CHAPTER 7:

I took the letter and ring inside, and then sat down on my soft green bedspread, thinking about what I had just read. It was a perfectly plausible reason, and I would have accepted it without question, if only he had told me. I could also understand why he hadn't told me. Gray was never the most forward person, unless of course, he was arguing with Cliff. His blue eyes were shy and questioning, his face seemed to show no emotion, unless the eye was trained to find it.

On the other hand, I hadn't even given the guy a chance. I took the drama and ran with it, pulling a long thread of confusion and pain behind me, winding everyone up in the sticky string. Sure, he was wrong, but so was I! I had just as much a share in the blame as he did, and now, I had to do something about it.

As these thoughts were spinning, I stood up and looked at my clock. It was 8:24 am, but the blacksmiths wouldn't be open today, it being the Stocking Festival. He would be at the Inn, which meant I would have to risk seeing Ann, Cliff, Karen, Saibara, or even Mary, before reaching Gray. I knew that he wasn't the type of person to be in the dining room, having a wonderful time, because he would be upstairs, sitting in his little chair in the corner, arms folded, and a distressed but thoughtful look upon his sweet face.

This was too much for me, so I ran to the door, without brushing my hair, grabbing my backpack, or even a coat! I wasn't thinking too clearly, as is perfectly obvious. I quickly checked on the animals, just in case I was there longer than I thought.

The wet street looked longer, the air colder, and the town less friendly than it ever had before. I shook the doubts out of my mind, and walked briskly towards the Inn. Lillia was outside, in the yard of the Poultry Farm, wearing a shawl, and waved at me. I waved back, somewhat distractedly, and continued my path. The cobblestones on the street seemed to be trying to slow me down, and every step I took felt like I slid back three. Despite the best efforts, though, I arrived at the Inn's front door, ran my hand over the smooth, time-faded wood, and pushed it open.

My predictions were correct, and the dining room was packed, but Gray was absent, probably up in his room. Mary was sitting at a table with her parents, and cast a very appraising look at me. She must have realized why I was there, because her face grew red, and she looked down at her plate very quickly.

Saibara was also there, and when he saw me, his bushy eyebrows contracted for a moment, but he suddenly smiled an encouraging smile, which I returned, and started towards the stairs, amidst the curious stares of the diners.

I reached the stairs, walked slowly up them, wincing at every little sound, and feeling like I was headed towards a dark wood, shadowed, where you are unsure what is hidden behind every tree, and where, if you took the wrong path, you could end up hopelessly lost, and wither away.

I walked to Ann's room, tapped as soft as I could, and she opened the door, excitedly. I immediately put my finger to my lips and nodded, jerking my head towards Gray's room. She smiled, and nodded at me, her face shining with satisfaction. She reached out, grabbed my sweaty hand, and gave it a squeeze, then retreated back into her room, braid swinging.

I walked to the door of Gray's room, and thought to myself, Alright, Claire, here you are. You're going to go in and apologize. Don't cry now. Just be natural. Natural, with no tears. That's right. Natural, now. I closed my eyes, bobbed my head, smoothed down my front, shook my shining hair over my shoulders, and timidly knocked on the door, every knock resounding inside of my chest, hitting my heart.

Movement rustled inside the room, and Cliff's voice told Gray that he would answer the door. The door opens, and I suddenly feel extremely awkward, just standing there, in the doorway, looking for Gray. My eyes find him in his corner chair, just like I thought, his tan suit rumpled. Cliff lifts his eyebrows, and Gray shoots up out of his chair, eyes wide, a small coloring coming to his cheeks at the sight of such a pale, penitent figure standing in front of the room. He shoots a look at Cliff, who accepts the message, and excuses himself from the room, closing the door, after I have stepped inside.

We stand, both looking at each other, for a few moments, then, despite the fiercest of inner struggles, a tear runs down my cheek, as my gaze falls on the beautiful ring that Gray made with his own two hands. Gray's mouth opens slightly, and, his hands twitch slightly, as if about to reach for something. Suddenly, as if propelled by a sudden shove, my body is in motion, and I find myself in his arms.

Gray looks as surprised as I felt, but adapts quickly, holding me close, and laying his head on the side of mine, as I silently cried on his shoulder. His strong hand patted my back, I put my arms around his neck, and we stood like this for a long time. I could hear his heart beat, fast and choppy at first, but it slowly evened out as he held me, until it was a steady lub-dub, lub-dub, lub-dub, lub-dub. The wall inside of me crumbled completely, leaving me open to this new feeling of exhilaration, matched with peace.

We broke apart finally, and when I looked at his face, there was no sign of a blush. He sat down on his chair again, and I sat on a stool, facing him.

"Gray," I began, "How can I ever say that I'm sorry. I…was….a complete self-centered brat, and I really don't deserve your ….attentions. I really don't"

Gray looked like he was being electrified, and slowly replied, "Claire, it was my fault! I should have told you, but I didn't. Please don't apologize!"

I sniffed and told him, "No, it was both of our faults. Yes, you were wrong, but I had no right to ignore you and treat you badly. I should have talked to you. I do need your forgiveness."

He smiled gently and said, "Well, alright, if you'll do the same for me."

I looked into his amazingly deep blue eyes and softly ventured, "I already did."

He grabbed my hand, and we just held it like that, until the door was knocked upon by Cliff, who really needed something out of his bag. We stood up, I turned to go, but Gray pulled me in one last time, sealing the forgiveness with one last hug, and a bashful kiss on my cheek, the way lovers have always finished it, and always will.

I left, after sending him a smile, and quickly located Ann, pulled her into the back room, and told her of all that had happened. She rolled her eyes and exclaimed, "Well, didn't I tell you that? The more people listen to me, the better." I laughed, truly happy for the first time in weeks, and walked out through the now staring diners, into the road. I ran up past the blacksmith's, past my farm, and past Gotz's until I reached the top of Mother's Hill, where I dropped to my knees on the rough, cold rock, and screamed out, "YES! YES, YES, YES!" I sat and laughed until it was quite dark, and my nose was frozen, and then turned to go home and make dinner, which I would be far too ecstatic to eat.