A NINE-GUN SALUTE

by ingrid

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The conference aboard Colonial One was a tense one. Even though Earth had been found, some ... issues ... still remained.

"So, Mr. Gaeta, you say you found the International Astronomical Union and were able to attend one of their meetings, is this correct?" Adama asked, his hands folded on his lap.

Gaeta nodded. "Yes, sir. They were having a conference."

"About what?"

Gaeta bit his lip, looking somewhat hesitant, but he continued anyway. "They were taking a vote on the status of the ninth planet of this solar system. After most of the scientists left for home, the remainder decided that the ninth planet wasn't really a planet, so they revoked its, well, charter? I'm not sure. It was a bit confusing."

Col. Tigh, who'd been skeptical about this entire endeavor from day one, cut in. "They say there's no ninth planet in this system?" He jerked a thumb toward Colonial One's porthole windows. "Are you talking about that planet we passed by a couple of days ago?"

Now Gaeta looked really uncomfortable. "Yes, sir. That planet."

"What the hell ..." Tigh snapped, as he was cut off by a sighing Adama.

"Were they serious, Mr. Gaeta?" he asked.

Gaeta nodded sadly. "They were, sir. And quite happy about it too. There seemed to be some sort of celebration. I'm not sure what that poor planet did to them, but it seemed they were very happy to get rid of it. To be honest, it was rather unsettling."

Adama's mouth tightened as he turned to President Roslin. "Madame President..."

But she was already holding her head in her hands and shaking it miserably. "You don't have to say it." She looked up, defeated. "You were right all along, gentlemen. These people are just too damned dumb for us to settle with." She tapped her nails in annoyance as Adama squeezed her shoulder sympathetically. "I don't understand it. This wasn't in the prophecy!"

"We'll start plotting a course to another habitable planet immediately," Adama said firmly. "Mr. Gaeta, do me a favor and on your final trip down to close up shop down there, hand one of them the telescope that's in my office. Tell him it's a gift from someone who hopes he'll use it wisely."

"Yes, sir," Gaeta replied with a salute. He paused before leaving. "Oh, by the way, sir, the planet was named 'Pluto'."

"Poor Pluto," Col Tigh grumbled. "We should give it a nine-gun salute on the way out of this hole."

"I think that's a good idea," Adama agreed. still patting the shoulder of Laura Roslin who was silently banging her forehead against her desk.

Repeatedly.

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A/N: Pluto will always be a planet to me!