TOMMY

Reluctantly, I follow Zedd up to the bedroom. I really don't want to talk about what happened. Hopefully, he'll settle for watching a movie instead. Once we reach the bedroom, he crosses over to the dresser and opens a drawer. This one is full of movies too, but without the hidden panel. "See, Thomas? There are even some from Earth, if you'd prefer them."

"Why do you have movies from Earth?"

"I was bored after Mondo and Gasket snaked my palace and job from me. There's not much to do when stranded on a desolate rock you know." I suppose that does make sense.

"Didn't you have Dar and Pina for company?"

"I did, but they were usually off together as neither really desired to hang around Rita, and Rita in turn seemed to want to hang around me. So pick a movie or if not then let's talk."

I give them a cursory look, as I still can't read the titles, however talking isn't on my agenda right now, so I pull out one that the picture seems familiar on and hand it to him. "Here."

Seeming slightly disappointed he however takes it from me giving a nod. "Good choice. It's one of my favorites." As he moves over to the cabinet with the player and TV, I kick off my shoes and climb on the bed. He gets the movie started and joins me on the bed. I scoot away from him and I hear him sigh. "I'm not going to bite you, Thomas."

"I know." Keeping my eyes on the screen and purposely not looking at him as he sighs once more, I'm almost certain I can feel the frustration in his voice.

"Then why are you sitting so close to the edge that you're about to fall on the floor?" Shrugging in response, I keep watching the movie without really seeing it as he shifts slightly closer before rubbing his eyes. "Thomas I just don't see why…" Trailing off and looking at me for a long moment he in the end shakes his head deciding that whatever he was going to say apparently isn't worth it right now. "Never mind."

"I'm not trying to be a jerk."

"I didn't say you were." No, but your tone and arms crossed over your chest kind of imply it.

"You're not happy."

"No, I'm not." Sighing, as I cringe at his honesty, he continues in an exhausted tone. "I'm not happy because you're still punishing yourself, which means you're not happy. Add to it you won't let me help fix it, or tell me what to do that will make you happy again – Thomas I feel stuck right now because you won't let me help you, and I don't know if I would be helping or hurting you more if I just made you."

"I don't know." And I really don't. Part of me wants him to just do whatever he has in mind to 'help', however another part remembers all too well what happened the last time and how badly I could hurt him.

"Neither do I." Looking at me for a long moment, when he finally speaks up again it's not something I expect. "By the way, why did you tell me you didn't want me drinking anymore?"

I feel my face heat up as I suddenly recall all too well what he's referring to. "Just because."

I can feel his questioning look. "Just because? Surely there's more to it than that. Especially considering you had my personal stash out just a few hours before that, with two glasses. By the way that was very expensive liquor you were sipping on, so next time you feel the need to be evilly cool please use one of the cheaper bottles in the cabinet downstairs if you don't mind."

My blush is spreading, I just know it. "Fine."

"Good." Waiting expectantly, he apparently isn't going to let it go so easily. "Well?"

"Well what?"

"Well why did you tell me you didn't want me to drink anymore?" His exasperation showing, it seems I'm not getting out of this.

Grudgingly, I admit, "Because I couldn't taste you - just the alcohol."

"Oh." Oh? That's all he's going to say? Well apparently it is as silence falls as the movie continues to play, though I know he spends another good five minutes simply staring at me before thankfully turning back to the TV. I'm unreasonably grateful that he doesn't say anything else as the movie plays though, however I still find it hard to focus on the plot with him sitting there as if waiting for something.

When the movie ends, I glance over at Zedd to see that he's dozed off. I get up, restart the movie and resettle on the bed though a bit further from the edge this time. I start to doze off myself when a stray thought jerks me awake.

After the scan, I was simply his minion. It was only after I slept that I started to try and take over. What if the evil isn't gone? If I sleep again, will it come back? I can't chance it. I have to stay awake. I sit up and do everything I can think of to stay awake without waking him including placing the floor and taking another drink of his supposedly expensive whiskey.

An hour later, I catch myself dozing again and I know this is a losing battle. Between the migraine, how little I recall sleeping over the day and half after it, and how little I've eaten I know I'm not going to last through the night. I can't let anything happen and if I can't stay awake I'll have to go another route. I slide out of bed and head for the door. I can't help myself and look back at the sleeping man on the bed one more time. Softly, I say, "I'm sorry, Zedd, but I have to do this."

Quickly, I head for the dungeons, they'll eventually find me in the morning when they realize I'm gone and if I'm not a dangerous threat to their lives they can let me out. If I am, well they can deal with it. I find the keys hanging on a nail in the hallway. Taking a deep breath, I go in my cell, close and lock the door, tossing the keys back out in the hallway through the barred window in the door. Seeing the manacles in the corner, I quickly move over to them and put them on. That way, if I do turn evil again, they'll have a fighting chance. I curl up in the corner and wait for morning. I don't even realize when I start rocking. This is way too much like being in rehab and the memories come back full force, terror slowly filling my mind as well as a sudden desperate desire for Zedd to get me the hell out of here as soon as possible.