Part 21
To say I had good dreams would be an understatement. I woke up feeling giddy, a smile on my face when my eyes fell on the chamomile I had placed in a cup of water last night, sitting on my bedside table.
It was such a sweet gesture, and it made me feel warm and gooey inside.
I was definitely enjoying Dimitri courting me. If our lunch date went that well, I was even more excited for our date at the markets.
My skin was still tingling from the memory of his hands on mine. The intensity between us outside my door, I was so close to kissing him. I touched my fingertips to my lips; I could still remember what it felt like to kiss him; both the way he kissed me as a dhampir and as a Strigoi.
I wanted to feel his warm lips on mine again, when our kisses were sweet and passionate rather than rough and demanding.
Forcing myself to stop thinking about Dimitri, I climbed out of bed and got ready for my first day officially as Lissa's guardian. I know this may only be temporary, so I was determined to do my very best. I will prove to Hans that I should be kept on as Lissa's guardian after this.
I had told Dimitri that I wanted him around to provide backup, so I sent him a text asking if he would walk over with me. I know I could have just gone next door and asked, but there was still a small part of me that was unsure.
What if he had changed his mind and didn't want to be around me all day?
What if he was upset I didn't kiss him yesterday?
I chewed nervously on my thumbnail while waiting for a response. I didn't have to wait long.
Dimitri: I'll meet you there. I have to pick something up. I hope you slept well, Roza.
What are you getting? :Rose
Dimitri: It's a surprise.
Well, at least he was still coming. I felt anticipation as to what the surprise might be. I couldn't feel anything from the bond with him except for his contentment, closing it off again. I was getting better at blocking it, as I did with Lissa's, telling myself it wasn't fair for me to be digging around in his emotions when he can't do the same to mine.
With one last check of myself in the mirror. Straightening my uniform, guardian standard white shirt and black slacks and jacket, hair tied up and pinned out of my face. I looked like a real guardian, even had my silver stake in the holster around my hips.
I still carried the one I had staked Dimitri with; it served as a reminder to not hesitate and that I was willing to do what I needed. My fingers ran along the cool metal, so many memories were attached to it.
Dimitri is alive now. I reminded myself, Dimitri was alive. I had him back.
I had him back, and he loved me.
I schooled my features, putting on my guardian mask. This was it.
I arrived right at 7 pm, knocking at the front door. There were two guardians stationed outside the townhouse, both nodding at me in greeting. Sage Andrews, Lissa's primary guardian, had explained to me that because Eddie was already working as a near guard for Jill and with Mikhail staying there, Jill's additional guardians were given the job to patrol the outside of the house for anyone that may be trying to sneak in.
Mikhail was the one to answer the door, waving me in with a tired smile. Sage was in the kitchen, standing by the back window, able to keep an eye out the back window and watch Lissa as she and Christian ate their breakfast. A sleepy Jill sat with them at the kitchen table, Sonya next to her reading a book.
Eddie nodded at me, standing on guard by the kitchen doorway, keeping all of the entrances covered.
I greeted everyone, making my way to Sage, "Guardian Andrews."
"Guardian Hathaway, ready for your first day?" He smirked. We both knew that it would be an easy day with both Lissa and Jill required to stay inside. "Where's your other half?"
I ignored Lissa's giggle at his question, keeping my face blank, "Dimitri is picking up something and will be by shortly." Though we weren't officially together, it wouldn't take a rocket scientist to realise that he and I were closer. That and the fact we hadn't broken the bond; everyone just assumed that we were together.
With another flash of his crooked smirk, Sage went back into business mode, handing me my earpiece and radio. My job was simple enough; I follow Lissa and keep an eye on the immediate area. Sage would join the other guardians outside to do patrols of the area and then come back inside to check on things.
The threat, though low, was still very real for Lissa and Jill. Being the last two Dragomir's, Hans and Queen Tatiana weren't taking any chances.
I took up Sage's place by the window as he went out the front of the house to check in with the others. Lissa shot me looks of barely contained excitement; having me guarding her was a dream come true for us.
A small conversation filled the silence while they ate, Eddie and I occasionally joining in. Mikhail was sitting at the table with the Moroi, he wasn't on duty and was unofficially Sonya's personal guardian, but he still kept his eyes sharp.
I perked up when I heard Abe's name brought up in conversation, "What did Abe do?" I asked.
Jill was the one to respond, "He offered to have some of his guardians stay with my parents so they could stay in their suite. I think all of the council stuff is stressing out my mom. This way she can get away from it a little."
I was surprised Abe had done so but not completely shocked. I could feel Lissa's relief at having the house a little less full.
"Once things calm down, Emily will as well," Sonya comforted Jill, giving her a kind smile. It was the first time she had spoken since I arrived, closing her book to look around the room. Her eyes locked with mine, a smile slowly creeping over her face, "Rose, you are looking much better today. Very bright indeed."
Lissa looked up at me, too, squinting. Sonya had been teaching her more about reading auras; I felt myself drawn into her head as she examined mine. It really was bright, a combination of colours, but they were almost white, shining from me, though the edges were still shrouded in darkness. It was a little disconcerting just how much there was.
Suddenly the light of mine shone brighter, expanding as if reaching for something. I didn't need to read auras to know what that meant. I had been feeling the tingles along my skin; Dimitri was near.
Mikhail stood when there was another knock at the door, returning a moment later with Dimitri trailing behind him, carrying a pink box and cups of coffee. I stayed in Lissa's mind, watching as her eyes moved to Dimitri. As soon as he looked in my direction, his aura shined, reaching towards mine.
I quickly pulled back from Lissa's mind, finding Sonya watching me with a knowing smile. It really was like the sun; it was almost blinding.
"Good morning, Rose."
I snapped my eyes to Dimitri's, gazing at me with affection, in his hand a cup of coffee offered to me. My hand moved automatically to take it from him. With a twitch of his lips, he turned back to the room. It wasn't until I looked down at the cup that I realised he had also given me another chamomile.
I held the flower between my fingers, looking at the small white petals with a shy smile, glad that no one was looking my way as a slight blush tinted my cheeks. I took a sip of my coffee, aware that the warmth I felt flooding my body wasn't due to the hot beverage.
Lissa appeared beside me. Without saying a word, she took the flower from my hand and slid it into my bun, speaking to me through the bond. You two are so cute. You have to tell me everything that happened yesterday!
"Later," I muttered under my breath, scowling as she projected the sight of the flower tucked in my hair through the bond. I wasn't going to admit to her how much I loved the small token; there was a satisfaction in wearing something Dimitri had given me.
"You better hide those before Rose eats them all," Eddie teased from across the room, staring at Dimitri as he opened the pink box he brought with him.
I tilted my head until I could see what was inside, a selection of doughnuts. My feet carried me over as my stomach growled at the sight.
Dimitri chuckled, "I figured you forgot to eat. Like the surprise?" His eyes noticed the flower, love and happiness radiating from him.
I reached into the box, taking one of the doughnuts. I may have moaned as I ate it. "This is the best kind of surprise."
Sage was at Dimitri's other side, taking a couple of doughnuts, "Keep bringing these, and you can come by anytime."
I watched Sage head back outside, no doubt to share with the guardians. I elbowed Dimitri playfully, "Are you buying people's favour with food?"
He shot me a smirk, quickly schooling his face to appear innocent, "I'm just helping keep everyone awake and fed while they protect their charges."
"Yeah, he's just being thoughtful, Hathaway," Eddie commented, a doughnut in each hand, "Let the man do what he wants."
Narrowing my eyes, I took the chocolate glaze from Eddie's hand, smirking at the sour look he shot me. "Thanks, comrade."
As I walked away from Dimitri, I may have put a bit more sway into my hips than needed, feeling his eyes follow me as I left the kitchen to the loungeroom where Lissa was now setting up. I dropped down on the couch beside her, eyes scanning the pieces of paper she had laid out.
"Is this all for your speech?" I asked. They were printed pages of a speech with scribbles and edits written all over them in red pen.
Lissa frowned, "Yeah, I can't decide what I want to say. And then I also want to be prepared to make my first motion," Her eyes flicked to where Dimitri and Sonya were sitting together at the kitchen table. "But everything I write just sounds terrible."
I did not envy Lissa; I've always been better at using my fists rather than words to get the point across to someone. "Why don't you just wing it."
"Rose," Her wide eyes landed on mine, "I can't just wing it. This is the Royal Council. I'm going to be a part of the Council." Her eyes moved back to the papers before her, "I'm going to be a part of the Council tomorrow…."
I could feel the start of a panic attack building in Lissa, her emotions swirling dangerously. I bit my lip, knowing what I could do to help, fighting with myself as I felt the overwhelming urge to take the darkness from her.
Just as I was opening myself up to accept it, Christian came down the stairs and was instantly at her side.
He placed both hands on Lissa's face, angling her to look at him, "Breath. Everything is going to be fine."
I placed my hand on Lissa's back, knowing that it helped to comfort her, "Christian's right. You're going to be amazing." Christian gave me a thankful look before returning his attention to Lissa. Her breathing had calmed down as she relaxed; I kept rubbing her back while Christian sent soothing emotions through their bond. "Christian and I will both be there tomorrow, the whole time. You won't be doing this alone."
"You're right. I can do this," Lissa affirmed, feeling her confidence return.
Lissa prided herself on appearing strong to others, especially here at Court. The Royals became like sharks if they smelled any weakness. It was only around us she truly let her fears show. I was grateful to Christian and their bond, how quickly he could calm the emotions rising within her.
I felt through our bond to see if the darkness had receded back. It wasn't as close to the surface anymore, but it had been over a week since I had taken any from her, and I could see it building. I should take a little, just enough to take the edge off so she could focus on preparing herself for tomorrow. I have my bracelet; I would be fine.
Just a little…
"Rose."
My eyes snapped to Dimitri's; he was standing beside me, hand on my shoulder. I hadn't even noticed him coming over. His face was blank, but his eyes held a warning and apprehension. Dimitri knew what I was about to do.
I don't know how he knew, but it was obvious that he didn't want me doing it.
He tilted his head to the side, silently asking me to speak to him. I glanced at Lissa; she focused on Christian, explaining her speech to him. I followed Dimitri to the side of the room, far enough away to not be overheard, but kept Lissa in my sights.
"I know you want to help, but you can't take anymore," He started, eyes holding mine.
"But I can help. She won't be freaking out as much if I just take a little. I'll be fine."
"You don't know that. You are wearing multiple charms to help keep what you have already taken from affecting you," His eyes pinched in the corners, "I don't want to see that happen to you again."
I felt his fear for me spike, memories of when I was almost lost to the darkness returning. I didn't want that to happen to me again either, how it felt losing myself to the madness. But to not do something to help Lissa felt worse.
Dimitri's fingers wrapped around mine, squeezing, "Please, Roza."
I stared into his eyes, they were pleading me, and I couldn't deny him. With a sigh, I conceded, "Okay, I won't take any." Relief flooded the bond, the stress on his face easing.
"Thank you," He whispered, stepping away from me, his fingers slipping away from mine, and I was left missing the feel of him.
"How was that?"
I blinked at Lissa. Honestly, I had stopped listening after she repeated her speech the fourth time, not realising that she had gone through it again until she was looking at me intently. "That was great, the best one yet." I lied through my teeth, adding a smile to sell it.
She crossed her arms, "That's what you said last time."
"Umm… This time I mean it."
"Rose," She pouted, "You aren't even listening, are you? This is important!"
I put my hands up in surrender, "I'm sorry, you know I don't know much about this kind of stuff. I already think it sounded great the first time."
"Why don't you ask Tasha to come around and look at it?" Christian offered.
Both of us whipped around to stare at him. We had moved from the loungeroom to Lissa's room. Lissa had been pacing back and forth, reciting her speech while I watched from a chair by her bedroom door, so I could be quick to act if needed. Christian was lounging on the bed on his phone.
Lissa shot me a look. Christian suspected something, but Lissa never confirmed to him about Tasha's feelings for Dimitri. Lissa was hesitant to invite her over with both Dimitri and I here. While I didn't like how Tasha would blatantly throw herself at Dimitri in front of me, things had changed between us since we last saw her.
I shrugged at Lissa, "She does know more about this stuff. She could help," As reluctant as I was to admit it, Tasha understood the politics of the Moroi world.
Half an hour later, we were down in the kitchen again, Lissa and Tasha going over the speech while I watched from the kitchen counter. Dimitri had been pulled into the conversation at some point, though I was pleased to see him sitting on the opposite side, and Tasha kept her hands to herself.
Dimitri's eyes would find mine occasionally, a burst of affection each time. Part of me wished that Tasha could feel how much he loved me. Just imagining the look on her face made me smirk, having to bite back my laughter.
Suddenly Dimitri stopped talking mid-sentence, eyes snapping to mine in surprise. He was out of his chair and in front of me in a couple of steps.
I quirked an eyebrow at him, "What's up, comrade?"
Dimitri's hand lightly gripped my shoulders, "What… Rose, were you thinking of something funny?"
My mouth went dry.
Did I say something out loud?
How did Dimitri know that I…
My mind could scarcely believe what that meant, telling myself there must be some other reason.
"What?" I finally asked. I tried to calm my beating heart, anticipation and hope rising inside me. Dimitri didn't reply; instead, he closed his eyes. I felt determination from him and other emotions similar to mine.
But then, I felt something else.
It was calming.
It felt almost like a blanket, the way it settled around me, slowly flowing from my chest and to my limbs. It was warm and loving and like nothing I had ever experienced before. All the tension I had been holding in my body from being around Tasha, and my worries about Lissa fell away. It was like waves of calm washing over me.
And it felt like Dimitri.
I hadn't even realised my eyes had closed as I savoured the feeling. Everything about it felt so inviting and perfect.
When I opened my eyes, I found him staring back at me in shock and awe, and then I understood what I had just felt. Dimitri was sending emotions through the bond to me, just as I had sent them to him to help calm him.
Dimitri was using the bond.
I couldn't form any words. I couldn't even move or take my eyes off of Dimitri's.
Dimitri was using the bond, and I was feeling it. Tears filled my eyes, threatening to fall as I became overwhelmed by what this meant.
And then, as suddenly as it had come, it was gone.
I couldn't keep the disappointment off my face from having lost the connection; it left me feeling cold. The look of confusion and then frustration showed on his.
"What?" I took a breath, gathering my thoughts, "What just happened?"
"I could feel it… but then -" He released my shoulders, curling his hands into fists, his eyebrows furrowed in anger. "Dammit."
Before I could say anything else, Dimitri stalked out of the room. My heart aching when I heard the front door slam. Despite how much I wanted to go after him, I couldn't. I was still on shift for another three hours.
"Rose, what was that?" Lissa asked tentatively, her hand coming to rest on my shoulder where Dimitri's had been.
I shook my head, blinking back the tears, "I don't know."
