Obligation

By Mezzo-chan

She tells herself he doesn't do it by choice. She makes herself believe that he's obligated to do it.

And yet every time he goes, she's filled with doubt.

She doesn't let anyone know, but it happens anyway.

Her heart shudders and her teeth clench every time he announces he's going.

And she watches him from the tower windows as he leaves to see his other woman.

She tells herself she's pathetic, being jealous of a dead girl, especially one who died saving them.

And yet he purchases flowers, and makes the long journey down into the stone depths, and spends hours on end staring at a statue and talking.

Just talking.

Telling her about his life, his friends, and his battles. Things you normally tell the departed through prayer.

She wonders sometimes if he tells her about the two of them, what they've been doing since she left.

What else does he tell her down there? What secrets is he keeping from her? Why does he continue to visit? Does he think one day she will be there waiting for him?

That's what worries Raven the most. That one day he'll go down there and find the thing he's been missing.

And then he'll leave.

Then she tells herself that is stupid. He wouldn't just leave, would he? Not after everything. Not after what they'd shared.

But she wasn't pretty like Terra. And she wasn't athletic or funny or optimistic. In the end, which would he choose?

She had to know. Was it love or obligation? And for which girl?

"I'd like to go with you next time," she says to him that evening.

"Really?" he looks nervous, "Why?"

"It's just what I want to do," she states bluntly, gauging his reaction.

He looks at his feet guiltily, shuffles them a bit, sighs heavily.

"Alright,"

He was uncomfortable. He was regretting his decision.

Maybe she was intruding on something private, or maybe he didn't think she would like seeing Terra's grave, or maybe he'd just had a bad day.

There were so many options, and none of them left her satisfied.

He doesn't do it by choice, she tells herself secretly.

It's only obligation.

Author's Note:

I feel like I've touched on a lot of parts of BB and Raven's relationship, and Terra so far hasn't been one of them. I think that with love comes a heaping pile of doubt as well, and this seemed the best way to express it. Sorry it's not very happy, but then again something aren't. And thanks to everyone for all the reviews!

Up Next, Chapter 17: Inquiry