Reviews :
Snake557 : You're on to something there haha. Unfortunately for Ora, she has awful dexterity and can only manage simple circle suns, as shown in this chapter. Never fear! She eventually gets through to him :) User, I think... It's actually coming up, y'guys are finally getting to juicy bits.
Song Listened To :
My Whole Life for This by CHPTRS
So Heavy I Fell Through the Earth (Nightcore version) by Grimes
*Chapter 167*
Routinely becoming second nature, Gideon lazily sunk his half-gone cigarette into his mouth, took a thick inhale and thrusted said cigarette in a temporary rest in the ash tray nearest him. He narrowed his gaze and firmly concentrated on the task in front of him. Although he once felt this to be an odd, winding path of life he had found himself down, he long-blinked in concentration and no longer felt it precarious that he was now the fuel behind the tattoo gun. Jukkit laid still in a lazy front-flop on his own tattoo bed, Gideon's skillful work had carried on for the last forty-five minutes or so. Due to the gorgeous splay of work that Jukkit had crowned Gideon's entire backside with, from skull to heels, Gideon had used this time to apprentice underneath Jukkit and learn a thing or two about tattooing traditionally, as opposed to the blast-method Jukkit had tortured Gideon with upon his arrival. Gideon fluttered his eyes and finally allowed his hefty rib cage to collapse in on itself in a slow sag, hot smoke sprawled from his nostrils as he tenderly carried on with the artwork on Jukkit's back, a masterpiece the two had been collaborating on for the past two weeks or so.
"Big light," Ora murmured plainly, she sat nearly on top of Gideon on a shorter stool right in his lean. Gideon had manifested her a small notebook and a pencil so she could doodle as well, though Gideon cocked an eyebrow and subtly glanced down to her chore and took note that her gangly fingers were desperately trying to decode said 'big light' nonsense she has yet to let go of.
"Big light," Gideon muttered cutely through a snort of a chuckle as he gently continued to feather the tattoo gun in the shading on Jukkit's piece.
"What?" Jukkit wondered, the music in his warehouse was loud and fun, though low enough to where the three could hear each other converse if they talked loud enough.
"Ora," Gideon concluded lazily, it was all she ever could talk about, it was all she was fixated on lately, so much so that the group was now numb to it, and even so much as just saying Ora's name was enough for Jukkit to understand what Ora was on about.
"Tall spiral," Ora stated quietly, almost as if she was now talking to herself, she furrowed her brow and sweetly rested the notepad on Gideon's lower thigh and continued to struggle with holding the pencil Gideon had given her, she did work to draw millions of little circles with rays coming out of it. Gideon deciphered these as little suns, it was clear she was trying, though the notebook was now a haphazard splay of messy suns and nearly nothing more.
"Mhmm?" Gideon's deep voice croaked, he gently readjusted his arm, so to lovingly adhere to Ora's tight proximity and allow her the comfortability to exist in her's and Jukkit's close presence, though Gideon flinched as Jukkit finally groaned a noise of defiance.
"Near the ribcage fucking sucks, man," Jukkit grunted loudly, to which Gideon grinned and nodded; although blasted all at once, like a printer throws ink on paper, he still grimaced and understood that certain points on his tattooed body remained far more tender than other areas.
"I know, man, half way done with this side," Gideon assured as he took his paper towel and gently wiped blood and ink away, though he tucked his dwindling cigarette into his lips and now kept it there as he narrowed his concentrative gaze, leaned in and skillfully continued on.
The design Gideon and Jukkit had come up with was an intense, gorgeous piece that centered around Jukkit's home. A wild, alien landscape that contained the rather tongue-in-cheek display of a UFO abducting a cow. Although comical, Gideon treated the tattoo gun as if it were a digital pen, he pumped his coding full of artistic goodness through it and simply manifested any single color he could dream up, which left Jukkit's back piece looking like a digital reality you could just step into. The vivid kiss of Gideon's skill all coupled with his new ability, in tattooing, he inhaled a deep suck of his cigarette and was floored to have this outlet, surrounded by the people who marinated in his presence, didn't question his motives, never once wondered why he went quiet or got suddenly loud, it was here did Gideon dare to let a sneaky smile grip the cigarette in his mouth. The feeling of full acceptance, from every single little being he was in cahoots with, was what fueled him, each stroke to Jukkit's skin was powered on by the fire inside of him, no matter where his feet may have led him. He finally exhaled said huge inhale of smoke through his nostrils, once more, and only finally felt his spine begin to un-tense. Gideon gently glanced down to Ora, once more, and took note that she had begun so cutely humming along to the loud music being played, though it took his brain a second to realize just what music was being played; Archived Chaos's new album.
"Y'heard this song before, Gid?" Jukkit wondered as Ora cutely mumbled, though it was words laced with the notion of sunlight and tall spirals, like usual.
Gideon held his breath and felt his eyes tunnel-vision into the artwork he was skillfully laying to Jukkit's skin, though as the mere idea of Sugar Rush, Archived Chaos, everything his old life consisted of danced about in curious, baited wait, he braced for the sting of depression to slap him silly. Much to his surprise, his heart began to thud, though he sagged a little and allowed a few little memories to squeak by, due to the pain not being so fresh and new any longer. Gideon bobbed a nod and strangely eased a bittersweet, nostalgic little smile down to his chore as Ora's fumbling doodling continued on Gideon's lower thigh, near his knee.
"Yeah, the lead singer is my niece, if you can believe it," Gideon's voice grumbled, the words out of his mouth felt foreign.
"...Berri Black is your niece?!" Jukkit laid still, though his voice boomed in cackling shock as Gideon grinned, rolled his eyes and nodded, "The fuck, man, y'serious?"
"Dead serious," Gideon huffed gently, his nostalgic smile began to so gently sag into the dip of wanting to allow remorse finally hit him, head on, though he inhaled a refreshed breath and did what he did best; shoved it all under the rug.
"Their stuff is so underground, I'm glad it's finally made its way to the internet," Jukkit mumbled as Ora cutely began to tap her foot in time to the beat; although Gideon allowed Berri's beautiful voice to coat his soul in further remembrance, he somehow still skillfully kept all the emotions at bay, everything within him held any auditory, visual or any other sensual reminders so tightly secure behind an unbreakable barrier.
"Fire breath," Ora staggered with a nod as she finally managed to draw a cute little collection of stars, instead of suns, "Huge, tall light, it spins."
"Fire breath, that's new," Jukkit grunted a chuckle, though grimaced in pain as Gideon's even sweeps continued on.
"Was just gunna say," Gideon cutely eyed Ora, once more, and watched as she continued to haphazardly draw messy suns, now on the brink of needing to turn the page, once more.
"Dragon fire, father dragon," Ora bobbed a nod and cutely sagged her eyes up into Gideon's; with the perk in Ora's demeanor and the defeated sag of Gideon's, Ora huffed a tired sigh and equally sagged with him, she knew she'd eventually somehow get through to Gideon, though just when was what was beyond frustrating for her, even if both boys had no clue.
"What the hell, Ora," Jukkit erupted into heartier laughter as Gideon released his lean on Jukkit's body, insinuating he had lifted the tattoo gun and he was free to potentially take a break. Jukkit rolled over in a lurch and cautiously sat up as Gideon remained still for Ora, to which she continued to firmly doodle in her notepad on Gideon's thigh. Jukkit sighed and glanced between the two, "We should really try and decode this, sooner or later, my guy."
"I think it was just some vivid dream she maybe had that she can't drop, she's just trying to tell us what happened," Gideon stated through a gentle sigh, Berri's music continued to fall on his deaf ears, all of it so desperately banged on the back of Gideon's head in plea to finally be let in, to finally feel his feelings and allow regret to understand that he was a part of a grander strand of planetary bodies missing the sun they were previously orbiting, temporarily lost to dark space.
"Into light," Ora assured with a nod, her eyes seemed hopeful, she gingerly closed the notepad and, with the sweetest little shove of almost snarky, girly attitude, Ora pushed the closed pad into the center of Gideon's now-fuller chest. He grunted a little, wobbled, blurt a chuckle and readjusted his loose tank top, though as he took the notepad and peered into the normal gape of Ora's black pupils, she narrowed her gaze and continued on in shushed enchantment, "Future."
Gideon sighed through his nose and gently held the pad to his center, his eyes softened as his brain begin to wonder if Ora was specifically trying to give Gideon true information, though he grunted a chuckle as Ora firmly shoved the pad deeper into Gideon's chest, over his heart. He grinned and shook his head.
"Yes, yes, thank you, Ora, I'll study the ancient text," Gideon stated lovingly with a nod, "I'll read this tonight, I promise."
"Gotcha a bedtime story," Jukkit joked, "Full of sunlight. Something The Block doesn't have, maybe that's what she's wanting?"
"You're wanting sunlight?" Gideon asked Ora, though she stiffened, squeezed her eyes shut and fervently shook her head with a flag of her arms and hands, as if to express the simple idea that her involvement in any of this was out of the question. Gideon softened and uttered a cute laugh, "No, no sunlight."
"HUGE LIGHT!" Ora suddenly erupted in frustration, though much to Gideon and Jukkit's shock, she shot upwards in a stiff stand, causing the stool she was on to flop to the ground with a pang, and she urgently stormed out of Jukkit's workshop, leaving Gideon and Jukkit to themselves in the mocking sound that was Berri's beautiful singing voice.
"Damn, she's not going to drop this, is she," Jukkit worried, he peered to Gideon and furrowed his brow in collected, smiling curiosity, "You, uh... You think there's anyway you can manifest her like... The ability to properly convey just what she wants to convey?"
"I don't know, I guess I could think on it," Gideon rubbed his chin in gentle confusion and watched as Ora's figure finally stormed away for good, with the slam of Jukkit's big, metal workshop door.
"Seems important," Jukkit murmured.
In her lean, Kepa lulled her eyes in a long-blinked of silent relishing, the fact that her eyes weren't filled with tears, for once. The gentle, methodical swing of the lighthouse's beams cast so far into the black was the thing in her peripheral. The lamp spun slowly, easily, as if carefully scanning the universe's every single crevice for a shred of life, a grip of hope to hold onto, Kepa only barely lifted her eyes from her little sketchbook to admire its beam, Gideon's way home. She inhaled a deep breath and longingly peered to its gorgeous, tall, sturdy structure. She stood inside the arena's main common room's far balcony, one that looked down upon the courtyard from about two floors up, though still not tall enough to rival the lighthouse's impenetrable, beautiful beams. Alone on the darkened terrace, she could hear the group inside the common room's main gathering spot and kitchen area erupt into soft laughter. Such a noise had Kepa's ears perking in curiosity, although Sezeke had been successful in getting a giggle out of her figure every once in a blue moon, she heaved a long sigh through her nose and peered back to the doodles in her sketchbook in forlorn remembrance, the memories of full belly laughs she used to share with Gideon now felt ten lifetimes away.
Her sketchbook was filled with the repetitive splay of circles paired with sunbeams radiating off of it, adorable cartoon suns and little speckles of stars to cradle it all, her fingers couldn't afford anything else. Desperate for the light of her life to return, she continued on, the press of suns now rapidly filling her entire sketchbook. Said little book was nearly half full of the nonsense, and though a few other little doodles made its way into the book, somehow the repetitive drawing of these adorable circle-suns was soothing to her brain, a nice escape from harrowing, depressive thoughts that continued to hover close by, ready to drown her mood deeper into darkness. The few pages in the beginning of the sketchbook were warped with just how many tears it all saw, though as time went on, Kepa found it almost comforting that her body could no longer produce tears. Her stomach remained in a clench of permanent grief, barely allowing any shred of an appetite to exist, the unfortunate event of fur-picking was something that was now causing balding spots on the sides of her jugular, she was an anxious wreck, a new way of life she was desperate not to get comfortable in, though wondered if there was no other option.
Kepa perked her ears a bit higher and suddenly heard an unfamiliar voice inside the common room, though as she stood to correction and looked over her shoulder to source this new voice, she raised her eyebrows in a swing of the proverbial kick to her gut, the image of just who was inside the group of friends she had grown close to. Oliver stood with Vanellope and kindly began chit-chatting with Wren and Berri, though as Kepa's eyes fixated on Gideon's big brother, she felt her eyes very firmly remind her that said dry spell of tears was now due to ending. She held her breath and felt terror plague her, although Gideon wasn't nearly as tall or as bigger-built as Oliver, both men looked scarily alike, save for Oliver's messy, straight black hair. Kepa flattened her ears and glowered him down from the balcony, unbeknownst to him, and though she was fervently reminded that she wanted nothing to do with Tessa or Oliver, she finally allowed a hardened, becoming-aggressive glower to glue him in her cross-hairs, she clenched her fists and felt the urge to pick fights for no reason, the urge to somehow steamroll anyone who had previously hurt Gideon. She clenched her jaw and bravely slapped her sketchbook closed and began to saunter inside, a lift from the dead, revival to claim apologies in Gideon's name.
"Yeah, Tessa figured that like... Leaving it up, for now, would be best," Oliver's deep voice staggered, it was clear he was on the brink of tears though reigned it in nicely, "I don't think any of us have the heart to remove his art wall, though, the issue is, it's staring mom and dad in the face, every single day."
Vanellope sighed and looked off; her eyes were permanently stained red, she looked the sickest, the tiredest, her and Kepa combined had taken the hugest hit in this mess and it was painfully obvious due to their deteriorating physical health. Not wanting to speak on it, Vanellope simply looked off and lulled her exhausted eyes closed, a permanent frown was glued to her face. The second Mara gingerly cupped the back of Vanellope's upper arm was the second Vanellope squeezed her eyes shut tighter, just barely shook her head and couldn't keep her lip from quivering upon the promise of crumpling into tears. Oliver heaved a shaky sigh and glossed his eyes about the room; the people present were Mara, Wren, Berri, Turbo, Lash, Theo and Sezeke, which now included Oliver and Vanellope with Kepa as the secretive, incoming outlier.
"Tessa said preserving his wall, in the code room, is likely the best route once we're comfortable moving it," Oliver grumbled tiredly as he rubbed the back of his head, "I can't imagine mom and dad's positioning, it took every single ounce of my willpower to so much as walk up to it, today."
"Aw, was that the first time you'd ever seen it?" Kepa's voice cut the room in half with clarity, she stood in a proud stance with her arms crossed, and though her lazy lean to a nearby wall seemed nonchalant and easy going, Oliver raised his eyebrows and tossed his honey-brown gaze straight to Kepa's in a prickle of sorrowful stun.
"... N-No, it wasn't," Oliver staggered, he stiffened, rubbed the back of his head, glossed his eyes to Vanellope's and then everyone else in the room and was floored they crowned an equally as stunned look of uncertainty. He huffed a shaky falter of words before he peered hard into Kepa's eyes, the gut reaction to give her a challenging glower hung tight to his demeanor, though he first chose kindness. The full understanding that he was finally meeting Gideon's girlfriend was suddenly a lot to digest, especially with the fact that she was starting said introduction with claws out, "You must be Kepa, it's nice to finally meet you."
"Likewise," Kepa mused meanly, she gently sauntered closer, her lithe tail slithered behind her as she stepped, and though everyone was frozen in prickled curiosity, Sezeke was the first to remove himself from the surprised chokehold and sag his face into his hands in a show of pure dread for what was to come, "How often would you say you've visited the wall when Gideon was still here?"
"Um," Oliver swallowed hard and felt as if Kepa was suddenly backing him into a corner, the daggers in her eyes was obvious, and although she stopped half a dozen feet from Oliver's point on the grid, he still felt as if it was way too close. Her aura was dangerous, she looked ready to fight, the rumors of how she murdered Callum twice over circled the palace like a scary bedtime story no one could let go. He stiffened a little and furrowed his brow in a show of promised retaliation, lest she kept up the snide questions, "Probably hundreds of times-"
"You're lying through your teeth," Kepa hissed as her ears now fully flattened to her skull, causing Oliver to flinch in a show of softened sorrow, though as Vanellope covered her face and walked away, Oliver inhaled a readied breath and slowly clenched his fists; a beast that was slow to anger, though still a beast at the end of the day. Kepa eyed Oliver over in cocky delight and shrugged, "I know more about you guys than you'd probably like. I know how often, or how little, you guys so much as interacted with Gideon. Some balls to tell the whole class that visiting his art wall was difficult."
"You don't know me or the depth of my baby brother's relationship," Oliver's low voice finally growled, a tepid being so gentle and full of love now cast in Gideon's makeup, the same fervent glower Kepa often saw in Gideon, being no stranger to his life's frustrations.
"Really, now," Kepa whispered in smiling, mean delight, "Remember your birthday party? Gideon accidentally spoiled the surprise of Ralph's game day shirt and his mistake was the center of attention for the rest of the night."
"... It hardly was," Oliver gawked in frustration.
"You don't get to decide that," Kepa sharply retaliated, "Remember the times you'd abandon him in Arcadia Station after school let out?"
"I was currently enduring my wife's miscarriages," Oliver's voice grew in strength as his fists clenched a bit harder, he meanly glowered Kepa down and shook his head, "Not that it's any of your business."
"How many art shows has Gideon had over the course of his adulthood that you failed to attend?" Kepa rattled with a mean smile, "How many times did you sit down with him and ask him about the art inside of his being, just what it meant to him instead of telling him to sit down and shut up when maybe he became a bit too animated and loud inside telling a story?"
"I don't need to justify myself to you," Oliver's voice was deep and threatening, he clenched his fists and allowed his eyes to well with big tears of whole anger, and though the threat of his fists was obvious, Kepa dared to push into his bubble with pushback.
"I've managed to wrangle beasts twice your size, taking Callum out was cake, so go ahead and clench your hands harder until you start swinging and see what becomes of you," Kepa stated through core-shaking snarling as her tail grew stiff in a low hover of full agitation, she pointed a firm finger at Oliver's chest and allowed her cross-haired pupils to slice his soul in half, "Hate to break it to yah buddy but I'M currently the one you should be ass-kissing. I'm the one hit first in the wake of Gideon's absence, whether you assholes like to think it or not... The times Gideon has cried on my shoulder and spilled his grief about the emotional neglect you guys wreaked on his heart is more times than I can count."
Oliver panted through his nose and allowed Kepa's words to lay him in a grave. Although he definitely did want to start swinging, the wave of anger, inside the grieving process, was now what had his wrecking powers in a chokehold, though he trembled a breath and fervently peered down into Kepa's eyes in dreaded understanding and she sharply continued on.
"The shove you took to his face when explaining his imaginary friend to you, belittling his experiences with bullies at Academy, siding with Callum when he told you that Callum was a part of the problem? Making fun of him for getting easily distracted or wanting mental space to recharge his batteries?" Kepa's voice raised, to which Oliver's shoulders began to sag and the swing of anger was now quickly morphing into teary, depressive crumpling, "Just because you think Gideon's differences are weird doesn't make YOUR differences any less weird or abnormal. The fact that nearly EVERYONE in Gideon's life, palace-side, chose to put their hands up and take ten steps AWAY from Gideon is more than HALF the reason why he's GONE!"
Oliver long-blinked tears down his cheeks and nervously looked down to his feet in full dread, though he flinched the second Kepa stood to her full height and was closer to his eye-line, something he was growing wary over.
"And you have the BALLS to act like visiting his art wall is 'too difficult'?!" Kepa nearly screamed, she firmly gestured into her sternum in riled animation and flung her arm out and behind herself, to the gape of the common room's glass wall, a terrace that overlooked the gorgeous lighthouse spire far across the courtyard, "Y'just so happen to see lighthouses on that wall? Y'ever wonder what the fuck THAT could be all about?!"
"Kippa," Sezeke muttered nervously as he glanced between Oliver and Kepa, and though everyone remained frozen in shock, no one but Sezeke was brave enough to at least attempt to tame the fiery wildcat that Kepa was becoming.
"Don't you DARE act like this is even remotely hard for you! You don't even KNOW HIM!" Kepa now screamed at the top of her lungs, she stiffened her arms in clenched fists at her side as she unfurled her wings from her coding and sprawled them in full dominance, such that had Oliver nervously hanging his head and throwing in the towel, tears and all, "My mistake in this was only the icing on top of the shit-filled cake you and everyone else baked for Gideon! Had my mistake simply just been a heartbreak for Gideon, he would've waltzed back to the palace, called up his big brother and asked for relationship advice... Not basically attempt to commit suicide!"
"Kepa!" Sezeke's loud voice now ushered out to her, though she didn't miss a beat.
"The name's GIDEON!" Kepa firmly yelled back as she stabbed her eyes into her father's, though she viciously scanned the room, "This all happened because he didn't have a single last person to fall back on! Too late to apologize to him now, huh, we all MISSED our chance because we had our heads so firmly shoved up our asses. I'm the CLOSEST thing to Gideon y'all are ever gunna get, ever again... There's no one here that knows his heart better..."
"So, what now?" Oliver whimpered as tears gathered on his strong jaw, Kepa crossed her arms and gestured into her sternum.
"Apologize. GROVEL," Kepa growled, "What would you say to Gideon if he was standing RIGHT where I am? What would come out of your mouth?"
"I'm sorry," Oliver whimpered, he grimaced and silently erupted into tears as he covered his face and shook his head, "I failed you... We all did."
Kepa crossed her arms tighter and glared Oliver down through the tears that now began to form in her eyes.
"You're absolutely right... I let your unique differences come between us and I selfishly assumed it all to be your detriment," Oliver cried quietly, he inhaled a shaky breath and nervously looked about, but was at least relieved to see that he wasn't the only one that had silently come unglued with tears, "I... I didn't allow our brotherhood to expand because I was worried accepting your weirdness would also get me outcasted."
Kepa felt the urge to soften as the words rolling out of Oliver were honest and full of despair, he looked ruined; it was here did she understand that he hid grief extremely well, a vastly different experience from Gideon, a man who wore his heart right on his sleeve.
"I remember the day you were born," Oliver's voice crackled in teary whimpers, he coughed a cry of a noise and gripped the side of his head in full despair as his desperate eyes peered into Kepa's, "You were so tiny, and so adorable... I promised you, I promised..."
Oliver erupted into more silent coughs of cries as he firmly covered his face and took a side-step away; the rest of Gideon's relatives present were equally coming unglued in silent sorrow that held the whole of Arcadia in a chokehold. Kepa inhaled a trembling breath and dared to further soften with oncoming tears as Oliver peered his desperate, defeated gaze tight to Kepa's, once more.
"I promised we'd be the best of friends and I failed... I have never failed someone harder," Oliver cried, he grimaced and looked down to his hands in entire, eternal defeat, "I don't know how you could ever forgive me but I'm begging for it... I'm begging..."
Kepa inhaled a trembling breath as tears slipped down her cheeks, she shook her head and wanted to scoop Oliver into a big hug, though residual frustration kept her from befriending him for the time being. She took a dallying turn away, glanced to the lighthouse off the terrace and gently pointed to it.
"Take notes, the lighthouse is doing its best to reach for miracles," Kepa snipped meanly, "Maybe one day he'll forgive you if you wallow in that intention for long enough."
Oliver froze and sorrowfully watched as Kepa unglued her dirty look from his gaze and firmly began to saunter back from where she came, the opened terrace. Once outside, she opened her wings and lofted down into the darkened courtyard and out of sight. Oliver heaved a trembling breath and took note that Vanellope had left the arena altogether, and though he was grateful she knew to remove herself due to the grief, he now felt entirely isolated in the group's teary stares. He huffed a gentle noise of despair and gently closed in on the group, though as he neared Sezeke, he laid a gentle clawed hand to Oliver's bigger upper arm and shook his head.
"I promise she'll come around," Sezeke soothed as Oliver bobbed a nod and allowed himself to show the true depths of his heart, once and for all. Showing vulnerability was something he had become hardened to, due to having to help his mother raise Koko all that time ago, the idea of showing fear or sorrow was a concept he left behind, lone gone and to be forgotten. Sezeke glanced out to the now empty terrace and lulled his eyes closed, "We've all been in her warpath, recently... Mentioning Gideon around her isn't wise, for now, but I promise she'll come around."
"Not how I anticipated meeting her," Oliver whimpered gently as he curiously glossed his teary eyes to Berri's, Lash's and Mara's. They equally looked teary and disheveled, the melt of a sag the group was in was something Oliver felt camaraderie in, "I-I didn't mean to be so mean, I just..."
"You love Gideon too," Sezeke bobbed a nod and sighed, "Sure, there was strain, but nothing could ever wipe that love from your system. You're protective of your baby brother, she's protective of her once-future life partner. Two very intense bonds, clashing with Kepa, right now, is absolutely inevitable."
"One day," Oliver whispered with a nod, "Hopefully one day we'll be friends."
"Oh, you will," Sezeke whispered with a smile and a nod to match Oliver's, "Maybe not now, but... Soon."
