ZEDD

As I walk down the hall, I go over my mental checklist. Washed the dishes, checked the message, finally handled the problem it referred to, and now I'm on my way to the infirmary to look over the side effects of Thomas' new medication, and it only took…crap well over an hour and a half. Sighing and realizing work is going to make it hard to give Thomas the full attention he deserves and now will be getting mostly from me, I decide the least I can do is run and check on him before taking care of anything else.

Changing directions I head for the bedrooms, hoping he's sleeping in either his or mine since I have yet to have him come find me.

Stopping at his first, his door standing wide open, I take a quick glance inside and see that he's not in there, something that really isn't that surprising though if I really think about it.

Moving towards mine next, as I get closer, I realize two things at once. One, the door isn't quite closed and two, that a rather familiar sound is coming from inside. Oh hells. I knew I should have moved those movies somewhere else. I take a deep breath before looking in the room, not sure what I'll find or if I will be able to handle whatever it is when I do. Will he be angry? Disgusted? Frightened? Sigh, only one way to find out I suppose.

I push the door open a bit and freeze at the sight before me. There stretched out on my bed, pants shoved down below his hips and stroking himself is my one time enemy and current charge. Eyes closed, he seems to be lost in some fantasy, whispering to himself as the movie plays on in the background. This can't be real. I must have passed out. I just must have.

Unsure of just what to do here I turn my focus away from his hands and instead let my gaze rest on his still moving mouth. What is he saying? Really is there a need for words? I'd think moans would be more then enough. Curious though I tune out the sounds coming from the screen and focus just on him, trying to make out his words as he moves faster.

"Oh, god - more. Please, Zedd, more." Hearing my name from his lips that way instantly causes me to harden. The thought crosses my mind to join him and show him what I can do for him, but the rational part holds me back. He's not ready for that just yet, is he? Uncertainty stops me and I know that if I have any chance of avoiding making a huge mistake that I won't be able to fix I must leave and now.

Right leave, just one problem with that as well, I doubt I can get out of here without him hearing me and knowing. Unsure what to do once more, I clear my throat, alerting him to my presence.

"Ah!" Oops. Apparently that was the wrong thing to do. Watching as the adrenaline rush from being caught seems to give him the last nudge he needed he goes over the edge spilling into his hand and onto his stomach. An enjoyable sight, mind you, and a privilege to view in spite of the fact that it was self-induced, however I doubt he's as appreciative as I am right now.

Cheeks already pink from his exertion, it doesn't take much for them to go fully red at the sight of me standing in the doorway. Neither of us knows what to do at this point, judging by the silence that stretches out between us and finally, I speak. "Normal practice, Thomas, for such an activity, involves closing and possibly locking the door. Just as a future reference."

His voice is small, but there is a clear hint of accusation as he responds. "How long have you been standing there?" Too long and yet at the same time not long enough.

"Not long. It took a moment to process what I was seeing and then I cleared my throat to let you know I was here." No need to mention, really, that I heard him use my name.

"Oh my god." Face still burning in embarrassment, he throws his arm over his eyes - a move I would not really expect as I'm rather surprised to realize that he has not bothered to cover other more personal parts.

Attempting to take some of his embarrassment away by using a casual tone I change the subject calmly. "I came to tell you that I was heading for the infirmary and I'll be back shortly. Perhaps we'll start working on some of your lost skills then. All right?"

As a grunt is given in response I nod and pull the door shut as I leave the room, the image of him pleasing himself still burned in my brain and his whisper still echoing in my ears.

Hurrying to the infirmary, certain it will still be vacant, I step into its attached bathroom and quickly release my own throbbing organ. Making certain my own barriers are firmly in place, I begin stroking myself. His whispered words from both his prior excursions into self release chase themselves around my head. The visual image I now have only enhances my pleasure and once more, it is over too soon. Sagging against the wall and catching my breath one final thought echoes in my head. I really do need to get properly laid.

-oooo-

A quick clean up later and I am back in the main room of the infirmary, reading over the papers and trying to find out if Thomas' tiredness earlier is normal. Frustratingly, I find that I cannot focus well enough to make sense of the medical mumbo jumbo before me. Throwing the papers back on Pina's desk in irritation, I sigh heavily and leave the room. As much as it galls me, I'll probably have to ask the young woman for help.

For now though I suppose I'd better go see what Thomas is up to. Hopefully nothing as 'active' as last time I looked in on him.

Deciding to take my time returning to the bedroom as I want to give him sufficient time to gather his wits - among other things - I head back to my office checking my mail once more before strolling back to my room.

Once I reach the door, I'm not surprised to see the bed straightened, the cabinet and drawer closed, and Thomas standing by the window, looking out.

Just as I'm about to announce my presence, he speaks. "What did you hear when you came in?"

Uh oh - this might not go as well as I planned. Choosing my response carefully, not completely certain just what he's looking for or rather not looking for in my answer, I keep it as basic as can be. "I heard the video, of course."

Still not facing me, he continues softly. "Did you hear anything else?" You mean like my name on your lips as you came? No, of course not. Whatever would make you think that.

My eyes narrow slightly and I respond with a question of my own. "Thomas, do you really want to talk about this?" He doesn't move or speak for a minute. "Thomas, it's not a big deal. It's normal and I don't really see a need to discuss it. Just forget it and move on." After all one of us obsessing over it is enough, no need to bring both into the mess.

Apparently not one to take my advice he leans his head against the thick glass before heaving a sigh. His next question throwing me as he does. "Are you mad?" Mad? Mad about what?

"Mad? Why would I be mad Thomas?"

Looking at me as if I'd lost my mind, he shakes his head slowly. "You mean besides the fact I went through your stuff and did… THAT on your bed?"

Ah, humans, honestly. "Of course not. As I said, it's natural. Actually, it's a good thing." Smirking to myself as he gives me another stunned look, I continue easily. "If you are once more becoming comfortable with yourself, then progress has been made. Not to mention you felt safe enough to relax enough to do it. Both very good things."

"But-"

I can feel my brow furrow as I cut him off. "Thomas, do you really want to be in trouble? Because you keep acting like you do. If not, let it go. Otherwise, by all means, push the issue."

I wait for a minute as his mouth opens and closes a few times before he finally shakes his head.

"Good. Now, we are going to go to another room and start working on your lost skills. I'll even give you the choice - buttons or reading?"

Thomas shrugs once more. "It doesn't matter. I need to work on both of them, right? Maybe we'll have time to work on both of them."

I'm really started to get irritated with this apathetic attitude he's using. The wicked side of me wants to push him out of his apathy - badly. Not the best idea, however, as I'm sure it will probably lead Pina to beat the hell out of me later, however it is highly tempting.

Sighing and deciding that perhaps I can come up with something that won't be too obvious and thus lead to my ass getting kicked by the female warrior, I gesture towards the door. "All right, come on then. We'll work somewhere else."

As I lead him from the room, it occurs to me that he's in a state similar to the one he was in when he told me what had happened in the rehabilitation clinic. He's not dealing with his emotions. Not to mention he's deflected the one attempt I made to talk about it. Maybe Pina - no, she said that I need to take on more of his care, however as much as I hate to admit it, I'm in way over my head this time. I stop outside the door of my office and take a deep breath.

"This is my office. It may or may not bring back memories. If it does, I remind you that I am no longer that person."

His brow furrows and he nods. "Okay."

Here goes nothing. I open the door and allow him to enter first. If it does trigger some less than pleasant memories, at least I'll be between him and the door.

Stepping inside he moves to the center of the room and turns slowly, taking in everything from my books, desk, maps, schematics, to finally my staff which is leaning up against the far wall. He stops dead at the sight of that item. Crap.

"Thomas? Thomas are you all right?"

Not responding the silence stretches out for several minutes before he suddenly returns to his perusal of my office. Finally, only when completely done, does he speak. "So what are we starting with?"

I frown knowing the staff must have trigged something but what that something is he's clearly not about to say just yet. Fine then I suppose I can wait. Focusing on his question, I answer after a brief pause for thought. "Reading, I think. And possibly writing, too. Sit there."

He sits in the chair that I point at near the desk watching me closely as I move behind it and pull out paper and pens. On one sheet of paper, I write out his alphabet before I turn the sheet around so that it's right side up for him and begin the lesson.

"This is your human alphabet, it's similar to ours, only you have upper and lower case letters in yours. These are just the upper case, I'd like to see if you can do those first before moving onto the lower case ones. All right?"

Scowling slightly he takes a pen from me as he looks over the letters. "I'm not completely dumb Zedd, I remember upper and lower case okay. Geez. So what do you want me to do? Copy them or something?"

"For the first thing yes, after that I want you to write the letter I ask you to. Say for instance I asked you to write the letter G. How would you do that?"

Looking slightly miffed he moves to write the letter before pausing and looking up at the alphabet I've written, frowning even harder as he can't seem to pick G out of the list, I can tell this is going to be a trying task for him.

"It's all right, we'll go about it slowly, Thomas."

-ooo-

(1 hour later…)

I can tell by his behavior that he's getting tired of the lessons. His frustration and irritation fills the room like a living thing and yet, his barrier remains intact. I push him once more. "Come, Thomas, it's not that difficult."

He looks up at me, eyes blazing, and I finally feel something from him for the first time in days. I am surprised, however, at the venom in his voice when he speaks. "I'm trying, Zedd! This isn't that easy, you know! Maybe you need to be shot in the head and find out how hard it is to do this!"

There it is - the crack I've been waiting for. I merely raise an eyebrow at him deciding that this is exactly the correct time to push harder. "That'll never happen. I'm not that careless."

He slams his fist on the desk sending his papers and pens scattering. "I'm not careless!"

"No?" Knowing I'm near being cruel, while also possibly flirting with some form of pain, I can't seem to help myself as I have decided that once he became frustrated enough over his educational lesson we would move onto his physical, which unfortunately needs to start with me assessing just how capable of a fighter he still is. "Could have fooled me. After all you were careless enough to be shot in the head, were you not?"

Looking as if he's about ready to go for my throat, I watch his barely withheld rage as he spits out his response. "I was not careless! It was just luck on their part! I could show you just how un-careless I am if you don't shut up!" Bingo.

"I'd like that actually. Shall we go outside? Perhaps you'll get in a 'lucky shot'."

"Fine!" He stands up and heads for the door too furious to even consider the fact that he is far weaker by nature then I am as an Eltarian and I could if I wanted kill him before he could even raise a hand.

Smiling to myself, I follow him. "Out front, if you please. I would hate to have the gardens that Dar and Pina worked so hard on damaged while you're proving yourself."

I would swear that he's growling under his breath. I would worry that I've pushed him too far, but I've always been slightly better at hand to hand combat, not to mention again that my species is by nature far stronger than his. At this point though, I can only hope that it'll be enough as he looks near furious enough to perhaps tap into his Falcon.

Once out of the palace and on the front lawn, he drops into a fighting stance as I simply stand looking at him.

Pressing the matter home before he can reconsider, I fake a yawn as if highly unimpressed and bored. "Whenever you're ready, Thomas. I do have other things to do today aside knocking you on your ass all afternoon you know."

Apparently, that's the last push he needed. He launches at me, rage gleaming in his eyes. I block several shots before I knock him back, though he is on his feet and after me again in no time.

His attacks are still controlled as his rage hasn't completely taken him over, but he's angry enough that he's not thinking about it. Instinct is leading him and, so far, doing a rather good job at it.

After a few more blocked shots, I start fighting back. Starting easy and then increasing the speed and difficulty, while trying not to hurt him. This is my kind of teaching - active and moving, not stuck in a room with both teacher and student getting frustrated with the lesson and each other.

A bit more into it I have to admit that I'm pleased to see that he's learned more since I saw him last, not to mention the crack in his barrier lets me get a small taste of his emotional state right now. He's still angry and frustrated, but less so now as he's actually having to put some effort and focus into fighting back. Another few strikes and I'll snap him out of it.

A plan comes to mind and, for a minute, I wonder if it's a good idea. It's a calculated risk, really, but then I didn't get where I am today by taking the safe path. Of course, that's how I ended up evil all those years ago as well...

Shaking off this last thought, I watch for my opportunity deciding to risk it the consequences be damned. A few minutes later, it comes as he throws a punch toward my face. I let it connect, twisting with it to soften the blow. I touch my cheekbone to be sure that it isn't cracked as I turn back to the boy. "Consider that your one and only shot."

If my memory serves me, that should be the first thing he heard me say since his accident. Granted, the tone and attitude are nowhere near the same as the one I used on that abusive, raping son of a bitch human whose skull I cracked open, but still.

"What?"

"I said consider that your one and only shot."

Ah, the reaction I was hoping for. He's stopped fighting and - although he's still in position to continue - his eyes narrow as he tries to recall just where he's heard that before.

Come on, Thomas. Connect the dots. I know you can do it. Just try and- ah ha there it is. I can see his eyes widen slightly when he finally places it. When he remembers when I said that last and what followed I can almost see the gears turning in his head as he tries to decide what to do next.