Disclaimer: Since it get redundant and stupid after awhile. This is going to last for the entire story. I don't own final fantasy 8. It belongs to Squaresoft. Therefore the characters and place in this story belong to them, except Serena she is a figment of my own imagination.
Chapter 1: Heartbreak
Selphie sat on her bed looking at the note in her hand. She wasn't surprised someone had a secret crush on her and wanted to talk. The note was brief without a signature. It simply said, "Selphie we need to talk, meet me on the second floor balcony at midnight." She just didn't know if she should go. She knew it would crush Irvine, if he found out if she was sneaking away to see another guy, yet she couldn't help her self. She had secret crushes on several other guys, but she never dared touch any of them. It would be a violation of her love to Irvine. She sure could look though, after all a girl is aloud to fantasize.
She is in a committed relationship with Irvine and she loves him. Still she couldn't help but wonder if maybe Squall had left Rinoa after all these years. Selphie had a crush on him since the first time she ran into him. She was such a klutz, but he showed her around Balamb Garden anyways. She thought he was the nicest guy ever. Then she met Irvine and the sparks flew. Irvine made her feel special and every girl loves to feel special. Still she couldn't forget about her commander. She was always around him; they were friends. She was just excited some one would send her a love note. She was always a sucker for love notes. She had to find out who wrote the letter, or else she would always wonder.
She finally stood up to get ready. She slipped out of her SeeD uniform looking at her body in her mirror. Her slim body had the perfect proportions. She touched herself letting her feeling take her over every inch of her body. Snapping back to reality, Selphie slipped into her orange sun dress. She curled her hair up and smiled at how good she looked. She glanced at the time only to realize she was already running late. Grabbing her room key she bolted out the door.
Selphie ran up the stairs not wanting to wait for the elevator. She couldn't wait to see who her secret admirer was. She had always imagined her prince charming sending her love note and flowers before revealing himself. Then he would be waiting to meet her on a white horse. Then the two of them would jet off into the sunset together to live happily ever after.
Selphie stood in dead shock as she saw Squall looking out into the night sky. She caught her breath before she walked up to him. He was her best friend's boyfriend there was no way they could ever be, although every inch of her body wanted to feel him. She stood calm; she wasn't going to let a silly crush come between her and Rinoa. The only person that even knew about the crush was Quistis because Selphie always talked about him before Rinoa came into the picture.
"I think she is seeing someone behind my back," Squall said solemnly. He never even turned around to acknowledge Selphie. He just kept looking out at the stars waiting for a shooting star to wish on, maybe his wish would come true. He and Rinoa would get through this hard time and their relationship would only be stronger. He was so hurt from thinking Rinoa didn't love him anymore he could barely breathe. He had done everything in his power for her. He couldn't imagine why she would want to be with another man.
Selphie silently walked up to stand next to him. She didn't know what to say. She could feel his pain. She had never felt anyone feel so much despair. She laid her hand on her commander's shoulder trying to comfort him. She never imagined a girl would not like Squall. To her, he was the ultimate package. Squall was sexy, strong, smart, and sensitive although he never shows it. It didn't make any sense.
"You have to talk to her for me," Squall cried turning to face Selphie. "I have to know the truth." He could feel the tears start to fall down his face. He never showed anyone his vulnerable side, but he felt comfortable around Selphie. Her cried harder than he ever had before. Rinoa was his life and he couldn't lose her. He would rather die than to lose her.
"Um," Selphie thought out loud, "I don't know." She couldn't betray her best friend like that. Rinoa would hate Selphie if she went and told some guy all of Rinoa's secrets. She didn't know if she could stand her best friend hating her, but she couldn't stand seeing Squall in so much pain. She didn't know what to do; she was going to disappoint one of them either way.
"Please," Squall pleaded. "I will do anything to repay you." The look on his face was indescribable. He wanted to know the truth more than he wanted to live. He lived to love Rinoa, without her he felt he was nothing. He could feel his very soul crying and his heart shattering every time he spoke her name.
Selphie sighed. If she helped him, she just might fall in love with him. She couldn't break her own heart. She couldn't let herself fall for him. She couldn't forget about the love she had for Irvine. Squall was her commander and friend and that was all he was. She knew that was all he could ever be to her. She couldn't help herself. Seeing him cry was so heartbreaking.
"Would you do it if I told you I thought it was Irvine?"
"They wouldn't do that to us…"
"It started when we went to help rebuild Trabia."
"Well there you go, they both came with us."
"However they both left early."
"So did Zell, that doesn't mean a thing."
"That's why I want you to ask her."
"Because you think it may be my boyfriend? If it is, she wouldn't tell me."
"No, because if it isn't your boyfriend she'll tell you. Its just that since Irvine left early I thought you would be more interested in asking her ."
"Fine, I'll ask her."
"Really?"
"Yeah."
"Thanks Selph," Squall said hugging her. He immediately pulled away when he realized what he was doing. He smiled and quickly walked away leaving Selphie completely confused.
Selphie slowly walked back to the dormitories. She never thought that Squall would be waiting for her. She also thought that he would never cry in front of her. It was just too much for her little brain to take in. She couldn't even think and walk at the same time.
Rinoa ran into Selphie as she was sneaking back into the female dormitories with a tray full of midnight goodies. Both of the girls screamed until they realized who they ran into. Rinoa smiled at her friend. She couldn't help but laugh at how her snack got all over Selphie.
"It's a good thing I'm starving," Selphie joked. "Now all I have to do is eat my shirt."
"I'm so sorry Selph," Rinoa apologized. "I should have been watching where I was going." She offered her friend the one napkin that she grabbed and they both laughed knowing the napkin wouldn't help at all.
"No," Selphie replied. "I'm sorry my shirt ate your food."
Rinoa picked up the little amount of food that had fallen on the floor. She smiled at her friend. It always amazed her how Selphie could be happy about everything. "I have to take the tray back anyways why don't we grab another bite to eat," Rinoa offered.
"Isn't the cafeteria closed by now?"
"Yeah I have this deal with the cafeteria lady. If I give her extra gil, she sneaks me the food."
"I have some snacks in my room. We can have a lil slumber party and talk about boys."
Rinoa smiled and nodded her head. The two friends walked back to the dormitories hand in hand. Nothing could separate them.
"So," Rinoa said as she sat on Selphie's bed. "How are thing with mister wonderful."
"They are a little odd. We haven't talked since I got back from Trabia garden. Its like he's keeping a secret from me." Selphie pouted as she changed out of her favorite dress and into a giant t-shirt. She open one of her desk drawers and pulled out a bag of chips and threw them to Rinoa on her bed. As she walked to her personal mini fridge, Selphie asked," You don't know what he's keeping from me do you?"
Rinoa looked at her friend. She did in fact know what he was keeping from her and she knew that it would devastate her. She gulped knowing that it was her duty to tell her. "Selph?" Rinoa asked," Do you love him?"
Selphie smiled at Rinoa as she walked back to the bed with dip and a few sodas. "Yeah," Selphie gushed. "I really think I do. I mean he's my first in a lot of ways."
"I'm sorry to have to tell you this but…" Rinoa replied as she opened her soda, "He's cheating on you."
Selphie wanted to scream at friend. She couldn't believe Squall was right. Selphie was going to rip Rinoa to shreds. How could Rinoa ever do that to her? How could she sleep with her boyfriend?
"I saw him in the secret room with some curly haired blonde," Rinoa added quickly. "I was in there to meet Zell. It was his first night back from Trabia and we wanted to test something."
Selphie was so shocked at her friend's confession she didn't know what to say. If Squall and Rinoa couldn't keep their love going, what did that mean for the rest of the world? "I… Umm," Selphie cried, "I don't know what to say."
"I took pictures," Rinoa said. "I was going to tell you, but I didn't know what to say."
"I need to go be alone right now," Selphie said changing into a pair of jeans and a halter top. She pulled her hair back so they formed two small piggy tails. And then she grabbed her jacket and smiled at Rinoa. "I'm sorry I just can't be in here right now," Selphie cried.
"I understand. I'll just go back to my room. I'll be there if you need me."
"I need you to go tell what you told me to Squall," Selphie said calmly. "He deserves to know the truth. I don't know what you were in there testing with Zell, but I'm pretty sure it had to do with your hormones."
"I never wanted you to be hurt," Rinoa pleaded. "I just wanted to be honest."
"You didn't hurt me, he did," Selphie replied with no emotion. "That's why I have to go talk to him."
"I don't want to hurt Squall either," Rinoa replied looking at the floor as she walked over to Selphie. "If you think I should tell him, I will talk to him first thing in the morning."
"Good."
Rinoa hugged her friend and walked back to her dorm.
Irvine grinned as Serena tiptoed into his room. He was just about to go to bed. He needed to get a perfect nights rest. He knew tomorrow he would see Selphie for the first time since she got back; after all it was their one year anniversary. Looking at Serena, he suddenly felt guilty yet completely aroused.
"I just didn't want you to be lonely," Serena stated. She was twirling her long perfect blonde hair. She was only wearing her pink lacey bra, matching thong, and a pink see through robe. She slipped out of her robe right before she crawled in and pulled the covers over her luscious body.
"I stare in amazement at the mold of perfection in front of me.," Irvine teased. "When will I be able to touch it?"
"Whenever you want," Serena stated as she sat on Irvine's thighs. She pulled down his boxers revealing his hard and ready cock. She licked her lips as she continued to remove his shirt revealing every inch of his naked body for her eyes. She bent down and kissed him passionately.
Irvine wanting to touch her, took off the little bit of clothing Serena was actually wearing. He moaned as he guided her body to rest on his cock. They both wanted the same thing, to be wrapped up in one another. He grinned as he helped her move her body all around his cock. He loved the way he felt inside her and the way she loved him inside her. It was a bond he could share with no other woman. Selphie just couldn't please him the way Serena could.
Serena took control of the rendezvous. She pinned his hand above his head and kissed him with more fire then a volcano full of lava. She continued to ride his cock until she could hear him scream in utter pleasure. The hunger that burned inside her could only be settled by the love of the man inside her. She knew it was a sin. She knew he had a girlfriend, but she couldn't help herself. Serena loved everything about Irvine. He was the perfect sexual partner. He knew how to please her and she knew how to please him. That was all that mattered to her.
Selphie didn't bother knocking when she heard the grunt and moans coming from inside Irvine's door. She had to see for herself who the woman was. She had to see the truth. She couldn't hold back the tears and the pain of what was going on. It was too real for her. She wanted to scream out in agony. "Ahem," Selphie coughed. "If you don't mind, Blondie I'd like to talk to my boyfriend."
Serena continued riding Irvine. She wasn't about to stop she could all most feel herself come. She could even feel Irvine working his magic and he tenderly rubbed her clit. "We're busy," Serena moaned. "Come back another time."
Selphie never gets aggressive. She normally can hold her temper in unless she is in battle. She lunged forward and pulled Serena's naked body off of Irvine's. Then she threw her out into the hallway shutting and locking the door behind her. Selphie stood there not knowing what to say. She was so hurt she couldn't speak.
"Selph," Irvine said. "It's not what you think."
"What she was helping you study for your SeeD exam and fell on your dick?" Selphie asked screaming on top of her lungs. She didn't care if she woke up everyone else she was pissed and hurt. Selphie just stared at him. She couldn't believe him. She always knew he was a ladies man, but he told her he loved her. He said that she was the only girl for him.
"Well," Irvine replied. "No of course not. She doesn't know anything about SeeD."
"So that makes it alright to sleep with her?" Selphie was screaming even louder now. "I hope it was worth it. I hope the sex was excellent. You know what? You are the biggest asshole in the fucking universe. I don't know why I ever thought I loved you. Rinoa and Quistis warned me about you. It's so over. I never want to talk to your nasty punk ass again. I hope you pass that exam, and when you go on your first mission, I hope you die."
'Selph," Irvine pleaded. "I love you."
"I don't believe your lies anymore." Selphie said more quietly know. "I don't deserve to be treated like a dog. I have feelings you know. I gave you everything, including my virginity, to you. But I guess that doesn't mean anything to you does it? I always wanted to stay a virgin until I met the one and I thought you were the one. I thought you were my prince charming. I thought wrong, because my prince charming would never sleep with another woman behind my back. He would cherish and honor my love."
Irvine didn't know what to say. He didn't want to lose Selphie, but he wanted to feel Serena. He really did love Selphie. It was just he was a man and he liked sex. Sex was just something Selphie was never good at. Serena could please him.
"You don't have anything else to say? So, it's really over between us?" Selphie questioned trying to get an answer. "Fine, I guess I'll just leave then. Umm. If you want to talk to me you know where my room is." Selphie said as she headed for the door.
"You just told me you wanted me to die." Irvine said confused, "Now you want to talk to me?"
"I love you Irvine and part of me always will," Selphie whispered as she left his room. She closed her eyes as she shut the door on her relationship with Irvine. She tried to wipe the nonstop tears from her eyes but they just kept rolling down and burning her cheeks.
"Need a friend?" Squall asked from across the hall. He had been standing there since he first heard Selphie screaming. He had never heard or saw her act that way in all the time that he knew her. Just when he thought he finally understood her, she changed on him.
Selphie looked up surprised to see Squall standing there. She was surprised at how much Rinoa had really changed him. He was so much sweeter now than he was when she first met him. It was a nice surprise to have him there. He was the only person who would be able to understand. She knew he was going through the same thing. She shook her head yes. She needed a friend that would understand her pain.
Squall opened his arms to the brunette for a hug. She came running towards him in return. He grabbed he damp hands and led her to his dorm. He walked right to his bed and sat her down. He had never seen the bubbly teen sad. She always was happy about something. "Do you wanna talk about it?"
"What is there to talk about?"
"Irvine…"
"Why do men think with their dicks, I mean us women don't think with our boobs."
"I don't know what to tell you Selphie. I mean sometimes a relationship goes smoothly and according to plan. Then sometimes there is a bump in the road, a problem that can't be just forgiven and forgotten. I know that if you love him, thing may get better. People can change if you let them."
"But how can I forgive him for what he has done?"
"If you love him, your heart will find a way. It won't be easy and it will definetly be painful, but it will be worth it in the end. Love always is."
"I don't want to love him if he doesn't love me."
"I think he does. He's young and stupid though. He wants to have sex and not with just one person apparently. At our age sex is a big deal to some people. You have to understand sex and love are to different things. Some people look at sex like it is an act to prove your undying love. Others look at sex like it is just another thrill ride and you have to find the best ride."
"But if he loves me why does he have to have sex with someone else. I do have female body parts; it's not like I'm a guy."
"Maybe he knows that now, he just needed to be shown how much he really does love you."
"How?"
"You don't miss your water, till your well runs dry."
"This well has been dried and it has collapsed."
"You just have to ask yourself if you love him."
"I do with all my heart."
"Then destiny will find a way for you two to be together."
"You think?"
"Love conquers all, right?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
"I thought I heard you tell him to come talk to you."
"I did."
"Then if he comes, it was meant to be."
"What if he doesn't?"
"Then I am sure you will find your true prince charming."
"Thanks Squall. I never thought I'd be able to talk to you like this. I like this side of you. I hope things work out for you and Rinoa. If there is anything I can do just ask."
"Thanks, I will."
"I think, I'll go wait for him to knock on my door now," Selphie said as she hugged Squall. He really was a great friend. She was glad he was there to talk to. She felt a lot better now that she had talked to him."
Talking to her self, Rinoa paced in front of Squall's dormitory. She never had imagined this day would come. She loved him and he loved her, yet they had grown apart. It was painful just to think about how much it would hurt Squall to find out she cheated on him with one of his closest friends. She knew it would devastate him. She didn't want to tell him, because that would mean she would lose him. She didn't want it to be the complete end. She just wanted to try dating other people for awhile and be friends.
"Are you just going to stand there all day or are you going to come in?" Squall asked as he opened his door. He had heard Rinoa talking to herself for approximately an hour before he actually got up to greet her. She never knocked or anything. He knew what she had to tell him wasn't going to be a good thing, but he knew they could work through any problem that came their way.
"Hi," Rinoa whispered as she hugged him and led him to the bed. She looked into his eyes and saw his longing to know the truth. She knew he felt something was wrong between them, but he had such a pure love. He finally opened his heart up to her. She was the first person to see the sensitive and romantic side of him. He showed it in the way he made love to her. He was always so gentle about it, afraid he might hurt her somehow.
"Is something wrong," Squall asked looking at Rinoa's blank expression. She was normally ecstatic to see him. She would normally start talking about how her skills have improved and how she was going to be a SeeD someday. She normally couldn't wait to devour him in her kisses. Today was different. She couldn't even look at him.
Rinoa sighed. She didn't know where to begin. She still loved Squall and part of her always will. She just felt something was missing in their relationship. He always seemed to be gone on some top secret mission lately. He never seemed to have any more time to spend with her. She knew that being a commander wasn't as easy as just snapping your fingers; she just thought she wouldn't be so alone. She knew he dedicated every spare moment he had to her, but for some reason it wasn't enough.
Squall just looked at Rinoa. He wanted to ask her so many questions. The same questions he had asked Selphie to ask her. He felt that if he asked her he would lose her. He knew that if she loved him and wanted to be with him she would confess why she has been so distant. She would tell him why she couldn't look him in the eye anymore.
"Squall," Rinoa cried letting the tears fall down her cheeks. He was the last person she would ever want to hurt. He was the last person she would want to betray. She can still hear all of the promises they made to one another, their promises of love and honesty. All the promises she broke the second she kissed Zell.
Squall didn't like the tone of her voice. He was starting to believe that he was about to lose Rinoa. There was so much he wanted to tell her. There was so much that was left unsaid. He looked at his nightstand where he had a jewelry box in clear view. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with her and only her. There was no life without her.
"When you were in Trabia, I kissed Zell and it led to some deeper feelings and actions."
"You what?"
"I thought it was just a mistake at first, but then we kissed again."
"I thought you loved me…"
"I do…It's just…"
"It's just what? Did you need a bigger piece of meat?"
"I just need someone to be here."
"I will always be there when you need me."
"I'm so sorry Squall. I never meant to hurt you."
"Then why did you?"
"People make mistakes."
"Are you saying I'm a mistake? Are you telling me that you would rather be wrapped up in Zell's arms?"
"No…Yes…Maybe…It's complicated."
"I gave you everything I could."
"I know I'm so sorry.'
Squall started to cry. He normally didn't like to show his weaknesses, but with Rinoa he thought he found his soul mate. He thought she would always be there to wipe away the tears and give him strength. He suddenly realized she wouldn't be there anymore. She would be there to support Zell not him.
I still want to be friends," Rinoa cried as she stood up to let herself out. When Squall didn't reply, she took it as a hint to get out of his dorm. She ran out of his room crying. She had destroyed the one person she made a promise not to. She felt like the worse being in the entire world.
Squall stood up and changed into a pair of leather pants and tight fitting white shirt. He had to get out of the room he spent so many countless nights in. He needed to be somewhere alone. He needed to think about life and if it was really worth all the pain that came with it.
Selphie sat at her desk with her sketch pad. She loved to draw. It was an easy way to let off all the steam she had. Over the course of the night, she managed to draw three sketches of Irvine getting torn to shreds by some type of monster. In one sketch she had him accidentally shoot off his own dick. But the one she spent the most time on was the one she was drawing of Squall. There was something about the man that was so amazingly beautiful. She was drawing him the way she saw him on the balcony. She had been working n the drawing a little here and a little there. She wanted this sketch to turn out perfect.
She sighed and rolled up the sketch of Squall. She needed to see him again. She needed to see his pain and feel the passion she could feel inside him. She was suddenly starting to have a even bigger crush on him. Although she could never have him, the thought of having his muscular ripped body against hers sent chills all over her body. She had always admired his strength in battle, but she was starting to admire his strength as a lover. She always wanted a man to love her the way he loved Rinoa.
She pushed her chair back and stood up from her desk. She just needed to soak up in a bubble bath and ease her mind. She stood in front of her closet contemplating what to wear for the day. She finally settled her mind on wearing her black lace dress that she wore with a matching pair of underwear and a bra. She needed to feel sexy. She needed to know that Irvine cheated on her because he is going through some type of mind life crisis. She grabbed all her clothes and headed fro the bathroom.
Selphie started to run her hot water as she poured bubbled bath into her tub. She smiled as the smell of flowers filled up her bathroom. She was definitely going to be relaxed soon enough. She waited until her tub was three fourths full of hot water and switched to cold so it didn't burn her skin. After her tub was almost full, she shut off the water and climbed into the tub. She let herself sink below the bubble to where she laid perfectly comfortable.
Selphie was in her tub for almost an hour just thinking about her self and life in general. She always tried to lend a helping hand, but it seemed everyone else just kicked her in the ass. She couldn't imagine what was actually happening in her life, it was almost as if her life got turned upside down. She could swear; she had entered an alternate universe and none of what was happening was actually real.
Selphie smiled as she climbed out of her tub. She felt completely refreshed and relax. It was just what she need. She dried off and climbed into her lingerie dress. It was Sunday and she didn't plan on seeing anyone, so she thought she would dress to impress herself. She put on a little bit of makeup, just enough to highlight her eyes and hair and make her look more mature. She didn't even bother curling her hair up into her trademark style. Selphie just ruffled it up in the wet and messy look. She thought it fit her mood more.
Selphie smiled at her self in the mirror and decided to go lay down. She was going to spend the entire day cuddling with her teddy bear and watching her favorite movies. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw a body lying on her bed. She could have sworn she locked her door.
