32. Beyond Our Choices

"This is nice."

The sky looks beautiful as a painting on display in a museum. As the clouds covered the sunlight from the surface, Enigma let her back relax, her hand holding the glass of fresh milk that Sati was carrying while both are sitting down near Lake Eden. The wind blows calmly and the sound of tree branches makes Enigma's heart at peace.

She loosened her red trench coat. Her blue eyes stared at the lake in front of her and Sati. "It's so peaceful here. I can see why you like being here."

"My father designed Kujaku and its contents while working with the Analyst," Sati denoted, picking up a rock by the well and tossing it in the lake. "He knew I liked the sight of the sun as soon as he saw the sunrise I made."

"I like that sunrise," Enigma admitted, her eyes flickering for a moment. "How are things in the Matrix?"

"Still the same," Sati took a cookie and ate it. A small bird was flying over the lake. "Looks like the Suits and the Analyst are trying to find other alternatives to keep the Matrix stable. However," she sighed softly, "it's only a matter of time before they need a huge source of energy to keep the Machines alive."

In the end, they wanted her and her parents to return to the Matrix as their source of energy. Enigma wasn't surprised by that. The Analyst more or less also indicates the same thing a few days ago. "Our actions may lead to another war," Enigma remarked, not as speculation, but as fact. "Niobe won't be happy about it."

Sati ate the cookie with an uncertain expression. "When I devised a plan to save your mother, I was prepared to accept the consequences. I knew that my idea would produce karma, good or bad, on all of us."

"But not everyone has the same thoughts." Enigma's hand touched the small grass beside her. "Everyone can't accept the consequences of their choices." She laughed softly. "Causality."

"Causality," Sati repeated. The girl knows a little about the Merovingian and what kind of man he was in doing his business. "How was your life at IO?"

"Nice and weird," Enigma scratched the back of her head. Her blue eyes gaze shifted between calm and uncomfortable. "More comfortable, more environmentally friendly, and quieter than Zion. I enjoyed it," she quietly rubbing her forehead, "but I still miss Zion. Still miss Zion's old environment which is so different from IO. It feels strange. How many things can change drastically in a short time or slowly."

Sati didn't blame Enigma for her feelings. She also experienced the same thing after leaving her home and living with the Oracle, before moving into Kujaku and hiding with Niobe. But at least Sati could adapt to her surroundings as time passed. Enigma didn't get the chance. She was forced into an unconscious state - in the real world and the Matrix - for many years and had to feel a sudden loss of so many things.

"Therapies and social events help a lot," Enigma continued, sipping her milk slowly. "At least Neo got a much better therapist than that bastard. Although I feel a little sorry for Trinity's therapist. I mean, Trinity threw her chair so she could get her temper out in a steady-state. Granted, the therapist said that's normal for a lot of Pod-borns. Throwing or slamming therapists' things. But it still doesn't feel right. And it's just a matter of stuff. The first day I had a therapy session, I cried for three whole hours."

The milk had been drunk, but Enigma was still holding the glass. "A lot of young people at IO ask me to take part in social events. Most are just casual events. Picnics, birthdays, weddings, small concerts. It was nice. Sometimes they want to take Neo and Trinity along, but I always advise them not to. Mom and Dad need time to calm down. Social events, especially young kids, will only serve as a bad reminder."

To this day, Enigma still remembers the memories after all the chaos in San Francisco. How her parents looked at each other with amazement and tenderness while grabbing each other's hand. How Neo touched Trinity's hand gently while Trinity kept looking into Neo's eyes, unable to believe that his vision's back to normal. How Enigma slowly approached the two with a fearful expression before turned to relief when Trinity's smile and a soft chuckle escape Neo's mouth as they hugged tightly, joy of their family reunion and the sadness of 60 years of separation mingled in mutual silence.

The three of them settled in the apartment Sheperd gave when they first arrived at IO. In the few days they stay, there are times when Enigma finds Neo crying suddenly and sees Trinity screaming her name in her sleep. She tried her best to calm them down, although she had struggled with anxiety and panic attack as well, whenever she had flashback of their deaths and torture moments in Anomaleum. It broke Enigma's heart to heared their confessions.

Grief and stress over Trinity's death (and her 'car accident') that lead Neo's attempted suicide. Guilt and loss over her fake family in Matrix and real family in reality that crush Trinity's emotion and thought.

Sati nodded slowly. The sun shone again as the blue in the sky turned reddish-orange. Forcing a father to unable to help his dying daughter and guilt trip your lover's live, while simultaneously manipulating a mother's motherhood into a fake husband and children will cause a variety of deep emotions, no matter if they are soldiers of war. Not to mention, relieving moments when a young girl witnessed her parents died twice in front of you.

"Why do you think Oracle transferred the code to me?"

The question just came out of Enigma's mouth. It had been days since she and her parents had gone to the Analyst for answers. She knew the main reason why Oracle had done this. But her heart still doubts. She wasn't sure what she would do now that she knew all this information. What role will she play in the future.

For years, Enigma had contemplated herself with her essence. She knew she will play a role in the war because of the blessings she had, but that wasn't enough to convince herself to know what to do. Even knowing that she has a small part of The One inside, Enigma is still not 100% sure.

Thinking of herself as the next Oracle, giving advice and direction to people... yeah, that didn't seem right for her.

Enigma really needs the Oracle's help with all of this.

"The Oracle's thinking isn't easy to predict. Sometimes, Seraph and I are uncertain about what she thinks or what she will do. Maybe she knew all this was going to happen. Maybe she did it so that the Analyst's plan failed miserably. Maybe she did it for the future of Redpill who is still trapped in the Matrix." While picking up another cookie, Sati looked into Enigma's eyes gently. "Maybe she did it out of her own will to trust you."

We can never see past the choices we don't understand. An old-line spoken by the fortune teller years ago. Could she have done it so that Enigma could understand herself further with all these visions she had? So that she can be wiser in making decisions?

Enigma stroked her forehead. Thinking about this over and over won't make things any clearer. If Ghost was here, he would probably utter the words of famous philosophers to make things easier. Perhaps he will quote, "Not to be absolutely certain is, I think, one of the essential things in rationality" by Bertrand Russell or "Wisdom begins in wonder" by Socrates.

The blonded girl quickly took a breath as tears streamed from his eyes. Thinking about Ghost will only make her sad and stressed to death. She had already let go of the man she considered as her uncle (much like how her mother thought of Ghost as her brother) and other people she cares for during her emotional recovery. Morpheus, Sparks, Link, Zee, Cas, Star, Rock, Kid, Councilor Hamann, Maggie, Roland. Heck, she was even saddened to learn that The Ever Serious Man Lock had died when Zion was destroyed.

"Take a time," Seq once suggested to her one day when she accompanied him, Cybebe, and Lumin8 for a walk-in IO. His arm brushes her own like holding porcelain when she was discomforted with her new surrounding. "Don't force to understand everything in a short time."

Yeah. Maybe she should do that more often than she realized.

"Thank you, Sati," she smiles as she takes one last cookie. "For coming here. For everything."

Sati bowes humbly. "What will you do now?"

To be honest Enigma herself had no idea what he was going to do. Of course, she, Neo, Trinity, and the members of Mnemosyne plan to continue bringing about change in the Matrix with the abilities the three of them possess. But personally, Enigma doesn't have a conclusive plan with her life goals. Not to mention the many uncertain things that are still happening now.

The Analyst's still in control of the Matrix. Smith roams the Matrix with a purpose she doesn't know. The Merovingian vows to take revenge on her and Neo. The Suits and what actions they will take once the three of them are free from their grasp.

So many possibilities. Even her Sight cannot give much clear insight of what she saw, of what will happen next. Most of them are very vague.

But for now, she just needs to be more free and sure to herself.

"You know that noodle restaurant you used to work with? The one Neo visited?" She pointed out with a smirk. "I would taste one."

Sati chuckles. "Sounds good to me."

▪︎1001▪︎

The first thing Enigma noticed was the white color around it. Left or right. Up and down. Everything was painful on the eyes, but seemed familiar. "Mobil Ave," She whispered, recognizing the place where she had met Sati and her parents 60 years ago.

"Interesting right?" A voice asked from someone who was completely unexpected. "How can everything feel the same and yet not be the same at the same time?"

The Oracle sat on the chair with a sad look. She still looks the same as before, only much older. In her hand holding a cigarette. She inhaled the nicotine before exhaling through her mouth, gaze didn't change. She still looked at Enigma as if she had always been her favorite little girl.

Well, If she think about it, actually that thought isn't far from reality.

"I thought you were erased," Enigma remarked, walking over to the Oracle. She realizes that her body has shrunk again as an 8 year old child, searching for answers in a strange world.

The Oracle's eyebrows rose, interested. "And how are you sure about that?"

"Because I got the vision. It could be you're still alive, hiding, and the vision is wrong..." she fell silent.

There were so many things that Enigma wanted to tell her. But the longer she thought, the more she realized that what she was about to achieve would be farther and farther from her grasp.

Similar to what Smith said. The duality that is already binding, is different from one another.

Dream and reality.

Truth and lie.

Light and darkness.

Fate and determinism.

"Or it could be that I was dreaming of you from the fragments of an imagination of a child unable to grow emotionally. Both make sense, but are different from each other. A paradox, like Zhuang Zhou and the butterfly, doesn't know the difference between what's real and what's not real."

The Oracle put her cigarette in the trash. It was clear that she knew that wasn't what Enigma was about to say. "Your conclusion?" she asked.

"Does it matter? In the end, everything is rooted in choices. It's choices that shape things." Enigma gave a small smile, feeling that the older woman already knew what answer she needed. "Besides, I'm tired of having to think hard every time I see you."

She laughed. "Not a bad answer, Little One. Fair enough. A little lazy, I might add."

Silence for a moment. From the carriage entrance, a small butterfly flew into Mobil Ave before landing right on Oracle's shoulder. "Everything that has a beginning has an end," the old woman said as the sound of train wheels scraping, filled the silence of Mobil Ave.

"But every end creates a new beginning," Enigma finished with sincere smile before the noise ended her meeting with Oracle, whether real or not.


Note: And thus, we reach the end of A Conscious Program.

Thank you everyone who gives your support with this story. I'm happy that people ready A Conscious Program. Of course, for all I know, this might not be the last I will wrote Enigma's story. The future of Matrix movies still left uncertain. Maybe there will be sequel, maybe not. I mean, if Lana wants to, I won't mind.

I do have some general idea regarding Enigma and from Resurrections itself. I'm not sure if I will wrote it or not. It all depends.