♥As always, thanks to all my reviewers!♥
Title: "Tenipuri Online!"
Author: All4thebasilisk
Rating: As of now, I'll stick with PG.
Summary: All the Kantou schools have arranged a secret "Keyboard Pal" program for the tennis players. Each player selects a screenname and must correspond with whomever he is randomly given online. But as the name implies, the two keyboard buddies don't know whom they've been given…
Pairings: We'll see…
Notes: Author's notes will be enclosed in parentheses throughout the story.And without further ado, let the instant messaging begin!
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(My apologies for last time's crummy Inui-Yanagi chapter- I was exhausted at the time… I'll try to make it up to you this time around…)
From: Yanagi Renji (Dataman2)
To: Inui Sadaharu (Dataman)
There is a ninety percent chance that you are also investigating who is Keyboard Pals with whom, Sadaharu, so I thought that we should team up and increase the chances of knowing all the Keyboard Pals in advance by fifty percent. There is a very high probability that you have been thinking the same way and that this email is unnecessary, so I will simply expect you to be online at eight o'clock tonight. I will speak with you then.
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From: Sengoku Kiyosumi (LuckyTiger)
To: Minami Kentarou (Yamabuchou)
Lucky! I'm finally going to speak to my Keyboard Pal. It's going to be tougher than any tennis game I've ever played, though, because I'm going to have to hide my true nature! Yup, I'm serious! Not one "lucky," not even one mention of all the cute girls that might be at my Keyboard Pal's school! I'm just going to play it cool. I hope that luck is on my side, though. What will I do without my "lucky?" This will be truly difficult…
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From: Fuji Yuuta (NotJustOtouto)
To: Yanagisawa Shinya (Who'sADuckDane?)
It's amazing! My Keyboard Pal and I really get along. We talk about all sorts of real stuff- like siblings and tennis and school, and he's really helpful! He's an older brother, and he's always advising me on how to deal with my aniki and get along with him better. Since I started getting advice from "Yamasurname," my whole relationship with my brother has changed drastically! Sometimes my Pal gets a little weird, though… sort of depressed and evasive when I ask him about his brother. Who knows? Maybe their relationship isn't as great as it was when he first told me about it…
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From: Dan Taichi (DanDanDanDan)
To: Akutsu Jin (OuttaMyWay)
My Keyboard Pal is great, desu! He wasn't so talkative at first, desu, but now I think he's adjusted to this whole program and is giving me tips in tennis play, desu! I think this whole program is great, and I'll bet everyone agrees, desu! Do you, Akutsu-sempai? I heard that Banji-sensei made you get a Keyboard Pal, and I hope you're having fun, too, desu!
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INSTANT MESSAGING
(There WILL be revelations in this chapter… but nothing you didn't already know…)
GettingDumbAndDumber: Sadaharu?
IntellectuallyChallenged: I'm here.
GettingDumbAndDumber: Good. Let's begin comparing notes.
IntellectuallyChallenged: On the second day of the program, I questioned the Seigaku regulars about their Keyboard Pals. Oishi told me, "he's very… confident… but we shouldn't be discussing this, should we?"
GettingDumbAndDumber: 68 percent chance Oishi Syuichiroh is paired up with Atobe Keigo.
IntellectuallyChallenged: This time, the other 32 percent is correct. I tailed Oishi home, and he met up with Atobe Keigo. Atobe denied it.
GettingDumbAndDumber: There's only an eighteen percent chance that Atobe would lie.
IntellectuallyChallenged: Exactly. I have compiled all the data, and the most logical person has come up.
GettingDumbAndDumber: Assuming the mystery player isn't trying to conceal his identity by acting the exact opposite way he'd generally be. In that case, the most logical person may not be correct.
IntellectuallyChallenged: Then you also believe that it's most likely Wakato Hiroshi.
GettingDumbAndDumber: But if it's someone exactly the opposite- perhaps my teammate Sanada Genichirou or yours Tezuka Kunimitsu- all our calculations could be moot.
IntellectuallyChallenged: What do you suggest?
GettingDumbAndDumber: We hack into the computer system tomorrow night. There's a ninety-four percent chance that if we work together, we can eavesdrop on their next conversation… not to mention all the other Keyboard Pals'…
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NotSuperstitious: Hello, Keyboard Pal!
QuicktoAnger: Hey. Lucky we were both online at the same time, huh?
NotSuperstitious: Uh… yeah. But don't use that…word… next time, okay? I don't believe in coincidences. It's a waste of time to rely on some sort of… magic to just win games for you or make things happen!
QuicktoAnger: I guess so… sorry. Didn't realize I'd struck a nerve. Not many people are so sensitive to the word luck.
NotSuperstitious: Just don't say it, okay? It distracts me!
QuicktoAnger: Okay! Sheesh…
NotSuperstitious: …why don't we change the subject for now?
QuicktoAnger: That sounds good. So, did you hear about that kid from Rokkaku?
NotSuperstitious: No… what happened to him?
QuicktoAnger: Apparently he was IMing his Keyboard Pal when some guy broke into his house. The guy wasn't expecting there to be anyone home, so when he saw the Rokkaku kid, he panicked and pulled a gun on him.
NotSuperstitious: So what happened!
QuicktoAnger: Lucky for him, his Keyboard Pal was none other than Atobe Keigo, who had been trying to recruit the kid for some sort of Hyotei promo. When the kid started writing about this guy attacking him, Atobe decided to take action and called his personal police. They traced the IM, and two hours later, found the Rokkaku guy bound and gagged in the closet. He was totally fine, though he said afterwards that the guy had only gagged him because he "asked too many questions!"
NotSuperstitious: Lucky…
QuicktoAnger: Did you hear anything I said besides the word lucky?
NotSuperstitious: Luckyluckylucky…
QuicktoAnger: Sheesh… I don't know what you'd do if you ever met that Yamabuki kid, Sengoku Kiyosumi. Lucky's his favorite-
NotSuperstitious: AARGH! LUCKY! LUCKY! LUCKY! I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE!
QuicktoAnger: You need therapy.
NotSuperstitious: LUCKYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
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KnowMYName: I just wanted to thank you again.
YamaSurname: Oh?
KnowMYName: I spoke to my brother about the whole overbearing thing again, saying exactly what you told me to say, and this time he's really listened! I mean, even though I mentioned my manager yesterday, whom he really hates and never fails to mention it, he was great about it. Oh, his eyes hardened for a second, but then it was like he was remembering exactly what I had said to him and he kept quiet.
YamaSurname: Sounds like my advice is working. But it sounds like your brother is suffering.
KnowMYName: Suffering.
YamaSurname: Yes. From what I've…heard… he seems to really, earnestly care about you, but he must feel like you're pushing him away. He tries to be a caring, considerate older brother, and all he gets from you are declarations of your need to be independent.
KnowMYName: But that's what you told me to tell him!
YamaSurname: Maybe I was a bit harsh. It seems like your aniki means well, and doesn't understand why you don't think about it that way. He'd be heartbroken to know all the details that you've told me about how you feel.
KnowMYName: Yes, but if I start relying on him or something, he'll just take that as meaning that I do want him to be overprotective!
YamaSurname: Believe me, now that he knows how you feel, he won't be so quick to stifle you anymore.
KnowMYName: You don't know my brother!
IntellectuallyChallenged: 96.7 percent chance that "KnowMYName" is Fuji Yuuta.
GettingDumbAndDumber: An equal percent that YamaSurname is-
YamaSurname: Inui Sadaharu? Is that you? And probably Yanagi Renji, too?
KnowMYName: What are you two doing in our IM?
GettingDumbAndDumber: Gathering data, gathering data…
KnowMYName: Isn't this an invasion of privacy! You two get out!
Automated Response: GettingDumbAndDumber has signed offline.
Automated Response: IntellectuallyChallenged has signed offline.
KnowMYName: I can't believe those two were eavesdropping on our conversation!
YamaSurname: It sounds like their type of thing to do though, right?
KnowMYName: I guess, but it's still not right! Now you know my identity, too.
YamaSurname: I guessed it already, so it doesn't make a difference.
KnowMYName: You knew who I was all along? Who are you?
YamaSurname: You'll just have to wait until everyone else finds out…
KnowMYName: Aw, come on! Just a hint!
Automated Response: YamaSurname has signed offline.
KnowMYName: What's with him today…?
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TennisStarWannabe: I'm so excited that you're on again!
Nanisure: …
TennisStarWannabe: I wanted to ask you about the Cyclone Smash. Have you ever seen Echizen Ryoma do it?
Nanisure: …
TennisStarWannabe: I did- a few times, actually! I've been trying to use it, but I can't seem to jump that high. How would you say I should do it best?
Nanisure: …
TennisStarWannabe: Yeah, I guess you wouldn't know if you've never seen it! I'm sorry; I'll stop talking about tennis. You don't seem to like discussing it.
Nanisure: …
TennisStarWannabe: You know, it's funny. When we first started talking, I felt like I was doing all the talking. I was worried at first, but now it's amazing how well we get along! I really feel like I can talk to you, and I'm sure you also feel that way.
Nanisure: …
TennisStarWannabe: I'm glad! I'm happy that I can get along with someone who's probably a year or two older than I am, and who knows so much more tennis than I do! I love this program!
Nanisure: …
TennisStarWannabe: I've got to go now, but thank you for the conversation, as always. I can't wait to meet you!
TBC
(Two notes: First, I'm sorry that I haven't really been churning out the chapters so quickly. I've been caring for an injured cat for the past two-three weeks, and have been kind of distracted by that. But she's getting better now, so I should be putting out more chapters more often!
Second, I'm absolutely desperate to publish Coalition fanfiction, but doesn't have a book category for it! Could people please go to support. and request that Coalition, by Basi Lisker, be placed as a category on I would be eternally grateful!)
