Chapter 15: Hope
When I was officially released from the hospital, I was honestly still incredibly beat up. My damaged heart, lung, and ribs would take around three months before I was able to continue my usual physical activities. Even then, I'd been warned I'd probably still not be at 100% until closer to eight months to a year.
I was obviously on medical leave from my gym for the next few months, too. I wasn't allowed any taxing training, and Lance was at my side keeping an eye on me. Granted, I couldn't have done anything physically demanding if I'd wanted to. I felt like total shit.
I'd already told Lance I wasn't quite ready to go back to my home, yet. That's how I ended up in Lance's simple home. He'd been informing my household on my status, so at least they weren't in the dark about where I'd vanished to. I'd pushed anyone and anything in my life completely away and had clung to Lance like a terrified child, he'd even gone to collect me some clothes.
I don't know how he put up with me, but somehow, he didn't even make me feel like I was a burden.
"Lance," I stated softly, curled up beside him in his bed after living with him the past week and a half. "Is it okay if I'm falling in love with you?" I would back off in a heartbeat if this was just pity and friendship.
He smiled faintly in the darkness, reaching out and tangling his fingers through my hair as he cupped my face. "I don't mind, Silver. I confessed my feelings for you a long time ago, so you already know how I feel."
"Still?" I asked softly.
"Of course. I said I love you. I didn't use the word like on purpose. I always have. I do know you need to take things slow, though. You're not quite ready for what I have for you yet," he chuckled softly.
My eyes were wide, my heart racing. I knew he was only looking out for me, but the dizzying attraction and fresh love had me wanting to prove him wrong. I'd become experienced enough to learn the difference between young and old love. From what I'd gathered, relationships were typically a mix of both, at least, mine had been.
They were scary, thrilling, and incredibly hot at the beginning, but then familiarity and comfort would work their way in. Something stable could be confused for boring. After seven years, my relationship with Gold had been incredibly stable and clockwork. I'd loved it. Of course, there had still been thrills of attraction and heat, but this… this was just wow. It was like a white-hot nova compared to an earthly campfire. This was infatuation and lust; a sexy flame was in my gut and the confidence I was feeling was intoxicating.
I wasn't as insecure as I had been back when Gold had introduced romance to me as a teen. I was a rather confident adult at this point, working on mature even. It was still scary to a point, because truthfully, I'd only known Gold… Lance and I had kissed in the past, but it had been so long ago.
But holy shit I wanted this. I kissed him softly, but it most certainly wasn't enough. So, I kissed him again, and again. Then I parted my lips, coaxing my tongue into his mouth. He easily parted his lips for me, groaning softly as our tongues brushed sensually. That noise sent a happy shiver down my spine. And I kept kissing him, trying to learn this new style. It was incredibly different than kissing Gold, from the pressure to the way his tongue moved, or even just the shape of his face. It was frustrating, but hot, too.
I was straddling him at that point, amazed as he got hard. He hadn't even gotten hard helping me bathe the first couple weeks of my recovery. I'd figured he hadn't been attracted to me that way anymore. I'd been long since… up and ready. I'd felt the pressure since our lips first touched, my control over my emotions likely not quite as mature. Then again, I was gently grinding against him, and it would have been insulting at this point if he hadn't had at least pitched a tent for me.
"The condition is you have to lead on what you want," he husked softly in my ear, "I'm not sure what you're ready for."
"I want to get off," I admitted, not even going to try and be embarrassed at this point. My boxers were soaked with precum, and I wanted Lance bad.
I reached down and fumbled with the cloth night pants he had on, easily undoing the drawstring and pushing them and his boxers down. It was dark in his bedroom, but I could still make out the impressive cock in front of me. Hell. Lance was huge. I could wrap both my damn hands stacked around it. Was I even going to able to fit that? I wasn't going to be able to do that tonight, but for future reference we would definitely need to take things slow. Tonight, I just wanted hot and heavy grinding, easy movements and friction.
"Do you have any lube?" I asked, unable to take my eyes off the cock in front of me. Clearly, I was attracted to men. I knew that anyway, but it was absolute confirmation. Dicks were great.
"Yeah, want me to grab it?"
"I will. Where?" I had to move regardless since I was straddling his thighs.
He motioned towards the bedside, a standard place for such items. I got up and pulled open the drawer. It was difficult to make out the details, but I still flushed at the open box of condoms that were over half gone, and it was a big box of the things, too… Of course, the lube wasn't exactly unused. I couldn't help wondering if it was men, women, or both. The vibrator looked more tailored to the female form, but Gold and I had tried vibrators, too. They were a ton of fun but made it difficult to have as much feeling immediately after use (things felt a bit numb after).
I slipped off my boxers, finally feeling a bit shy. The shyness only lasted until I gently ground my hips into Lance's, our cocks brushing.
"Fuck," Lance hissed, sitting up and grabbing me, yanking my face to his so he could kiss me.
It was difficult to come from grinding alone, but it did feel amazing. Gold had been a bit bigger than me (mostly thicker), but there was a good two-inch difference between Lance's and my sizes… I was a bit too distracted to feel insulted. We were both breathing so hard the kisses had turned to open mouth. I finally grabbed the lube, frustrated and desperate to come at this point. Lance's encouraging moan almost undid me.
He grabbed my ass with both his hands, pulling me even tighter against him as I jerked us both off. I didn't want to finish too quickly before him, so I tried to focus more on him, trying to learn his tolerance. He was so stiff and thick, and I could feel him getting even stiffer as he got close.
"Close," he husked in warning, sinking his teeth into my earlobe. "Ah, Silver…"
The way he hissed my name! His cock twitching against mine had me coming completely undone, his hot cum making it even slicker. I only lasted a second more, unable to help my cry of pleasure. It felt so good! It took me several moments to just get over the afterglow, I felt completely dazed.
The pain pills I would need were by far worth this. I had a feeling I wasn't supposed to let my heart race like this.
"You certainly came enough," Lance teased me with a chuckle once we finally managed to catch our breaths.
"It's been a minute," I defended myself simply, tingling satisfaction flowing through my veins.
I'd been scared how my first-time having sex would have gone, and I was shocked it'd been so easy… and fast. I was beyond thankful. After Gold touching me had felt like poison, I'd been terrified. Being in control had helped, and being with someone I loved and trusted…
Now for the awkward clean up part…
"I would love to grab you in my arms and carry you off to the shower, but I don't think I can with your ribs and chest like they are."
I chuckled nervously and nodded. "The sentiment is still appreciated. A quick hot shower sounds amazing."
I carefully un-straddled my… new boyfriend and caught my balance, trying to keep as much semen off the sheets as I could. We made our way to the bathroom, and our quick steamy shower unsurprisingly got steamier.
"I want you in me," I practically begged, my hands braced on the shower wall. Lance was rubbing his cock against my ass, teasing me. He was holding my hips, keeping my weight off my arms, used to how I had to move with my injuries.
"I'd like to oblige, but I think you're going to need another couple weeks to heal before you can handle that. This will just have to do," he teased me, turning me towards him and getting on his knees to take me in his mouth.
I saw stars. His tongue sliding up my balls made my breath catch, and the way he sucked the head of my cock was too much to stand. Then he took me down his throat and I couldn't help my curse, rising up onto my tip toes. I believe I lasted 48 seconds. Yeah, he'd definitely done this before.
"Already?" he teased after spitting out my semen. Honestly, I more than eager to return the favor, but he told me not to bother. "Not as young as I used to be," he admitted, looking a bit embarrassed. I just grinned teasingly; he was hard but clearly a bit too sensitive to go again.
We dried each other off, and only bothered to throw our underwear on before collapsing into bed. I practically passed out after the warm shower and getting off twice. I was nestled into Lance's arms like a skitty, so incredibly happy.
xxxxxxx
I hissed in pleasure as I eased into the hot spring, keeping the water from covering my scars out of habit even though they'd sealed. Blackthorn was amazing. The same lava that fed Clair's gym also heated the water in the springs and the Dragon Den. Lance looked so content, his head laying back against the stone. I smirked at the various scars on his chest. Once my stab and surgery wounds fully healed, I'd have some badass scars myself.
The stitches had melted away, and honestly at this point my cut from open heart surgery was an ugly scabby wound.
I had other lighter nicks and scrapes along my body, but not like the few deep red long healed scares on Lance's body. Those were from dragons. I guessed it was a training hazard you had to accept.
"I'd love to fuck you, too, but technically the baths are public. Stop look at me like that," Lance scoffed, and I smirked, wading over to him.
I was going back to Viridian tomorrow. I was just around three months total into my recovery at this point, and I was doing a lot better. I still had weakness and pain, and I had to take it easy still, but I wasn't delicate and helpless like I had been. I'd been doing some light training, for both my pokemon and my own body. I still tired out quickly, and I was out of shape, but it was a vast improvement.
My gym would open again in two weeks. The league had been organizing challengers for me, holding preliminaries and narrowing down the challengers I'd have to face. I was thankful to say the least. Apparently, most gym leaders held preliminaries regularly, as it cut down on the battles they had to conduct.
For obvious reasons though, I wasn't exactly looking to take on any trainers right now as apprentices. The league had arranged for the preliminary trainers themselves.
Amusingly enough, Lance was kind of my boss. He was one of the main league organizers, holding the rank of champion of the elite four. He almost never battled anyone, though. He'd battle the winner of the three-year league for the title, and no one had bested him yet. Mostly he marched around and handled public relations with other regions as a type of emissary. Honestly, I was surprised how busy he usually was. He had moments of doing nothing, but also nights he was so busy he couldn't make it home.
"Lance?" I questioned, and he opened his eyes. "Will you live with me?"
He coughed lightly. "I- uh." Silence. I raised an eyebrow. "Are you okay with that?"
"I've liked living with you," I admitted. I sighed, feeling shy. "You don't have to live with me… but maybe you could stay with me more often than not?"
He looked a bit shy himself. "I haven't really stayed in one place before. Truthfully, the past two months are the most I've ever stayed in my house. Can we take it one step at a time? I've enjoyed it, too, Silver. It's just a lot at once."
I nodded in understanding.
We pulled ourselves out of the bath before we cooked ourselves, and then Lance had to head over to the league for some meeting about environmental effects of a new daycare they wanted to open in Celadon City. I just told him not to blow up anything around the city and he scoffed. I sighed and went to go bug Clair, hoping she might offer me a light battle. I still felt so rusty.
Thankfully she did, and then I offered to make her dinner as thanks. I had no idea if Lance would be back in time to want something, but I cooked enough for three just in case.
"Wow," she stated, biting into the simple soft tacos I'd put together.
I'd had to cook for myself my entire childhood, and usually I'd had to cook over fire. I'd gotten creative to keep myself alive. Yogurt, avocado, pineapple, lime, and red onion made a tasty and easy filling, garnished with a wedge of avocado and some raw red onion in a store-bought packet of soft tortillas. All but one of the items were safe out of refrigeration, too.
"This is amazing," she complimented, and I felt a happy spark of pride at the compliment. I hadn't cooked much the past few years since the staff at Viridian took care of me, but I'd been cooking for Lance the past two months. He cooked for me as well on occasion, and honestly, it'd been kind of romantic…
Afterwards she helped herself to Lance's liquor and poured us both a glass of bourbon. I only took a single sip, not able to drink alcohol with all the medicine I was still taking.
"Has Lance ever dated anyone?" I asked curiously. Lance had dodged the question like a pro when I asked him directly. His cousin would be a better source.
"Eh," Clair responded, tilting her head back and forth. "I guess not really. He's had a few girlfriends, but he's bad at keeping them around. He's hard to reach, and I think people who date him have a hard time feeling close sometimes. By the way, he mentioned you two are dating."
Oh. I flushed, gazing at the table. For some reason I thought he'd be more hush hush about us.
"Any reason you ask?" she continued.
"I… don't think it's appropriate to bring up," I responded nervously. So many missing condoms! I was jealous, so jealous! "I just noticed he has at least… been with some other people."
Clair just laughed. "Well, yeah, single people tend to have sex, too. But no, he hasn't really mentioned dating anyone. He's gone on a few dates at the elder's request, but he hasn't mentioned dating anyone to me. You're the first in… years."
I felt honored to say the least. One-night stands were still totally alien to me, but Gold had had a history, too. At least I was feeling much less jealous.
When Lance returned home late that night, I woke up and happily greeted him with a soft kiss. "I love you," I whispered easily. I'd managed the words about a week into dating, completely shy and embarrassed. "There's some leftovers in the fridge if you're hungry."
"I love you, too. It's so nice coming home to you curled up in my bed…"
xxxxxxx
Well, the media had been hinting at my breakup with Gold, noticing I hadn't been by his side the past few months. Granted, they hadn't been able to find me to confirm. It had been guessed that I might have just been recovering in a hospital from a training accident or that a bad breakup had been the reason for me vanishing. No official reason for me vanishing had ever been publicly released, but it was easy to see in my weakened stated something had happened. Most assumed I'd been injured in the Mount Silver incident with the incidents lining up, but the Rocket attack had never been released to the public.
However, news was I was back in Viridian and Gold was not. He'd vanished off the face of the earth after withdrawing from the Pokeathlon. That had been hush-hush, too. He'd won the gold the first three weeks, come back, scored horribly, and then just vanished. All his things were gone from the mansion. It was surreal.
It'd been blissful rebound with Lance, but I stood there alone in the room I'd shared with Gold, my heart broke. I was finally realizing he was gone. I cried my eyes out all afternoon, locking myself in my room. It was like I'd been avoiding all the pain and agony, and suddenly had to pay my debt back with interest. I'd cried plenty in the hospital after we'd broken up, but this was the first time I was in a familiar situation without him. I had a feeling Lance had purposely let me come back alone so I could have a chance to just mourn.
I was completely caught off guard when a gentle knock came at the door, and Crystal of all people called out my name. Surprised, I wiped my eyes and went to greet her. My eyes were probably bright red, and she gave me a sad smile.
"Welcome home. I thought you might like a friend here," she stated gently. "How has everything been going?"
I weakly shook my head. "Gold didn't even visit me until after the pokeathlon was over. I broke up with him…"
"I heard," she admitted, "and I'm going to agree that was beyond dumb of him. It was beyond dumb of me, too. When I saw the news and saw what had happened, I can't imagine how terrifying that was. I heard you were in the hospital, but I didn't know how bad it was. Gold knew though, he had no excuse."
"He didn't know everything that happened," I admitted. "I don't know if you know everything that happened either."
"I'm not sure," Crystal admitted, and I relaxed. She didn't. Honestly, it made me feel better. I didn't like that weird pity look I got. Lance had only told Gold, but I wasn't sure who Gold had told beyond Blue. "He left to Hoenn for a bit. He said he wanted to give you some space."
"Does he know I'm dating Lance?" I asked, curios.
Obviously not going by how surprised Crystal looked. I flushed, averting my gaze. "How long?" she asked.
I flushed further. Okay. It looked bad. I mean, it was my choice, and I didn't have to defend my choices to anyone, but I didn't mean to come off as a total insensitive jackass. "Lance was the one there when I woke up," I explained carefully. Crystal gave an understanding nod. "I've always kind of had feelings for Lance… but I confessed about a week after I got out of the hospital."
Yeah… a seven-year long relationship ended, and a new one started about a month later. I guess that was sudden. In the moment it hadn't seemed such a big deal.
"Are you happy?"
"Right now, no," I laughed weakly. "With Lance in general…? Yes. It's been… amazing."
It really had been nice. I didn't appreciate that Lance was so busy, and our relationship was young, so I needed a lot of attention. Lance always managed to spend any spare moments with me, though. The sex had been too good for mere words to convey, too. I knew he was extra busy because he'd spent those weeks in the hospital with me and was making up a lot of work, too. I'd be really busy here soon myself…
"Your being happy is the most important thing, Silver. It's okay to cry and be sad at what you lost. It's just overall, you want a net positive."
I nodded, thankful for the advice. "Do you have any room to give that advice?" I asked casually, wanting to tease her.
She flushed, and I got a punch in the arm. I smiled faintly. I was thankful it was Crys. I couldn't stand being treated like some delicate flower. "Probably not," she huffed. "I'm jealous how you can just walk into two amazing relationships in a row, and I can't find anyone!"
"You're too busy to meet anyone," I stated without trying to sugarcoat anything. "Lance is busy, but he makes time for me. It's more than just a date once a week. Try actually having a second date sometimes."
She rolled her eyes at my attempt at dating advice but nodded. Something told me her mom had likely told her the exact same thing. Granted, Crystal's mom seemed great for getting first dates… or rather, one-night stands, but she seemed maybe not the best at a relationship.
"How's your wound?" she asked curiously. She sucked in a breath when I tugged my shirt up enough to show off the ugly wounds. "Ouch."
"At least my ribs aren't purple and green anymore," I offered. "They had to do a lot of surgery to fix up some of my organs, too. I'm still weak, but honestly not nearly as bad off. The pain medicine withdrawals aren't fun either."
I'd had to take high doses. I knew a mild addiction would likely form. I could manage. If anything, I was thankful I wasn't having to take so much medicine.
Crystal stayed with me all afternoon. I was surprised. Usually, she was so busy. I think she was trying to apologize for not being with me after I'd been so badly injured. "You should visit Blue," she stated as we shared dinner.
I averted my eyes and sighed. "I know…"
"Postpartum depression is no joke. She's been having a really had time feeling like an awful mother and sister."
I paled. I was being a selfish brat. I nodded. I'd do that first thing tomorrow. I was okay now. Lance had really given me an environment to heal the past few months. I'd even been going to therapy at Lance's demand. I couldn't just lock my old life away in a little box and pretend it didn't exist.
Before, I'd felt like I'd been in a rough stormy sea with a rock tied to my leg. I'd been drowning. I'd been so hurt and scared. I of course still had moments I had to take a deep breath and tell myself it was okay. It was more like treading in a calm lagoon though. It scared me to think about if Lance hadn't been there. Well, likely I probably would have died. Those enraged pokemon likely wouldn't have let anyone else near me, and they couldn't have saved my life. They could have only suspended my death.
"I'll go visit her first thing tomorrow."
Spoilers for the preciousmetal fans: Gold comes back in chapter 25. No other details~
