Reviews :
Burgie : Yes they certainly did! Novus has given absolutely everyone the cold shoulder this whole time, and has been away for huge stretches of time, no one considered that he'd be the linchpin here lol.
chuckiboo : Thank you SO MUCH! And, yes! I can't believe you remembered those chapters and such :) This reunion, this chapter is amongst my favorite chapters I think in the whole entire saga. I have a handful of chapters even I'll go back to and reread due to just how much I love it, or just what wonderful memories come up, THIS chapter absolutely is near the very top. I dare to say it's number 1. Kepa and Gideon have another similar chapter later on, I think it's somewhere near 194 or so, that comes pretty close as well. I hope you enjoy this chapter just as much as I do!
Snake557 : It is a little early, him and Novus have rather... Tense conversation in chapter 188, he comes back in full eventually, Novus just takes the longest to warm back up to Gideon. And, thank you! Elkuorra is one of my more cutesy women I write for. Coming close to her would be people like Libby or even Emery. Soft and gentle, mostly just a soft ray of morning sunshine with a small bite of sass. Elkuorra really dotes on Gideon, in coming chapters, I really like their bond as well. Elkuorra knows how important Gideon is to Kepa, so right from the jump she's one hundred percent on board. Even if Sezeke's not too thrilled about it all haha.
A/N : Hey guys! Due to the sheer size of this chapter, I won't be uploading this Wednesday. Chapter 188 will be uploaded this Friday, May 6th.
As I said above, I -really- enjoy this chapter. It's very easily one of my top 3 favorite chapters in the whole entire saga. Kepa's and Gideon's relationship mirror's mine and my husband, as do a lot of my couples throughout the saga, in vastly different aspects each. My husband's bubbly and very easy-going personality encapsulates Kepa, while you guys know my own plight about Gideon mirroring me with not only being on the spectrum, but having an asinine amount of childhood trauma, beyond what's mimicked in the saga, sensory issues, is highly sensitive, artistic in every sense of the form... There was a season of life where I left my husband, then boyfriend. We had a bad fight, things came to a head, misunderstandings got to be too big, I packed my shit and was gone within a few hours. Although I had extended family a 4 hour drive north that very kindly took me in, I abandoned Cory. Granted this was over 4 years ago and, not only are we now happily married, the time apart was needed to heal and sort priorities. The tale of Gideon abandoning Kepa is... Entirely based on a true story. I am still haunted with images of that night, of me putting my car into drive, taking one last look at our gaping doorway, and seeing Cory's blackened silhouette standing in our near-empty house, my artwork stripped from the walls... Sobbing his eyes out and watching me leave. He desperately didn't want me to leave, but I was adamant about it and although it killed him, I left.
I spent 6 months with the very blackened understanding that I had run away from home. No singular point on the planet felt more like home that in Cory's arms. I dropped everything due to a misunderstanding that spiraled. I left him confused, in the dark, heartbroken, and sure, I didn't run off and go on a murder spree for a game show, but... When I returned, it was then I knew it took leaving everything I knew to truly understand where home was. It wasn't a location I had been traipsing the whole United States for, it was the thing inside Cory's chest. He's taught me to seek sunlight in every situation, he's so insanely intuitive and cosmically sharpened, he's such a beam of energy and light that shadows stop existing once you're pulled into his gravity. He's so genuine and strives to make blatantly clear just how much of a safe haven his soul is, daily. It took me leaving to scuff to a dead halt and realize I fucked up something so incredibly beautiful... And the road back was verrrry long.
This singular story has been... -INCREDIBLY- difficult for me to write. I've ripped old wounds open and have been very vulnerable with the world, vulnerable with myself. This doesn't include all the horrible childhood trauma I'm still stuck with, to this day. I was that left over child, I was forgotten about, I suddenly stopped existing once my much-older-than-me siblings had children, once all of them and my million cousins with THEIR million children now all could continue hanging out and doing life together, but... My bedtime was 8pm and no one even... Knew me. They still don't. My art shows didn't matter, my karate matches weren't attended, no one asked how I was or inquired about my artwork. My whole family is creative and musical, but because my talent exploded from a young age, it was almost as if no one knew what to even do with me, in a bad way. And now, -none- of them have talked to me ever again, save for literally maybe 2 or 3 of the dozens. Not only has THAT whole aspect been insanely hard to write about, Gideon's mirrored departure and return has singlehandedly been the thing holding me together. If I didn't have Cory through all the crap we've been through in the last decade, I don't think I'd be alive.
-all- to say... Please understand that every ounce of my heart goes into these chapters, into each story, into the whole saga. I'm well aware my maladaptive daydreaming is what's fueling me for all of this, I understand this is my own way of coping through art and music, but please know that every single word written has colossal depth. And, to have you guys here supporting me and reading along, cheering not only me on, but me through my characters? It's been the hugest blessing I could ever imagine. Thank you so much for reading, everyone.
I adore this chapter and I wrote it all in one go. I didn't move for like 2 hours, I was so invested. Clearly noted the word count. If it's a beefy chapter anything over 4/5K, you know I couldn't put it down lol
Song Listened To :
You Are the Reason by Olivia Penalva - I'm begging you to please listen to this song it's super fitting uhg. Both of these songs, really.
Still Falling For You by Ellie Goulding
*Chapter 187*
"Tess, this is... Too much," Gideon's raspy voice mumbled, him and Tessa lazily sagged to Gideon's huge, brand new kitchen island, clad in a gloss of white stone, his new abode laid in glossy concrete, walnut accents with lovely splashes of calming green walls, the dim, homey lighting embraced the two in the prickle of a brand new fresh start, a welcome home Gideon was finally able to breathe in. He chuckled in soft surprise and looked about his and Beaux's new living area, the huge arch of the spire's ceiling gaped upwards for what felt like at least three floors, and with this, he immediately had visions of Kepa's lighthouse spire, all lined with her scratching and landing perches. He lulled his eyes closed in gratitude and soaked it all in, his cheeky voice pressed on, "Y'could've put me in the Fungeon and I wouldn't question you."
"The Fungeon," Tessa whispered through an uplift of a wide grin and a happy giggle, she crossed her arms and shook her head as her and Gideon lazily strolled about the other side of the island and to the sprawl of open shelving and cabinets, as well as the fridge and other kitchen appliances, all brand new. She gestured to the gorgeous, huge stove top range and shrugged, "I didn't want to really hold out hope that you were returning, and only really Zed knows this, but... This spire was outfitted with you in mind, and when you left, I kept updating it in hopes that... You'd return."
Gideon sagged his shoulders and peered to Tessa in a swing of humbled, smiling defeat. The two held gazes for a moment, sweet reminders that even though his family was nearly broken, that past hurt had wrought them silly, he felt a world of love in Tessa's eyes, a swing of camaraderie he had been desperate for all along. Gideon bobbed a shy nod, glossed his eyes across his currently barren home and felt a huge hug of relief hit his skin, he couldn't believe that fate had worked out to this huge magnitude, everything he was desperate for was something he got, in one form or another. He was grateful he had his fun in the dark web, though he grimaced and understood that if maybe one tiny thing went wrong during his escape, if any tiny shred of anything had been different in his escape, he likely wouldn't be here. Humbled down to the ground, he heaved a shaky sigh and bobbed another nod in Tessa's direction, he knew he'd be feeling apology, humility, undeserving gratitude, all of it, for many months to come.
"You don't know what that means to me," Gideon huffed quietly, though just as Tessa was about to erupt into more tears, she sucked in a huge inhale, fanned her eyes and urgently peered across Gideon's huge kitchen island with a wide, annoyed grin.
"Whew, okay, let's... Let's unpack these before I start crying, I'm tired of crying," Tessa blurt with a hard giggle, her's and Gideon's fresh laughter bounced around Gideon's barren, temporarily furniture-less home. Gideon grunted and took off his hoodie to reveal a lazy red tank top, alongside the equally as lazy black sweats he wore. Tessa tossed her hair into a low ponytail and reached for the big box Gideon had carried over here, Tessa sniffled and wiped her eyes as she composed herself and changed the topic, "I-I know a majority of your stuff is going to be moved by the code room, but... Why did mom want you to bring this over manually again?"
"It's... Remember these plates I painted on as a child?" Gideon pressed as her and Tessa lazily opened the box, Tessa scoffed a nostalgic giggle as a few dinner plates were brought out all messily splayed with Gideon's scribblings as a very young child, "Mom has never trusted the code room with my artwork, I don't know why. She thinks it'll accidentally clear the art from the plate, or canvas or whatever else. She also put in some of her's and dad's flatware and stuff, I... I told her I wanted new furniture and new things, and none of my old childhood bedroom furniture and I think she panicked."
"Yeah, trust me, having a child leave the nest is..." Tessa halted her words as Gideon sweetly began to unpack said box of treasure with patience, she heaved a shaky sigh as both siblings caught eyes, she immediately understood that she should likely flip the narrative in a way that didn't boast her own experiences as an empty-nester herself, "Mom loves us. Having all four of us leave, wondering if it's going to be her last time to send a child off for good, probably isn't easy for her. This is her way to send you off and make clear you're loved, to have essences of your old home life to carry on with you."
"User, now you're going to make ME cry," Gideon grunted as he set one of the bigger plates down, with his art splashed across it, he grunted a chuckle and shook his head, "Y-You think they'll have a fifth?"
"After all THIS drama? After everything all four of us have put them through?" Tessa stabbed with a wide smile that Gideon succumbed to with a roll of his eyes, "It'll be years. I almost doubt it."
"Welp, we got enough plates for it," Gideon mused with a cute laugh as he carefully grappled a stack out of the box and set them down on the island, Tessa grinned as Gideon carried on, "Poor Beaux, gunna have to endure eating breakfast on my crappy artwork."
"I actually have a few things I can bring over for you, too, looks like tomorrow we can do some code room shopping and get you and Beaux set up nicely," Tessa mused, she shook her head and began to leave the kitchen island, in preparation to push towards the large, open-airy corridor that hugged the wall opposite the kitchen, far across the stretch of the lack of living room furniture. As she crossed over, she looked over her shoulder and gestured her hand, "I'll be right back, gunna grab some stuff, and then we can get you setup with a bed and stuff for the night."
"Okay," Gideon chirped as he broadened his gaze to behind him and began to patiently scour for a place to put the many pieces of flatware Vanellope had parted with.
Tessa sucked in a huge breath and shook her head as she gently sagged Gideon's massive, lovely front door shut with an easy clack. She stood in the gape of her's and now Gideon's beautiful outdoor foyer, domed by the spires over head and covered in a vine-ladened high ceiling with a drop down of a beautiful outdoor chandelier. Said area was tiled in the same tile that the palace wall's walkway was clad in, though it was spiraled in decorative displays. Tessa tossed her eyes to her left and was grateful her front door was literally a hundred feet from Gideon's, she was floored that this was her new life, her baby brother was home and well on his way to renewal, she was grateful everything was finally beginning to fall into place, and though the threat of the dark web following Gideon home was an imminent issue she knew not to ignore, she breathed a happy sigh and fell into the rhythm of pressing to her's and Zed's equally as lovely home. In the flex of turning left and heading home, she flinched as a sudden hefty sound of multiple flaps interrupted her motion, and with a firm wretch over her shoulder, sharply to her right, she froze in solid stun to see Novus and another winged being coming to a firm scuff of a landing in the cast of moonlight that the passing rain clouds finally released.
Tessa held her breath in hot confusion, though in the plague, she suddenly felt a ripple of goosebumps course her as the glint of Novus's huge blue eyes stabbed to Tessa from across the gap, he emanated a swathe of understanding, a whole beam of energy both beings radiated was that of pure, unadulterated urgency, it was in Novus's huge, teary, painful eye contact alone did Tessa understand that this very familiar looking creature stood with him was Kepa. Before Tessa could hurry to the two and question just what was going on, Novus and Kepa caught eyes in a swing of curiosity, though just as Tessa assumed Novus would speak up and make clear his and Kepa's intentions, Novus bobbed Kepa a sweet nod, gave her a final hug, shot Tessa a look of silent understanding and easily lifted in a loft across palace boundaries, in the direction of his enclosure across the way. Tessa huffed a falter of a breath, watched Novus vanish into the night, and now hotly understood that she was left entirely alone with none other than Kepa. Tessa felt her breath pick up, she peered to Kepa in a swing of excitement, panic, uncertainty, her brain bricked with the idea that Gideon was now most definitely within her reach, something Tessa was eager to cushion before the blow of dire, needed information Kepa was sure to lose her head in. Tessa inhaled a shaky breath and took a few steps closer to Kepa, across their fifty foot gap, though with a flinch, she was shocked to see Kepa make her wings disappear, her figure urgently began to stomp in Tessa's direction with full purpose, it was clear she was going to stop at nothing until she was in Gideon's arms.
"Where is he?" Kepa quietly demanded as she came into the light, mere twenty feet from Gideon's front door, something Tessa urgently stood in between. Tessa tenderly held out her hands to insinuate she wasn't a threat, nor was she going to stop Kepa from getting what she wanted, though she was desperate to have at least a briefing with Kepa before she dove head first into the harrowing hardships Gideon had endured, what he had come home with. It was clear Novus had no information, it was clear neither of them knew what Kepa was stepping into, and with such, Tessa softened and was desperate to suddenly wrangle in this terrifying being with unconditional love, a plea for leveling, something Tessa knew that in this moment was a massive ask. Much to Tessa's surprise, Kepa's huge, adorable, teary eyes peered to Tessa in a downswing of uncertainty, her figure hovered half a dozen feet from Tessa's figure, she tucked her fists to her chest and shook in teary crumpling as her soft voice whispered on in desperation, "Please tell me this isn't fake, please tell me Gideon's home, please... Please, Tessa, please."
"He's home," Tessa lovingly assured, she was eternally grateful that Kepa was keeping her voice low, though she felt her heart surge as Kepa's intelligent eyes fervently glanced to Gideon's front door in a swing of looking as if she was about to pounce. With a world of bravery, Tessa very cautiously closed their gap and ever so carefully gripped her hands to Kepa's upper arms, "It's not fake, he's here... Please... Let me at least brace you."
"Brace me?" Kepa whimpered, she grimaced a teary look into Tessa's eyes and shook her head as she was now due to unloading. However desperate to keep her voice down, she pressed on in a shaky whisper, "What happened, is he okay?"
"He's fine, he's been through a few nights of coded rehab, he's been through a mess of trouble," Tessa cautiously instructed, "He has crazy tattoos and piercings and looks a little haggard, but... He's still Gideon."
"I'm so angry with you," Kepa firmly revealed through her tears, though she hugged her own self and looked more sorrowful about her confession than anything. She grit her teeth, narrowed her wet eyes and trembled in full confusion on just what emotion to feel, she sagged in on herself and somehow relished in the feel of Tessa's impending embrace, "I have no clue how to treat you right now, I'm just so angry and confused... I want to hate you, I want to hate everyone here, I just want to know that Gideon's okay..."
"You have every right to hate me, I'm prepared for this long road to normalcy, Kepa," Tessa soothed with a smile, she was almost thrilled that Kepa was at least talking to her, at least the ball was rolling, she was floored to feel Kepa come unravelled in silent crying and step a little tighter into Tessa's bubble. With every ounce of love Tessa had for her baby brother, she scoffed a teary giggle and was floored it all so easily dumped into this raw, fragile being she was just meeting. The woman of Gideon's dreams, the one singular being who held onto the hugest beam of hope, Tessa knew to treat this woman before her like the Queen she was, and with a firm snug of an embrace, Tessa wrapped her arms tight about Kepa's trembling shoulders and warmly rubbed her upper back in quiet shushing that continued, "He's been dying to see you, too... We were going to come get you a little later, but... I guess Novus beat us to it."
"I just want to see my Gideon, I need to know he's okay," Kepa's sweet cries laid into Tessa's shoulder as her trembling arms gripped tight about Tessa's torso, and with every ounce of humility Tessa could afford, she smiled into the side of Kepa's head and bobbed an assured nod.
"He's all yours, c'mon," Tessa whispered in assurance, and as the two slowly pulled apart, Tessa smiled into her teary eyes and gently gripped her hand in the eventual tug that lead back to Gideon's front door.
With a gentle swing, both Kepa and Tessa stepped inside. Tessa kept ahold of Kepa's hand as the two slowly continued down Gideon's empty, dim front corridor, and with the round into the huge, airy space all lovely lit with the house lights, they peered out from the gape of the entry corridor, out to the span of their right, and was visited with the sight of Gideon's back to the room. He cutely opened and closed cabinets, he mused on by himself in silent murmuring, as sweet as could be. Kepa covered her mouth and did everything to keep from erupting into a earth-shattering yell of shock, though just as Tessa was about to reveal that maybe Gideon should turn around and seal his destiny, Gideon obviously heard Tessa's arrival and pressed her a notion, he was near-shoulder deep into one of the huge pantry cabinets. Tessa and Kepa slowly continued to press into the gape of the space, though as Tessa came to a slow, rolling stop, Kepa slipped her hand from Tessa's and cautiously continued past Tessa in preparation to pounce. Her hand still held to her mouth in trembling stun, her tail hung low in a swing of a million different emotions, Gideon's kind voice was muffled from inside the cabinet he seemingly inspected.
"Tessa, these cabinets are fucking massive, like what is the point?" Gideon grunted a laugh, stood to correction and peered into the huge gape of the cabinet with his hands on his hips. He finally gestured to it and measured with the sprawl of his bigger hands, "Like... I'm pretty sure Kepa could fit in here, wings and all. This can't possibly be a food cabinet."
"I mean, why don't you test it right now, she's here, isn't she?" Tessa lazily mused, to which Gideon furrowed his eyebrows in a swing of cheeky annoyance, though as he turned around to cutely defy his sister, he flinched in shock and peered hard to the one being he had been dreaming of seeing, tight within mere ten feet from him.
Gideon raised his eyebrows in a swipe of hot surprise, the world spun to a slow, and as he exhaled a shaky breath with wild disbelief that his eyes were even being met with Kepa's in this instance, he stiffened in a suck of a sharp, trembling inhale of a gasp and didn't dare let his eyes leave hers. Kepa grit her teeth and held her trembling arms and hands into her chest in the push of uncertainty, how desperately she wanted to collide with him was now becoming something she couldn't hold back any longer, and with Gideon's trembling word, the whole world brightened.
"Kepa," Gideon whispered in enchanted, near-terrified wonder, and with said final push, Kepa whimpered a final cry of sorrowful gratitude out to the universe and leaped into action.
Knowing the sun would eventually shine again, the two urgently grappled into the embrace of the century, the tight tangle of Kepa's arms draped about Gideon's neck, the swallow of his big arms and hands about Kepa's back, the two huffed into a tight collide and didn't dare undo it. Kepa sucked in a huge, trembling breath and now knew this was the chance to get every single last urge of grief off of her chest, every single night she cried herself to sleep was now something she was urgently due to ridding, she squeezed her arms about Gideon as tight as she could and erupted with the sweetest, saddest cries her figure could possibly afford. She snugged her snout into Gideon's neck and relished in every single last sensation offered to her, his familiar scent, the stubble on his jaw, the lay of his big hands to her upper back, the soothing, trembling pet his other hand took to the back of her head, the two came wildly unglued in the gentle, shaking swaying they took, one unit once divided, now sealed and due to never parting, ever again. Gideon grit his teeth and shoved his forehead into the bend of her familiar, furry little shoulder, the two shook with tears, the embrace of final healing they were desperate for, for so long, now finally theirs.
Tessa clutched her sternum and easily wept alongside them, although silent. She grinned and was floored that she was now invisible, she was well aware she now needed to scoot out of the picture and leave the two be, though as she began to slowly part, she tossed her eyes across Gideon's home and took in one last swallowing image of the two, this rare event she had a glimpse of was something she knew she'd never forget, something that easily aided in her healing as well. She beamed through her tears and watched as the two melted into firm rubs on each other's skin, the raw whimpers of their shared cries into each other's shoulders, the expel of sorrow they were urgently doing what they could to rewrite into a brand new beginning was something Tessa felt honored to have a tiny part in. With one last ogling glance to the two, she finally turned heel and saw herself out, once and for all, the silent clack of Gideon's front door and the proverbial do not disturb cloak she put over Gideon's spire, she was happy to give the two however much time they needed to hopefully sort their differences.
"I can't even believe it," Kepa cried into Gideon's neck, she trembled in his tight embrace and urgently began to pet the top of Gideon's shoulder with her wildly quaking hand. She sucked in a huge breath and buried her snout into Gideon's jaw with the seal of her eyes, she felt her heart race with the sound of his nasally chuckle of agreeing surprise tight in her ear, his hot breath that caused the fur on her shoulder to flit about with said exhale, she fluttered her eyes in never-ending tears and was absolutely certain she had stepped into an alternate reality. She grimaced a hard cry into Gideon's neck as she slowly sagged her arms down Gideon's broad chest, stood to the flat of her feet and allowed Gideon's height to hover over her, deep in his strong embrace. She urgently cried into his chest and was nearly about to allow crying-hiccups to get the better of her quaking figure, "This can't be real, please tell me this is real, please don't let this be a dream..."
"I'm here, we're here together," Gideon croaked cutely onto the top of her head as he swallowed her in his huge embrace, complete with tender swaying, the gentle pets his bigger hand deployed to her soft ears and the back of her curiously short hair, she scoffed a shaky laugh and grinned through the multitudinous amount of tears both beings continued to shed, "On second hand, I-I'm not even sure, any longer."
"H-How did you get home? How the hell is any of this even real?" Kepa cried as she bravely began to pull away, desperate to look into Gideon's golden eyes, and though the two just barely allowed breathing room, she still held her hands tightly rested to Gideon's broad chest as his hands tenderly held her upper arms. She sucked in a trembling, teary breath and peered hard up into Gideon's face; although she was warned about Gideon's tattoos and piercings and haggard appearance, she felt her heart sink in a weird fit of sorrow and joy at the mere sight of him. Clearly beat up and put back together, the look of unwinding collapse and rebuild tight in his demeanor, Kepa peered hard into his eyes and dared to allow a dainty grin to sprawl her face as the sunlight in his eyes still held every single last ounce of his soul, bright and sunny like she had been dreaming of. She erupted in nasally giggling and was glad this caused an equally as happy, teary grin to sprawl Gideon's handsome face, "I have so many questions, I-I don't even know where to begin."
"Y-You probably wouldn't believe me if I told you, anyways," Gideon huffed cutely into her face, the two hovered in panting, teary disbelief as they gripped each other's skin. Gideon assessed her sweet face, the adorable cut of her beautiful pink hair, he broadened his gaze and stood still tight with Kepa's arms in his grip, "You cut your hair, it looks so good. This pixie cut looks adorable on you, I didn't think you could ever look any cuter."
"Thank you," Kepa meeped cutely as Gideon lovingly reached up, stroked his big thumb to Kepa's left cheek and rid her of the tears that fell.
"I missed you so much," Gideon shakily whispered, his hand trembled, and though Kepa so desperately wanted to just sigh away their troubles and now continue this night picking each other's brains and really getting down to all the questions that need to be answered, she suddenly felt a pit of boiling rage want to come over her with the raw fact that she felt the need to gate-keep the feeling of missing each other, and just what that all meant to her.
"You have no idea," Kepa whispered in return, though as the sag of her ears now lifted from the dead, the feeling of desperately wanting to be in Gideon's arms gifted to her, the next emotion that came about was something she wasn't expecting to happen so quickly into this. With sharpness that suddenly flood her, she wrinkled her nose and dared to give Gideon a narrow of a mild glower, "Genuinely... You have no... Idea..."
Gideon slowly raised his eyebrows and peered down into Kepa's beautiful, teary gaze, though he immediately understood now just what everyone was warning him about. He knew Kepa was definitely not a being that allowed anyone to walk all over her, she fervently stood for what she believed in and made sure her opinions were heard loud and clear, and though Gideon knew the two had previously had their scuffles and disagreements, he felt his pupils tighten at the raw idea that she was floored he was here, though now that he was, she was due to raining hell fire down on him; the very notion that he broke her heart was enough for him to understand that he now needed to source somewhere to sit and remain. He gingerly loosened his grip on Kepa's upper arms, and though her loving hands remained pressed to Gideon's pecks and their forlorn eye contact stayed seeped into one another's, Kepa inhaled a huge, trembling breath and began to take one or two small steps backwards, so to gain distance from the lovely, rosy feelings that were only masking a giant turd underneath, one that she knew needed to be cleaned up right this instance.
"Yeah, you should... Sit down," Kepa instructed in a whimper of finding her strength as she noticed Gideon shyly bend, grapple at the singular wooden stool lazily thrusted into the bend of the island's counter and base, he grunted to a nervous sit and was eager to not keep any shred of height over her. She crossed her arms, peered hard to Gideon, as he sat about half a foot shorter than her eye level, she assessed him in a few moments of prickled silence as the two wiped their faces free of tears and did what they could to compose. Kepa finally looked off, bobbed a nod, tried not to crumple and eventually shook her head amidst her shaken musings, "Gideon, I have a million questions for you, but... The one that I ask myself every single night before I TRY to go to sleep is... Why? WHY?"
Gideon held his breath and knew answering her, in any way shape and form, wasn't wise. He gulped a nervous swallow and kept his terrified eyes trained to hers, he held his hands in the gape of his lightly spread knees, the hook of his heels on the lower rungs of the bar stool he patiently sat on, he was in awe that he was in Kepa's presence in this raw moment. Kepa gestured to her sternum as a few more tears slipped down her beautiful cheeks, though it was in this full vision of Kepa's body did Gideon feel the hit of full dread drown him; Kepa had gotten skinny, her collar bones and sternum were a lot more prominent, as were her cheekbones, Gideon gulped a swallow and understood that he had gone through a whole world of pain, confusion, torture, though on Kepa's side of things, even though none of it was technically physical, he grimaced and understood she had to just sit, wait, grieve and accept defeat, a pain Gideon knew even he wouldn't choose over his tribulations, if he had a choice. Kepa sucked in a readied breath and narrowed her gaze into Gideon's eyes.
"When you left, all those months ago, that night you up and thought leaping into the internet was the right choice, that was you making a very clear statement right in my face," Kepa pointed into her sternum and flattened her ears, "You might as well have looked me in the eye and said that I wasn't worth understanding, I wasn't worth waiting for, I wasn't worth the explanation of just why I froze up on that fateful Valentine's Day. I would've rather you spit in my face and told me it was over..."
"K-Kepa," Gideon grimaced nervously as huge tears welled in his eyes, though he flinched the second Kepa began to yank her Gideon's red hoodie off of her body, she thrusted it to the island and tightly muttered how she was getting hot, rising anger that was due to lighting the room on fire.
"You INSTEAD chose to run away and shut everyone out, to dive into the dark web, go on a murder spree, do USER knows what the hell to come back, and you expect me to just... Sit here and willingly listen to you tell me that you MISSED me? You actually have the balls to say that you MISSED me, Gideon? You don't know the definition of the word, you had two months and you just so happened to finally miss me and waltz back home?" Kepa flattened her ears, her voice grew in strength, "I cried every single night until the skin around my eyes cracked and bled. I picked the fur right out of my neck due to this stress, I haven't eaten in days, I had to learn that you were Sugar Rush royalty through Lash and Mara, their knocks to my front door the next morning and just DROWNED in tears as they delivered IMPOSSIBLY hard news to me..."
Kepa began to pant through her nose, she clenched her fists as Gideon's lip quivered in full dread, he nervously looked off, looked down to his hands and finally recollected with Kepa's gaze.
"You had EVERY right to be pissed at your family, trust me, I've been dolling verbal ass-whoopings any chance I could, but to abandon ME?!" Kepa firmly gestured to her chest and now came unglued, "I have done NOTHING but be a safe place for you! I made clear you could trust me, we afforded each other so much communication and vowed that home was where each other was! And you RIPPED IT AWAY!"
Gideon sucked in a trembling breath and allowed his tears to freely flow, as did Kepa, he grimaced a small noise and shamefully looked down to his hands, though flinched as Kepa loudly continued on with a firm finger pointed down into Gideon's face.
"YOU ABANDONED ME!" Kepa screamed, her whole body shook, her pupils dilated to huge circles as she firmly gestured into her sternum, repeatedly, she stood stiff in riled, venomous animation, she sucked in a huge breath and erupted like never before, "I thought of EVERYTHING we've been through, you'd abandon every last shred of your life BEFORE abandoning me and not even giving me a chance to defend myself the night you confessed to me!"
"Y-You're right," Gideon whimpered softly, he did his best to not let his tremors get the better of him.
"I FINALLY found sanctuary in this huge, terrifying world and you RIPPED it away from me before I could even reach within myself, battle my own demons and come out with the truth that I had been sidestepping in fear of the permanency. You abandoned me before I could even get the proper chance to tell you that I love you!" Kepa yelled, her voice trembled, though as the words eased from her figure in full confidence, she sucked in a trembling breath and suddenly could feel her skin plague in readied goosebumps. Terrified to continue, wonderstruck that this was even an opportunity she was gifted, she shook her head in teary crumpling and peered hard into Gideon's eyes as she fervently pressed on with words she had never said out loud, words she was desperate to get off of her chest once and for all, "I love you, Gideon."
Gideon raised his eyebrows in a swing of warmed surprise, and though he was well aware this wasn't news, somehow hearing it from Kepa's figure was enough for it to feel like brand new information. Before he could somehow stand and rush to her aid and reassure her that these romantic feelings never left him, Kepa sucked in a silent gasp, took a wary step back and was consumed by a blip of her minty coding that suddenly glitched about in a frenzy of correction, and plopped back to the grid, right before his eyes, was a brand new molt of her beauty. Gideon covered his mouth in true, unadulterated surprise and was absolutely not expecting to see the beautiful, intricate lays of artwork he had spray painted on her stone figure, all those months ago. Her darker grey fur was now a gorgeous, creamy white color with long, beautiful splays of stripes that got darker in tans and chocolate browns further down her limbs. Striking, dark and creamy stripes splayed her face with her own brand of renewed, ethereal beauty, and as Kepa heavily panted and assessed her outstretched arms and the flick and recoil of her beautiful long tail, she sucked in a heavy breath and now peered hard into Gideon's eyes with a renewed sense of pride, a renewed sense of glee she was very adamantly fighting back, though she flattened her ears and rode the coattails of her anger; she knew somehow Gideon was due to quelling it all shortly, anyhow, so she did what she could to get in final words knowing he was due to flattening her strongholds at any minute now.
"And NOW, I'm STUCK with you!" Kepa hollered angrily, though she eventually scoffed a sarcastic little laugh and gestured to her figure, reset like brand new, she nearly glowed. Gideon couldn't help but just sit frozen, fully basking in her incredible, fierce beauty, he was prepared to go into this branch of a reveal not being stunned, but to find that his own craft had made its way to her markings had him nearly passing out due to the shock. Kepa began to urgently pace about the huge space beyond the kitchen, she grappled her now beautiful, short white hair and shook her head, "You've made your mark, Gideon, you are FOREVER a part of me. How do you think I felt when I learned that you just LEFT thinking there was something out there far greater than the love that we had?! My impending molt forever in your name while you just... Traipse the dark web!"
Gideon did absolutely everything he could not to grin like an idiot, he only barely peaked a small smile and stimmed in doing what he could to not pick at his fingers, he jostled his leg a little and had never felt giddier. There was a swoop of love in the air, somehow the uplift of getting absolutely everything off of her chest was something Gideon was relieved about, the long and winding road they now took hand in hand, the beginning of their journey to heal. Gideon heaved a trembling breath and finally allowed a wide grin to sprawl his face, he absolutely couldn't help it any longer. He knew this would only make Kepa angrier, though he braved it.
"And you're just SMILING like an idiot!" Kepa erupted, to which Gideon now choked a teary, humbled little laugh and looked down. Kepa sucked in a shaky breath and began to feel as if she was now truly crumpling, "This is essentially a code swap, Gideon, except Users can't reverse a molt... You are, quite literally, STUCK with me, whether you like it or not. I have NO idea when I'm ever going to NOT be angry at you!"
"That's okay," Gideon huffed in teary smiling as he grunted to a cautious stand, he patiently began to close their near-dozen foot gap Kepa had created, due to her angry pacing.
"You're going to answer for this WHOLE mess, I'm the end-all of your dark web nonsense, Gideon, it ALL ends here," Kepa pointed firmly down to the ground and did everything to keep her lip from quivering, just the vision of Gideon's bigger figure approaching had her knees shaking in the collapse.
"Yes, ma'am," Gideon cued politely with a nod.
"I'm angry with absolutely everyone, but best believe you're at the VERY top of my list, buddy," Kepa meanly snipped as Gideon eased another nod of full understanding.
"You have every single right to hand me my ass for the rest of time, I'd endure every single day of this if it meant we have the opportunity to relive that fateful moment and do it correctly," Gideon ushered warmly, he closed in on her figure, and though she stood proud and tall, she nervously sagged in a slow slump to the flat of her feet and peered up into Gideon's eyes in a swing of bittersweet collapsing. Tears streamed their cheeks as Gideon inhaled a huge, shaky breath and gingerly gripped her littler hands in hers, gorgeous dark brown fur that was beautifully laced with darker, bold stripes all down her fingers. He braved her eyes and narrowed his golden gaze deep into hers as he was desperately did what he could to whisper her a full-circle conclusion, "I love you... Nothing has changed that. I love you more than anything the universe has to offer. I love you, Kepa."
"I love you too, Gideon," Kepa squeaked through a grimace of huge tears, she choked an inhale and grappled his bigger hand in full desperation, "I always have, from day one, I knew, Gideon... The second I let you put this art on my body, I knew I was doomed."
"You are the art, you always have been, the paint was just added flair," Gideon huffed with a loving, humbled smile. He lulled his eyes closed in disbelief and finally reopened in the gentle, polite gloss down her body, she was a vision of beauty. He collected with her gaze and gripped her hand a little harder as he ushered her a nervous plea, "Please... Please let me make this right. I came home because you lit the lighthouse lamp. I came home for you... I'll answer for leaving, I'll answer for how long it took me to realize what an absolute idiot I was for leaving you... I'm begging you, please let me make this right."
"I'm almost scared to tell you that I can't see an end to this all in sight, Gideon," Kepa whispered, she was floored to see Gideon carefully pulling her in a little closer, something she only thought about fighting but was now due to throwing in the towel. She tearfully closed her eyes and barely shook her head, "You've shattered my trust... You have to understand the weight of the uphill battle you're diving into."
"So be it," Gideon's confident, raspy whisper returned, he gingerly removed his hand from hers and cautiously sagged his palm to the dip of her waist, "You're worth every second, I'm adamant about proving that to you for the rest of my time. I failed you once... I will never misstep like this ever again. Ever."
"Promise me," Kepa cried quietly as she grit her teeth and nervously pressed her hands to Gideon's broad chest, to which he smiled down into her face and sucked in a trembling breath due to their close proximity, something he was still wondering was even real.
"I promise... I'll give you a million promises a day, anything you want, it's all yours," Gideon returned kindly through his own tears, he huffed a silent whisper onto the broad flat of her adorable dark brown snout and relished in the feel of her hot, nervous breath tight on his face, "I promise, for the rest of eternity... Unlimited."
Kepa flattened her ears and couldn't stand the distance, she grappled the chest of Gideon's shirt and gently stood a bit taller to fill the gap. Gideon sucked in a trembling, sighing breath through his nose as the two met in a sink of a kiss, the way he finally wrapped his arms about her brand new body had his brain swimming at the idea that this was still all a real thing. The two gently stirred in a brief part of sighing relief, and in the gentle squish of a revisit, Kepa furrowed her brow and urgently wrapped her arms tight about Gideon's neck and head in a desperate grapple, a silent promise that she had been dreaming of this instance, every single last inch of this predicament was something she had been diligently manifesting. To have the fruit of her labor now tight in her grasp was something she was sure she'd be reeling about for weeks to come. Gideon's bigger hands slowly crawled up and down Kepa's back in a huge swallow of an embrace, the gentle flick and hug of her tail about his ankles, like she used to, had the two cutely smacking out of the tilt of their kiss and returning in a squish of broadened smiles that eventually gaped into deeper, teary passion that was becoming of them. Kepa gripped the hair at the base of Gideon's skull as she scrunched her shoulders and stood a bit taller, as if she could possibly get any tighter into his figure. He heaved a shaky little laugh in their tilting squish of a kiss, and with bravery, he slid his bigger hand all the way down her spine and swooped it down the base of her soft tail. She lifted her tail in a swat as he followed her movement and swiped her fur, she hummed a cute, teary giggle into his face and hovered in the press of their foreheads, the flutter of their eyes, the soft panting of their hot breath on each other's mouths.
"I love you," Kepa whispered onto his lips, Gideon lulled his eyes closed and caught her in another squish of a kiss, a slow release of the audible unstick of their lips and Kepa's sighing relief on his mouth, she fluttered her eyes and dragged her hands down the back of Gideon's thick neck, down his broad clavicles and to his powerful chest.
"I love you, too," Gideon returned in soft, yet assured confidence, he warmly rubbed the middle of her back and kept her little body snug into his, something he didn't want to let go of, "I have SO much to tell you."
"Yeah, and I'll be angry the whole time," Kepa muttered into Gideon's face, he eased a grin and closed his eyes in soft knowing.
"That's okay," Gideon whispered sweetly, "I'm angry at myself, too."
"I'm angrier, I promise," Kepa retort, to which Gideon chuckled and bobbed a nod.
"Fair," He mumbled, he was successful in catching her in another snug of a warm kiss in the part of their lips. He was floored to feel her reciprocate in the thick inhale through her nose, the push-back into Gideon's face of fervently returning each of his kisses, she finally grappled the chest of his shirt, once more, and made clear she didn't want any of this to let up. The two gently gaped in a brief hover as Kepa barely fluttered her eyes open, he warmly continued on in a hot whisper on her wet lips, "I-I have to relearn how to kiss you... I've never kissed anyone with these piercings."
"I like them," Kepa innocently confessed inside of a whisper that was barely audible, she smiled on Gideon's lips in a small smack of separation and gently sagged against Gideon's broad chest, "You look badass... Coupled with your crazy-huge tattoos."
"Thank you," Gideon whispered in warm humility as he happily supported Kepa's body against his, he continued to soothingly rub her upper back, the feel of her soft fur on his skin, once more, was enough for him to feel good about kicking this bout of healing into high-gear.
"I can't believe you won... I can't believe any of this is real," Kepa whimpered, she crumpled into tears, once more, to which Gideon now tucked his chin into the top of her head and scooped her into a big swallow of another embrace, "I-I was so scared, for you... It's an absolute miracle you survived and came back."
"I've been telling myself the same thing ever since arriving home," Gideon whispered lovingly into the top of her head, though he felt his heart begin to thud with yet another gift he could give to Kepa, one of such collosal importance, he lovingly pet the back of her head and eagerly anticipated the return of her previous question now coming to light, once more.
"How DID you get home, anyways?" Kepa whimpered into his chest as she raveled her arms about his center, and as he held her tight, he looked across the gape of his huge, empty home and scoffed a shaky chuckle, the sheer bomb he was about to drop on her was something he was almost worried about, for fear of her passing out.
"I was serious about what I said," Gideon playfully huffed with a nod, he cocked an eyebrow and knew he had to get Kepa to Elkuorra's house, somehow convince her that everything she had ever dreamed of was now hers, diligent labor now fully bearing fruit, just for her, "You're not gunna believe it."
