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Tommy's My Guy 21

Kimberlli

IntoYou14: Jay is her boyfriend. He met her when she first moved there. She and him have been growing closer.

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Disclaimer: I don't own Instant Star, or The IS Cast. I own Jay, Keith, and Dylan (Who play a small part in the story).

This font is Jude's inner voice, whom she argues with... alot. That's the only font change.

On with the story!

Begin Chapter Three

"Look… It started out with a bad decision. You see, I've been in Montana, the past… 4 years. I came back to find you gone, and G-Major in a wreck, and then I started my solo career. And that's what happened."

"What were you doing in Montana, Tommy?"

He started to get nervous. I could tell. "During Boyz Attack, Chaz made a mistake. One night Chaz and this groupie went too far."

"Nothing unusual about that."

"Yea but they forgot an important thing."

"What?"

"Protection. They were too far into the moment, and they forgot about it. So…"

"Tommy, no…"

"Jude, look, I left for the Mom and Chaz had just died. They were killed in a car accident. There was no one else Jude. You have to understand, that I would never leave you. I had to, for that little girl who had no one to love her. You need to understand. I can't have you not understanding."

"You could've at least explained to me why you left Tommy! Not that shitty goodbye you gave me."

Flashback

"Hey, I didn't think you were gonna show."

"Jude… I have to go. And I don't think I'll be coming back."

"Tom? Sit, talk to me." I patted the seat across from me.

"I have a plane to catch." He shrugs sheepishly. "Bye." He said not really caring about me, at least I couldn't tell from the tone of his voice. He walks out of the restaurant. I leave money on the table and follow him. He gets in his car. Banging on the passenger's seat window where there is a creepy bald guy, giving me a weird look.

"Tom? Tom? Tommy?"

Banging on the back of the car as he pulls out of his parking spot.

"Tommy?" Screaming his name while he speeds away.

"TOMMY!"

End Flashback

"Jude, look I'm sorry. I know the mistake that I made, I can't take it back. But can't you at least believe me that I never wanted to leave you. You never left my mind when I was gone. Your voice sang songs in my head, and it made me live. Knowing that one day, I would see you again. You have to believe me Jude! Believe me when I say I love you with all of my heart. Always. I did before, I do now, and I always will. Please. You have to believe me. I don't think my heart could take it if I spent another second without knowing that you could somehow love me back. A sliver of hope, a sliver of knowing that you could try to forgive me. Jude, by now, I'll take anything you have to give."

Holy shit, he was in love with me!

Jude! Are you just going to let him back in! After all that he put you through? Do you remember that few months after he left? How pathetic you were? All those songs? All the heart-break...

But I still love him…

Jude! Don't think that way! You have to dislike him! It's been 4 years! Not one phone call, e-mail, or letter! Are you just going to take that?

Not entirely. I mean to make him work for my forgiveness. He won't get it back that easily.

But you're still giving him the chance to get it back! If you let yourself fall for him again… Do you want to feel the pain again, Jude? Of your heart shattering into a million pieces? Do you want to let yourself go through that again? You're 21, almost 22, you have a boyfriend who you truly care about! And now you're going to give it up!

Yes… I am.

Jude! Listen to m-

"I can try Tommy."

Damn you…

"Really Jude?"

"It'll take more than a confession, more than a song, more than a long time. But there is a chance you could get that trust back. A slight chance."

"Jude… I know this will put you over the edge, but I need to ask, and please answer me honestly. Jude, do you love me?"

Jude, don't answer that. If you answer that I'l-

"I'm not sure." Liar. "Tommy, I can't answer that right now. What kind of answer were you expecting? 4 years, then two meetings? That isn't enough time…" Yea it is…

"Jude, one more question. Did you love me, before I left?"

It's a 3rd degree interrogation…

"…" I look away. I wouldn't let him see the pain, or the tears in my eyes.

"Jude?"

"Leave."

"Jude? Wha-"

"Get out Quincy."

"Jude? I'm sor-"

"Get the hell out of my house!" Tommy stands up, and turns away from me.

I walk towards my room. Why does he make me feel like this?

It's because you let him get to you.

But I try to ignore him. But he just keeps coming back.

You just need to build a wall around your heart.

But I can't. I've tried. It works… Until I look into those blue eyes of his. Like a stormy sea… I can't help it.

Then let him in, and see what happens.

Aren't you supposed to know? And keep me from pain?

Hello? Are you there?

I guess not.

I walk out into the living room, to grab my new acoustic guitar. There's a note on it.

Dear Jude,

I'm sorry if I made you upset, I just really needed to know. I'm really sorry. And I was wondering if you would like to come on tour with me? It'll be fun, promise! And maybe, I could get you into singing for the beginning of each show? It would be just like old times… At least think about it. We leave in 2 days. Come to the Holiday Inn, on Orchard Road. I'll be waiting.

Love you,

Tommy

Oh my god…

I can't do this… I can't… Not now…

And singing… I was gonna start doing that again anyways…

I'll have to think long and hard about this…

I grab my guitar, and head back to my room. I grab my new journal from my bedside table, and sit on my bed, ready to start again doing what I love.

It was time for me to lose myself in the music again.

TJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJ

It took only about an hour for the words to come. An hour to write the music. An hour to get this song right. This song needed to be right. I needed it to be right. I couldn't stand the thought that if the song came out wring, how it would make me look… This was a song about the way I felt when Tommy left. The way I felt when he didn't care enough to call, to write, to send any kind of communication at all! I want him to feel my pain. I need him to feel my pain. He needs to know why I can't answer that first question yet. I guess he'll find out soon enough. Now… To go and buy clothes for the tour. No, I don't need new clothes for the tour. I had clothes… Yea…

TJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJ

I had everything packed and ready to go. I just needed to break things off with Jay. The hardest part of the whole fiasco I was letting myself be dragged into. I get in my car, and drive towards Jay's house. It's only like a half hour away. It's a small little townhouse, with a small backyard. It was white, and had a tanish garage door. I park the car in his driveway, and I walk up the sidewalk. I ring the doorbell, and Dylan answers the door. Dylan, Jay, and Keith, they all rent the townhouse together.

"Hey Dylan. Is Jay here?"

"Yea. Hold on a second." He turns toward the stairs. "JAY! JUDE'S HERE!" He turns back towards me. "He'll be down in about five minutes. Come on in, and make yourself at home." He opens the door a little wider and lets me in. I sit on the couch waiting for Jay. Dylan walks back into the kitchen. I hear Jay coming down the stairs, so I stand up.

"Hey Jude, I thought we were going out later tonight?"

"Jay… Look… I'm really sorry if I lead you on… But we're just not right for each other… I think we should see other people…" I finally look up from my shoes to see Jay there smiling.

"Jude… Thank you so much." I was shocked. "Because Jude… I just recently found out that…I'm gay. And Dylan and Keith… They're gay too. And I think I'm in love with them."

"Oh Jay! I'm so happy for you!" We hug, and say our goodbyes, but we promise to keep in touch.

Good, now that I'm single, I can go on Tommy's tour. To the Holiday Inn!

TJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJTJ

Flashback: After The Vinyl Palace

"Jude if I lead you on…"

"Can we just skip this?"

"Cool?"

"Cool."

"Look, Jude, working on a song it's like falling in love. At first it's a rush and then it gets painful, and sometimes you have to walk away. But sometimes you come out with something beautiful, like that song. Here just listen." He hands her the CD. "Don't quit. Cuz you're it girl. You're the real thing. You're even better."

Unsweet Sixteen Out In The Alley

"For what it's worth, Shay's a kid, and an idiot. And he made the wrong choice."

"It's not worth much, coming from you."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm so tired of falling for guys that don't fall back. It hurts. You all say the nicest things. I'm so great, I'm so nice, but none of you want to date. Tell me what I'm doing wrong. Tell me why I'm so easy to give and then maybe I can fix it."

"You're asking the wrong guy." He then kisses her and the lightning flashes in the background.

Unsweet Sixteen In Tommy's Office

"Come on, Tommy. I think we both know what you want to say. That it was a mistake right? A pity kiss. That you don't feel the way I do because I'm a kid… Get it over with. Lie to me."

"I can't anymore… So this is what we're gonna do. Either I have to quit working with you, or I can stay. But only if we both agree that kiss never happened."

"No, no, no, no…"

"You have to say it, or I have to leave."

"Why are you doing this?

"Jude. Say it."

(Whispers) "It never happened."

Should I Stay Or Should I Go

"When were you gonna tell me you were doing the Shay tour?"

"When were you gonna tell me you were doing my sister? What are you gonna date the whole family now? Cause Mom's available now and Grams is pretty cute… But Tommy...These last few weeks, I let myself fall for you again…And I thought you were falling back. Do you care about her? More than me?

"Jude, you can't ask me that?

"I'm asking."

In The Chrome Cat: Jude's 17th

"Sometimes people don't see who you really are, but I need you to try. Sadie and I… We weren't right…

"Why?"

"You know exactly why."

"Yeah…"

When Tommy Speeds Away

"Hey I didn't think you were gonna show."

"Jude… I have to go, And I don't think I'll be coming back."

"Tom? Sit, talk to me." I patted the seat across from me.

"I have a plane to catch. Bye."

He walks out of the restaurant. I leave money on the table and follow him. He gets in the car. Banging on the passenger's window where there is a creepy bald guy inside.

"Tom? Tom? Tommy?"

Banging on the back of his car as he pulls out of his parking spot.

"Tommy?" Screaming his name while he speeds away.

"TOMMY!"

End All Flashbacks

I was driving down to where the Holiday Inn was, and all these memories were resurfacing.

Shit, how was I going to do this?

End Chapter Three