse were standing next to the dresser, and the doctor was writing something. "Time of death, four thirty-two," he stated.
"No...," Luke screamed, reaching out blindly.
