As soon as they arrived in the nursery, Ashfoot scolded him most fiercely.
"Do you know how worried we were?" she fretted.
"Sorry." Crowkit mumbled.
Ashfoot huffed. "You're too mischievous, Crowkit," she sighed. "Do you know what I thought? I thought ThunderClan took you! You could've died!"
"But I didn't. That's it, Ashfoot," Crowkit retorted, starting to feel annoyed. "I said I was sorry."
The moment he said that, he regretted it. The burning look in Ashfoot's eyes scorched him. "So? I can't go on, knowing you might sneak off again! How would you feel if we didn't look for you? Or I was missing? Or your future kit, when... when your mate has died as well!" Sniffing, the gray queen sank back.
Crowkit circled Ashfoot nervously. "Ashfoot..."
Ashfoot ignored him.
Feeling too bad to hang around, he shuffled out of the nursery, hoping Ashfoot won't stop and scold him again.
Tornear was sitting patiently outside. "Now," he chuckled, "everyone heard the fuss."
Crowkit started to bristle. "It wasn't my fault!" he defended.
"How was it not? You know Ashfoot's unstable. She's been dealing with a lot of grief. Don't worry her more." Tornear replied.
"But it's just so hard! I want to get an adventure!" Crowkit squeaked.
Tornear gazed at him. "My brother is Mudclaw." he started slowly, "and we were all in a hurry to become apprentices."
"So?"
"So we waited."
"AW!" Crowkit groaned. "That's hardly a story, Tornear!"
"It's not," Tornear agreed, "but it's a good moral. It's against the warrior code to be apprenticed before six moons, because then you are big and strong enough to handle battle situations, even if the battle comes at your very first day."
"You don't go on battle if that's your first day," Crowkit countered.
Tornear sighed. "It's just an example."
"Yeah. Not a good one, though."
"My point is, Crowkit, that you want to be a warrior, and a good warrior. Right?"
"Right!" squeaked Crowkit.
Tornear gave a low purr. "Good. Then you'll wait. If you don't, you'll be disobeying the warrior code, that has been made for reasons. Now, until Ashfoot wakes up, you might go to the elders' den and listen to Morningflower's stories about the code. There are separate and very logical reasons about the code, Crowkit. Morningflower herself has gone through many troubles to understand that."
Crowkit remembered his mother's unfinished words when she had explained Morningflower going to the elders. "A reason she retired?"
Tornear looked, surprised, but nodded. "Yes."
"Tell me! Or I'll ask Morningflower myself."
Amusement sparked in the tom's eyes. "Fine. You've heard of Tigerstar, did you?"
"He... led BloodClan here." Blood boiled in Crowkit. "He's the reason my father's dead." he mewed bitterly.
"Yes. But back when he was Tigerclaw, Brokenstar drove WindClan out of the territory. I was quite young, younger than now, Whitetail an apprentice, and Onewhisker a mentor. I was a warrior, and failed to protect my home. When we were returning home, the medicine cat Barkface told us of a needless death..." He shook his head. "What am I saying. This happened a lot later." He gave a small chuckle. "Maybe I should retire, too!"
"No way, Tornear."
"Anyway, that death... happened, and later, a whole lot later, when Whitetail got her name, and Onewhisker had a new apprentice, Morningflower's son, Gorsepaw, died by Tigerclaw's claws."
Crowkit gasped. "Oh, no!"
"That's why Morningflower's especially so grief-stricken when it comes to Tigerstar."
Crowkit sighed. "My family faced so many tragedies." he mumbled.
"Yes. But they still stand strong, and you shall be a great warrior, Crowkit, like you want."
Crowkit straightened, eyes sparkling. "Oh, yes! I will, don't worry. Do you know who's going to be my mentor, Tornear?"
Tornear shook his head.
"I wish it was you." Crowkit grinned.
"Don't you wish it was Tallstar or Mudclaw? After all, they are great warriors." Tornear objected.
"But I'm scared of them." Crowkit mumbled. "They're just so... so high! High, so high that I look up to them. Literally. I have the crane my neck to stare at Mudclaw. And they... they're... just so scary." He sank back.
Tornear shrugged. "Mudclaw may be, but Tallstar is a great warrior, and friendly, Crowkit. And by the time you're an apprentice, you'll be almost as big as a warrior, anyway. You won't have to crane your neck."
"Yeah, Ashfoot told me I was growing," Crowkit agreed.
"You are. And Tallstar was your father's mentor, Crowkit. Don't be so scared of Tallstar."
Crowkit nodded. Then, hesitating slightly, he asked, "Should I go and apologize to Ashfoot? About, you know, sneaking out?"
The answer flew back to Crowkit instantly. "Of course. Why do you hesitate about that?"
The dark-gray kit hesitated. In a small voice, he replied, "Because she's angry at me right now. She won't listen to me."
"She's your mother. She loves you, and will forgive you."
"But what if she's so mad she won't be my mother again?"
"Trust me. She won't. Sure, my mother was mad at Mudclaw and me when we were kits plenty of times, but she never disowned us."
"Really?"
"Really. Do you think I'd lie to you?"
Crowkit sighed. "But she's just so angry!"
"Go and apologize."
Nodding, Crowkit started towards the nursery, feeling the encouraging gaze of Tornear behind him.
Taking a deep breath, he entered, and circled Ashfoot. "Ashfoot?" he whimpered.
Ashfoot opened one eye.
"I'm sorry about sneaking out. I felt... well, nobody cared about me. Only Deadfoot." He struggled not to keep his tone bitter. "Anyway, I wanted to take an adventure. I wanted to see how it was like, being leader! But I was wrong." He struggled to say that, putting down his pride for a moment. "I was wrong. Wrong to leave and let you worry, when you were already... distressed."
Ashfoot sighed. "True, but... it's fine. Kits always do that." She nuzzled Crowkit.
Crowkit sighed. His mother had forgiven him!
"Can I... go out and play?"
Ashfoot opened the other eye. "With whom? Whitetail?"
"Nah, she's too busy. I was thinking Morningflower or Tornear."
Ashfoot smiled. "Of course you can."
Feeling fresh, Crowkit bounded out to Tornear. "She forgave me!" he squealed.
"I told you so!"
"I'm going to Morningflower now, asking about the codes."
"Glad you're taking my advice, Crowkit."
