Sorry for any mistakes, I didn't do the usual read through before posting. My husband was kind enough to give me his cold/flu thing so I'm just a bit under the weather. Next update will probably be the day after tomorrow.

Hope you enjoy this one, a little bit of fluffy for you :)

Part 24

Laying on my back, I stared up at the ceiling. Sleep has eluded me. My mind wouldn't stop jumping from thought to thought.

The Moroi that attacked us was dead, a convenient suicide note left beside him taking the blame for everything and that he worked alone.

Dimitri had given up his position as Lissa's guardian so that we could be together.

Adrian thinks that I was the one blocking the bond.

My mind kept looping back to that last one.

My body felt tense, muscles pulled taut, feeling restless. The darkness I had taken from Lissa was simmering under the surface, begging for an outlet. At first, just thinking about Dimitri, reaching out to him through the bond to feel the peace he had when sleeping, had helped.

Since his nightmare the other night, I would send calming feelings through the bond to help him drift off to sleep, hoping it was enough to hold the nightmares at bay. Doing so tonight had drained me more than I had expected, and yet I couldn't find any rest of my own.

Rolling off my bed, I gave up on the thought of achieving sleep. I needed to work this energy out of me; otherwise, I wouldn't be focused when guarding Lissa. Everyone else may be okay lowering their guard, but I wasn't.

I changed and grabbed my gym bag; the gym was the best way to clear my mind.


The gym was practically empty, only a few guardians working out at this time of night, the sun still high in the sky. I hadn't been here since the last time the darkness became too much. Hopefully, this time I can work it out without being approached.

I stored my bag and then climbed upstairs to the running track; after a few stretches, I took off at a fast pace.

I pushed thoughts of the Moroi from my mind; I needed more information about how he was found before I spent hours trying to make sense of it. Instead, my thoughts drifted to Dimitri and the bond.

"... you are blocking your side from getting through to him."

I had been so sure this whole time that Dimitri was blocking it. I had been feeling the soulmate bond between us since he was restored. Feeling each sharp pain from when he tore it with his words, almost destroying it.

Even when he touched me, I felt the overwhelming feeling of it all.

How could I possibly be blocking it?

Sonya had even said that something was blocking the connection between us… but she had never said it was Dimitri.

Surely, she would have said something if she knew it was me.

Wouldn't she?

Adrian had sounded so sure that it was me, but I didn't question how he could tell exactly, becoming distracted by the other information he decided to share with me.

But if he was right and it was because of me, I needed to know why and how to get rid of it. And only two people could tell me that for sure. I couldn't go ask Adrian, sure he may have been civil today, but I didn't need to go to my ex to ask about my soulmate.

I would have to ask Sonya.

I kept running until the muscles in my legs were screaming, my lungs constricting with each breath I took. Despite how tired my limbs felt, it was still there, the dark feeling churning within me. I wasn't sure why it was stronger now.

Part of me wished I had stayed the night with Dimitri or had just gone to him. There was no denying the effect he had in keeping the darkness back. After our kiss last night, it felt like I was floating. I hadn't felt that light in a long time, and I craved that again.

Coming back down to the main floor, I realised how long I had been running; people were starting to arrive at the gym, getting an early workout in before their shifts. Glancing at the clock, I still had five hours before I was expected at Lissa's.

I needed to gain control still; running hadn't worked, maybe punching something did.


Sweat was dripping down my back, running between my shoulder blades. I kept throwing punches at the swinging bag before me. At first, my focus was being thrown off hearing whispering from others around me. I don't know if it was me they were talking about, but the darker emotions in me were sure they were.

I had put in my earphones and blasted music to drown them out. Becoming so lost to the motion of punching that everyone else faded away.

I became so focused that when someone placed a hand on my shoulder, my body moved automatically. I spun on my heel, fist already flying through the air to hit the person. My fist connected with flesh, and my body froze, realising what I had just done.

There standing before me, holding my fist in theirs, was Dimitri. Part of me was instantly ecstatic to see him; the other part was mortified that I had just tried to punch him.

I ripped my earphones out, "Shit! Why are you sneaking up on me?" I demanded.

Dimitri raised an eyebrow, "I've been calling your name. Why aren't you paying attention to your surroundings?" His voice was so similar to when he would scold me during training. Even the expression he was giving me was the same.

I rolled my eyes, "I was focused, okay." I went to turn away only to realise his hand was still holding mine; my eyes travelled back to his with a smirk. "If you wanted to hold my hand, comrade, you just had to ask."

The corner of his lips twitched, glancing at the few guardians that stopped to watch our interaction. With Dimitri eyeing them, they were quick to look elsewhere. Dimitri released my hand; I missed the contact straight away.

"Why are you here so early?" He asked, eyes flicking from the punching bag and then back to me; slowly, they moved over my body. I doubted I looked too great; I could feel the layer of sweat coating me. My limbs had moved from tired to exhausted and sore.

"I couldn't sleep."

His eyes narrowed, hand reaching for mine again; this time, he clasped it with both hands, nimble fingers unwrapped my knuckles in a quick motion. I felt his annoyance spike as he examined my red and swollen knuckles.

"How long have you been here?" He grabbed my other hand, also unwrapping it and cursing under his breath.

I shrugged, not even sure what time it was now, "A couple of hours maybe."

"Rose," Dimitri's voice dropped in tone, disapproving. His eyes hardened, "This is because of what you took from Lissa, isn't it?"

I didn't answer him, dropping my eyes from his.

With his hold on me, Dimitri led me away from the gym equipment and to one of the back rooms. It was stocked with first aid gear, even having a small cot in case anyone needed to lay down. Dimitri pushed on my shoulders until I sat in one of the chairs along the wall. Turning to the fridge and digging out some ice packs.

"Why didn't you tell me? You said it wasn't affecting you last night." Facing me again, Dimitri grabbed a second chair and dragged it over to be in front of me. I was having some serious flashbacks to training at the academy.

The familiarity of it made warmth spread through me. I watched silently as Dimitri picked up my hands, setting them on his knees that were braced on either side of mine, laying an ice pack over each. He was so close, his body heat and scent filling my senses until it was all I could think of.

Dimitri dipped his head, catching my eyes, staring at me expectantly.

"It wasn't before, but then it started getting hard to ignore."

"You could have come to me," Dimitri kept his voice level, but I felt a hint of hurt through the bond. He was also aware that he helped me with the darkness and had expected me to come to him for help. The fact I didn't upset him.

I bit my lip, "You were sleeping. I didn't want to bother you."

"Roza, coming to me when you have a problem will never bother me," He told me, imploring me with his eyes to see he was serious.

"How did you know I was here?" I asked, changing the subject. My stomach was fluttering from his words.

"I just knew. I woke up and knew there was something wrong, and I came here."

It wasn't much of an explanation, but I instantly understood. It was like how I could find him in the church; the bond led me there. Without doing so on purpose, Dimitri had followed it here to me.

We remained silent for a couple of minutes, Dimitri holding the ice packs to my knuckles. Glancing at the clock, he lifted them to inspect my hands. "If we go back now, you could still get some sleep before your shift starts."

"I don't think I'm going to be able to sleep," I replied honestly. The darkness wasn't pressing against me anymore, but my mind was still wired.

Dimitri's eyes flicked to mine, "Humour me."

And so I did, following him back to the dorms and then to my room, I excused myself for a quick shower so I didn't smell like sweat still. Exiting the bathroom, I found Dimitri sitting on the edge of my bed, looking at my side table. The two flowers he had gifted me sat in a glass of water, and behind that was a framed photo of Dimitri's family. It was part of the photos Viktoria had sent me, an older family photo taken before Dimitri had left for America.

I had grown so fond of his family when I was there, remembering seeing this photo at the house when staying there. When I saw it in the collection attached to the email, I printed an extra copy for myself.

"You should call them, you know."

Dimitri jumped slightly at the sound of my voice, distracted by the photo. He didn't turn to face me, emotions jumping between guilt and anxiety. "I wouldn't even know what to say to them."

I crawled on the bed until I was beside him, "I'm no expert, but I'm pretty sure hello is a great place to start."

He shot me a look, half exasperated, half amused. "How helpful."

I laughed softly, taking pride in the smile I brought to his face, even though it didn't reach his eyes. I nudged him with my shoulder, "If you need backup when you call, I'm happy to be there as moral support." I sobered, "You're a free man again, Dimitri, the news of it will reach them soon enough, and they should hear about it from you first."

A long sigh escaped him before he nodded, "Soon."

Knowing that was all he was going to say on the topic, I shifted on the bed until I was sitting against my pillow, "I'm not going to be able to sleep, comrade. There are only two hours before I have to get up. It's not even worth it."

"Any sleep is better than none, trust me, Roza," He insisted, eyeing me until I laid down, "Just try."

Dimitri also shifted around until he was next to me, making me raise my eyebrows, "You're staying?"

"Yep. If I don't, you will just get up. Now close your eyes." He ordered, pulling out a novel that I hadn't realised he had brought in with him, must have grabbed it while I was showering. There was enough sunlight coming in through my window for him to read still.

I grumbled but did as he said, despite knowing it was a waste of time. There was no way I would be able to sleep, but as he said, I was humouring him.


"Roza," His soft voice enveloped me. Feeling his fingertips grazing the skin of my shoulder, travelling down my arm until his finger intertwined with mine. Waking up next to Dimitri was addictive.

There were so many days that I had woken up with just the grief, the knowledge that I had lost the man I loved. But here he was, his feelings of love flowing from the bond; it was perfect. I wished that was how I woke up every day.

I cracked my eyes open, finding his brown eyes fondly watching me, a smile pulling at the corners of his lips. "Morning."

I stretched, taking joy feeling his body brushing against mine. "What's the time?"

"Not long after six."

I blinked in shock; I had been expecting that I may have achieved half an hour of sleep at most, not two hours. I rolled my head to face him, a knowing smirk on his face.

"I told you," He teased.

I shot him a glare, sitting up to crack my back. Dimitri was right about some sleep being better than none. I felt great. I wondered how much of that was because of sleeping and how much was because of being close to him.

I reached over and poked him in the side, "You let me sleep in."

He shrugged unapologetically, "I didn't want to wake you."

I grinned at him, "Wow. Where did my hardass of a mentor go? If I overslept before training, you would have had me run ten laps for each minute I was late."

Dimitri scoffed, "That was different." A grin worked its way onto his face.

"Was it now?"

"Each minute you were late was less time for me to spend with you," Dimitri admitted to me in a low voice, his eyes darkening as his feelings for me became more intense. My breath hitched. The close proximity of our bodies was suddenly at the forefront of my mind, my body leaning in closer to his.

"Is that right? You enjoyed having me to yourself?" My tongue darted out to lick my lips that had suddenly become very dry.

His eyes followed the movement, flicking back up to my eyes, "Very much, Roza."

We both moved at the same time, lips meeting in the middle. At first, it was a tame kiss of our lips pressed against one another, but then his started to move against mine, and I became lost to the sensation. It was our second kiss shared with the bond, and the feeling left me light-headed and giddy.

I was distantly aware that I needed to get ready, but then his hand found purchase in my hair, and I became lost again. At this moment, nothing was more important to me than Dimitri.


I was running across the grounds of Court, cursing Dimitri's name. Our little makeout session, while amazing, had lasted longer than it should have, and I had to scramble to make it to Lissa's on time. This was still my first week guarding her, and I didn't need to be showing up late.

I can't imagine Hans would take kindly to the excuse that making out with Dimitri was just too good to stop. It took every ounce of control for us to step away from one another. Even now, I was still feeling the rush from it, a stupid smile on my face that wouldn't go away no matter how much I tried.

Dimitri had given me a look that was much too smug as I barreled out my dorm room, frantically arranging my hair into a bun and yelling at him to lock my door after him.

Lucky for him, I managed to make it to the front door, knocking to alert the guardian on duty of my arrival, stepping through the door at exactly 7 pm. I schooled my features and calmed my breathing so that it wasn't obvious I had run the whole way here.

With a brief update of an eventless night, Guardian Sables had left, leaving me alone downstairs, Lissa and Christian yet to rise. I did a quick once over of the house, checking both the front and the back before heading to the kitchen, reminding myself to hug Lissa for buying a coffee machine.

Sage had messaged me earlier saying he had worked to take care of a Guardian Headquarters for Lissa's trip and would be joining me later in the day. So it was just me moving about the house until Lissa made her way down the stairs half an hour after I arrived, Christian trailing after her looking dead to the world.

Lissa faltered at the kitchen entryway, squeezing her eyes shut, "Rose, you are too bright for this early in the morning."

I paused mid-sip, taking a second to realise Lissa was talking about my aura. It must be extra bright today after kissing Dimitri. I hid my smile behind my cup.

Christian beelined for the coffee machine, making his own cup.

"Good morning to you too," I greeted them. Lissa blinked a few times before coming closer, sitting at the kitchen island. "Where's Jill?"

Lissa lazily waved towards the stairs, her sky blue nails obvious against her pale skin. I was thankful that they had painted my nails a dusty pink, so they didn't stand out too much on me.

"She's still sleeping," Lissa explained with a yawn.

"And how late did you two stay up?" Here I was thinking I was the only one not sleeping.

Christian groaned behind me, "Too fucking late," He grumbled, lifting his cup to his lip to take a large sip from it.

I laughed, grinning at Lissa, "So you two had fun after I left?"

A soft smile settled on Lissa's face, "Yeah. It was nice."

Well, it seems that they did bond last night, which I was hoping but I had my doubts about it actually happening.

"What put you in such a good mood?" Lissa asked, though, from the way she looked at me, I knew she could guess from my aura.

I kept my face blank, once again thankful that Lissa was unable to read my thoughts, "I just had a good sleep." I didn't want to delve too much into it just yet. Lissa looking at my aura reminded me that I needed to ask Sonya about the bond and if what Adrian said was true. If it was, I wanted to know why she had never said anything before now.

I also considered asking Lissa about it but wanted the conversation to be private.

Granted not much was private with her bond with Christian. Each day I could feel their connection growing stronger; it was hard not to be jealous of them.

It was nice that he could help calm Lissa and her darkness, just as Dimitri could to me, but after being the one to do it for so long, it was hard to accept she didn't need me as much. If I hadn't become her guardian, I wondered if I would have been left behind when I was no longer required to help her with managing spirit.

I quickly stopped that line of thinking, pushing the thought deep down where they would never see the light of day. Luckily, Lissa was focused on Christian and didn't notice anything in my aura. Finishing my coffee, I let my mind slip into guardian mode; all of my thoughts were cut off. Now my focus was entirely on Lissa.

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