a/n: this chapter is slightly shorter, but it seemed a good way to end this chapter. I'm not going to promise when a new chapter will be up. It'll be a while. Tomorrow I'm going to start me first real job since graduating, so I'm going to have to get used to the new schedule. I'll probably be really tired these first weeks. I'll try to write in the weekends, but no promises. Thanks for all the wonderful reviews. I'm glad you agreed with the letter and found it to be realistic. My guess is that next chapter will deal with the funeral and Alex talking to Abby. But nothing's sure.

Chapter six

Slowly he approached as she sat on a big wooden stem that lay horizontally. Huddled together she seemed even smaller than usual. She was leaning forward, her elbows on her knees and her head in her hands, head hung low. He sat down next to her and put her arms around her, pulling her against his side.

"What did the lawyer give you?"

"A letter from Jenny."

He was going to leave it up to her if she wanted to share the contents of the letter. He saw it was too fresh for her at the moment. "Jessica's mother picked Abby up. She'll be back after dinner." He wondered if his words were getting through to her. If they didn't, it didn't really matter.

"Jenny took care of everything. There's money for Abby and all the papers are ready. All I needed to do was sign them. I am now her guardian." She took a big sigh. "She has so much faith in me. She wrote that I would be all right, that she wouldn't want someone else to take care of her daughter. I just…I don't know if I can do this. Abby… I… I can't afford to make mistakes. She's already going through so much. She doesn't need me to mess it all up."

For Bobby there was no doubt in his mind that Alex could raise Abby. However she wasn't going to take his words for it, nor Jenny's for that matter. But he was going to try. "Abby adores you, Alex. That much I've seen. Jenny knew you, you were her best friend. Do you think she would have trusted her child with just anyone?"

Listening to his words she shook her head. She didn't know if she should let Bobby read the letter. At the moment it would reveal more than she was ready to admit. But on the other side he would understand her and her relationship with Jenny better.

"You're more than capable of raising Abby. I've seen how you are with her and children in general. You're a kind, loving and warm person. With you Abby will remember her mother, but also find a new mother who will love her unconditionally."

"I…I can't be her mother. She will always have only one mother." There was a bit of anger in her voice.

"I know that." The anger in her voice didn't surprise him. Yet she did need to hear the truth. "You know as well as I do that you are going to be Abby's mother figure and in time you will be her mother. Making decisions mothers make for their child. And yes…" He placed a finger on her lips as she was about to object again. He didn't miss the flash of anger in her eyes. "in time you are going to truly be her mother." He could see the anger turn into acceptance.

Leaning back from him she tilted her head like he had done so many times before, and simply looked him in the eyes. Not a word was said between them. Her eyes conveyed her gratitude for his presence and his showed that he wasn't going anywhere. The silent communication between them as strong as ever.

Standing up, she offered him her hand, which he accepted. Side by side they walked passed the lake. "Stay or go?" Alex asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Am I going to stay here with Abby and quit my job? Or am I going to take Abby away from everything she's ever known and move her to New York? What do you think I should do?" Stopping she turned to him.

She was putting him on the spot. He didn't have an answer to her question. He couldn't imagine his life without her. Which meant he wanted her back in NY. But Alex wasn't alone in this anymore. It was important that Abby was ready. Still where did that leave them if she decided to stay here? Would that be the end of the best thing in his life? What it came down to was that his feelings on it didn't count. "I can't tell you that. It's a difficult decision to make. It's not one that I can make for you."

She didn't like his answer. She wanted more from him. To get the answer she wanted she would have to ask a direct question. "What do you want me to do?"

He ran a hand through his curly hair. Was this the time to tell the truth? The look in her eyes told him she wanted him to help her out. "You… you know how I feel about our partnership. I wouldn't want you to leave and move here. I can't be selfish in this. You need to do what's best for the both of you. I… I can deal with losing you." He said he could, but he didn't know how he was going to do that. It wasn't all about their partnership. Sure another partner would suck, but he could live with that. What he couldn't live with was not having Alex to talk to or share a dinner with. Not being able to look into her warm, assuring eyes. Not to hear her snarky comments. Most of all missing her presence by his side.

"I want to be selfish. Everybody I know and love is in New York. You are in New York." She paused to let those words sink in. "I always liked it here. It's peaceful and beautiful. I do think this is a good place to grow up. Better than New York." She started walking again. "What would I do here? I've always been a cop. I don't think they need a NY cop here."

"You've got some time to think about this. Talk to Abby. Who knows, she might surprise you. And.." He took her hand in his. "whatever you decide, I'll always be here for you."

TBC...