A/N: "Aight, you wanted me to write sumthin'?" Serpent Armour slithers forth, eyes glowing a dark red, "Well then, ye done asked for it. It will be ..., but of course. Because that be more horrifyin' than ... I know not these characters well enough for this, so OOCness may be done. However, I am goin' ta go with ...'s ... obsession."

Sue Me - Chapter One.

Zuko stood before the Avatar, the battle having been long and difficult for them both. His uncle had taken Sokka and Katara away from the battle, so they did not have to witness it. The deal was, if Aang won, Zuko would teach him Fire Bending. If Zuko won, Aang would return with Zuko to the Fire Nation as Prince Zuko's prisoner. Zuko smiled, Aang's attacks were more desperate by the second, and as Zuko dodged, he got the opening he needed.

With a smirk, Zuko threw fire, not at Aang, but at the boughs of the tree above; fire raining down on the surprised Avatar. As Aang cried out in astonishment, Zuko ran in; quick as the burning leaves that rained down, Zuko used a roundhouse kick to Aang in the face. The Avatar went flying into a tree, and then slid to the ground with a groan of pain.

"So, this is the might of the Avatar." Zuko gloated over the fallen Aang, who shook his head in an attempt at clearing the kick that had dazed him. Zuko never gave him the chance to however; he reached down, lifting Aang by the front of his shirt, only to slam him in to the still burning tree and raining down more fire upon them both.

Aang whimpered, still dazed and with the burning twigs and leaves falling upon him, he attempted to squirm as embers attempted to light him on fire. Zuko removed these embers easily, not wanting to damage his prize any more. Zuko did not understand why he felt the need to physically touch Aang, brushing the embers off with his hand, using his full height to intimidate the smaller boy who stared up at him with bright eyes. "Aang, I win." He leaned in slightly, his expression unfathomable.

"I know." Aang hung his head in defeat, and Zuko's eyes narrowed, but the effect was lost on the tattooed youth whose gaze was averted. Zuko glanced at his hand as he felt wet, cold tears, and he could not keep the smirk off his face at such a victory.

"Aang. Aang." Zuko used his hand that was not holding the Avatar off the ground to force the smaller of them too look up. Aang was forced to see the scar upon Zuko's face, but there was no pity, just an infinite sadness in those deep soulful eyes. Zuko leaned in, his lips barely an inch from Aang's, the smaller boy gasped as his breath hitched in throat.

"Zuko..." Aang whispered, trembling in Zuko's grasp, bringing his hands to rest on the older boy's chest. "Wh- Wh- What are you...?

"Zuko!" The Prince was pulled from his almost kiss by a female voice, and as he turned, he saw a woman like no other. She had long black hair, with sparkling ruby eyes that shimmered, and her flesh was like polished porcelain. She was lithe of frame, with a developed chest, and slim hips. "Zuko, I have found you at long last!" She claimed, her eyes going all doe like.

"Who the hell are you?" Zuko demanded, and even Aang was a bit confused; one second he (Aang) was about to be kissed and the next, well the next Aang felt like he should run and hide! In both boys' just looking at the woman, both terrified and, aroused naughty thoughts. "And why the hell are you interrupting me?"

"Zuko! My love!" The girl proclaimed; her hips swaying as she glided like ashes on the wind, her red robe fluttering about her well-rounded legs. "What are you doing? You are too love me and no other. We must go through the trials, in which I shall be kidnapped numerous times, because I am the Second Avatar, from beyond the Fourth Wall." She proclaimed, "I shall be kidnapped, and you must rescue me. Then you will realise how much you truly love me and we will be together forever. You will take me as your bride and forget all about Aang and anything else that you once lived for. You shall lose your pride and become my love sick husband!"

"No I won't." Zuko returned, giving the woman a disbelieving frown, tainted with disgust. "Only reason I am here is because..." He looked to Aang, who was giving him a flat stare, "Serpentine, again with Serpent!" He dropped Aang, looked to the Sue and smirked. "Hell with this." He flamed her, and she exploded into all sorts of sparkly-poo.

"What happened?" Aang asked, confused as he brushed himself off. He looked about, then pointed off in a direction to their left. "Aim your fire right there." Zuko looked at Aang with a doubtful expression gracing his features. "Trust me."

Zuko did as told, and as the fire hit, Serpent was revealed, all twenty-five feet of metal, the deadly suit of armour like top and the sinuous serpent like tail bottom. "I'll kill you!" Zuko screamed, throwing fire at Serpent Armour. He chased the suit of armour around the Fandom, screaming how he was going to smelt Serpent into a Fire Nation Tank.

"Aye, only if I get ta run over Sues!" Serpent taunted back at him, and that seemed to fuel his anger. Serpent slithered, all twenty miles an hour, and lunging this way and that to avoid the balls of fire that Zuko launched at Serpent. Aang just sat back, watching the two go back and forth, wreaking havoc upon the Fandom. First to go up in flames was something by Preyofthedemons, and since it was so small it was nothing in a matter of seconds.

After that it was total chaos, as ZFT, and ILZ had to scramble to save their fan-fictions, since Serpent warned them ahead of time. Bleeding Wing lost everything, as that whole profile went up via Fire Nation flames and Plasma Axe revenge. "Stop with the fire a'ready! This stuff is made from ah very heat resistant alloy!" Serpent yelled in a thick accent.

"Not until you die!" Zuko said, full rage mode, in full effect. They trampled Powtronome's Stu fan-fiction, Serpent's tail tearing through the pages and Zuko's fire burning anything that survived. At least until he had to dodge the Plasma Cannons from Serpent's tail, which were double barreled.

"Hey Aang, what's going on?" Katara asked as she, Sokka and Zuko's Uncle showed up. They stood for a moment watching Serpent lung from one page of the Avatar Fandom, to the next, or another; Zuko hot on Serpent's tail.

"Nothing, Serpent was playing around with its' writing skills." Aang paused, then looked to Katara, "Hey, do any of you know if Serpent is male or female?"

"I don't know." Katara said, a frown creasing her caring features. "What happened?"

"Zuko almost kissed me, then this Sue showed up, but Zuko torched her." Aang confessed, missing the shocked expression on Sokka, Katara, and Iroh's features.

"Stop it Zuko!" Serpent screeched, lunging forward, and with the flat of the Axe, blocking a flame attack, sending the fire right into FanFic Rebel's profile. "I'm warning ya, I shall do somethin' bad! Like toss ya arse in a fan-girl pit!"

Zuko paused, standing up a little straighter, then he sighed, the flame in his hands leaving as he calmed down. Nothing was worse than a fan-girl pit, especially if you were a canon character.

"That will be enough Serpent." Came the voices that were, yet not. It was the Omnipotent Ones, and before the Messiah Serpent Armour, there stood Zuko's Flamethrower.

"Okay you two, I think you both have had enough fun for today." Zuko's Flamethrower said with a frown, her features never defined, leaving it up to the imagination to fill in the image of the Pantheon that was protected by the Omnipotent Ones.

"Aw, but it was jus' gettin' fun lass." Serpent said, slithering up to her as she stood calmly in the midst of the war torn Fandom. The suit of armour hunkered down to only nine feet tall, instead of the normal fifteen it often took too when running away in terror from Suethors.

"I know Serpent, but you have dealt enough damage to the Suethors this time around." Zuko's Flamethrower waves to the destruction and smoldering ruins around them. "Now stop playing around you silly little Serpent, and come on. We need you somewhere."

"Aight!" Serpent returns, following Zuko's Flamethrower in a flash of Omnipotent Light.

"Why do they get to leave the Fandom, but not us?" Sokka asked with a frown as looked at the others.

"Who cares, she never said we couldn't wreck havoc on the Suethors!" Zuko said, ready to bring on the fight to the Suethors. The others, with a shrugs, joined in; not like they had anything to lose other than being arse raped all the time.

A/N: I did a bit of editin'.