A/N - This chapter depressed me to write. Like I said in the last chapter, this one will be a short filler chapter dealing mostly with emotions (AKA the whole point of this story if you already didn't figure this out from the chapter titles) I actually teared up just a little from writing it. Maybe that was just because I was also listening to the song "Isn't something missing" by Evanescence. I always tear up during that song, So if you really want to get the feeling I had while writing this chapter, try listening to that song while reading. Trust me, you'll see the connection.
Sickness of the Heart
Chapter 15 - Loss
Peter finally saw the game Hook was playing at. He saw the way Hook was using Wendy against him. He saw the evil gleam in his eye as he made Peter make such a fatal decision. His own freedom or Wendy's safety. Peter looked into Wendy's tear stained face. He knew if he made the decision for his own safety, Hook would give a single order and the sharp metal would immediately be run through Wendy's neck.
Flashes of the dream Peter had long ago popped into his head. Still after so long, he saw the images so very vividly. Even the sound were vivid. The piercing scream in the night air. The sticky red liquid that tainted his pale skin. But the thing that he remembered the most was the sinking feeling that he got when he realized his only love was gone from the world forever. Ruthlessly killed by the edge of a knife. Even if it was but a dream, that was the most broken he had ever felt in his life.
He had almost lost Wendy to the cruel waters of Neverland. He was never going to let her die by the hands of Hooks crew. Even if that meant giving up his own life to Hooks unjust deeds. He never wanted to experience that horrible sense of uselessness again.
Hook awaited anxiously for Peters' answer. To Hooks surprise, Peter took a long time to answer a question Hook was sure Peter knew an immediate answer to. Either way Hook would get what he most desired. If Peter chose to save Wendy, Hook would have peter under his control. If he chose his own freedom, Wendy would be killed, thus killing Peter internally. Free for Hook to turn into his own lifeless puppet.
Finally, Peter used strength he thought he had lost to stand up to full height. Unfortunately, his full height only reached a little below Hooks chin. Not all to intimidating. Suddenly the air grew quiet. Tension on the ship rose to an all time high as Peter's answer was about to be revealed...
Wendy hated the cold burn of metal against her neck. It made her feel so helpless. Almost as if all her power was lost. Of course, that was how she had felt for the past year, nothing but helpless. At her fathers business party, as a wave of nausea hit her and she fell into unconsciousness, she felt helpless. When the nurse came into her room, held her cold hands and slowly told her she was dying, she felt helpless. When her father denied Neverland and Peter Pans existence, she felt helpless. It was an emotion she was used to, but she hated it with a passion, Now, as she waited for Peters answer, se felt helpless.
She wanted Peter safe and unharmed, but she came to Neverland to try to escape death. She shook her head. It would be awfully selfish of her to tell Peter to try to save her instead of himself. Suddenly, Peter stood and Wendy held her breath. An eternity passed as Peter struggled to find the right words.
"Let Wendy go Hook!" Peter said firmly. Hook smirked.
"Have it your way Pan." Hooks crew member who held tightly to Wendy, dropped the sword upon the deck.
"No Peter! You can't give yourself to Hook!" She couldn't deny the fact that she was happy to come out alive, but now what was to become of the famous Peter Pan? Was the eternal youth just going to give up that easily? Wendy looked over to Peter. The eternal youth looked back at her with emptiness in his eyes. The spark in them were gone. The fighting spirit in him was gone as well. The distant look on Peter's face made Wendy wonder just what peter was thinking. Whatever it was, it was the cause of Peters' sudden decision to just give up the fight
"Just go Wendy." Peter said suddenly. "I won't let you get you get hurt."
"Well, I won't let you get hurt either!" Wendy shouted back. " What are you doing? Why are you giving up?"
Peter's mind flashed back to his dream. He needed to get her out of here as soon as possible. He wasn't about to loose her.
"You heard me Hook, let her go!"
"Not without a little... reassurance." Hook wandered over to where Wendy was still being held captive. He pulled from his coat a vile containing a clear translucent liquid. Hook roughly grabbed Wendy by the hair and pulled her body to his, receiving a little squeak from Wendy. Peter lunged for them when he saw Wendy being hurt. Another pirate grabbed him before he was able to get to them.
"Calm yourself Pan." Hook reassured him. "For the past year, I have done naught but think of a plan to have what you have Pan and it is almost complete. The only threat from me that seems to faze you is when Wendy is in danger. So this... " Hook held up the vile. "is the danger that will keep you obedient." Hook took the vile and put it to Wendy's warm lips. He quickly poured the contents of the vile into Wendy's mouth, forcing the girl to swallow against her will. She quickly began to cough at the horrid taste of the concoction.
"What did you do to her?" Peter yelled out.
"The potion is non effective as long as you stay obedient." Hook slowly made his way over to his second desk which he kept on deck. He picked up a book laying on top it labeled, Curses of Neverland. " A little something I learned from this book that I swiped from the fairies. I give a single command that you are being disobedient and the potion then goes into effect." Peter averted his eyes towards the ground. Now things really seemed hopeless for him and possibly Wendy if he didn't act to Hooks approval.
"What will it do to her?" Peter once again reverted to using his childlike voice.
"Kill her." Hook said very quickly and nonchalantly. Peter wasn't all to surprised by Hooks answer.
"Peter no ... Don't do this..." Wendy said under her breath. Peter heard her plea and shook his head.
"Just go home Wendy." The girl was released from the pirates grasp but she stood hard as a stone, absolutely refusing to move.
"I'm not leaving." She protested. Peter let out a sigh and turned to where the lost boys stood.
"Tink, I know your in there." A small ball of light darted out of Nib's pocket and flew close to Peter's face. The two exchanged some quick last words. Tinerbell wanted desperately for Peter to fight Hook, but even his most trusted friend could not get him to fight at this point. The pixie let her head drop. She too lost much of her confidence once Peter gave up. She obeyed the orders given to her and flew over to Wendy. Tinkerbell took some dust she stored in her pocket and blew the mixture into Wendy's face. She stood there for a moment, completely stunned. Then a sudden wave of drowsiness overtook her body and she fell backwards into the arms of the lost boys.
"Take her home... and take good care of her..." Peter gave the Lost boys their final command. All he told Tinkerbell to do was put her to sleep using the same dust she had used on Peter to get him to give in to sleep awhile ago. This way, she would be in a peaceful sleep while Peter bowed to Hook. That was the last thing Peter wanted her to witness. He knew they didn't want to leave at a time like this, but they never went against Peter's orders either. As of now, it all came down to trust. Peter watched as the boys reluctantly flew off with Wendy in their arms.
Peter turned to Hook with his arms spread wide to reveal his bare chest.
"If you want to kill me, Have it your way. I'm ready Hook." Instead of striking Peter, Hook laughed at him.
"I have no intentions on killing you." Hook said to a disbelieving Peter. "However... We can't have you escaping now can we?"
Hooks crew took that as their signal to take Peter to the holding cell below the deck. Peter followed without a struggle. A walk down the bleak halls that seemed to take ages upon ages. The farther the pirates took him, the darker it grew. Finally they arrived at a small room enclosed by metal bars. They roughly threw Peter into the cell and turned to leave.
Once the cell door was closed and there were no more signs of the pirates, Peter leaned against the cold metal bars, This place was just so ... hopeless. Everything was dark, dismal and small. The silence was quickly getting on his bad side. It was the kind of silence one would rip their nails out over. Maybe that's exactly what Hook wanted. Maybe he wanted to reduce Peter into nothing but a lifeless shell by mean of solitary confinement. The thought of him being nothing but Hooks puppet was very disheartening. Peter slid down the wall and landed on the cold ground. He let tears run freely down his face. He drew his legs in close to his chest and put his head between them. "For the past year, I have done naught but think of a plan to have what you have Pan and it is almost complete."
What did Hook mean by those words? Peter angrilly banged his head on the wall behind him. He didn't really care at this point that it only did more damage then good. He hated being alone. He wanted someone beside him. Someone to break the silence that discomforted him and tell him everything would be ok, even though he knew it wasn't. 'What does Hook want that I have?' Peter asked himself. As of now, Peter had nothing Hook could want. He had absolutly nothing. Not even Wendy was here with him.
Dejectedly, peter peeled some rust off of the metal bars and flicked it to the ground. He had finally lost everything that made him who he was.
A/N - Damn... that just killed me to write Peter so angsty. Its like someone just stabbed my inner five year old XD Anyway, I warned you of the shortness. Even though it was short, I think it was very powerful. Especially the end, don't you think? I'm really proud of the end. Another announcement... The story is almost over! can you believe it? I've been writing this story for a year and its almost over! Only three more chapter. I will actually be sad when it over. I got so used to writing it.
And now... -sniffle- I need some chocolate and happy music to bring my inner five year old back from the dead.
OnemoreParadise: WAKE UP LITTLE BUDDY! PETERS JUST ALITTLE ... UPSET!
Inner five year old: Pffth... ok
Onemoreparadise: Your alive!
Inner five year old: Yes... and you promised me chocolate... So hand it over!
onemoreparadise: Why do I have such a mean inner five year old?
Inner five year old: You made me that way ...
Onemoreparadise: ... right...
