Chapter Eight: Running Again

The three fugitives walked down the dirt path quietly. Another day, another road to travel. This time they were entering the small mountain pass. It only seemed to last about ten miles, so they would be among the towering mountains for about a week or so. It was the day after Zuko's first lightning lesson with Kaya, and she still had a lot on her mind. She hardly even noticed when Zuko was talking to her.

"Kaya, are you okay?" he asked.

She blinked and dived back into reality immediately. She looked at Zuko. "Oh, yeah, I'm fine. Why?"

"You were just spaced out is all," he said.

That didn't seem to surprise her. She was still questioning herself repeatedly about her feelings for Zuko. It seemed so overly-dramatic in her view. But what else was there to think about? She had squat ideas for her next step in the world besides trying to avoid Fire Nation soldiers, and every time she thought of keeping Aang's favor, more arguments about Zuko would rush through her mind. It was an unavoidable subject, no matter how hard she tried.

"I forgot to ask you," Zuko began, "what did you forget to bring when we were leaving Kaihen?"

She looked down at sadly and sighed. "It was my music box. My mother gave it to me when I turned five." She paused and said finally, "I promised to her that I would keep it safe and in tact." She fought back tears. "Guess that's a promise I wasn't able to keep."

Zuko's eyes softened. "I'm sorry you couldn't save it."

She looked up and forced a smile. "Don't be. It's not like you're the one who burned the house."

"Yeah, but I feel like I could've done something," he said thoughtfully.

Kaya shook her head. "Just forget about it. I'll be fine."

Zuko watched her fold her arms and stare at the ground beneath her as she walked. She had been acting strangely ever since the day before. And why wouldn't she? That was quite an unexpected stunt she pulled during bending lessons. He still couldn't believe that their lips actually touched. He touched his gently with his fingers, as if trying to remember what it felt like. He shook himself awake. No. He shouldn't be worrying about silly things like that. It just wasn't like himself. But then again, lately he had been wondering who he really was in the world. He had saved someone who had resented his father's decisions. He was taking bending lessons from someone he had only met a few days ago. He told a girl he might have never known in the first place about his usually-secret past. But on the other hand, she offered them a place to stay, offered him bending lessons, and understood his pain in a way. So there were reasons to his actions. Maybe it wasn't a matter of his inner identity. Maybe it was a matter of his heart.

He gritted his teeth. That sounded so corny. She was an acquaintance; nothing more and nothing less.

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The ground under their feet soon became rocky and scattered with gravel. As they walked, the rocks scratched and scuffed their shoes. No way would they be able to get a good night's sleep while lying on this kind of surface. Luckily, after they had walked far enough, they found a cave etched into the bottom side of a mountain a little bit after sunset. There they would stay for the night.

As the sparks of the fire lit up the walls of the cave, Zuko looked at Kaya who was playing with her hair while humming a tune to herself softly. She always seems so carefree, thought Zuko as he watched her. He stared at her for the longest time, and was only brought awake by the sound of her voice.

"Zuko, what are you looking at?" she asked, her attention now focused on him.

He blinked and shook his head quickly. "Sorry," he said looking back at the fire.

Kaya shrugged it off and got up. "I'll be outside," she said.

Probably to do more firebending like the last time she excused herself, he thought, reflecting upon the memory.

"What's on your mind, Zuko?" Iroh asked when Kaya left. "It's seems you're a bit distracted nowadays."

Zuko frowned. "I'm fine, Uncle."

"Are you sure?" he asked. "You know you can tell me anything."

"No," Zuko said under his breath. "I don't think I can." He got up. "I'm going to see what she's doing. I'm curious to see whether she's firebending or not."

As he walked out, Iroh called after him, "Curiosity killed the mouse cat."

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But she wasn't firebending. She was doing her favourite nighttime hobby: stargazing. This was the second time he had caught her doing so. But this time she was in a deeper trance, her eyes transfixed on the stars above her. She hardly heard his footsteps, but whipped around when he heard him speak.

"Hey," he said softly.

She smiled. "Hey." She pulled in her legs and watched as he sat down next to her. "What's up?"

He didn't answer right away. He instead looked up, as if trying to understand what the big deal was. "You do this a lot, don't you?" he asked.

"Mmhmm," she mumbled, staring up as well.

"Why, though?" he asked.

She shrugged. "Why not? It's not like it's a crime. I can do whatever I want, right?"

"I guess," he said hesitantly.

"Well, I might as well spend it looking at something beautiful," she finished with satisfaction.

He nodded in agreement.

They exchanged the longest barrier of silence ever received from each other. It took about five minutes for one of them to say something. And even if she said it, she wasn't pleased with what slipped out of her mouth afterwards.

"I know about your search for the Avatar," she said with a gulp.

His eyes widened and his head snapped in her direction. "You do?"

She nodded. "But why?"

He didn't respond.

"It has something to do with the honor you keep saying that you want to regain, huh?"

He hung back the word, but it pushed its way past his lips. "Yes."

Kaya threw her fist against the ground and stood up with her arms folded. "I don't believe this," she groaned.

"Don't believe what?" Zuko asked, getting up as well.

She turned her back to him. "You're his son, Zuko. You shouldn't have to think that you need to earn that position."

Zuko frowned. "But apparently, that's what I have to do. And I intend to accomplish what I want."

Kaya gritted her teeth before answering. "He isn't much of a father if he's disowned you and banished you from your own country."

"Mind your own business!" he yelled.

Yelled. He had yelled at her; something he had never done before. And it scared her. She gripped the sleeves of her shirt tighter.

"Leave Aang alone!" she shouted back, still not looking at him.

"Aang? You've met him?"

"It doesn't matter. What matters is what you're doing to yourself."

"And what's that?" He yelled again.

She started to fight back the tears and felt her nails making small tears into her sleeves. "You're letting someone who has insulted you since you were younger take advantage of you as means of war."

"Don't give me your 'Fire Nation rebellion' trash! I will find the Avatar and I will earn my throne back!"

She finally turned around and released her fingers from her elbows. "Listen to you! You sound like a monster! Stop being so stubborn!"

Tears burst from her eyes. She didn't like arguing with him. But she stood her ground and waited for his comeback.

He wasn't the only one who wasn't exactly enjoying their spat. As he saw the tears start to stream down her cheeks, he felt himself start to lose his voice.

"Why do you care so much anyway?" he managed to bellow.

They gaped at each other for a few seconds before she started to run again. She ran away from the cave, her shoes kicking back rocks and her eyes sending a trail of tears behind her. She didn't care where she was going. She didn't care why. She just didn't want to see his face again. She heard his footsteps behind her and his shouts carrying after her. But she only ran faster until she was moving towards the wood again. She felt the bark of the trees scrape her arms and tear through her sleeves. But she kept going. It wasn't till a few minutes later when she finally tripped on an overgrown root from a large elm tree. His footsteps grew closer and she scrambled up to her feet. She hid behind the elm and clutched the cut on her right arm, feeling the blood trickle through her fingers.

Zuko heard her heavy breathing and moved towards the tree she was behind slowly. She at last came into view, but not in the best condition. He looked at her wound and his eyes softened. He crouched down and approached his hand towards her arm.

"Don't touch me," she said in a raspy exhale.

He flinched. "I just want to-"

"Why do you care so much anyway?" she cried. She got up again and limped away, her hand wiping away more blood.

He watched her walk away pitifully. He wanted to help her, but she wouldn't let him. He scoffed to himself. Why did that sound familiar?

He got up to his feet and walked back to the mountains.

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"Good, you're back," Iroh said, when Zuko returned to the cave.

The fire was starting to weaken and Iroh was barely awake. But he was a bit surprised when he saw that only Zuko came back.

"I heard you and Kaya yelling," he continued as Zuko leaned against the wall of the cave. "Is everything okay?"

"Kaya's not coming back," Zuko said instantly.

Iroh sat up. "What happened?"

Zuko sighed. "She got mad at me and ran away. When I tried to help her, she just got even angrier and wouldn't even let me look at the cut on her arm."

Iroh's eyes widened. "She got hurt? Zuko, you must go after her."

"Why should I?" he grunted.

"Well, you're letting someone who loves you get into a load of danger."

"She doesn't love me!" Zuko shouted.

Iroh chuckled. "Sure she doesn't, sure she doesn't. And I supposed you do not love her either?"

"No! As a matter of fact, I don't."

"Still, the fact is that she could get killed out there. Especially if she's injured. If you don't go get her now, you'll have the life of a young girl on your conscience."

Iroh lied back down while Zuko looked at him with a world of consideration on his mind.

He had just had an argument with someone who had questioned his decision of earning his honor. But she did make reasonable points within their quarrel. And like Uncle said, he couldn't just let her wander off like that. She might get hurt even more. With this being thought over a hundred times over, he made his choice and left Iroh and the cave to look for Kaya.