Reflection
Dear readers,
Thank you for stopping by and reading my story. I am very thankful for all the support this fanfiction is getting. Thank you so much! All the kudos and comments make my heart jump every single time!
The last chapter was extremely emotionally-loaded. I am sorry for making you all cry. And, the cat is finally out of the bag. Yes, Kisshu is not single in this story. You might wanna ask why? Well, I read a lot of post-arc fics about my favorite pairing and, in most of these stories, Kisshu never seems to have any kind of commitment to anyone. There are always fangirls or family involved, but never actually anything close to a relationship/ girlfriend/wife/children. And that got me thinking into carving my own niche in this fandom, which is basically how The Road to Perfection came to life. If you know any other stories that deal with such problematics, please do let me know, I would love to read it!
DrDark7 – Thank you for your comment! I totally understand your feelings. In my mind, Kisshu always belongs with Ichigo. I have no idea why the canon does not follow this line of pairing. It has always made me so sad and frustrated.
RedArzenic – Thank you for your comment! I am thrilled to hear that you have been enjoying reading my story. That makes me super happy! And I am terribly sorry that I made you feel heartbroken. There is a lot more drama to come, but this chapter should not bring any more tears. Fingers crossed!
LenaCastle - Thank you for your comment! Yes, Kisshu is in a relationship in this story, which might seem somewhat unexpected, especially after the last chapter, but it will all make sense in the end, I promise!
NeKoGirl – Thank you for your comment! I am so sorry that I made you sad. I hope this following chapter will cheer you up a little!
Kishlover985 – Thank you for your comment! Yes, Kisshu having a girlfriend is a shocker. And that is so exciting to hear! I have not yet written anything while listening to MCR. But I think that their new song The Foundations of Decay would fit the last chapter perfectly!
As always, please enjoy and review!
I do not own Tokyo Mew Mew
It took a while for Ichigo to navigate her way amid the white stainless corridors with her vision partially blurred by her tears, but, miraculously, she managed to find Pai's lab with far less complications than she had anticipated. She could only hope that Ryou had not been lying when he had earlier informed them about his pre-planned workaholism. Ichigo was now extremely grateful for that geeky personality of his and she swore internally that she would never tease her boss about his hobby ever again. Unless he really asked for it, at least.
Taking a deep breath, she raised her hand in the air and knocked softly on the robust metallic door.
There was, of course, still the chance that Pai was in there with Ryou, but Ichigo squished that fearful thought in an instant. If that was the case, she would simply leave because Pai's presence would make it impossible for Ichigo to pour out her true feelings; not to mention that Pai was Kisshu's brother and he would most surely notify the green haired alien about her level of distress; with zero compassion in his voice, as she could perfectly imagine.
The Mew Mew leader waited a little longer and just when she was about to knock again, the door suddenly pushed open and she was met with a surprised pair of icy blue eyes. Scanning her form, that surprise soon turned into a scowl, however.
"What do you want, Ichigo?" Ryou asked, crossing his arms over his chest in evident discontent.
"I-I just couldn't sleep," she lied, hoping that he would not kick her out with such a blatant lie.
"With your normal clothes still on?" he cocked one quizzical brow at her and Ichigo down cast her vision in shame.
"It's Kisshu, Ryou," she muttered in a low voice in the event that Pai really was in the room as well, "He met with me tonight and-"
"And what?" Ryou cut her off briskly before she could even finish her sentence.
"I just need you to hear me out," Ichigo raised her gaze to his, tears already welling up in her eyes.
Ryou let out a languished sigh. He was powerless to Ichigo's tears. Not to her whining, nor to her complaining and definitely not to her slacking around. But when she cried those real tears of sorrow that he could recognize with immediate accuracy, there was something holding him back to be an emotionless jerk to her. He was fully aware of this intricate weakness on his part and he knew that he had better learn how to do something about it, quick. But first things first.
Stepping aside, he exhaled sharply and held the door wide open for her to walk through.
"But, Ryou! He is in a relationship with someone else," Ichigo screamed, not comprehending how her boss could be so casual about her predicament, "how could I possibly start something with him, knowing that?!"
They were still in Pai's lab. Luckily, the purple haired alien was nowhere in sight which put Ichigo instantly at ease. As she was drinking another cup of coffee, she let her mind briefly wonder why men and women thought so completely differently. No matter how hard she had tried to explain her viewpoint, Ryou was merciless with his judgement. She knew he had meant it in a good way, but his signature bluntness was not much appreciated at the current state of affairs.
"And? So were you when you threw yourself at me," he deadpanned, honest as ever.
Then it clicked. Ichigo had done it already in the past. During the period of her life, when she had dated Masaya.
Time flies, she mused internally.
It felt so long ago since she had actually done that and now that Ryou had brought it up, she allowed her thoughts to explore her memories once again. As the little shreds of her romantic love life flashed in front of her, Ichigo set her jaw, realizing that the blonde was right. She could play no angel here. As a cheat herself, she had no place to argue.
"I just…I don't think it's right," Ichigo mumbled, her voice finally calm and her initial frustration dissipating.
Ryou gave her a long pensive stare and, recollecting Kisshu's facial expression from only a couple hours ago, he figured there might be far more than meets the eye.
"I see. You truly love him," Ichigo jerked backwards and fell off of the chair, her jaw going slack.
"WHAAT?! Who said anything about love, Ryou?" she shrieked at the preposterous suggestion. Was he insane?
Ryou put his arms nonchalantly behind his head, as he reclined in his seat, protruding his legs on the now empty chair that Ichigo had been occupying just a minute ago. Closing his eyes, he let out a small laugh.
"It is quite ironic, really. After all the times he was practically stalking you and begging you to love him, you choose the most inconvenient moment for him to double check his feelings for you. And you call me cruel."
Ichigo gasped, completely unable to form a comeback. It took another silent second or two before she finally found her voice again and let her emotional outburst explode all out.
"It's not like that! I don't even know if I love him! And I did not plan anything! It just sorta happened. And now I can't stop thinking about him! I see him everywhere! Even at the places where I know for sure he cannot be! And don't even get me started on the dreams! It drives me nuts, Ryou!" she lamented in desperation but her boss stayed adamant.
"Ichigo, I listened to enough of your love life crap already. If you love him, tell him. If you don't, back off from his life. For good. It is that simple. But don't expect other people to solve your problems for you."
Ichigo's eyes slightly widened at his words, as Mint's reproachful voice reverberated in her head.
I'm not here to tell you what to do, Ichigo. You should figure it out by yourself.
But how could she possibly do that? This situation was completely out of her hands. Wasn't this the prime example of the time when to turn to her friends? That was what true friendship was for, or no?
"But-But," Ichigo quickly scrambled back onto her feet, when she saw Ryou got up from his chair with the intention of leaving.
"I'm outta here," he started walking away with his hands still behind his head, ignoring her drama.
"Noooooooo, Ryou! You can't leave me like this! Come onnnnn," she whined, storming after him.
"Watch me," the male bit back.
When Ichigo crossed his path, nevertheless, Ryou stopped in his tracks and put a warm hand on her hair unexpectedly.
"You do not need to make that decision immediately, Ichigo. Sleep on it and listen to your heart," detecting the sincere gratitude in her eyes, he took it as a sign to say good night and return to his normal self. Ichigo could only marvel at how swiftly the soft expression on Ryou's face suddenly morphed into that of an evil grin, as he playfully lifted his fingers and tapped her nose just like he had done in the old times.
"Don't mess up!"
Regardless of her outward angry reaction, Ichigo was extremely thankful for Ryou's support on the inside. That sweet little gesture strongly reminded her of their very first meeting and the sense of nostalgia of how far their friendship harked back greatly touched her. She knew that there was a lot of compassion and sympathy behind Ryou's harsh words. Despite his cold flat tone, Ichigo could easily decipher his genuine kindness.
"Eeh, don't you think it's kinda…too much?" Ichigo regarded herself in the mirror, kind of bashful about the way the pink dress draped around her body and her dissatisfying feelings that revolved around it.
Without doubt, she looked pretty and sexy. Still, with the sweetheart neckline and the long leg slit up her left thigh, she felt like she was displaying a little too much a little too easily.
You don't want to look cheap, Ichigo! Let him know that you are a lady!
"I wore a similar dress to my last TV host show," Zakuro noted, catching Ichigo's attention and confusing her even further.
"Yes, Zakuro, but our bodies are a little different," Ichigo exhaled, eying her reflection in discomfort.
"You look great, Ichigo," Lettuce agreed, when she stepped inside the room, looking nothing short of goddess. With her green hair down and a light blue v neck dress on, she was simply spectacular.
"Oh my God," Ichigo beamed, taking Lettuce all in, "you look amazing yourself, Lettuce!"
"Thank you," the bespectacled Mew blushed, as she tucked a nervous lock of green hair behind her ear.
With the upcoming welcoming ceremony round the corner, the girls had spent most of their afternoon by prepping themselves, joking and hanging out in Zakuro's room. Last time they had had so much fun together was probably during the sleep over at Mint's mansion, or when they had been plotting revenge on Ryou for making them work overtime again. Speaking of her boss, Ichigo was not certain whether or not Cyclonia had any dress code for the event, but Ryou had decided to play it by ear and instructed everyone to dress up nicely. For a tantalizing second, Ichigo perceived this as a great opportunity for getting back at the blonde. She could only imagine the expression on his face if she had the audacity to go against his wishes and emerge in some sort of sweatpants and a tank top, riling him up instantly. But Ryou had been a real sweetheart to her last night so she ditched the idea altogether and opted for a more formal look instead.
"Let me put a bit more blush on you, come here," Mint beckoned Lettuce with her free hand to join her and the finless porpoise Mew listened obediently.
Mint herself looked like nobility. In her dark royal blue frilly tea-length dress, she gathered the impression of refinement, luxury and grace, all the while looking her best. The same could be said about Zakuro, whose body con golden gown shone brightly from the distance. Pudding also stood out with her orange halter dress. It was only Ichigo that found herself in a rather beautiful article of clothing and yet feeling that she could not do the clothes real justice.
"What's the problem, Big sis Ichigo, na no da?" Pudding asked, sensing the dejection in Ichigo's face.
"I just don't know if I can go through with this, Pudding," Ichigo sighed, readjusting her cleavage for what must have been the tenth time already.
"Did Kisshu say something to you yesterday? Your confidence is non-existent," Mint fixed her with a cool stare.
"Not really, he just informed me that he has a girlfriend," Ichigo tried to put as little emphasis on her words as she could, while she grappled with her straps some more; to no avail, as they still kept peeking out of her dress, to her chagrin, "and that we should keep some distance between us."
"WHAT?!" everyone gasped in unison, startling the Mew Mew leader in the process.
Finally the bra seemed to have been securely tugged underneath the dress.
Bingo!
"What is so weird about that? He is not unattractive, you know. I bet there are many girls wanting him with being the hero and all that," Ichigo said, turning around and sending everyone a puzzled look. But from the reactions on their faces, their features mirrored the same internal conflict that Ichigo had been grappling with since yesterday. If not bigger.
In truth, Ichigo was devastated by the news that Kisshu was no longer single but she came to the conclusion that she could not expect him to put his life on hold for her. All the more knowing that the possibility of the two of them meeting again had seemed so dwindling for so long. Or, more specifically, until last week. But, against all odds, here she was, on his planet, with her team by her side, trying to fit her body into a dress that definitely called for more endowed features and with only one goal in her mind: to get his attention and affection back. Or, that is what she had at least hoped for.
"Oh my god, why did you not tell us," Mint exclaimed, already on her feet, "in that case, we need something better, way better to make sure that your attire would make up for your apparent idiocy!"
"Yay, count me in, na no da," Pudding hopped and followed her partner in crime in the wink of an eye.
As she watched Mint and Pudding hurry to the closet, Lettuce cleared her throat.
"Ichigo, do you think that this is a good idea? You know, we don't want to cause any trouble here," the green haired Mew cautioned with a serious expression on her face.
"I don't know, Lettuce. But I know that every time I see him, I feel that there is some connection between us that I cannot simply put into words," Ichigo whispered out loud, as her eyes dazed with an indescribable quality that only a person deep in thought could reflect.
She had spent the whole night thinking about what to do about her unresolved feelings for Kisshu. The notion of pursuing a guy in a relationship still sounded so wrong to Ichigo, in spite of her own disputable moral barometers. But there was something else that infinitely scared her; that ineffable something beyond description that she could not exactly articulate but whose grasp held a relentless grip on her persona. Paradoxically, the harder she had thought about her situation, the more questions flitted to her mind; one more ridiculous than the other. What if the girl was with him only due to his newly-acquired hero status? Or, what if Kisshu was with that girl just to forget Ichigo? Was there any real love between them? Or were they together due to the same circumstances just like her and Masaya? What if he did not actually love her at all?
'And, you love him, Ichigo?' her mind scoffed, making her internally facepalm.
She was definitely not ready to ask, nor answer any such difficult questions at the moment. On one hand, she was sure that she was feeling some emotion towards Kisshu. But was it love? She could not tell yet. There was, obviously, one very effective way to find out. Ichigo was positive that if their lips met, she would know for sure. It was only a matter of one kiss and a bit of talking. She wanted to know if his feelings for her had truly changed.
Ichigo had been completely absorbed in her melancholic train of thoughts but Zakuro's sharp voice soon brought her back to the room.
"Keep in mind that he is from a different culture, Ichigo, so he might look naturally appealing to you also due to that and the fact that we are on vacation and you are in a search of a rebound," the eldest Mew concluded, leaving Ichigo's mouth agape.
"I-I am not looking for a…re-rebound, Zakuro!" Ichigo flushed, too embarrassed to even repeat the word. Zakuro, on the other hand, did not display any such remorse.
"All I am saying is, think twice before you start to toy with someone else's emotions. You might get burned."
Ichigo swallowed loudly and was about ready to give it all a second thought when Mint and Pudding reappeared in front of her with a new dress in their hands. The first thing that hit Ichigo big time was how intense its color was. Deep scarlet red, full of passion and confidence, which the Mew Mew leader was presently so vehemently lacking.
The style of the dress was likewise undeniably beautiful, stunning even. Revealing, yes, but very elegant, far more elegant than the previous one that she still had on. Ichigo traced the silk material of the strapless mermaid dress with her fingers and cherished the soft feeling it left on her skin.
"This is exactly what you need, Ichigo," Mint sent her a wink, smirking wildly, "girlfriend or not, let him suffer a little."
"Yea, suffer, na no da," Pudding joined in cheerfully and Ichigo shot them both an amused grin.
Glancing at Zakuro and Lettuce, she noticed that both of the remaining Mews broke into content smiles as well.
"Let me do something about your hair, this hairstyle does not go well with the red dress," Zakuro pointed out, as she made the Mew Mew leader sit on a stool and began working her magic on her auburn tresses.
Ichigo's heart clenched at the feeling of how incredibly lucky she was. In love or no, with boyfriend or not, she had the most generous friends in the world, supporting her in whatever folly. Even in such a stupid plan like to win Kisshu back. But was this enough? An itching worry began to bite at the back of her mind, as more questions bubbled to the surface.
What would happen when they collided again? Would she act silly? Until now, Ichigo had no idea why she could not tell him anything yesterday. Had he really shocked her into silence with his earlier proclamation? And was it not too late now? Why did she not react differently? Why did she evade him and put on a brave face instead of really telling him how she had felt? Did he know? Because all her friends could instantly tell what was going on in her head. Why did she go running after Ryou in the middle of the night instead of running after Kisshu anyway? What the hell was she so nervous about? The worst case scenario was that he would just say no. Was it because he seemed to have matured so much? And if so, would he have told her sincerely how he felt about her, should she have asked last night? Something told Ichigo that he would. He died for her once for God's sake! That must have meant something, right? If only she had allowed for a little more detachment from the situation yesterday, she could tell him with ease that she cared about him. Deeply. And, perhaps, in a completely different way than she had had in the past.
Ichigo drew a long breath through her nose and plucked up her courage.
She was not going to go down without a fight. She would confront him tonight, yes. She would take him aside and tell him everything before she would plant her lips on his and kiss him passionately. And then she would know for certain.
He had fallen for her once; she could make him fall for her again.
Ichigo looked at the girl in the mirror that was staring back at her with sparkling eyes, and she knew that her self-assurance had been restored.
Tonight is the night.
