*Chapter 148*
"User, your mom is SO COOL!" Kepa erupted through the lighthouse front door, Gideon strolled in after her and politely shut and locked it behind himself.
Kepa cutely whirled around, the flouncy black blouse she wore, paired with a nice pair of pants, glistened with the nicer, shimmery fabric underneath the kitchen's overhead lights. After the art show guests had left, Gideon and Kepa, as well as a handful of other students, artists and Murphy, hung back to help break down and toast to a successful event. A few hours had passed since they had departed from Vanellope, Koko, Nox, Lash and Mara, and it was now Gideon's time to hopefully embark on a magical night he had been anticipating for a few weeks now. Gideon smiled and admired Kepa's beauty, his meticulously planned evening was now fervently listed in the forefront of his mind, the few gifts he had planned for Kepa, the task of officially lighting the light house's lamp, all daintily dolloped with their very first exchanges of 'I love you's, Gideon felt his heart begin to thud straight out of his chest. It was here did he feel entirely taken aback by his own feelings, the very idea that if everything all played out correctly, he dared to feel as if he'd be ready to fully swap codes with the beauty stood before him, if she would have him.
"She's pretty awesome," Gideon mused warmly, his narrowed, lovely golden gaze held to hers in enchanted wonder as he pressed closer to her, Kepa inhaled a breath and freely giggled as she gripped Gideon's bigger hands, upon him slowly melting into her gravity, "She already loves the crap out of you, I can tell."
"AND she gave me her number," Kepa sighed with a slump of her shoulders in full relief, she shook her head and so lovingly peered up into Gideon's eyes, "It won't bring my mother back, but... I so appreciate you thinking of me, and allowing me to meet your mother. It means the world to me. Now, I can't wait to meet your father, what with the funny tales your mom had to say about him."
"My dad's grumpy, but if you thought I gave the best hugs?" Gideon grinned, looked off and lulled his eyes closed in cute pondering, "You just wait until you experience one of his bear hugs. Life changing."
"Really? Is he taller than you?" Kepa wondered, Gideon cocked an eyebrow and grinned.
"He's almost three feet taller than me," Gideon's deep voice cued, to which Kepa's ears sagged in a slope of whole entire surprise.
"H-He's nine feet tall?" Kepa staggered through a giggle, Gideon nodded and briefly looked up to the ceiling.
"You'll see," Gideon mumbled, he lovingly peered into Kepa's eyes and, although he had been rehearsing for this, for what felt like months, he desperately did what he could to keep all of his ducks in a row. With masculine, confident ease, he sagged his bigger hands to Kepa's hips, pulled her a bit closer to him, sighed and so gently fiddled with the ends of her shirt in musing, coy tease, "So, I had a few ideas of the things we could do, for tonight, Valentine's Day... Can I share with you?"
"Oh, sure," Kepa bobbed an eager nod and long-blinked in almost recoiling confusion, "I-I... I forgot that you said today was Valentine's Day, I still feel bad that I've never even heard of it before."
"No one at the castle celebrated?" Gideon patiently pondered as they caught eyes, Kepa shook her head in full confirming assuredness.
"No, not at all, I wouldn't have even known what you were talking about, truth be told," Kepa sighed, "I figured we'd part ways, after your art show. I had no clue tonight was supposed to be a big deal for couples, but... I mean, hey! I'm all about a date night, what did you have in mind?"
"Well, a few things," Gideon stated lowly, he now felt a small little poke at the back of his brain, one that almost began to express worry, as if maybe he could potentially be blindsiding her in this whole avenue of a celebration she was totally without, for her entire life. Gideon shook the thought away, he felt confident of his findings, he felt sure that this night was to be incredibly special and they were due to falling into each other like the last, flickering explosions of dying stars before morphing into one giant supernova of romance that would melt the night away. Eager to bear all and be vulnerable, he could feel his hands begin to shake a little, something he couldn't hide, "I, um... Well, I have a few gifts prepared for you, I can manifest them for you."
"Y-You got me gifts, Gideon?" Kepa mused so sweetly, she tilted her head in caring adoration and beamed him a grateful smile, "Giddy, you didn't have to do that, I-I had no idea about this holiday, or else I would've gotten you something..."
"You don't need to give me anything, I'm just happy we're together," Gideon hummed patiently with a loving smile, "All I need is right before me..."
"You too, Gideon," Kepa sagged and began to show signs of melting, romantic disbelief, as if she was floored to be basking in Gideon's caring words. She warmly pet the center of his chest and gave him her full attention, now certain of the gravity of his words. She steadied herself and watched as he shakily inhaled a breath and looked to be contemplating something, "Did you have anything specific planned for tonight? Or did you want to just light a few candles, maybe pop some popcorn, watch a movie? I-It might be too cold for a walk on the beach, but..."
"I would love to do that, but... One of the main things I wanted to do with you, was to officially light the lighthouse's lamp, once and for all," Gideon's deep voice eased, though the rasp at the back of his throat caused for cued, trembling nervousness, something Kepa was definitely cued to.
"Ohh, wonderful idea," Kepa whispered sweetly, her beautiful ears perked up, she shyly flattened her whiskers and pursed her lips in sweet pondering as her big, dilated pupils peered like glassy balls of black deep into Gideon's eyes, "Maybe I can use my fire breathing..."
"That was exactly my idea," Gideon whispered in return as they hung close, though just as Kepa was due to bouncing away from Gideon and excitedly racing him up the lighthouse spire, she flexed her core and resisted the urge to twirl away and rouse into playful banter. She firmly peered into Gideon's eyes and felt a switch up happen, he peered to her with such romantic fervor, his hands shook a little, his disposition was honest and true, and it was here did Kepa feel every single organ in her body clench with a hit of terrified realization. She held her breath and suddenly understood Gideon was on the brink of an incredibly important switch in gears, an incredibly important milestone in their relationship, and it was here did Kepa almost sag in on herself and wonder just how the hell she could carry through this conversation with grace and fragility. Gideon inhaled a steady breath and gingerly gripped Kepa's hands, he opened his mouth and narrowed his gaze for tender emphasis, "Before we do any of this, though, I have to tell you something... I want to move forward in this, with you, on the same page."
"Yeah?" Kepa wondered gently, though she felt her throat close with the second Gideon bravely inhaled a breath, looked her deep in the eye and huffed her a loving, confident press of words she was equally desperate to hear and desperate to avoid.
"I love you," Gideon's sweet, deep voice ushered her with all of the care in the world, he eased a shy, handsome smile and held the happiest eye contact with her, eager to see her little chest rise with an equally as readied inhale, though as far more than ten seconds drifted on, Gideon felt the world drum to a moaning, creaking halt of full, harrowing dread.
Gideon raised his eyebrows in a slow swing of seeing the universe about him lift from the rosy tint he had been coat in this whole time, it all sagged to a very dreaded, foggy blue. He could feel Kepa's hands grip his in what now was very blatant, desperate apology, he held his breath and felt his teeth clench in full, unadulterated terror, he had laid everything on the line, in this instance, and was now face to face with a very cold instance he was entirely certain wouldn't ever be a scenario in his world. A full sixty seconds had gone by and Kepa's lack of any sort of a reply had his heart thudding slower and slower, the gentle grip of a final death kiss began to coat his heart black, he sagged his shoulders in frozen, dreaded realization and could see an equal amount of terror in Kepa's eyes. She firmly peered up to him in the full, concealed, sorrowful grimace of entire apology, she felt her heart race with a billion different positive and negative dialogue options to give Gideon. One was a sure-fire, one way ticket to fully molting, though the other was devastation to Gideon's already devastated heart. She panicked, it was clear by the way her breathing was now turning into nervous panting through her nose. Gideon narrowed his gaze in sticky disbelief and faltered a breath of shocked terror as they hovered in their now cold bubble of confusion.
"Y-You... Don't feel the same," Gideon's voice shook, he long-blinked in full disbelief and grimaced, "You really... Really don't...?"
"N-No, Gideon, it's..." Kepa staggered on her words, they both allowed trembling scoffs of faltered statements leave their figures, though as Gideon took a nervous step backward, Kepa began to hurriedly panic, "I-It's not you, I DO feel the same, I just-"
"Can't say it?" Gideon prod, he narrowed his gaze and now began to look fervently protective of himself, Kepa began to panic further.
"It's not you, truly, I can't like... Fully explain it to you, because," Kepa stumbled on her words, her voice was high, rushed and wavering, she peered her desperate eyes to Gideon's now darkened, harrowing golden gaze and curled her tail about her legs in an equal show of rising terror, "Please hear me, Gideon, this is just... SO much, all at once, I just need time to digest all of this."
"If you need time to think about if you love me, or not, then..." Gideon furrowed his brow in a sting of tears that wanted to form, he did absolutely everything in his power to not show weakness, to exclude her from any show of vulnerability she was used to seeing, he gave her a mean-mug of deteriorating trust and shook his head, "This... W-We've been together for months, we've already been through so much. I-I taught you how to fly, you showed me deeper intimacy, w-we even talked about having babies together, for User's sake."
"Gideon, it's NOT you, it's-"
"Oh, it's not you, it's me, that trope is so old and so full of bullshit," Gideon growled, he allowed his hurt to mask any and all forms of judgement, though with said stab of his hurt, he flinched and began to backtrack due to the sudden, angry pin of Kepa's ears to her skull.
"If you would LISTEN to what I have to say instead of just assuming I don't feel the same, or WORSE, that I'm just trying to pacify you!" Kepa shouted as she clenched her fists and shook her head.
"I-I can feel it from you, I can sense your confusion," Gideon staggered in reserved, stiffening sorrow, "You don't need to say anything, Kepa... I get it."
"Gideon, PLEASE listen to me," Kepa begged in a rile of frustrated anger, her tail began to poof at the tip in a fuller show of agitation, "Look... Today's been a HUGE day for me. Not only did I meet your mother, I also was blindsided by this whole... Valentine's Day talk. I had NO clue you were planning something so special, I had no clue you were planning on confessing to me, like this..."
"What, am I supposed to ask your permission before I tell you how I feel about you?" Gideon loudly argued, Kepa pinned her ears so tight to her skull, they nearly weren't visible.
"I think a little heads-up about a heavy conversation coming my way might've been nice!" Kepa yelled back, claws drawn, pupils in tight cross-hairs, she bared her fangs in fuller frustration the second Gideon began to take a few steps towards the door. How desperately she wanted to put her weapons away and urgently encourage Gideon to come back, she shook her head and flagged her arm at him, "And now you're just gunna RUN away from everything!"
"Yeah, I am," Gideon muttered sorrowfully, he looked back at her and shook his head, "You can have all the time you need, to think... I'm really sorry, Kepa."
"Sure, just leave without solving anything, it's what you're best at," Kepa meanly snipped in the heat of their argument, though the words hit Gideon's heart like a stab of jagged ice, the last words he had heard escape Tessa's figure not a few weeks back.
Gideon grimaced through the pain, squeezed his eyes shut, yanked the lighthouse door open and left with a hefty slam behind him. Kepa exhaled a hard cry out to the room and covered her face in full, apologetic sorrow. She grit her fangs, grappled the hair on the crown of her head and quietly cried in the shake of anger and confusion that coursed her. Although she was desperate to keep all of her ducks in a row, to allow her molt to come along in such a way where she deemed emotionally ready, she felt the instant kick of regret kick her in the gut. With a lift of her teary eyes, she inhaled a trembling cry and urgently rushed the door. With a firm yank and a toss of herself out into the sand, she allowed her night vision to scan the darkened forest far beyond the breadth of the lighthouse's perimeter.
"Gideon!" Kepa loudly droned on as she cupped her hands over her mouth for emphasis. She shivered and urgently peered into the forest, though Gideon was absolutely nowhere to be found. Her teeth chattered, her tears streamed her cheeks in slow licks of ice, she cupped her mouth, once more, and wailed out to the forest beyond her, "GIDEON!"
The forest echoed his name, the wind carried it as far as it could, though without a single trace left, Gideon had vanished into the black, the trail of his footprints were slowly being blown away by the ocean's icy, unforgiving winds. Kepa hugged her arms about her body and allowed regret to sit with her, she violently shivered and understood that the journey to normality, between the two, was now a very long, winding, harrowing road she was stood right at the mouth of. Coldness embraced her, she shook her head and allowed her icy tears to sit on her face, she desperately peered to the tree line and, although she pleadingly envisioned Gideon circling back to help fix this mess, the sky stared down at her lonely figure in the sand, cold with permanent regret.
Gideon firmly plowed into Vanellope's and Ralph's home, and with a hinge-tearing thud, he aggressively slammed the door shut with a harrowing boom that rattled the whole house. He clenched his teeth, grappled his hands into fists, pounded in pacing aggressiveness through the foyer and felt as if he was absolutely certain he could breathe fire. His eyes angrily glossed his home, it was dark and void of life, Gideon's mind began to race about the beautiful night that could've been, the beautiful night every person around him was experiencing, excluding him. Through the fog of anger, he took note that his phone had been vibrating. He yanked it from his pocket and noted that he had a handful of missed calls from Kepa, though as yet another one came in, he glowered her name down, ignored the call with a press and began to fervently thumb for someone to reach for, someone to keep him from doing dastardly deeds, he narrowed his gaze and felt his purple coding nervously glitch about in the fit of becoming unhinged with anger. He desperately tried to reign it in, desperately allowed his thumbs to pen to Callum's name, in his phone. He quickly began to call Callum, he held his phone to his ear and paced the front foyer. The phone rang five times before going to Callum's voicemail, to which Gideon yanked the phone away from his head and aggressively yelled down into it.
"The ONE time you don't fucking pick up your phone! You're not even doing anything for Valentine's Day, where the fuck are you!" Gideon heavily shouted as he ended the call before it could properly roll all the way to Callum's voicemail box.
Gideon nervously began to panic as the tantalizing reminder gently continued to poke his brain, the haunting ideas he had ushered Callum not a week back, the raw fact that he was now entirely blindsided by the curveball life had just thrown him. The one, harrowing thing he was certain would absolutely never happen was now a situation he was deep inside of, the raw idea that the only thing keep Gideon's feet to Litwak's Arcade was Kepa's love. He grimaced a soft noise of grief, rubbed his face in full agitation and now felt as if he was grasping at straws. Eager to find at least someone that would be willing to hear his cries, someone that was willing to fill in for Kepa and keep his feet from touching the fire, he welled up with huge tears and audibly uttered a hard sigh of full, defeated frustration as he began to call Tessa. He grit his teeth and shook his head, he wondered if getting this upset and worked up was genuinely his heart telling him to do what he felt was right, or full overreaction. He figured reaching out to at least someone was a good way to determine whether or not he had gone insane or not, a good way to keep him from doing the one thing he said he'd do in this situation, he squeezed his eyes through the spill of tears as Tessa's call rolled to voicemail, as well.
Gideon heaved a trembling sigh and began to nervously mosey on towards his childhood bedroom. His thumb clumsily pawed for his mother's contact information, he inhaled a tight sniffle and rounded into his bedroom, he squeezed his eyes shut, once more, as he cued a phone call with Vanellope. He shook his head and whispered that she was his last life line, he stood in his dark, still bedroom and felt the constant ringing of her phone call pierce his brain with each ring, and by the time the fifth ring came about, Gideon lulled his arm to his side in a slow swoop of defeat the second her call also rolled to voicemail. Alone in this still space he once called home, he inhaled a tight breath through his nose and felt his heart harden in the swing of now full isolation. He exhaled a long, trembling sigh through his nose, turned on his nightstand's lamp, set his phone down on it, for good, and cautiously cued his purple coding. The secretive inventory space that Lash had so cleverly came up with flickered before him, his eyes scanned to the one item he hadn't touched since his lonely Pre-Academy days.
With a nervous reach of his trembling hands, he gripped the coding of his Game Over application and brought it to a tangible read in his grip, and as his inventory zipped away, Gideon manifested a pen and huffed an audible, trembling breath of full, doomed desperation out into the room. With a few quick, clumsy swipes of checked boxes, reason's given, coded information and the clumsy explanation of his powers, he flipped the pages over and firmly signed the bottom of the application with his signature, finalized and ready to go. With one final glance to his phone on his nightstand, he grimaced a small huff of regret he could already feel kiss his coded soul goodbye, and as he rounded out of his bedroom one last time, he pressed into the kitchen and pawed for the pad of paper Vanellope kept on the kitchen island. A short, sorrowful love note signed with bittersweetness, Gideon shoved his folded application papers into his pocket, manifested himself a proper, protective coat that no one had ever seen him wear before, and cautiously left his childhood home for the last time. With a clack of the front door, and a vanish into the abyss without a single way of being contacted, he left Sugar Rush, Litwak's Arcade, everything he had ever known and loved, without a single trace.
