See the stone set in your eyes See the thorn twist in your side I wait for you
Sleight of hand and twist of fate On a bed of nails she makes me wait And I wait without you
With or without you With or without you
Through the storm we reach the shore You give it all but I want more And I'm waiting for you
With or without you With or without you I can't live With or without you
And you give yourself away And you give yourself away And you give And you give And you give yourself away
My hands are tied My body bruised, she's got me with Nothing to win and Nothing left to lose
And you give yourself away And you give yourself away And you give And you give And you give yourself away
With or without you With or without you I can't live With or without you
With or without you With or without you I can't live With or without you With or without you
--With Or Without You by U2
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"I'm not listening," she said, covering her ears with her hands. "I'm not."
"Lily..."
"I don't want to hear it."
"It'll only be for a couple of days..."
"We were supposed to spend Christmas together...it's our last year at Hogwarts!"
"I got you a present..."
"That isn't enough! I want you to be here for me to kiss under the mistletoe."
"We both know you'd never kiss me."
"True," she said with a devilish smile, "but it's an awfully nice thought anyway."
He rolled his eyes.
"Admit it."
"Shut up."
"Why do you have to see your Mummy and Daddy anyway?"
"They said they miss me."
"They're lying."
"I know that, you know that, but they don't know I know it so they keep pretending."
"It's too bad we were stuck with terrible parents."
"Lucky we have each other though."
"Yes, it is."
"You're going to adore your present."
"You're going to adore yours too."
"God, what's on your arm?"
She quickly pulled the sleeve of her shirt down. "Nothing."
"Get in a fight with a dragon and lose?"
"Haha...yes."
"Wait."
"Look, Remus..."
"Malfoy did that to you."
"Why would he do that?"
"You've been going behind my back, haven't you? I told you he was bad news, Lily. I told you I didn't want you so much as talking to him in the corridors unless I was with you...or James or Sirius."
"As though you can save me!" She said, in a voice as bitter as it was cruel. "As though you can fix my whole life!"
"Let me see it."
"What?"
"The bruise."
"No, it's none of your business."
Still, she pulled up the sleeve of her shirt, revealing a purple bruise the size of a fist on her left shoulder. Gently, he kissed the bruise and pulled her sleeve back down.
"Keep this between me and you."
He took her face in his hands and met her eyes with a look of desperation and sadness that matched her own to perfection. "Don't do this to me," he whispered, "don't do this to me."
She parted her lips as he turned away from her, arms crossed over his chest.
"Don't you turn your back on me!" She said, pushing him against a tree that was so tall it looked as though it could touch the heavens. "Don't you ever turn your back on me!"
"You know what, Evans? If you wanted to break my heart, it's broken. You bragged about being a heartbreaker and you're right, you are a heartbreaker. But what you have is nothing compared to Lucius Malfoy's wit and skill, he will crush you. He'll crush you."
"Lucius Malfoy loves me."
"All Lucius Malfoy wants is your body and you know it. You don't even care anymore. You think you aren't aren't good enough for someone to really love you. You don't believe that someone could want you for so much more."
"You shouldn't talk about something you know nothing about."
"But that's the thing, Lily...I do know about it because I..."
"You know nothing about love except what you read in those books of yours. You know nothing about wanting someone so badly but being scared that they'll figure you out and leave you. Everyone in my life has left me. Why don't you leave me now, Remus? It'd be easier on both of us. Run away...run far far away."
"If you want to run, you run," his voice sounded like he was challenging her...daring her, and Lily Evans could never pass up on a dare.
So she did run. She ran as fast as her barefeet would take her and she ran in the neverending field for what seemed like hours. Then, she collapsed.
What she didn't see was Remus Lupin, breathless, running behind her. He collapsed right next to her, breathing hard and sweating. As soon as she looked to her side and saw her best friend, she began crying. Tears poured from her emerald eyes like rain from an angry God. She curled up in his lap as he held her. He could feel her body against his...shaking and scared. Her hand felt so small in his. He saw her eyelids close.
"Never leave me," she whispered in a sleepy haze.
"I love you," he whispered back, knowing she couldn't hear, "for six years I've loved you. When you marry James, I'll still love you."
She stirred, "I love you too," she said, and his mouth gaped open in suprise and embarassment that she could hear him. "I'm never going to marry James, only you...okay? Okay? I'm going back to sleep...never leave me..."
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