"Wolves are strange. You know how the males are. Take time with your decision because it's going to follow you for the rest of your life."
He hadn't meant to walk in on an intimate conversation. So with great stealth and carefulness, he attempted to leave unnoticed.
One step.
Two.
Almost there.
"The problem is that a lot of people and us females included, sometimes forget that our males know pretty quickly who they love."
And just like that, his movements ceased.
The speaker was correct in absolutely everything she stated and based on the intensity of the tone, she was trying to get the recipient to understand such a thing. Instinct of that regard was all but integrated into male wolves. For most, they recognized early on whom they wanted to pursue. Now, if their intended didn't want them, then they would sometimes proceed to different choices.
"Stick to the one that loves you, Kara. Not the one that you think you love. We all know that Ginta would move heaven and earth for you. Akari? He will love you on his terms. Take some time to think about, kay?"
An unsteady breath was taken in. For a moment, Koga didn't know if it belonged to him or Kara. However, if his trembling hands were any indication, then such nervousness belonged to him alone. With feet planted and helpless to move, he continued to monitor the conversation of his pack.
"That's the thing about male wolves. They either love you from the start or don't. As females, we can grow to love, but them? Their beast knows pretty quickly."
She wasn't wrong. It had been like that for most of the males in the pack. Himself included. Trying to close his eyes and take calm breaths, he struggled to not allow memories from the past to invade once more. He knew why this conversation hit a little close to home.
"Hell, look at our Alpha. He knew the first day. He'd seen a thousand faces in life, and even still, he knew the moment that he met her that she would be the one."
And just like that, the memories came.
The kidnapping.
Leading her back to the den.
Hell, even the order he gave to not have her harmed echoed in the back of his mind.
Memories of the way her hair danced with the strong winds of the mountain. Or the way she stormed around his cave and demanded to be released. All without any regard for rank or youkai politics.
She had been brave. Stupid. But brave.
Luckily, he had seen her behavior and come back with a conclusion that had shocked even himself. And from then on, no one else had held his attention.
Unconsciously allowing a low growl out, he tried to tell his mind to forget such things. If he continued all the memories to flood back as they were doing, then he was not sure he could make it another hundred years without being driven mad. For a while there, in the Feudal Era, he had wondered if he would be able to survive her disappearance.
Luckily, he had the pack.
They had embraced the priestess like she was one of their own, and with it, they had mourned her disappearance as much as he.
For months, he had gone and howled at the moon at such an injustice.
For months, they had joined in.
For years, he refused to so much as step back in her village.
For years, they had assisted in alternating shifts and ensuring their Alpha had no additional reminders of the love he had lost.
Together, they had survived.
But now?
Now that memories had started flooding back and appearing day after day? Now that there was hope? He didn't know what to expect. More importantly, he didn't know if he could survive being disappointed or heartbroken again. Once again, his pack had tried to prepare him for such a thing.
"She was human." Ginta had reminded him in passing. "We smelled her aging." Hakkaku had added.
Even still, despite all logic and knowledge regarding humanity, there was hope for her survival radiating off every wolf in his domain.
It was fucking midnight.
Midnight and he was wide awake.
All because of this pandemic.
All because of the snoring.
Turning to face the wall that sheltered the room across from him, he wanted nothing more than to bang on it and cause the noise to cease. Instead, he allowed the unison snores to continue. Reluctantly, he reminded himself that such actions should make him pleased as an Alpha. Thrilled even. After all, the snores were coming from Ginta and Kara.
The she-wolf had apparently listened and made her decision. One that consisted of his Beta. A choice that only half the pack had expected. All evening they had displayed affection to one another between shared grins, laughs, and touches.
He should have been happy. But instead, it had reminded him of something else entirely. Their contagious happiness and affection had caused most of his pack to beam in understanding. For him, it had filled him with images of how things would have turned out if a certain priestess had received the same advice that Kara had gotten. More importantly, if she would have actually listened to it.
All evening, he thought of how different his life would have been if the priestess hadn't left. If she had said one simple word.
Yes.
As snores penetrated his eardrums, he couldn't help but envision her next to him. Laughing, smiling, and simply lounging in bed. They would have been so happy in an alternate universe. God, if only she could have known such a thing. They, too, much like Ginta, would have spent nights so blissfully passed out that snoring occurred.
But instead, her heart and eyes had been focused on the two-timing mutt.
Rubbing his temple in exhaustion, he tried to will away such thoughts. They were dangerous. Romancing the past and trying to imagine different outcomes did nothing but hurt the soul. The past was the past. Despite all the regretful paths taken, it always leads to the present. There was no changing that.
But, it did not mean that he couldn't have hope for the present. With eyes lit up, he scanned through the contact information on his phone. Swiping through all his pack members' phone numbers, he landed on the one he needed.
Aki Nakamura.
With newfound energy, he typed up a message.
"Aki, pull up information on every woman with the first name Kagome currently working at the company listed below. Thanks"
With an exhausted yawn, he allowed himself a small bit of praise. He had done it.
Taken a crazy leap of faith.
Now, he just needed to prepare for the fall.
